Far From Home (6 page)

I could feel his gaze on me as I sat with my back to him.  I was putting my clothes back on and as I was clasping my bra, I turned my head to glance at him.  He was propped up on his elbow, watching me, a satisfied smile spread across his face. 

“You’re blushing,” he said, sitting up and inching behind me as he wrapped his arms around my waist.  His body was warm and I nuzzled into his protective embrace.  It felt so right and I would’ve given anything if we could just stay in the moment forever.  He began tracing his fingertip along my shoulder before kissing it softly.  “I love you,” he said before kissing me again. “Are you okay?” His soft voice was laced with concern.

“Couldn’t be better,” I said, turning my body to face him.  He leaned back onto the blanket, pulling me on top of him.  My dark hair hung down on his chest and his arms clasped tightly around my waist. 

“You are so beautiful.”  His hand carefully reached up and stroked my hair.

“You always make me feel like I’m the most important person in the world.”

“That’s because you are.”

I felt my eyes growing warm and I laid my head on his chest as his fingers continued to trace lines up and down my back.  We stayed like that for a long time, not saying a word, until I finally rolled over and laid in his arms as we looked up into the night sky.  It couldn’t have been more perfect and I was glad we had waited to share this.  This is the way it should’ve been the first time.  This is who it should’ve been with the first time. But, like Jesse said, you can’t change the past.  I could only concentrate on the fact that we had found our way to each other.  I’d never forget my first time, but this would be the time I treasured. 

Chapter Five

I wasn’t surprised when Jesse showed up at my door first thing the next morning.  I hadn’t even changed out of my pajamas yet when I heard the knock.  I was sitting at the counter eating a bowl of Lucky Charms.  My mom had already left for her shift at the hospital and my grandma was out on her morning walk.

He looked almost shy when I opened the door.  His hands were stuffed in his pockets and I could tell he was nervous by the way he swayed subtly from his heels to his toes. 

“I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“No.” I grinned at him and suddenly I was nervous.  It was a good nervous, but still nervous.  Everything had changed between us, but as my eyes met his, I knew it was a good change. “I was just having breakfast.”

He followed me inside and shut the door behind him.  He looked around for a moment before noticing the stillness of the house.

“Where is everyone?”

“Mom’s at work and Grandma’s out walking.”

“So…” he said, his eyebrow raising and a half-smile forming on his face. “We’re alone?”

“We are,” I replied, smiling coyly back at him and it was as if the floodgates had been opened.  He didn’t wait for me to say another word before he was kissing me.  It was a hungry kiss that reminded me of last night.  A moment later, he had me pinned against the wall, his hands moving carelessly over my body and I became all too aware of how thin the cotton of my t-shirt was.  All I could think about was what we’d done the night before and how I wanted nothing more than to feel that again. 

His hands continued to move over my body faster than his lips and I couldn’t keep up with him.  His breath, warm and sweet, continued to pant over me and he suddenly stopped, eyes closed as his palms rested against the wall on either side of me.  I was trapped and I didn’t want him to let me go.  He was nearly out of breath when he finally opened his eyes.

“Why’d you stop?” I whispered.

“Because in another second, I wouldn’t have been able to.” His deep, husky voice washed over me and I reached out, wrapping my arms around his waist.  He encircled me in his embrace and he kissed the top of my head before we finally let go.  I took his hand and led him into the kitchen. 

The Lucky Charms were nothing but a soggy mess at this point and I dumped them into the sink before turning my attention back to Jesse, who was watching me with his arms folded across his chest and an easy smile on his face.  I felt my cheeks go red and just shook my head as I tried to hold back the happy smile fighting its way to my lips.

“Well,” I finally began. “That was quite the good morning hello.”

“Sorry about that.  I don’t know what came over me.”  He was still grinning in a way that told us both he knew precisely what had come over him. 

“You knew exactly what you were doing,” I said with a laugh and he shrugged his shoulders, but nodded.

“Perhaps I did.”

“You’ve never greeted me like that before,” I pointed out and his eyebrow rose again.

