Facing Me (6 page)

“You’ll never
work again.” I hear Jackson groan, while some of the others help him up.
 His mouth and nose both pouring blood while he stares at me. “Shaft.
 Is.  Over.”  

“You think I
give two fucks what you think of me, Jackoff?” I snap.  His mouth curls at
the mention of our nickname for him.  “You’ll never get your hands on
Shaft.” I growl, trying to keep from tearing into his ass again.  Daisy
nods at Henry who shoves me into the room.

“Henry, make
sure Abby and everyone get to their seats.  I’ll get the guys to the
stage.”  Without waiting for a response she slams the door, leaving us
alone.

Daisy won’t meet
my eyes.  I don’t know how long we stand here, me looking at her while she
looks at the ground but it’s a while.  Seriously, where is the ‘high noon
standoff music’ and tumble weeds?  Daisy Cole, who never shuts up, now
doesn’t say a word, she just stares at her shoes.  I stand stock still,
pleading silently for her to meet my eyes.  Wanting to hear her tell me
what an ass I made of myself in front of Abby and how disappointed she is.
 How it’s all over and all my fucking fault.  Nope, nothing.

“Daisy, I’m
sorry.  That shouldn’t…” My words are lodged in my throat as her tear
filled eyes meet mine.

“Cut the shit
Aiden.  You’ve been spiraling for too long.  I let it go because you
seemed to be dealing with whatever is up your ass in your own way.” Daisy paces
the room in long strides; her blonde hair swishing back and forth, while she
thinks this all out in her head. “You’ve gotta talk to someone about this shit,
other than Cunter.  He thinks you need ‘fuck Cam outta your system’
therapy.  We both know that can’t happen.  I know exactly what you
do
need.” She says watching my face.  

I nod like a
scolded child.  Of course I can’t just act out what I do with just anyone,
that’s how you get in trouble.    With the band catching
popularity so quickly, the tabloids would kill for some dirt like that. “I know
Daisy.  It’s not like that, I promise.  All I did was…”

“LA LA LA LA”
She shrieks, covering her ears with her hands. “Um, no details!” Walking over
to me, she kisses my cheek.  My insides soften immediately. Daisy has
become our sister and I love her, to know she isn’t mad at me makes me relax.
“Get a handle on your inner demons, Aiden, but without the help of Hunter and
his sick fuckscapades.  We both know you’re better than that.”

Daisy is the only
one who really knows, from both sides, how everything went down that last night
in Minnesota.  I’ve told her how much I ache when Cam isn’t with me.
 How I can’t sleep without her.  All the music in my head makes me
desperate for someone who might understand; I let my wall down. “I miss her.
 She’s not mine anymore, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t let her go.
 I close my eyes and there she is, Daisy; she haunts me like a ghost.”

“Oh, Aiden, I
knew you weren’t okay…” She hugs me making me feel too vulnerable because even
she realizes it and lets me go. “Sorry.”

Shaking my head,
I clear my throat. “I’m fine.” I walk over to the bar, grab a glass and pour a
shot to calm my nerves. “Have you heard from them?  Do you know what Chase
was calling about?” I ask, then down my shot before pouring another.

She suddenly
turns very sad, but then she just shakes her head. “Not anything to worry you
about, Aiden.  Come on, time to get you boys on stage.  Possibly for
the last time.” She murmurs sadly.  Wrapping my arm around her, we walk
out: Gray, Daisy and I walk up the ramp to take the stage. “Hunter, you shit!
 Where the hell are you?” She calls out, impatiently.

“Hang on to your
tits pregger.  I’m coming!” Hunter shouts from behind a curtain.
 Fumbling out, he zips his pants mumbling something that is followed by a
raspy female giggle. “Had to tend to my injuries.  Sexy bitch kissed me
all better.” He moans.  I see a flash of reddish brown hair but not much
else, just enough to let me know it’s not Tuesday doing the nursing.  I
do
not
want to see Evan kill my brother with his own jewels.  If I hadn’t
put Hunter is his place, I have no doubt a fight would’ve went down.

“You’re a sick
man.” Daisy says, then hops up onto her stool. “Get out there and rock this shit
so that Gray can sing me my cover.”

