Enough Isn't Everything (Everything Trilogy) (35 page)

He turned to give me a panoramic view of himself,
and he had a great ass. “This is me, I’m naked. I was born like this, in my birthday-suit. Well, maybe except for the hair and the chubbie.” He grinned.

“Come on Lily, your turn.”
 I glared, still feeling freaked out and still way more sober than Will.

“I’m not taking this sheet off
,” I hissed.

Will smirked. “
Well, I know it’s not cuz you're hiding a cock there. My face was down there, remember,” he joked. I was shocked at his brazen approach to this. I clutched the sheet tightly in my hands and closed my eyes briefly.

Will’s fingers closed over my hands, and began pulling them away. “Let it drop Lily, I’m not ever going to do anything you don’t want to happen.” I wasn’t ashamed of my body, so I let him peel the sheet away, keeping my eyes closed.

I heard his breath hitch when he freed me of it. We stood in silence, which was broken by me several moments later. “Will?” I heard him swallow and his breathing sounded ragged.

“Yeah?” he husked.

“What do I do now?” Will blew a long slow breath out.

His voice was a little shaky
. “That’s your call. Don’t put me in charge of what happens next, my cock has had a thousand ideas about how this plays out.” I felt he was trying too hard to sound lighthearted, but I could hear the drop to a husk sound in his voice. 
Fuck, I’m in trouble.

I had no willpower with this stuff.
 I opened my eyes, and Will was giving me his full attention. His cock rested heavily in his hand. He was stroking it, but stopped when he saw me watching him. It twitched when he saw me. I licked my lips, my mouth was so dry.

“
Do you have any water?” My voice sounded like it was in the distance. He leaned down to the floor and produced a half drunk bottle of water that was wet on the outside from the condensation of being brought from the cold fridge to the heat of the room.

“I snagged this from the fridge before coming to bed
,” he offered by way of an explanation. I opened the bottle and drew some liquid in, a little escaped and a drop splashed onto my breast.

Before either of us could think about it, Will had reacted and his index finger brushed it off of my breast, causing me to feel breathless at his touch.

I shivered at his sudden touch, my nipples pebbling as goose bumps radiated throughout my body. My eyes darted to Will and locked into his serious, sensual stare. His eyes twinkled in the light and his pupils almost engulfed the gray of his eyes. He liked what he saw.

I lowered my eyes, not wanting him to see that
I, too, was curious about him, and worse still, feeling like I’d stooped to a new low. I was standing naked in a room with my best friend’s boyfriend, and my feelings weren’t being swayed by this fact.

He lifted his hand and crooked his middle finger under my chin, raising my eyes again to meet his.
 He smiled at me, and I could tell he was waiting to see what my response was. He wanted me to take responsibility for this.

I couldn’t do that, if anything was going to happen, it needed to be Will’s choice. I wasn’t the one in the relationship.

“Can I kiss you?” His eyes searched mine, and I pinched my lips as if to hide them in my face. I stared at him, and he stroked his hands down my hair, then flicked it back over my shoulders to leave my breasts totally exposed.

Will
 wet his lips as his finger stroked up my cheek and traced around my chin. He raised my face up again. I kept telling myself not to do this. His head came forward and he pressed his closed mouth on mine. His lips felt plump and moist, but it was a tender kiss, not exploratory.

His other hand stroked the length of my arm, but his touch was tentative
; he wasn’t sure.

I was glad for that, it showed me that he was considering the implications
of this before making any definitive moves on me. He was letting me think about it.

“Do you have any wine?” I asked, my voice sounding flat. I felt I needed a drink and to give myself some time. I wanted to stall him and get myself out of this before I did something I’d regret.

He stepped back. “Sure, I’ll be right back.” He disappeared, and I could hear glasses clinking and the pop of a bottle cork, then he reappeared at the bedroom door.

“I had this bottle of champagne
that we were given at the gig we did last week.” He sat on the bed, the mattress dipping as he did this. I stood in front of him. He wasn’t concerned by his nakedness or mine. I was more than a little shy that he kept looking at me.

He dragged the back of his finger down my arm.
 “Your skin is so damned soft. I have never felt skin like it. I’ve wanted to tell you that so many times when I’ve stroked your arm, but thought you might think I was freaky, or had a fetish, or was coming on to you.” He smiled cheekily.

