Fantasyland 03 Fantastical (35 page)

Oh.

Right.

I did. I had a tiny porthole.

The banging came back as he bent and looked
through it then his head turned to me, his expression unreadable
then I stopped trying to read it when I heard Phoebe shouting,
“Cora! I know you’re in there! Open up! I don’t have all day.”

Phoebe!

My heart started racing.

She’d called last night. Now she was
here.

I didn’t know whether to be terrified, happy
or to brace.

My eyes refocused on Tor just as he unlocked
the door, pulled it open and when he did, I decided my best option
was to brace.

Then I saw my petite, dark-pixie-cut-haired,
adorable-faced, gorgeous platform pumps with skinny jeans and
kickass sweater wearing friend standing at the door, one hand
raised ready to knock again, one hand holding a department store
bag by the handles, body arrested and head tipped way back with
mouth falling right open when she caught sight of Tor.

Oh boy.

She blinked then her eyes did a top-to-toe
scan. They stopped on the way back to the top, arrested on his
chest, she blinked again and I had a feeling she also started
salivating (I had this feeling because that was what I did when I
saw Tor’s chest) then her eyes slid all the way up, they moved over
his face then she whispered, “Dude. What happened to you? You
didn’t have a scar the last time I saw you.”

Oh boy!

“Phoebe,” I said cautiously, moving into my
living room and her head jerked my way, her eyes lost their wonder
and her face instantly closed down.

My heart clenched and I stopped moving.

I’d been right to brace. Cora had done
something to her.

Really, really, God,
really
, I hoped
I
never
met that
awful
woman!

She opened her mouth to speak but Tor got
there before her, shifting slightly but the movement was hard to
miss since he was a big guy but also because it was vaguely
threatening and Phoebe didn’t miss the movement or the vague
threat. Her head jerked back as her eyes cut to him and I watched
her body go still.

“You are clearly an acquaintance of my wife
and we are not unaware that others of her acquaintance are unhappy
with her, or, the
other
her. What
you
must be aware
of is that I will not tolerate you being unkind to her, that is to
say, the
real
her,” Tor declared, Phoebe blinked yet again
and I snapped, “Tor!”

He looked to me and asked, “What?”

I didn’t answer and this was because Phoebe
whispered a shocked, “Your wife?”

I looked from Phoebe to Tor, pointed to my
friend and said, “That’s what.”

“What’s what?” Tor returned.

“Your wife?” Phoebe repeated.

I walked three more strides into my living
room, stopped and planted my hands on my hips. “You can’t go around
telling everyone we’re married.”

Tor turned to me, crossed his arms on his
chest, tilted his head slightly but dangerously to the side and
asked back, “And why not?”

“Because it freaks them out!” I
semi-shouted.

“The other her?” Phoebe asked.

“Oh for goodness sakes,” I hissed, stomped
to the door, reached to Phoebe, grabbed her arm, pulled her in and
turned to her. Then I introduced my friend to my parallel world
husband, throwing my hand out from one to the other and back again
as I spoke, “Phoebe, my kind of husband, Tor, Tor, my hopefully
still best friend, Phoebe.”

Phoebe blinked again and asked, “Kind of
husband?”

“It’s a long story,” I muttered.

“I’m not her kind of anything,” Tor stated
at this point. “I am her husband and she is my wife and the mother
of my unborn child.”

Oh my God!

Phoebe’s eyes bugged out of her head.

I whirled and exclaimed, “
Tor!
”

“What?” he growled, losing patience.

“You also can’t go around telling everyone
I’m pregnant!” I cried.

“The little white stick said you were and I
knew
you were even before that contraption confirmed it so
why the bloody hell not?” Tor returned.

“You just can’t,” I shot back.

“You’re pregnant?” Phoebe whispered and I
turned back to see her face pale, her eyes still big and they were
on me.

“Uh… yeah,” I whispered back.

Her big eyes darted to Tor then back to me
then back to Tor then to me.

Then I knew she came to a decision (and not
a good one for me) when she straightened her shoulders and pulled
in breath as I watched her face close down.