Running out on
stage, I toss my shirt into the audience then climb behind my kit.
 Yanking my sticks up from the Toms, I start pounding out my beat.
 The feeling of euphoria I have behind my skins is indefinable.  It’s
like nothing on Earth.  
Except for being with Cam…  Don’t go there
Aiden.
  Every thump on my bass pedal is her name, only driving
me harder.  I kick up the tempo until it matches the beating of my racing
heart.

BAM WHAM THUMP
BAM BAM BAM THUMP THUMP

Gray is wailing
on his guitar, while Hunter kicks in singing our newest song.  Gray and I
have been writing a lot of great music on the tour, the stuff is just flowing.
 Between him falling for and marrying Daisy, along with my relationship
with Cam, or lack thereof, we’ve had a lot of new material.  

The crowd is
going wild, while we do what we do best.  Rule a stage.
 I
command
the stage
.  This is not me being ‘Aiden, the cocky fucker’, you can
stuff that bullshit.  This is being aware of my badass ability.  I
throw it out to the crowd while they all drown in it.  Soak it up, because
that is what it is.  It’s the drink for your thirst, the drug that you’re
craving.  It’s the good hard fuck you need, but can’t get from anywhere
else.  No one leaves one of our shows unhappy; you leave completely
satisfied and walking a little funny.  My beat is what regulates the
entire song.  I dictate the flow, every time, from song to song.
 Daisy jokes that my kit is my throne; I have to agree with her.  I
feel like a king, powerful and imposing when I’m sitting here.  It’s my
complete liberation, stripping all the rage and shit from inside my head.
 When I’m beating my skins, I’m where I belong.  

Between songs, I
look over and see Daisy watching us.  Mostly, she’s watching Grayson.
 I can still remember Cam watching from stage left with Daisy and mauling
me with kisses the minute I hit the curtain.  
The things you miss and
will never have again.  
I’ll never give to anyone the things I let Cam
have freely.  She got me, really fucking saw me for who I am, then, BAM.
 Over, just like that.  

“I sure hope you
like it to last for hours, you sexy kittens.” Hunter purrs into the microphone
between songs. “We love draggin’ it out so you beg for more.  Let me hear
you sexy bitches scream while you take your dose of Shaft.” He roars, grinding
his hips into the mic stand.

By the time we
finish our last song, my hands are pulsing and my body is drenched in sweat.
 It’s an amazing feeling, this high I get just from beating sticks against
the skins. “Alright Nashville, thanks for being awesome motherfuckers.
 Here’s the married spooner to sing some sappy shit to his wife.”
 Hunter shouts into the mic.

Jumping down
from my kit, I toss my sticks into the crowd, exiting the stage with my brother.
 Daisy smiles bumping both our fists once we reach her. “Good show you
guys.  Henry just told me that Abby wants a word with all of us after the
show; don’t disappear on me.” She says, glaring at Hunter.

Clutching his
chest, Hunter winks at her. “Who me?  You could never get rid of me baby
momma.  My love runs deep for you.” Walking over, he wraps an arm around
her and kisses her cheek with a sloppy smack. “One day, you’ll let me show
you.”

Ignoring Hunter,
Daisy watches Gray sing for her.  Every word of ‘
Your Arms Feel
Like
Home
’ by 3 Doors Down, has her completely consumed.
 Every word, every note he plays, speaks only to her.  It’s an
intimate act for them.  It’s really fucking hot, like foreplay without
even touching.  He communicates his love and devotion to her in front of
thousands.   Every feeling in his mind, body, and soul poured out in
a song.  Only for her.

My chest aches,
reminding me of what I had, of all that I gave up.  Bile rising in my
throat as realization sets in of what I’ve done.  All this time I’ve been
angry at Camaron for not being strong enough to fight for me.  For us.
 But I gave up on her.  Why?  Because it just got too hard.
 Now nothing but random pussy throwing themselves at me fills my nights.  No
connection and no ability to love anyone else.

Facing and
admitting that Cam was flawed was one thing.  Facing myself and my
weaknesses is another.  I complained that she wouldn’t let me in, but who
have I let in?  I can count on one hand how many people know the darkest
things dwelling in my broken soul.  But, not one of them were told
anything by me.  I don’t speak the words, they would consume me if I did.
 

Hunter pats my
back, pulling me back to the here and now, “Night two of my ‘
Dom Style
Lovin’ Lessons’
start after we leave here dick drip.  She’s gonna be
waitin’ for us in your hotel room.  Naked.  In.  Your.
 Bed.”