“And now you are
,” I said quietly.

“Fuck, you’re so fucking beautiful, and fuck… I don’t want to be weird around you because of this Lily. Tell me if this is going to change us and I’ll leave the house right now.” I raised my eyebrow.

“Would you?”

He passed me the
 half full glass of champagne. I put my mouth to the rim of the flute and felt some of the bubbles disperse on my face before the dry taste invaded my mouth. Will shifted himself up the bed to lean against his headboard, pulling a pillow and tossing it behind him to support his head. He watched me over the glass.

I stared at him.
 “What are we doing Will?” He put his glass down, and crawled down the bed to me. I was now perched on the edge like a frightened kitten, ready to scoot out of the door. He cupped his hands over my shoulders; his touch made me shiver.

“See
,” he said, “I haven’t touched you anywhere remotely erogenous yet and you’re shivering.”

“I don’t think you can say that when your tongue…” I didn’t finish what I was saying and Will was grinning at me.

“Sorry,” he said. I sipped my drink again, looking at him as he shifted himself alongside me, his back to the edge of the bed and his legs curled to the side.

“I’m going to do something to either change this up or get us at it.
 If you say stop, we go back to doing what we’ve always done, and this never happened. Okay?” He came around in front of me. “Lily, I’m going to have to kiss you for this.”

He gave me little time to think, I couldn’t. He pulled me onto my feet and grabbed my hair from the nape. The thumb of one hand stroked down my throat and across my collarbone, as his tongue pierced through
my lips and explored my mouth.

His hand fell from my hair and traced down to the small of my back, and bac
k up my ribs, to cup my breast. I shuddered under his touch. It was one of the most sensual kisses ever, full of feeling.

There was a pool of moist wet liquid that actually left my slit and found its way onto my leg. I moaned loudly, and he stepped away from me.

I felt like I’d lost an arm when he separated from me, as I waited for what was next, and he did something that completely shocked me, but was so fucking hot at the same time. The tension between us was now so high we couldn’t have stopped even if we wanted to.

He took his cock in his hand and rubbed his thumb over his glans, smearing it in pre cum. Will traced it
along my lips before pushing his thumb into my mouth. “Suck it, Lily… taste me.” I parted my lips and his thumb slid across my tongue. “You know how I taste now.”

He stared longingly at me.
 “Are you curious how it feels? Do you want to feel me? He took my hand palm up in his palm, and cupped his shaft in it, closing his hand in mine, and wrapped my fingers around it.

He hitched his breath, and held
 my hand in his. He began to stroke himself using my hand guided by his. It was so arousing, to watch him pleasure himself using me. “I want to taste you again, Lily. Do you want to taste more of me?” I didn’t answer, but he dropped to his knees, lifting one of my legs, the mattress dipped slightly as he balanced my foot on it.

His fingers ran up my legs.
 “Your legs are still splendid without the fuck-me heels.” He smiled. His fingers found my sensitive flesh, which was moist and warm, and he groaned and growled, as he drew his fingers down it, slipping one inside me as he struggled to control his breathing. “Fuck.”

He
 knelt in front of me, his cock fell from my hand, and he lifted my leg from the bed and placed it over his shoulder. He ran his nose down my entrance, and buried his face deep between my legs.

His tongue swirled
 around my moist heat, arousing me further, taunting my nub, and teasing at my entrance. He sucked my juices and buried his tongue deep inside me.”Mmm.”

He made loud sucking noises, and groaned again, “God, so fucking delicious.” His eyes stared up at me as I stared back at him. My eyes rolled at the pleasure he gave me
, and I felt myself tighten inside.

My legs started shaking, and I buckled as I came. “I got you
,” he whispered. His tongue was replaced by two fingers as his other hand supported my weight.

He pushed me back on the bed, and replaced his fingers with his tongue again. I came hard again. “Oh,
God.” He licked and sucked at my clitoris, devouring me.

I tried to crawl backwards on the bed, away from him, but he clenched my thighs, locking them in his strong arms and dragged me back into place.
 He pulled away and smiled, stroking my belly, and I shuddered again.

“Ah, not finished yet?”
 he cooed. He stood, and I grasped his large stiff cock in my hand. I returned the act on him and withdrew him so that he came on my breasts. He smiled, and I smiled back, but felt bad at the same time, knowing that we were both going to regret this.

