Equivocal Death (35 page)

6

She was almost out of her office when she turned to look back at 7

her desk. She stared at the photograph for a second or two, then 8

walked over and picked it up. She held it in her hand for another 9

few seconds, uncertain about what to do. Then, with sudden deci-10

sion, she put it back in the red-sealed envelope and added the 11

packet to the pile in her arms. Once outside her office, Kate 12

stopped by Jennifer’s station. “If anyone calls, I’ll be in Carter 13

Mills’s office.” Then she turned and headed for the stairs.

14

15

16

Light sifted in through venetian blinds, patterning Carter Mills’s 17

face. He held the envelope in one hand, studying the red wax seal.

18

Then he looked back at Kate.

19

“When did you receive this?” he asked.

20

“Either yesterday or early today,” Kate said. “I’m really not quite 21

sure.”

22

“I see.”

23

“The photograph is inside.” Kate was anxious to wind this up, to 24

move on to the subject of Thorpe.

25

“It’s a picture of a woman,” Kate said. “Someone who looks a lot 26

like Madeleine Waters. I have no idea why it was left with me. But 27

I thought you should probably see it.”

28

Carefully, like a scientist handling a specimen, Mills reached 29

into the envelope and pulled out the cardboard liners. With two 30

fingers, he removed the top piece and placed it off to the side. From 31

the slick photographic paper, the dark-haired woman smiled up at 32

him, her strangely expressive hand reaching outward. Welcoming.

33

Pushing away.

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Mills looked back at Kate, his eyebrows raised. “You really think 2

that this woman looks like Madeleine Waters?” he said.

3

Kate wasn’t sure what to say. The resemblance was so striking.

4

She hadn’t considered that Mills might not see it. “I . . . yes, yes I 5

do,” she said. But the question opened a wedge of doubt. Could the 6

pressure of the past few days be affecting her judgment? She’d 7

made the connection so quickly: between the picture and the let-8

ter
M
seal, she’d immediately jumped to conclusions. But of course 9

the letter
M
stood for many things other than Madeleine.

10

Mills, for example.

11

Or McCarty.

12

Or what about Martin, as in Martin Drescher? She felt giddy, 13

lightheaded, as the names piled up.

14

Linda Morris.

15

Douglas Macauley.

16

Or even Michael . . .

17

Her head was swimming, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself.

18

Mills was studying the picture. “I just don’t see it,” he finally 19

said. “The mouth maybe, but aside from that . . .” He raised a dis-20

missive hand.

21

“Well . . .,” Kate didn’t know what to say.

22

“Do you have any idea where it came from?”

23

“No. None.”

24

Mills’s eyes returned to the picture. Again, Kate noticed the bars 25

of light that flickered across his face. The venetian blinds almost 26

made it appear as if he were inside a cell.

27

Hands folded, Mills leaned forward. “You know, Kate, there’s a 28

lot of gossip flying around now. It’s not helpful. Not helpful to the 29

police investigation, not helpful to the firm. Have you talked to 30

anyone else about this photograph, about the resemblance you see 31

to Madeleine?”

32

“No.” Kate felt a flutter of relief, as though she’d finally done 33

something right. Then, without warning, relief gave way to resent-ort 34

ment. All she’d thought about for the last two days was protecting reg 35

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rush of feeling took her by surprise. She’d had no idea it had been 1

there waiting, just beneath the surface of her thoughts.

2

But Mills was talking again. “Please keep it that way,” he said.

3

“I’m sure you understand the importance of keeping rumors to a 4

minimum. There’s only so much we can do to keep people from 5

speculating. But we need to do what we can.”

6

We.
Even now, Kate felt the seductive lure of inclusion.
We.
The 7

attorneys of Samson & Mills. She could feel the resentment ebb.

8

“Of course,” Kate said. “I won’t say a word.”

9

“If anything else unusual happens, please come to me immedi-10

ately.”

11

Kate looked at Mills, confused. “But if the photo doesn’t even 12

look like Madeleine —”

13

Mills interrupted, impatient. “No, Kate,
I
don’t see a resem-14

blance. But obviously you do. And that concerns me. In a situation 15

like this, it’s impossible to be too careful.”

16

There was an unaccustomed edge to Mills’s voice. Still Kate 17

found herself pressing ahead. “Do you think I should talk to the po-18

lice then?”

19

“Absolutely not,” Mills said. “I’ll handle all communications 20

with the NYPD.”

21

His displeasure seemed almost tangible. Kate felt heat rise up 22

through her face. “Of course,” she said. It was an effort to keep her 23

voice level.

24

“I’m sorry, Kate,” Mills said, his voice softening ever so slightly.

25

“I don’t mean to be harsh. But it’s imperative that we keep a tight 26

rein over all outside communications.”

27

“I understand,” Kate said. She took a deep breath. This was 28

hardly the atmosphere in which she wanted to discuss Chuck 29

Thorpe, but she didn’t have any choice. She’d already waited too 30

long. Heart lurching against her ribcage, she tentatively embarked 31

on the speech she’d prepared. “There’s something else I need to 32

discuss with you. It’s about Chuck Thorpe. On Monday night —”

33

“I’m sorry, Kate, but this will have to wait. I have something im-34 sh

portant to take care of.”

