Fear of Falling (2 page)

It made me nervous. Like,
really
nervous. So I tore my eyes away from his and nodded towards a HELP WANTED sign propped up on a high shelf. “You guys hiring?”

Blaine turned and looked at the sign before bringing those brown eyes back to me. “Yeah. Waitresses, line cooks. A bartender. Looking for work?”

“Maybe,” I shrugged before taking a sip of my drink while I surveyed the room. It was a good-sized place, and it was centrally located. But, it was virtually empty aside from a few bar patrons. “Did this place just open or something?”

“Nah,” he responded with a little shake of his head. The lock of hair fell farther into his line of vision, and much to my dismay, he swept it to the side, tucking it back into his cap. “Just got new management.”

Craig snorted and rolled his eyes before taking a chug of his beer. He turned his attention back to me and waggled his eyebrows. “So darlin’, where were we? Oh right…how about Puerto Rican? Mexican? I have to be close. Did I get it right? Or are you just gonna keep me guessing all day?”

Ignoring Craig completely, my gaze fell to Blaine’s hands. They rested on the bar, just inches from mine. On one hand, he had a letter written in some type of old script on each finger. The other had a design on the back that fused into the piece crawling up his arm. My eyes followed the vibrantly detailed pattern slowly, studying every line and curl. Even shrouded in ink, I could tell his arms were magnificently cut and defined with muscle. Muscles that flexed and quivered as he leaned against the bar, causing his biceps and shoulders to strain against his fitted, plain white t-shirt.

“So are ya?” Craig asked, intruding on my thoughts and pulling me away from the splendor of Blaine’s arms.

“Huh?” I sputtered, looking up with a doe-eyed expression and praying that neither of them had noticed my shameless gawking. They both chuckled, making me believe that my prayers had gone unanswered.

“Are ya a spicy Latina?” Craig asked as he leaned in closer, hoping to steer my attention to him.

I could feel my lips curve into a grimace, and I swallowed down the disgust I felt at that very moment. Without knowing what to do or say next, I looked up at Blaine, whose eyes were still trained on me, an amused grin on his face. Initially, my eyes widened as if to plead for help then settled into a dreamy stare. They wanted to continue their study of Blaine’s physique and I really couldn’t blame them. And who was I to deprive my peepers of the sexiest piece of man-candy they had seen in years?

Noticing the flash of desperation in my expression, his smile broadened, and he turned to Craig, releasing me from his compelling gaze. “As always, you’re way off, CJ,” he said, as he turned his body sideways to rest on an elbow. The move allowed me a better inspection of his torso, and revealed a chest and abs under the thin fabric that just begged for a tongue to trace each defined cut. The weight of his body supported by his elbow caused his bicep to stretch his shirt even more. I envied that damn t-shirt.

“How so, cuz?” Craig asked, pausing before bringing his beer bottle to his lips.

Blaine looked away from Craig to meet my eyes again, however, his gaze was different this time. Less playful and curious, and more… intense. Almost lustful. It held me on my barstool and refused to let me look away or even blink. It burned right into me, marking me in an uncanny way. His expression both disturbed and aroused me, and I couldn’t decide which I was more upset about.

“Well, first off,” he finally said, “she isn’t mulatto or even Hispanic. Look at her eyes…perfectly slanted and sexy. Soulful. And her hair… so dark and thick, slightly curled. Hair that beckons you to run your fingers through it from root to tip. Maybe even pull a little,” he smiled crookedly. “And then there’s the shape of her lips…how they dip and curve into a full pout. Lips that you can’t resist staring at for hours. Lips that beg to be kissed.”

Blaine chewed his bottom lip and narrowed his eyes, as they continued to scan every part of me that he had just so eloquently described. I was nearly dizzy from the breath I didn’t even realize I was holding.

“Asian. You’re part Asian, right?” he asked simply, no trace of seduction in his voice. His eyes no longer smoldered or emitted the fiery passion he had displayed just seconds before.

The switch in gears nearly made me fall flat on my face. Luckily, my roommate/girlfriend/savior strolled in and successfully diverted the attention from me. Every eye turned to witness the grand arrival of Angel Cassidy, dressed in too short cut-offs, a red tank that was suggestively torn and cut to reveal her plump breasts and lace-up black platform heels. She was the quintessential blonde bombshell that filled every guy’s fantasies. With her heart-shaped cherry lips, milky white skin and curves for days, she easily resembled a younger, edgier Marilyn Monroe.