Will lay us on the bed, and we were quiet for a few minutes until he broke the silence. “You’re feeling pretty shitty now
, aren’t you?” Silent tears ran down my face, and I realized that apart from when I came, I had not voiced my feelings at all during sex with him.

“Don’t beat yourself up Lily.
 Saffy and I are done, so you didn’t do anything wrong.” I held my breath at what Will said, then exhaled heavily.

“Didn’t do anything wrong, Will? Jesus, even this is a new low for me.” Will sat up sharply folding his arms across his chest.

“Thanks,” he mumbled. 
Shit! 
“I didn’t mean it like that Will. I meant another major screw up on my part. I was the sober one. Your judgement is impaired because of the alcohol. I don’t have that excuse.”

“Oh, no you don’t. You were the one that woke up with my head between your legs.” He smirked.
 “Lily, I still made the move after I knew it was you.”

He turned to face me. “You can’t take the blame for that.” I hid my face in my hands.

“I should have told you to stop, I didn’t.” He lay back flat on his bed, stretched out and unashamed. “Well, I had a great time, so I’m not sorry.”

He sighed. “If
 Saffy hadn’t acted all heavy tonight she’d be here and not you. I’m done with her now. I can’t take any more of her shit. I had pretty much made my mind up when she stormed off earlier.” I stared at him, not saying anything.
What could I say?

“Lily, I won’t ever tell her we did this if that’s what’s worrying you.” I felt ashamed.

“It isn’t that she may find out, it’s the fact that I did that to her.” Will sighed
.

“You didn’t do anything
. I’m not with her, and I’m not going back on that, Lily.”

I jumped out of bed and pulled on my jeans. “Where are you going? It’s fucking
two thirty in the morning.” I continued clipping my bra at the back.

“No Will, this is wrong,
 this isn’t good for us at all, and Saffy deserves better.”

“
It looks like she was right not to trust us.” Will snorted and turned the nightstand light on. “Are we going to be okay? I’ll speak to her tomorrow.” I swivelled around on the balls of my feet.

“You mean can we still work together? Sure.”

I pointed at the bed and wagged my finger between us. “This isn’t going to be repeated under any circumstances. I must be out of my mind to have been with you in that way.”

He looked hurt, but I couldn’t comfort him
. What we did was wrong, and I had to make sure that it didn’t happen again. He meant too much to me. I called a cab, agreeing to speak to him when I had a little more time to absorb what had happened between us.

“You’re taking
 Saffy to the end-of-year party next week. You’re not dumping her before that,” I spat at him. “You can at least let her have a good time at Christmas.”

I sat in the cab on the way home and was so angry with myself and with Will. We should have had more restraint. It made me think about my relationship with my closest and oldest friend, Jack, back in the UK.

Elle used to tell Jack and me, “Get a room, already,” because of our flirty relationship. We’ve been friends since we were four years old and still remain as tight as ever.

The thought of that kind of thing happening with him would rock our relationship to the core.
 I had seen Will as someone that would be in my life a long time, but now, I wasn’t sure that we hadn’t blown our special connection. I guessed only time would tell.

I avoided seeing
 Saffy before college and for most of that week. Will and I were having disagreements about who was responsible for what happened. Saffy was determined that we get ready for the party at Will’s, when party night arrived.

I had no choice but to give in to her, no matter how awkward it would be to have all three of us together where the ‘crime’ had taken place.

Every time she was nice to me, I wanted to burst into tears and tell her what happened.

I had grabbed the tequila shots Will offered a little too
eagerly to help hide my guilt and was a little tipsy by the time we left for the party.

Holly, Brett, Mandy
, and Neil came over, and we had prearranged a passenger van with driver to take us so that we could really let our hair down.

It made me feel worse that everyone was in couples, so when a couple of Neil’s friends came to sit with us at our table, I felt much less self-conscious about not having a partner.

Neil’s friend, Nick, was a great guy though. We had met a few times previously. He leaned over the table smiling at me. “Has anyone told you how gorgeous you are tonight?” I blushed, they had, but I shook my head. It was nice to know that I was still attractive, even if inside I was an emotionally demolished slut.