“Well…we’re doing a lot of things we’ve never done before.” 

The room grew silent and our eyes locked.  My heart was pounding and I knew his was too.  He wanted exactly what I wanted, but we both knew we couldn’t have it right now.  I knew I needed to do something to defuse the situation before we got ourselves into a position there was no turning back from.  There’d be time to be together again, but this was not that time.  I could never disrespect my grandmother’s house that way. 

“I’m gonna go take a shower.  Wait for me down here, okay?” I waited for him to make some sly remark about him joining me, but he didn’t.  He just nodded and I headed upstairs. 

I took a quick shower, but the whole time, all I could think about was being with Jesse again.  The night before had been everything I’d hoped it would be and the fact he’d seemed more eager to see me in the morning than I was to see him, reassured me that this time, it was all going to be different.  I shook my head, annoyed at myself for even thinking the experience with Jesse would be anything like the one with Alex.  Jesse had spent our entire friendship showing me how much he cared about me.  I guess I was just more wounded by the betrayal from Alex than I even realized.  I told myself I was okay and that I’d let it go and for the most part, I knew I truly had, but there was that small piece of my heart that still hurt and a speck of my brain that was always on the lookout for signs it might happen again, no matter how hard I tried to shut it off. 

Once out of the shower, I toweled off quickly and changed into a pair of cut-offs and a fitted white t-shirt, before running a brush through my long hair.  I didn’t bother styling it or putting any make-up on.  Jesse thought I was beautiful no matter what I looked like and I just wanted to get back to him.

He was sitting on the couch, flipping through the minimal channels on my grandma’s 19-inch TV when I got downstairs.  I joined him on the couch, snuggling up close to him as he draped his arm around my shoulder.

“I see you still haven’t convinced your grandma to upgrade the TV yet,” he laughed, finally just deciding to turn it off.

“I’m working on it, but she’s pretty set in her ways.”  I was tracing circles with my index finger on his chest, watching the little trails forming on his t-shirt.

The room grew quiet and he began playing with my hair while I continued to stroke his chest.  It was a comfortable silence and I closed my eyes for a while, listening to him breathe.

“I could hardly sleep last night,” he finally said and I opened my eyes.

“I slept like a log.  I was pretty beat after our escapades,” I laughed.  He did too, but only for a moment.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he continued. “I was worried.  I wish I could’ve stayed with you all night to make sure you were okay.”

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” I asked, sitting up Indian style so I could look at him. 

“I worried maybe you’d regretted it…I mean, after everything that happened this year.  I thought maybe you just told yourself you wanted it, but now, after what was obviously a good night’s sleep…” He stopped for a second, eyeing me knowingly before continuing on. “I thought maybe you’d changed your mind.  I thought you might be worried because of what happened…with him,” Jesse said reluctantly. “I didn’t want you to think I wasn’t going to be here for you.”

“And that’s why you came over so early,” I concluded and he nodded.  I took his hands with mine and I leaned in, kissing him tenderly. “And that is why I love you so much, Jesse Baylor.  Because you are nothing like him.”

He smiled and gently stroked my cheek before kissing it softly.  He stood up, reaching his hand down to me. I took it and he pulled me up.

“C’mon.  Let’s get outta here,” he said, encouraging me towards the door.

“Where are we going?  It’s only nine o’clock.”

“I don’t know and I don’t care, but I have to get outta here before I can’t stop myself from pulling off that little white shirt of yours and having my way with you in your grandmother’s house.  You know I’m too polite to do that, but those shorts you’re wearing are causing me to be at a dangerously low level of common sense and if I look down at those legs of yours one more time, I fear I may lose all control of my moral compass.”  We both started laughing and I followed him onto the porch and down the steps towards his Wagoneer. “Any suggestions?”

“How ‘bout the pond?  I hear it’s kinda secluded there.”  I gave him a wicked grin, which he just gave back to me and I suddenly felt him pulling me towards his Jeep even faster.