Then she lifted up the bag and informed me,
“Dave said you were back. He also told me some stupid story about
how you had amnesia or whatever. Total soap opera but he bought it
because he’s a big dork. So, whatever. I’m here to return that
Coach bag and that blouse you loaned me. Then I’m gone.” She shook
the bag. “Here it is.”

I didn’t look at the bag; I kept my eyes
glued to my friend.

The other Cora had done something to her,
obviously, I just had no clue what.

And I also had no clue what to do to make it
better.

What I did know was that I couldn’t bear
thinking she was mad at me at all much less leaving her in this
world after whatever happened to me and Tor knowing she would
always hate me for whatever the other Cora did so I had to do
something.

“Take it,” she said, shaking the bag
again.

“She hurt you,” I whispered.

“All right, don’t take it,” Phoebe stated,
moved further into the living room, dropped it by my armchair and
hitched her purse up on her shoulder muttering, “Have a happy life
with your hot guy kind of husband.”

Then she started toward the door Tor had not
yet closed.

“His name is Prince Noctorno Allegro
Hawthorne. He’s of the House of Hawthorne, heir to the kingdom of
Hawkvale, ruler of Bellebryn,” I announced, Phoebe’s shoulders went
up her neck as I spoke, she stopped and slowly turned to face
me.

I kept talking.

What the hell? I had nothing to lose.

“Obviously, all this is in an alternate
universe that, evidence is suggesting, has the same people in it as
we have here but even though they look the same, they’re different.
I was transported there in my sleep two months ago and the Cora
from there was sent here. She’s a bitch, like, an all ‘round bitch.
She doesn’t discriminate with her bitchiness. She’s a bitch to
everyone, here and in the other world, Tor’s world. Everyone hates
her there but she’s had a lifetime of building that. It proves the
true strength of her bitchiness considering she’d been here for
just under two months and succeeded in making everyone hate
me.”

Phoebe stared up at me and said not a
word.

So I kept right on going.

“Anyway, we still don’t know what’s going on
but a quick update, I was transferred there and within minutes, I
accidentally started a curse that, if it comes to fruition, will
bring plague and famine to everyone in Tor’s land. Tor is married
to the other Cora but he hates her as in,
a lot
, so, since
this world-hopping business is about as usual there as it is here,
that is to say,
not at all
, he thought I was her so he
didn’t like me either. Obviously, since I’m now pregnant, he got
over that. Then we were both transported back here and we don’t
know why that is either. We also don’t know how to get back. What
we do know is that when we do, he’s divorcing her, marrying me and
I’m having his baby. So, I’m kind of his wife –”

“Cora,” Tor growled from behind me,
interrupting me and successfully expressing his displeasure at my
turn of phrase.

Therefore I hurriedly explained, “Though Tor
isn’t fond of the ‘kind of’ part and just considers us
hitched.”

Phoebe blinked. Then she looked up at Tor
and blinked. Then she looked back and me and when she didn’t blink,
I kept talking.

“So, as if uncertain travel between parallel
universes isn’t enough for us to deal with, the Cora of that world,
when she was in
this
world, was bitchy to all my friends,
including, obviously, you, and now they all hate me. She also left
my house and car a
total
pit, which was not nice but luckily
at least that was easily remedied. She also got herself into some
kind of trouble. We think playing poker. The Noctorno of this world
is a cop and he’s involved with her somehow. There’s a shitload of
money in my DVD cabinet and he’s, that is, the other Noctorno, or,
I mean, the Noctorno of this world is coming back to collect his
clothes sometime later. He can’t see my Noctorno,” I gestured
behind me, “mainly because he’d freak. And now we need to get back
to make sure the curse doesn’t befall Tor’s land and do it before
getting arrested or whatever.”

Phoebe said nothing, just stared at me.

I held her eyes and tried to read something
there, anything.

There was nothing. She was just staring at
me.

My heart lurched.

