Falling Stars (17 page)

"It
will all be okay. We will get through this together, as a family."

"It's
my fault," I whispered. She squeezed me tighter. "I hurt her."

She
hugged me close and pulled my head to her chest, her heartbeat thumping wildly
in my ear.

"How
long have I been here?"

"Just
the night," she sniffed. "You’ll come home with me and I will take
care of you."

Fuck,
why couldn’t the doctors kept me under until the nightmarish anniversary was
over.
Then a thought halted my musings.

"Is
Stacia...?" I couldn't get the rest of my question out of my mouth.

"She's
okay." Her hand ran through my hair.

My
doctor eventually arrived and reluctantly released me from the hospital; however,
since my physical injuries were more superficial and I'd not tried to commit
suicide he had no choice. They made sure to give me their
professional
advice
as well as to talk to Nicholas and Gwen before I signed my release
papers.

We
were riding in a tension-filled car until Gwen broke the silence.

"I
think he should come home with me for a while. You can cancel the tour."
She waved it off as if it were no big deal to cancel a major tour. Nicholas had
a look of amusement on his face.

"Gwen,
I don't know what we're going to do right now, but we'll talk about it."
He looked to her briefly. She pouted. "It is a wonderful idea though."
He reassured her.

"Can
you not talk about me as if I'm not here?" I exclaimed. "Look, I know
I fucked up –"

"Christopher,
watch your mouth." Gwen scolded.

"Sorry.
I know I messed up, major, but I don't want to cancel the tour. It's not fair
to everyone else." I argued.

"I
don't think it's –" Nicholas interrupted Gwen before she could finish her
argument.

"Christopher
I can't agree to that. How do I know you won't do this again?" He looked
at me with pain in his eyes.

"I
won't hurt anyone," I tried to reassure them.

"What
about yourself, Christopher? I'm concerned about you." Nicholas spoke
sternly.

I
put my head back on the seat not knowing what to say to convince him. My mind was
scrambling for something I could bargain. Finally, my mental search came
through. I realized what would convince him and internally groaned. I couldn't
believe I was going to do this. Squeezing my eyes, my jaw tightened. I spit it
out before I came to my senses and changed my mind.

"I'll
do whatever you want. I'll agree to get help." Pulling my head up, I
looked at both of them. Gwen looked like she were going to cry again and
Nicholas looked as if something was stuck in his throat.

"Christopher
–"

"Of
course I'll have some stipulations."

He
eyed me with suspicion.

"And
what are those?" He demanded.

"I
will not be doped up all day. If they want me to take the pills to sleep, then
fine I'll do that, but I won't take pills all day."

"And?"
He asked.

I
hesitated.

"A
couple of things, though one is probably unlikely." I shifted nervously in
my seat and swallowed hard.

"Continue…"
He urged.

"I
will not go lie down on some head shrink's couch to talk about my feelings. I'm
not saying I won't talk to someone, but I don't want some stupid ass head
doctor making me lie down and discuss my 'mommy issues'" I looked at Gwen
who was scowling at me.

"Sorry
for swearing." She let a small smile sneak up on her lips.

"And
the other request?" Nicholas raised his eyebrow.

Taking
a deep breath, I bit the bullet.

"Mia,"
I looked him straight in the eye.

Chapter
Ten

"What
about Mia?"

Nicholas
sat up straighter and looked at me as if he was ready to pounce. Glancing
quickly at Gwen I noticed a small smile on her lips.

"It's
not like that." Quickly I corrected Gwen's unspoken assumptions. She just
nodded and her smile transformed to a smirk. Clearing my throat, I turned my
attention back to Nicholas. He was still eyeing me up and was winding up for
the attack.

"Don't
let her leave the tour." I said with my eyes cast down. "I've been an
asshole and after everything, especially after last night, I'm sure she…that
Hushed
Mentality
is about to pull out."

"Christopher,"
His shoulders relaxed and the tension in his jaw slackened.

I
braced myself for him to tell me that it was too late.

"I
don't believe they're going anywhere."

Looking
up at him, his lips turned up in amusement.

"Mia
is stronger than you give her credit for. To be quite honest, I don't think
even your asshole behavior could have run that one off."

I
rubbed the back of my neck and Nicholas chuckled.

"I
think you have finally met your match."

Gwen
covered her mouth to try to stifle a giggle.

"I
think you're right." I breathed out.

Putting
my head back onto the seat, I closed my eyes again. Thinking back over the time
we'd been on tour and all of the interactions with Mia on the tour bus and the
hotel.

When
the car stopped in front of the studio, I was a bit surprised. I was sure he
was going to take me straight to the hotel or even take me home.

"I'll
be right back." Nicholas spoke and quickly stepped from the car.

I
followed him.

"Christopher
you don't have to come in. We can head back to the hotel. I just need to check
on a couple of things with Una."

"Una's
here?" I was a little confused. Looking at my watch, it was almost five.

Why,
the fuck, did I just look at the time? Have I learned nothing by now?

Composing
myself quickly before Nicholas could see any falter in my demeanor.

"Yes.
The girls are here recording." He looked at me cautiously. Obviously I
hadn't pulled myself together as quick as I thought.

"I
want to go in."

"Christopher,"
Gwen got out of the care without me noticing, "I think it's best to wait
here."

"I'm
going in." I walked through the entrance.

