Fated (11 page)

The
photograph wasn't one of the ones I had seen in the review online, but it had
the same effect on me, made even more powerful by the fact that Caden was
standing next to me. I felt an ache between my legs and I had to resist the
urge to press my thighs together, not wanting to give away my state of arousal.
My nipples stiffened and I could feel them straining against the fabric of my
dress.

"What
do you think?" Caden's voice was low and closer than I expected, his
breath brushing against my ear. I looked up to find him leaning towards me, his
eyes gleaming with anticipation.

"You're
very talented," I said, trying to keep my voice even. "It's
very...raw."

I
forced myself not to jerk when Caden reached up to touch a wayward curl,
rubbing it between his fingers as if its texture fascinated him. I didn't want
him to know how much he affected me.

I
was finally able to breathe when he dropped his hand. Caden didn't comment as
he led me to look at photograph after photograph, not saying another word
except to the odd person who didn't get the message of his expression and came
up to him.

The
state of my arousal was at a dangerous level. I was finding it difficult to
take a full breath, and my lower body was tense from the pressure building in
between my legs. Caden was standing closer and closer to me, touching me every
time we drifted to another photograph in the guise of guiding me. I felt like
my heart was palpitating, unable to process the unmistakable desire in his
eyes. Any doubt I ever had in his interest in me fled with his actions tonight.

"Let's
get out of here." Caden's voice was low and raspy and I blindly let him
lead me through the gallery, barely aware of the words he spoke to people as we
passed by. The images of his photographs were rushing through my mind, his grip
on my elbow feeling like a manacle. I vaguely heard him call his driver on his
cell phone to tell him to pull up in front of the gallery.

The
cool air was like a slap to the face when we stepped outside, and I quickly
came to my senses. I had an idea of where Caden wanted the night to go, and I
was determined to not let it happen.

I was
about to speak when Caden's car pulled up and he ushered me in. The last thing
I wanted was to have this conversation in front of the driver, but it was more
private than hashing it out on the sidewalk.

I
took a deep breath as the driver pulled away, ready to make a stand. I was
prepared for Caden to make a pass at me, so I was surprised when he told the
driver to go to my apartment first. I cursed myself for feeling deflated,
telling myself I should be grateful.

I
was aware of his glances at me as we drove to my apartment, but I studiously
ignored them. But I couldn't outright ignore him when he spoke to me.

"What
did you think?"

"About
the party or your pictures?" I asked cautiously.

"Both."

"The
party was fine, I guess." I paused before continuing, choosing my words
carefully. "Your photographs are very powerful. I can see why you're so
acclaimed."

"I
don't want your damn compliments," Caden said irritably. "Tell me how
they made you
feel.
"

I
arched an eyebrow, praying that he hadn't been able to read my reaction to
them. "Isn't that the same thing as fishing for compliments? You want me
to say your pictures affected me? They did, in that I admired how you were able
to catch every nuance of your models' experiences."

Caden
made a sound of frustration but didn't say another word. I was glad for the
silence, the muffled sounds of the city outside making it bearable.

I
turned to Caden when we pulled up to my apartment. "Thanks for bringing me
home. I'll see you on Monday."

The
driver exited and opened my car door. I stepped out and thanked him, grateful
to be escaping Caden's overwhelming presence. My mouth fell open when Caden
followed me out of the car.

"What
are you doing?" I exclaimed, feeling a rush of heat warm my cheeks.

"What
does it look like I'm doing?" he replied dryly. He said a few words to the
driver I didn't hear, who then proceeded to get back in the car and drive off.
I watched the scene agape, unable to form a complete thought. I couldn't deny
that my pulse was quickening, a rush of anticipation making me feel giddy, but
I stamped down the emotion.

"Caden."
I tried to make my voice stern. "I don't want to have to tell you what's
appropriate and what's not appropriate again."

Caden
turned to me, walking towards me like he was stalking me. I made myself stand
my ground, although a part of me considered fleeing up the stairs before he
could reach me.

"Lauren,
I can see every emotion in your eyes. And right now they're telling me you're
lying."

I
tensed even more as he came closer, until he was so close that I could feel his
breath stirring the tendrils of my hair.

"You're
mistaken. I work for you. This can't happen. Even if I didn't work for you, I'm
not looking to get involved with anyone right now." My voice was breathy,
weakening the sentiment of my words.

"You
say
involved
like
it's a dirty word. We don't have to make it complicated. I want you, and you
want me. That's as simple as it gets."

I
wanted to protest, I wanted to push him away, but his gaze and words were
hypnotic. There was a heaviness to my limbs, making it impossible to run away
even if I had wanted to. But now I was being drawn to him, as if by an
invisible force, and all I could think about was how it would feel to have his
lips on mine.

I
didn't have to wait long as he lips gently caressed mine. I had expected him to
kiss me with bruising force, and his gentleness was my undoing. His lips nipped
at mine, and my mouth automatically opened as my eyes fluttered closed,
betraying every protest I had made.

Caden
wrapped one arm around my waist, pulling me towards him, as the other hand held
the back of my head. I could feel his arousal pressing into me, but he kept the
pressure of his lips light, not taking advantage of the silent invitation I had
given him by opening my mouth. He nibbled at my lower lip, and then he kissed
me languidly, like he had all the time in the world.

I
felt a rising impatience stir in me. His soft caresses left me aching for more,
and I stretched up on my toes to get closer, wanting to increase the pressure.
I wanted to groan in frustration when he refused to deepen the kiss, his lips
softly teasing me.