Nick
 tugged on my arm, his voice lost in the loud music. “Dance with me?” His head gestured toward the dance floor. I was about to say no, but found myself nodding instead. I really didn’t know what the hell my body was going to do from one minute to the next these days.

The place was buzzing, there was a great
 atmosphere. Being a music school a lot of us agreed to do a couple of songs each. There was a resident DJ too, so the mix of live music and popular dance tunes kept the entertainment fresh.

Nick led me onto the dance floor. There were a lot of people here already. A couple of them actually looked as if their party had started long before the official one. He was a fantastic dancer, and I noticed a few other women watching us together. I tried to relax and made myself a promise there and then to try to enjoy the night and forget about all the complex dramas in my life.

Will came over and shouted above the noise of the bass heavy music. “We’re next up Lily, ten minutes.” I nodded and grabbed Nick’s waist, pulling him in close to me. He looked surprised, but smiled, bending to hear what I was saying. “I have to get ready, we’re playing when this is done.” He nodded and walked back to the bar with me.

I changed from my pumps into my
 stiletto ankle boots, with my short emerald fitted dress. I felt so much more confident in them. Neil commented, “Jesus, Lily you were sexy before the heels, now you’re gonna have every man in the room’s tongue hanging out.”

I smiled,
 blushing at Neil’s comment, but I really didn’t need any references about attracting men, or their tongues right now. Will chuckled, widening his big gray eyes. “Yeah, Lily’s legs grow even longer in fuck-me heels.” He smirked. Saffy scowled, batting his arm and told him not to make rude comments about me, and I felt bad again.

Walking toward the stage, Will leaned in, commenting under his breath, “I can’t help it, they turn me on, legs in heels like that
, scream for fingers to wander up them. “ He grinned and I scowled, not wanting to offer him any encouragement.

“Don’t do that, Will.” After I said it, I
realized that things would be different between us now.

We breezed through our number
, and Will hugged me afterwards, spinning me around when he saw that Saffy was safely over on the other side of the bar with her back turned.

“Stop
flirting!” I commented, annoyed he still was so tactile.

“Come, dance with me.” He started pulling me toward the dance floor
. I looked at over at Saffy and Will slung his arm around my shoulder, bending forward. “You know Lily we’ve got to move forward, it happened. I’m not sorry,” he reminded me.

I didn’t want to be the person he used to prove a point
to my best friend though. It was fortunate that the DJ had put on an upbeat number, and not one that required any tactile behavior or Saffy may have had a coronary, and so might I have.

Nick was lining up shots
 when we joined the others. We all had three each. I protested saying I’d be too drunk to finish the evening if I swallowed them, but everyone clapped and goaded me until I found myself throwing the first one back. It burned, and I cringed. My tongue was hanging out once I’d swallowed it, and I spluttered and coughed as some went down my windpipe.

Everyone drunk all of theirs really quickly, leaving the focus on me again as I still had two left. “Come on Lily
. Down, Down. Down,” they chanted. I pinched my nose, forgetting about the salt altogether and threw another one back into my throat. It tasted marginally better than the last one.

My third shot was handed to me before I’d had time to recover
. “Just do it.” Will’s eyes glinted at me humorously. I hesitated, then lifted the tequila to my lips. My throat was numb by that time, because I didn’t really notice anything sting when I drunk it. I felt warm and happy as the alcohol hit my brain and put me into ‘fuzzy motion.’

This was right up there with slow motion, but less coordinated.
 I became really tipsy though, I’d had two shots already and a white wine spritzer. Not to mention the vodka and cranberry when we’d arrived.

My face had a warm fuzzy feel about it
, and I didn’t feel nearly as inhibited as I had at the beginning of the night. Nick grabbed my hand, “Dance time.” He began dragging me to the dance floor again.

The music had taken a more sexy tone, or maybe it was the drink
. I’m not sure which, but Nick’s dancing seemed much more suggestive toward me. I felt a tap on my shoulder.

“Hey
,” he cooed. “Dance, Lily?” Alfie’s incredibly sexy smile was right there, at eye level. His eyes flashed to Nick. “Do you mind, dude?”

Nick was about to protest, but I put my hand on his arm. “
It's fine.” I smiled sweetly at him, half drunk, and Alfie was as sexy looking as ever. “I would love to dance with Alfie.” Nick looked annoyed, but headed toward the bar.