I nod and force
a smile.  Distraction.  That’s exactly what I need right now.
 The fact that Hunter is enjoying my exploits a little too much isn’t lost
on me.  I know I shouldn’t let him get away with planning random pussy for
me either but I shake it off for now.  Gray exits the stage just in time
to catch Daisy as she launches at him, covering his face in kisses.  Once
she lets him go we all head back down the ramp, a united front to meet Abby in
the staging room.     

In the staging
room, Abby sits alone, holding a glass in her hand. “Hi Abby, I hope you
weren’t waiting too long.” Daisy says, sitting on the sofa between Gray and me.
 Hunter sits on the arm of the chair.

“Nope, just got
here.  I left everyone to finish the show so that we could talk alone and
maybe save pretty boy here from another shot to the junk.” She teases, winking
at Hunter. “Now, I want to discuss bringing Shaft to Ironsound Records.  You
don’t have an album out yet, that’s something that needs to be done ASAP.
 Also, we have a huge outdoor concert we are trying to put the finishing
touches on that I want to show you off at.”

The four of us
must look crazy as hell because she stops and leans up in her seat. “You guys
need to fuckin’ breathe.  This is a good thing.  Everything will move
fast once we get you into the office to sign the final contracts, but you’ll do
fine.  We’ll talk in a few days, Daisy.” Standing, she shakes all our hands
then leaves the room.  

Hunter’s smile
is nearly cracking his face.  Cunter’s looking more like Heath Ledger as
the Joker right now and it’s freaking me out. “Did I just get picked up by Abby
Irons?” He shouts, jumping on the coffee table.

“Um, let her husband
hear you say that dumbass, or do you want your ass beat?” I bite out with a
laugh.

“Shaft just
agreed to sign with Ironsound Records!  This is fucking awesome!”
 Hunter shouts, jumping down and swinging Daisy in circles. “Oh, honey,
hold me!” He coos, making her giggle.

“Take that
Jackoff.” I whoop, bumping Gray’s fist.

“Let’s go
celebrate.” Gray says when Hunter finally releases Daisy.

Hunter swallows
hard, “I don’t think so. Um, you two go celebrate however you want.” Clapping
me on the back he arches a brow. “My brother and I are late for a gang bang of
epic proportions.  
It’s
tits and ass for
everyone, you guys can come too!  It’s a fuckapalooza!”  Shaking his
ass, Hunter starts dancing around the room. “Fuck me baby, one more time!”

“Um, no, I think
we’ll have to pass on that.” Gray tosses out, grabbing Daisy’s hand.

Henry walks in
grinning, passing Daisy and Gray on their way out, “Yo, Big Man,
the
bitch all ready to go?” Hunter asks, grabbing his guitar
case.

“If you mean
Katheryn, then yes.  She’s at the hotel waiting, thanks to the very
discreet concierge who asked no questions when it came to why he was helping a
woman into your room so she can get naked.” Henry shrugs. “Money greases all
wheels.”

“Speakin’ of grease?
 Are we good on supplies?” Hunter asks, looking at me.

“I never leave
home without lube and a few wraps brother.  I’m always prepared.” I quip,
following Hunter out of the room. “Although, if Henry wants in on this chick…
 I don’t think I have any big enough for what that big fucker’s packin’.”
Henry turns to face me, arching his brow.

“Let me educate
you.  I’m packin’ serious fuckin’ meat heat.  I don’t use condoms;
have to wrap my shit in car covers.” He says matter of fact. “That way the
beast has breathin’ room.”      

“While you were
too busy being the one pussy tapper, you missed out on a lot of fun.
 Henry and I are a hell of a team.  I bang ‘em then he tears in and
we have to hang the bitches up to dry after.”

“Let’s go before
she fucks the bedpost and leaves all three of us hanging.” I murmur when we
reach the ‘Burban. “Daisy and Gray take a cab?” I ask, stretching out in the
back seat.

“Yep, I think
they’re anxious to get celebrating.” Henry replies, pulling out of the parking
lot.

“So am I.”
Hunter and I say in unison.  Closing my eyes, I prepare myself for
tonight.  My heart doesn’t want this, but my body needs it.  Looks
like I’ll be fuckin’ Cam out of my system for the
rest
of my life.  Every piece of ass is her in my mind and in my heart.
 If I can’t really have her, I’ll sure pretend with every random pussy my
brother can find.