I
opened my eyes to find him watching me, his eyes glittering with desire. I
couldn't say what I wanted, to tell him that I was surrendering to my craving
for him. I couldn't express it in words, so instead I told him with my eyes and
body, pressing against him wantonly.

"You
want this," Caden growled before he leaned down. This time there was no
teasing as his lips crushed mine, slanting against my mouth with all the
passion that I had been longing to feel. I wrapped my arms around his neck, no
longer passive but an active participant of the kiss. I boldly pushed my tongue
into his mouth, reveling in his sound of approval as he laved his tongue
against mine. He dug his hand into my hair, pulling his fingers through it and
loosening all the bobby pins holding it up until it flowed freely down my back.

I
was lost, never having felt so aroused by a simple kiss. But then, there was
nothing simple about this kiss. Caden's tongue plundered my mouth, demanding
entrance, which I was more than eager to give. He devoured me like he was
starved for the taste of me, and I felt all my defenses slipping away. When he
pressed his erection into me, I eagerly pushed back, desperately trying to
relieve the ache that was rapidly growing.

I
lost track of how long we had been kissing, when I suddenly heard giggles. The
sound was like a bucket of cold water, and I pulled back abruptly, panting
harshly. Two teenage girls were passing by, and they gaped at us with wide
eyes, whispering to each other.

Panic
gripped me. I had been so undone by the kiss that I had forgotten we were
groping each other in public on a sidewalk, for the world to see. I felt
exposed and vulnerable, but I forced myself to meet Caden's gaze. He was
breathing as heavily as I was, his features etched with passion. His jaw
tightened when he reached out to grab me and I stepped back.

"This
is wrong." My voice barely registered, it was so strained. I cleared my
throat, trying to take a deep breath and get my head on straight. I spoke
louder. "We can't do this. If this continues, I can't work for you
anymore."

Caden's
lips twisted. "I wasn't the only participant in that kiss."

"I'm
not saying you were. You shouldn't have kissed me, but I'm partly to blame as
well. I didn't stop you, and I should have." I forced myself not to glance
away, although my embarrassment was making it hard to keep my gaze focused on
him. "I...I got carried away. It won't happen again."

He
didn't immediately reply. I felt like fidgeting under his steady watch, but I
forced myself to meet his gaze.

"Your
hair," he said in a low voice. "It's beautiful."

I put
a hand up to my hair self-consciously. Now that Caden had finally gotten his
way and pulled my hair out of its French twist, I was sure it looked like a
mess, curling wildly around my face.

I
dropped my hand as Caden's eyes flashed with desire. I felt a sudden jolt of
fear. Not fear for what someone as powerful and domineering as Caden could do
to me, but fear for what I would
allow
him to do to me. What I would beg him to
do to me.

"We
can't," I whispered, not caring about the desperation I heard in my voice.
I was surprised when he just nodded instead of arguing. He put his hands in his
pockets, as if he couldn't trust himself to not reach for me again. He stared
at me wordlessly, and I didn't know what else to do but escape.

"Goodnight,
Caden."

He
didn't respond, continuing to watch me as I fumbled with my key in the lock of
the front door. He waited until the door closed behind me and then walked off,
his shoulders hunched and his head down.

Chapter Eight

I spent
the weekend reliving every moment of Saturday evening, replaying every nuance
of the kiss until I felt like I was going to go crazy. I debated not showing up
on Monday, but that was the cowardly thing to do. I just didn't know if it was
possible to get past the kiss and act like everything was normal. How could I
face Caden and pretend like every fiber of my body wasn't aching for him?

I
tried to build an armor of moral conviction around me. After all, how clichéd
was it to get involved with your boss? I didn't intend to spend the workday
being chased around the desk. Besides, I didn't want to risk putting Macie's
job in jeopardy. I didn't have many friends, and she had been a constant in my
life since college. Although Macie didn't know everything about my past, she
knew I was slow to trust and cautious about making new friends. She had made a
concerted effort to keep in contact with me over the years, even during the
times when I had withdrawn, not returning phone calls and barely responding to
emails. I couldn't put her job in danger because I wasn't sure Caden wouldn't
blame Macie if I quit, and I was sure that would happen if Caden and I
continued along this dangerous path.

I
was given a reprieve of having to face Caden on Monday morning when I arrived
to an empty office. I hoped he wouldn't come in today, although I knew deep
down I was lying to myself. As much as I dreaded facing him, I craved his
presence as well.

I
frowned when I sat down and glanced at the vase of calla lilies on my desk.
They looked as fresh as the day I had bought them more than two weeks ago. I
had become suspicious a while ago because there was no way they could survive
for so long, but I couldn't actually believe that Caden was replacing them. The
meaning behind that was too dizzying to even contemplate. But I had sworn more
than once that the flowers looked slightly different.

I
checked all the flowers, looking for the blue pen mark I had made on Friday on
one of them. It was foolish, but it was the only way to get an answer because
there was no way I was going to ask Caden.

My
stomach fluttered in a combination of excitement and anxiety when I couldn't
find a flower with a pen mark on it. My mind was racing as I tried to come to
terms with what this meant.

Caden
chose that moment to enter the office, his eyes zeroing in on me as soon as he
stepped inside.

"Good
morning," I said, trying to keep up a façade of normalcy.

"Good
morning." His reply was measured as he walked up to me and sat down in
front of my desk. It took all my willpower to not glance at the flowers and
then back at him, because I didn’t want to let on that I knew what he was
doing.

Caden
took away any hope I had of sweeping everything that had happened Saturday
night under the rug when he spoke again.

"I
want to talk about what happened last Saturday."