Once
inside, I let Nicholas lead the way to the studio they were using. We walked in
during the middle of recording.

"Hey
Christopher," Albert slapped the hand I extended to him. "These girls
are good." He nodded toward the booth where the girls were playing.

Mia
was singing into the microphone. It was a song I hadn't heard and it was little
different from what I had heard them play. When I didn't answer him, he
questioned me.

"Don't
you think so?"

"Huh,
yeah, they're good." I took a seat next to him as he recorded the track.

There
she was, behind the glass. Her eyes were on Kat as they harmonized. Al's voice
pulled my attention back to him.

"Well
since you're here, do you want Mia to record the lyrics to the song you sent to
me a few days ago?"

I
hesitated before I answered.
Would she want to?

"Yeah,
let's do it."

Nicholas's
hand went on my shoulder.

"Christopher,
don't you think we should get going to the hotel?" His grip tightened.

"If
Mia is willing to record this then I would like to be here for it." My
words were slightly acidic. I shrugged his hand off my shoulder.

Una
leaned forward, pressed a button, and put her mouth to the microphone.

"You
guys did great! Are you happy with it?"

"Yes,
Definitely, Absolutely" they answered at the same time.

Una
gave me a quick glance before she spoke through the mic again.

 "Mia?"

She
turned around.

 "Yeah?"

Her
eyes were my immediate focal point. The haunting pools of dark chocolate drew
you in and made my skin crackle. There was the allure and a new ache in my
chest. Una's voice broke the invisible lure.

"We
need to record your part for the duet with Christopher, are you ready to do
that? I mean are you prepared?"

Mia
nodded and put a bottle of water to her lips. Her mouth puckered as she pulled
the water bottle from her lips. Licking my lips and swallowing hard, my lower
body awakened.

"Okay
we're going to get set up for it, take ten." Una pulled away and looked
directly at me, pulling me from my oral fixation. "How are you?"

Christ,
here we go with all the well-being questions. I hate them. I know I did it to
myself, but fuck people. They didn't know when to leave things alone. The booth
door opened and I spun in my chair.

Kat,
Laney, Serena, and then Mia emerged. Each one looked at me with wide eyes as
they came through the door. I prepared myself for the looks of pity, fear, and
even anger. When Mia's eyes got to me, she smiled slightly and kept it
emotionless. She said something to Una I couldn't hear and walked out the
studio door. There was an urge to follow her, but I shook it off quickly. What
the hell was wrong with me?

"How
are you feeling?" I turned.

Laney
sat with her legs crossed, looking expectantly at me. Both Kat and Serena
stared at her as if their eyes were going to make a leap for the floor.

"Laney,"
Kat hissed.

"I'm
okay." I responded hesitantly.

"That's
good to hear." Laney turned her attention to Kat who had a hand on her
arm.

Kat
mouthed 'sorry' to me before she began hissing into Laney's ear.

"I
was being polite." Laney growled quietly, but not quite enough. I ignored
them.

Mia
came back and walked straight into the booth. She didn't take glance in my
direction once. She is probably pissed or most likely scared to death of me.
She should be. If she knew what I was, she would leave.

Isn't
that what I wanted though? Dropping my head in frustration and pinching the
bridge of my nose, I took a deep breath.

"Okay
Mia, you ready?" Albert's question brought my head back up.

"As
ready as I'll ever be." She winked at him. A twinge of anger flashed
through me.

The
song started to play and she began to sing. It was good, she was good, but
something was off. It wasn't working out the way I wanted it.

"Stop,"
I spoke so sudden Albert snapped his head to me.

"What?"
He choked out.

"Stop,"
I stood up. "It's not right."

"It
sounds good Christopher, she sounds great." He argued.

"It's
not her it's the arrangement, the song." I hit the mic button and killed
the music. "Mia, stop for a minute."

Walking
into the booth, I felt a twinge in my chest when she put a large amount of space
between us. She was afraid of me. Well that's probably for the best. I wasn't
safe or good.

Grabbing
the paper she had, I started changing things on it. I placed it back down in
front of her.

"Let's
try this again" I smiled.

She
looked at me puzzled before she walked over to look over to the paper.

"You
ready?" I asked.

She
nodded without looking at me. God, I wanted her to look at me.

"Al,
when you're ready sir." He nodded and cued the music.

Placing
the headphones over my head, I started my verse. Out of the corner of my eye, I
caught Mia looking at me. When she joined in it caught me off guard. Not
because she wasn't good, but she started into the song sooner than I'd written.

When
I glanced to her, she smiled. My verse finished and she started in on her solo.
Taking her lead, I started breaking in to small parts while she was singing. It
came so naturally, so easy, that for the rest of the song I closed my eyes and
got lost in it.

The
urge to look over at her again was strong. So, I looked. Her eyes closed and she
swayed. The format of what we’d written was no longer. We were singing freely
with each other and it felt amazing. When the music stopped, there was complete
silence in the booth and on the other side of the glass.

Annoyance
set in, so I looked up through the glass to say something to Albert, but froze.
Everyone's eyes were on us. They were standing around Al and with mouths
parted.

Looking
to Mia who was staring back at them, she broke the uncomfortable silence.

"What
the hell are you staring at?"

I
laughed at her exclamation. She looked at me and smiled, and then looked back
to them.