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Kate stared at him, disbelieving. Her script didn’t allow for this 2

response. “But this is really urgent,” she stammered. “It will only 3

take a few minutes, and I need —”

4

“I’ll speak with you as soon as I can,” Mills said. His voice was 5

pleasant but firm. “Check with Clara. She knows my schedule. I 6

should have some time later today.”

7

w

8

Carter Mills stared out the window. His skin felt hot, as though 9

he’d been struck with a sudden fever. He couldn’t seem to order his 10

thoughts. Words came together, then drifted apart. Mainly, they 11

were questions, the stunned beginning of questions that he didn’t 12

want to consider.

13

Behind him was the photograph. It lay on his desk, waiting.

14

Slowly, he turned back to face it. Just a single flimsy piece of paper, 15

slightly worn at the edges. There was nothing remarkable about 16

the image. Just an ordinary candid shot. A pretty woman on a 17

summer day. Perfectly ordinary. Perfectly generic.

18

Yet not to him.

19

He hadn’t thought of this scene for years. But now, with the pic-20

ture before him, it came back like it was yesterday. Downtown 21

Manhattan. Late August. A sultry summer evening. He’d left work 22

early, having just finished drafting a brief. Rounding a corner, he’d 23

caught sight of her, standing there on the doorstep. He’d called out 24

to her amid the neighborhood clamor, and she’d quickly spun 25

round to face him. Her face showed a blend of emotions, pleasure 26

mingled with chagrin. He was early that day, and she hadn’t had 27

time to prepare.

28

Still, she’d been happy when he snapped her picture. Happy, he 29

knew, because she’d seen it as a sign of love. A sign that even during 30

their brief separations, he wanted her close at hand. Yet, somehow, 31

he hadn’t felt guilty. Merely amused by the irony: what she saw as 32

a sign of devotion was really his first step away. Soon she’d belong 33

to the past.

ort 34

It had all come clear that afternoon. Though perhaps, at some reg 35

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level, he’d known from the start. Decades had passed since that 1

day. But the memories were clear as glass.

2

“Very good.” William P. Sloan raised his leonine head and looked at
3

Mills appraisingly. “Very, very good.”

4

“Thank you, Mr. Sloan.” Mills felt a satisfying twist in his gut, like
5

the sprockets of a gear engaging, like a plane lifting into the sky. He ran
6

over the words in his mind. The great William P. Sloan liked his brief.

7

Life was suddenly good. The future was his for the taking.

8

With casual grace, Sloan folded his hands. Mills filed the gesture
9

away, knowing he’d adopt it as his own. “Your grandfather was one of
10

this firm’s founders. You show every sign of being a worthy heir. I cer-11

tainly hope that you’ll return to us after graduation.”

12

Again, the surge of triumph. Formal offers of employment were not
13

generally issued until summer’s end. And yet, here he was, being per-14

sonally wooed by the firm’s presiding partner. But he was careful to keep
15

his voice level, as if simply accepting his due.

16

“That’s exactly what I’m hoping,” he said.

17

Mills gazed at Sloan, so powerful, so complete. So different from his
18

hidebound father, the keeper of books, of records, of family trees. Noth-19

ing compared to the vital figure before him, a man of action who lived for
20

the day.

21

The sort of man he, Carter Mills, would become.

22

By the time he’d left work that day, his mind was already made 23

up. Childhood was over. He was an adult. And she had no place in 24

his life.

25

He’d purchased the camera and film on his way downtown. He’d 26

meant to buy color film, had been annoyed on discovering his mis-27

take. But the irritation quickly faded as she came into view. Focus-28

ing on the slender form, he’d felt a rush of power. As if the secret 29

knowledge that he would hurt her somehow confirmed his 30

strength.

31

And, really, she’d had no idea. She’d been giddy that evening, 32

euphoric. They’d split a bottle of wine. He’d even smiled as she’d 33

babbled about the future. A future that would never be.
She loved
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the theater, but she loved him more. She loved him more than any-2

thing. . . .

3

As, for a time, he’d loved her.

4

Loved her with a reckless passion that he hadn’t felt before or 5

since.

6

Mills shifted in his chair, remembering. It had begun as a chance 7

meeting, an instantaneous spark. He’d been on his way to a movie 8

when he’d seen her through the window of a small cafe. In an in-9

stant, he’d changed his plans. He went in and sat at a table, the 10

marble top cold to his touch. By the time he left two hours later, 11

her number was in his book.

12

But slowly that memory faded, and he was left with the picture 13

on his desk. He could feel the paranoia setting in, the sense of im-14

potent rage. It had to be someone who’d known her. A family 15

member or friend. Someone who knew what he’d done. But even 16

with the resources at his command, how could he find out who?

17

Secretaries, paralegals, word processors, librarians — any one of 18

them could be the culprit.

19

If only he could figure out the motive, that would be some kind 20

of start. But he still didn’t have a clue. If blackmail were the goal, 21

why not approach him directly? Why leave the picture on an asso-22

ciate’s desk, not even knowing that it would reach him?

23

Mills felt a sort of buzzing, a vibration beneath his skin. Of all 24

the human feelings, powerlessness was the one he hated most.

25

Well, if he didn’t yet have the answer, he could at least take care of 26

one thing.

27

From a table behind him, Mills picked up a granite ashtray. He 28

set it down on his desk. Then he took a pair of scissors from a 29

drawer. Neatly, methodically, he cut the photograph into long, 30

thin strips. Next, he stacked the strips together and cut them cross-31