I masked the disappointment of losing Blaine’s attention and gave Angel a wink. She strutted over to me, a hand on her hip, and gave me a wicked smile. She clutched the back of my head, tangled her fingers in my dark brown hair, and crushed her glossed lips to mine. A moan rumbled her chest as I pulled her body into mine.

It was the kiss heard ‘round the world. Well, ‘round the bar, anyway.

Other than a few audible gasps at seeing Angel’s pink tongue dart out of her mouth, Dive was completely silent as she flicked my upper lip before pulling away. The two guys before us each wore amused grins that screamed of lustful possibilities.

“Oh, hell yeah!” Craig exclaimed, breaking the deafening silence and smacking Blaine’s chest with the back of his hand. “Lesbians! Now
that
explains it!”

“How are you, baby?” Angel cooed, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear while gazing at me adoringly.

I matched her soft smile and placed my hands on her narrow waist. “Better now that you’re here.”

“Wow! Can you believe this, B?” Craig still rambled excitedly.

I turned back around on my barstool to assess Blaine’s reaction, which was unreadable if not indifferent. Good. Better for him, and everyone else, to see that there’s no chance with me. Not that I thought he was thinking that.

“Can I ask you ladies a question?” Craig chimed in. For once since meeting him twenty minutes before, I was glad for his intrusion. I had to stop looking at Blaine. I had to stop giving him the impression that I was interested. Because I wasn’t. I couldn’t be.

“Sure!” Angel piped up, sliding her arm around my shoulders and leaning into me.

Craig took a hefty gulp of beer and cleared his throat before leaning closer. “Ok. I know you gals are gay, and all, but
lez-be-honest
…you gotta miss that full, thrusting feeling,” he snickered in a mock whisper.

“CJ, dude!” Blaine scoffed, smacking him upside the head.

“Ever been with a guy?” Craig continued, ignoring Blaine’s pleas to knock it off. “Because I’d love to be the meat in your sandwich.”

With that, Angel and I rolled our eyes before making our way to an empty table. Blaine was still scolding Craig for his comments, and I honestly had to refrain from laughing. Craig was certainly an asshat, but I had to give it to him—he was a funny asshat.

“So what happened?” Angel asked once we were settled.

I shrugged and looked down at the table, digging my fingernail into a nick in the tabletop. “Same thing that always happens. I hurt him, he cried, then I came here.”

“He cried?” Angel grasped my hand, her sparkly black fingernails a drastic contrast to her pale complexion. “You wanna talk about it, babe?”

“No,” I replied, shaking my head. I hated that part of the game. Each time, I told myself I wouldn’t get involved—that I would be better off without the trouble. Yet, each time, I somehow let myself break the rules. Then came the pain.

Before I could delve deeper into my own self-inflicted misery, Blaine strolled up, giving me a clear view of the rest of his body. Worn blue jeans hung from his hips in that way that showed off his chiseled frame without being too tight. His plain white tee clung to his torso and, if I looked closely, I could see the outline of eight perfectly hard mounds, comprising his midsection. And, I could tell that there was more ink, arousing my interest even more. I forced my eyes back up to his, silently cursing myself.

“Hey ladies, sorry about my cousin. He was dropped a lot as a baby,” he said with a smile before crossing his arms in front of him and leaning against a nearby table. The movement caused those luscious biceps to bulge and, once again, that lucky-ass t-shirt stretched.

“Oh wow, you’re related to that tool?” Angel snickered. “My sincere apologies.”

“He’s an ass, but he’s harmless,” Blaine replied with a one-shouldered shrug and a crooked grin. The combination was incredibly adorable, and I had to squelch a rising swoony sigh. “So is there anything else I can get you ladies?”

As always, Angel commanded attention. “Well, handsome, we will have two shots of tequila to start.” She peered at my melancholy expression through dramatically long eyelashes. “Actually, make that four shots. Maybe I’ll get lucky,” she winked.

Blaine smirked knowingly before scraping his bottom lip with his teeth. Something inside me clenched. “Was I right?” he asked, suddenly directing his attention to me.

I frowned, completely caught off guard. “Huh?”