The music changed to a slower song, and Alfie tentatively gestured to me for permission to put his hands on my waist. I shrugged
, and he slid his arms around my waist. I moved closer to him and put my arms around his neck.

We were slow dancing after all, and I’d had more to drink than I should have had. My breath still hitched when his arms slid around me, and he flashed a sexy smile at me when he noticed.

His eyes became hooded and he bent forward, his cheek supporting the side of my head as his head leaned against mine. 
I’ve missed him
. I closed my eyes. He smelled familiar, of fresh bodywash and… him. I’d forgotten how good he felt and smelled, and the tension I felt with him melted away.

I leaned my forehead on his shoulder and closed my eyes.
 My stomach fluttered, and I was shaking slightly with our closeness and his touch. My heart raced, and my mouth was dry. I licked my lips a few times, but thought I might be dehydrated from the alcohol.

We began moving slowly, and after a minute he leaned back to look at me, giving me his incredible smile that made me weak and broke my heart all over again. He brought his face back closer to my ear, whispering huskily, “Lily, you take my breath away
. You’re so beautiful tonight.”

I didn’t say anything, and I wanted to cry at his compliment.
 I was trying not to feel the hurt inside of me. His arms tightened around my body, his hands gliding lower to the base of my back, drawing me closer to him, so that we were connected from our heads to below our hips.

“Your hands feel good.” I had said what I was thinking. It was stupid.

He smiled slowly, murmuring, “That’s because they like feeling you.” He leaned back to catch my gaze when he said it, then kissed the top of my head. Previously, his touch had left me paralyzed, but not this time. I was being just as tactile as he was.

My hands ran up his back,
 one came around to his chest, my fingers running up the length of him and tangling in his hair. He groaned loudly, “God.” His heartbeat quickened at my touch, I heard it when my I laid my head against his chest and felt it under my hand.

Alfie
 sighed. “I’ve missed you being in my arms,” he said softly. I tilted my head to look up at him and he smiled, his little dimple slightly breaking my heart again for the second time that night. His eyes had the green hue tonight, depicting his lust for me. I wanted him to look at me tonight and see someone who’s confident and carefree. Even though I didn’t feel like that around him.

He spun me around and stood close
 behind me, his hands moved down lightly onto my hips. He splayed his fingers wide, then saddling into me, nuzzled his face into my neck and kissed it lightly.

He circled his hips into mine as I leaned back against his chest, my arms reached up around his neck again. I could feel how turned on he was. My control was dissolving
, and I wanted him so badly. He bent to kiss my temple, then moved his lips to my ear. “Remember your safe words.”

My body hummed as
 did his, and he was telling me how to tell him to back off, that I could stop this if I wanted to. I didn’t. “I don’t need them tonight,” I murmured, and moaned loudly when he hit a soft spot on my neck.

His looks, scent, touch,
and voice were amazing. I wanted to taste him as well. Tonight, I just wanted to feel him inside me again. Maybe to blur the memory of what happened with Will, or maybe just because…

He leaned back from me again
. “I’m not going to use you, Lily. I just want to feel you near me,” he growled. I smiled seductively.

“Pity…” I told him shamelessly. “Wouldn’t you rather have a private party with me, or are you happy to stand here and dry hump me on the dance floor?”

His eyes flashed with pleasure and lust at my words and he grinned wickedly. “You’re hot when you talk dirty,” he murmured humorously kissing my neck. It sent a sensational current running between it and my clitoris and a rash of goose bumps cascading over my skin.

“Restroom and we need to get out of here
,” I said patting his chest and heading for the restrooms. Alfie grabbed my arm roughly.

“Don’t fucking dick with me, Lily.” I raised my eyebrow
.

“I’m not…dicking.” I smirked and turned on my heel.

Will was suddenly beside me, grabbing my arm as I reached the restroom door. He swung me around pulling me slightly close into him. He walked me back toward the wall.

“What the fuck are you doing, Lily? You were a mess because of him.” I patted Will’s chest.

“Not what the fuck am I doing Will, but whom?” I giggled, still a bit tipsy.

Will’s face was angry
. “You want to go have sex? Is that all? Can’t you pick another guy in the room?” I twisted my mouth.