Chapter Six

Just like I’d told my dad, my goal after graduation was to find a job and save some money over the summer before leaving for K-State.   Jesse had already started working at his dad’s mechanic shop in town, so while he was gainfully employed, I sat around waiting for someone to call.  I knew jobs in Carver were scarce.  I swear I’d applied everywhere I could and I was beginning to lose hope when a flower shop downtown called for an interview.  I guess I nailed it because I got hired on the spot.  The owner, a middle aged woman named Jill, said I’d be arranging flowers, taking orders and even making deliveries.  It sounded easy enough and after spending the half hour in the shop during the interview, I doubted any job where you were surrounded by beautiful sights and smells all day with the sole purpose of making people happy could be bad, but still, I was nervous on my first day.  Jill said it was casual, so I decided on a nice pair of jeans and a black top. I pulled my hair back and after a bowl of cereal, I made my way to Main Street. 

When I walked inside, the bell on the door jingled and Jill poked her head out of the back.

“Mornin’, Riley!” she called to me. 

“Hi, Jill,” I said, walking over to her. “Where can I put my stuff?”

“Just set it there in the back.” She pointed to a back room and I walked over, putting my purse inside and then turned back to her. 

“You ready to get started?” Jill smiled warmly at me and I knew I was going to like her. 

“I am,” I said eagerly and she began showing me around the store.  There was more to learn than I expected.  I had never been known for my green thumb, and there was a lot to know in the flower care department.  Jill gave me a flip chart to help me get acquainted with the different flower varieties.  I obviously knew the basics like roses and daisies and tulips, but there were some I’d never heard of.  I decided I would tell Jesse he needed to start sending me bouquets of exotic flowers to help me learn. 

After spending the first couple of hours getting used to the store, Jill left to run a quick errand, leaving me in charge.  I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little hesitant at the thought, but Jill assured me she’d be back in a half an hour and that her son would be coming shortly, so if there were any problems, he could take care of it.  I breathed a little easier, but I was still a bundle of nerves when I heard the bell on the door stop jingling, signaling I was completely alone. 

We hadn’t had one customer all morning so I used the time to study my flip chart and get to know the different flowers.  In the middle of comparing the lily of the valley with an iris, I was startled to hear the door swing open.  I turned my head to see a young man walk in.  He couldn’t have been much older than me, but I didn’t recognize him from Carver High.  I may not have known everyone at school, but I was fairly certain I’d at least seen everyone and I was certain I’d never seen this guy before.  He was tall and lean, with an athletic build and his hair was nearly as dark as mine.  It was cut short, but it was a little wavy on top.  He smiled when he saw me and I wondered if he was Jill’s son.

“Can I help you?” I asked.

“You must be Riley,” he said and I nodded. “I’m Matt Campbell, Jill’s son.”

“Oh, hi,” I said, relieved it was him and not a customer.

“So, the place is still standing, which is a good sign.”  He smiled and I laughed a little at Matt’s joke. “How’s it going?”

“It’s going alright.  Your mom gave me this flip chart.  I’ve been trying to familiarize myself with the flowers and plants.  I think I’m making a little headway.”

“If you’re not into botany, what brought you to a job in a flower shop?”  Matt asked, walking past me.  He went behind the counter and started looking through a notebook.

“Money.  I needed a job and your mom was the first to offer me one.”

“What’re you saving money for?”

“College. I start at K-State in August.”

“K-State?” he asked and stopped writing in the notebook.  He looked up at me curiously and I nodded. “Manhattan campus?” Again, I nodded. “I’ll be a junior there in the fall.”

“Really?” I asked and I felt a smile spread across my face, knowing Matt could give me some pointers about the university.

“Third year psychology major.”

“So, will you be analyzing everything I say?” I asked and he started laughing.

“Uh…no.  You can rest easy.  I’m just getting into the core of the program so I’m not that knowledgeable yet, although I won’t make any promises that I won’t try.”

“Well, that’s good to know,” I said, turning back to my flip chart.  He finished up what he was doing, put the notebook back and started unloading some boxes in the back.

“You just graduated then?” Matt asked a while later and I nodded. “I don’t recognize you from Carver High.  I just graduated two years ago.  Did you go there?”