He uncrossed his arms and took a step forward, causing me to take in a sharp breath. “About your nationality. I was right, wasn’t I?”

“Um uh…” I stammered. I wasn’t entirely sure why I had suddenly lost my train of thought, but all I could focus on was that pesky lock of hair that was slowly easing its way from outside of his ball cap once more.

“Oh, Kami’s nationality?” Angel piped up, her eyes darting between Blaine and me questioningly. “Her mom’s from the Philippines.”

With his eyes never straying from mine, Blaine smiled crookedly and nodded. Then he turned away from the table, stealing my breath and taking it with him back to the bar to retrieve our shots.

“What the fuck was that about?” Angel squeaked in her high-pitched soprano. The crude comment was a direct contrast to her bell-chime tone.

After regaining the usage of limbs and brain function, I turned to Angel. “Nothing. He and his cousin were trying to figure out what I was.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get that… I’m talking about the obvious
Take me, take me now
stares. I mean, seriously, did it just get hot in here or what? I thought he was about to ask you to grab your ankles!”

I shook my head and looked down at my peeling nail polish. “No, you’re seeing things. Besides, I’m not going down that road again. I’m done.”

“Sure, sure, sweetheart. Whatever you say. I love you anyway,” she grinned, blowing me a kiss and eliciting a chuckle from me. “There’s that smile!”

Just as I was beginning to unwind, Blaine returned with a tray of shots, lime slices, and salt. With one extra. He distributed our four, then picked one up for himself, raising it in a toast. Angel looked to me with a wicked gleam and picked up the saltshaker. She leaned over, then seductively licked my neck and sprinkled a little salt on it. Feeling satisfied with my compliancy, she eased a lime wedge between my lips and picked up her shot glass. My eyes fluttered closed when her small hands cradled my face and sucked the salt from my neck, licking and nuzzling as if we were alone in the room. Then she pulled back, clinked her glass against Blaine’s, and downed her poison. For the second time today, her lips pressed against mine, as they sucked the wedge of lime.

Blaine didn’t even bother with his own slice; he was too busy staring at the girls practically making out in front of him. From a few yards away, I could hear Craig catcalling and cheering, yet Blaine was silent, a small smile playing on his perfect lips. It made me wonder if he was just being respectful or was gay himself.

“Ok, your turn, Kami!” Angel exclaimed. With a sigh, I nodded and began to make my way towards her neck when she grasped my shoulders, halting my approach. “Not me, silly!
Him
. He doesn’t have another shot, and I want to take the next one with you. Don’t worry, I won’t get jealous.”

My eyes instantly whipped to his furrowed brow, both our expressions full of surprise. “Um, Angel, honey, I think that is highly inappropriate. There’s no way I could do something like that to him. He works here.”

Blaine licked his lips and cleared his throat. Somehow it sounded more like a groan. “I don’t mind if
you
don’t, Kami,” he said. My name sounded different on his tongue, almost dirty. The delicious kind of dirty.

I bit my bottom lip, and glared at Angel, knowing exactly what she was up to. She made everything into a game and was always looking for ways to be entertained. That attitude was embedded in her poor-little-rich-girl persona. She returned my evil eye with a wink and waved her hand towards Blaine.

Not feeling nearly drunk enough, yet warm from my previous drinks, I rolled my eyes and returned my attention back to the deliciously tattooed bartender before me. “Um, ok. I guess.”

Blaine smiled sheepishly before pulling up a chair and straddling it backwards. Now he was closer to me, so close that I could smell him. And I’ll be damned if he didn’t smell amazing. It was a mix of mint and spicy cologne that paired with his body’s natural scent in a way that made my mouth water. I silently cursed again, but directed it at Angel this time. I should have never smelled that man. It was wrong. So, so wrong. Yet so, so good.

I mustered up my courage and inched towards him slowly. Blaine kept his eyes on mine, refusing to even blink in my pursuit. I knew he had to hear my heart nearly pounding through my chest; hell, it was all I could hear. His gaze never wavered. When I was only inches from the smooth, tanned skin of his neck, he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and tilted his head, giving me full access to the known erogenous zone. By this point, my heart was hammering double time, and I thought I might go into cardiac arrest at any second. I had to keep going. I couldn’t let him see just how much he affected me. Angel and I had done this plenty of times with guys way less good-looking. This man should be no exception.