But my mouth whispered, “I know it sounds
crazy but it’s true. I can’t prove it except to point out the other
Noctorno you’ve seen doesn’t have a scar and my Noctorno does. So,
you might believe me if you saw both Tor and Noc together but I
can’t give you that so… well…” I threw out a hand. “I don’t know
what else to say. Except I hope one day, when you know I’m gone,
you’ll know I’m back there, with Tor, in his world, married to him
and making a family because I love him and you’ll know it wasn’t me
who hurt you but it
was
me who always loved you and I’ll be
missing you.”

She continued staring at me, unmoving,
unblinking.

I had nothing else to give.

Then she asked softly, “You’re
pregnant?”

“Yes,” I said softly back.

“With a hot guy’s kid?”

I pressed my lips together and tried not to
hope.

I couldn’t not hope.

I nodded and felt the tears stinging my eyes
as the hope clogged my throat.

Then I whispered, “In Tor’s world, I’m also
a princess, I can talk to birds and they talk back, the air
shimmers like there’s glitter in it and my clothes kick ass.”

Phoebe stared at me.

Then she asked quietly, “You love him?”

I pulled in breath through my nose and felt
Tor’s heat get close to my back.

Then I nodded.

Then suddenly she tipped her head back and
screamed at the ceiling, “
My best friend is knocked up with a
hot guy’s kid and she’s a princess in an alternate
universe!
”

Then she tipped her head down and launched
herself at me, bursting into tears, holding me tight and rocking me
violently from side to side.

I heard Tor close the door about half a
second before I also wrapped my arms around her, burst into tears
but mine were relieved as well as joyous.

We rocked back and forth crying for awhile
then she reared back, grabbed my forearms, shook them, her eyes
darting to Tor and back to me before she shouted, “Look at him!
He’s tall, hot, those scars are
way
hot, I’ve never seen
any
man wear pajama bottoms that well and he has just the
right amount of chest hair! Girl, you did
all right.
”

See! There was a reason Phoebe and I were
BFFs.

“Girl, I
know!
” I shouted back.

“Sweets,” Tor murmured from behind me and I
felt his hand warm on the small of my back before I twisted my neck
to look up at him, “you may wish to calm down and rejoice far more
quietly.”

“Sweets,” Phoebe whispered reverently,
“
hot.
”

I smiled at Phoebe’s words but my eyes
didn’t leave Tor’s face and I saw his eyes smile back before I said
to him, “Right. That would probably be prudent.”

“Right,” he replied, leaned in and touched
his mouth to mine.

“
Hot,
” Phoebe breathed and,
incidentally, didn’t let go of my arms.

Tor pulled back, his eyes slid to Phoebe and
back to me before he muttered, “I shall get dressed.”

Phoebe finally stepped away from me and as
she did so, she stated, “Please, if you’re doing that on my
account, I’m totally cool with you
exactly
the way you
are.”

Tor looked at her then he looked at me then
his mouth twitched, he shook his head, made no response and strode
to my bedroom.

Phoebe and I watched.

Then I heard Phoebe repeat a breathless,
“
Hot.
”

I looked at her to see she was looking at
me.

Then, as often happened, sometimes for no
reason whatsoever, we both dissolved into giggles.

And our giggles went uncontrolled when we
both heard muttered from my bedroom, “Bloody hell.”

In fact, at that, we collapsed into each
other’s arms and roared with them.

So much for being quiet.

* * * * *

I made my prince and my best friend
blueberry pancakes and bacon and we went overkill by following this
with red velvet cake.

But, whatever, it was time to celebrate. I
was in love with a hot guy prince and future king, pregnant with
his child and I still had my best friend. If that didn’t say
celebration, nothing did.

And furthermore, if there was a time I could
overeat, now was it.

While Tor showered, I filled Phoebe in on
more detail about Tor and she breathed the word “
hot
” or
drawled the word “
nice
” about seven thousand times while I
was doing it.

Then, while I cooked and we ate (standing up
in the kitchen with our plates close to our mouths, something else
that made Tor’s lips twitch), I filled Phoebe in with more detail
on everything else.

Then we retired to the living room.

Tor was dressed in jeans and a cool, light
blue shirt he didn’t tuck in, I was wearing my nightie with my
short robe tied over it and we were sipping after breakfast, after
cake coffee.