Read Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot Online
Authors: Annie Sprinkle Deborah Sundahl
Now that you know where the G-Spot is located you need to know how to stimulate it properly in order to help your lover experience a G-Spot and/or an Ejaculatory Orgasm.
How To Stimulate Her G-Spot or GSA
Now that you know where the G-Spot Area (GSA) is located you need to know how to properly stimulate your partner's G-spot. In order for your partner to fully enjoy stimulation of her G-spot or GSA she will need to be highly aroused or even have had one or more orgasms already and I will talk about stimulation in both situations. This is where many men make the mistake of stimulating the GSA too soon or with too much pressure too soon, which can make the experience uncomfortable for your partner and that is the exact opposite of your desired result.
GSA Stimulation Manual Strokes
There are several different strokes that you will be using to stimulate your partners G- spot and GSA with your fingers. As you read below do the strokes in the air with your fingers and visualize them. Or practice on your other hand by turning that hand palm down and make a loosely closed fist to simulate a vagina and insert your fingers into the opening between your thumb and index fingers. This will help you to understand the strokes better.
Light Strokes
The first stroke you will use is either this one or the one below. With this stroke you will also use very light pressure with the pad of your finger. But the stroke is a forward and backward motion following the contour along the GSA vagina to her G-Spot located right behind her pubic bone. You do this very slowly and gradually increase the pressure. Then move to the stroke below.
Light Circles
With light circles you will very lightly rub her G-Spot with very light circles with the pad of your first, middle or index finger. Then you will very slowly and gradually increase the pressure and after a few minutes you will add a second finger.
Press & Release
In this stroke you press firmly on her G-Spot with the pads of either your first two or middle two fingers from the first joint all the way to the third joint. So that you are using the entire surface of the under side of your fingers, just as if you were making a bar chord playing the guitar. Hold the pressure for 10 seconds and then release for 10 seconds and then repeat. Do this several times every once in a while to break up any routine and keep the stimulation from becoming routine.
Firm Strokes
If you have already been using one of the techniques above you can move right in to this stroke. This is basically the same as the “Light Strokes” motion above except this time you are using firm to very firm strokes. Using either your first two or middle two fingers you slide your fingers along the contour along the GSA vagina to her G-Spot located right behind her pubic bone. Stroke firmly back and forth. She must be already very aroused for this stroke to be pleasurable otherwise the firmness of the stroke could cause discomfort. Another variation is to part your fingers slightly while doing the stroke and massage on both sides of the G-Spot, which may be more comfortable for her because you are not pressing directly on her urethra. Try it both ways and see which she prefers.
Come Here Stroke
After you have warmed her up with one of the other strokes you can start to use this stroke. With either your first two or middle two fingers inside your partners vagina you bend your fingers toward you making a “come here” motion like if you were motioning for someone to come toward you. With each stroke you will run your finger along on the front wall of the vagina massaging the GSA and G-spot. Try shallow and deep strokes covering different areas along the GSA to see what your partner likes best. Also try different variations of speed. Start slow and then slowly speed up as your partner gets closer to orgasm.
Tapping the G-Spot
This is very similar to the motion above but while you are making the “come here” motion you also move your hand up and down very fast. Your goal is to firmly tap her G- Spot with your finger tips/pads while you are moving your hand up and down stimulating the entrance of her vagina.
Hitting the G-Spot
In this stroke you are sliding your fingers in and out and hitting her G-Spot or GSA with the soft pad/tips of your fingers with each stroke. Aim your fingers at the GSA not just straight in and out. This is a moderate to fast stroke.
Vibrating Stroke
With this stroke you are combining the “Come here Stroke” and “Tapping the G-Spot” but you are making very short and quick movements, not the full strokes like in the other two. Your movements should be so short and fast that your hand is actually vibrating.
You will then be hitting her G-Spot/GSA with small vibratory strokes. Your hand and arm will get tired pretty quickly. So this is not the first stroke to use, but better for late in the game. Another way to use this technique is the variation below the “Pulse Stroke” which will enable you to use this vibrating stroke for longer periods of time longer.
Pulse Stroke
This is the same stroke as above except that you pulse it for 3-4 stokes and then pause for 1-2 seconds and then pulse another 3-4 strokes. Repeat this for as long as you and your partner desire. This pulsing will feel very good to her and also let your hand and arm rest for a few moments so that you can continue this stroke for a while. If she is about to cum you might then move to the “Vibrating Stroke” for continuous stimulation while she is having her orgasm or ejaculating.
spot Stimulation as part of foreplay
Using G-spot stimulation as part of foreplay before intercourse is probably the most common method and is also one of the most fun for both partners. It really gets the women ready for intercourse and at the same time you can give her a powerful orgasm and the whole idea of stimulating her with your hand is very playful by nature.
In this technique we concentrate on building arousal and teasing and then the slow and gradual stimulation of the G-spot rather than clitoral or combined stimulation. Now as you read the steps below I want you to imagine yourself doing each step to your lover or a woman of your choice so that your mind will accept this as part of your library of sexual techniques and it will become second nature to you.
So here are the steps one by one for manual stimulation alone :
(You will start off in the position in figure 4.) Start off with a lot of passionate kissing. Women often complain that men don't kiss them enough especially after they have been with them for a while in a relationship. You can never go wrong with long passionate, probing kissing.
Learn how to give her a sensual massage. At least caress every inch of her body with long soft strokes. She will love you for this. Kiss and taste every inch of her body except her vagina. Kiss her neck, breasts, tummy etc...
Spend allot of time touching and stroking her inner thighs. But don't touch her vagina yet! You want to tease her and build up the anticipation.
After a few minutes of this teasing, gently rest the heel of your hand right above her pubic hair on her pubic bone and cup your hand over her vagina. Don't touch her yet but get your hand so close that she can feel the heat from your hand. During all of this you should be next to her kissing her on the mouth or kissing and sucking her breasts and nipples.
Now take your hand and put two fingers on each side of her vagina (you will have to spread your fingers where you have your 1
st
and 2
nd
fingers on one side and your 3
rd
and 4
th
on the other side) and gently and slowly rub the whole area in a circle clockwise Do this for 2-3 minutes.
Spread her vaginal lips apart by spreading your fingers apart and then bring your fingers and her vaginal lips back together again. Do this as you continue to rub in the circular motion that you started in step. Do this until you can feel her wetness seep through to your fingers.
Put your middle finger right on the opening of her vagina and slowly and gently tease and rub around the edge of the opening.(You are still next to her kissing her and sucking her nipples at the same time) Continue teasing her in this way. Ask her if she likes it or tell her that you love to touch her as you continue to do this.
Very slowly insert your finger in to her vagina about ½" and continue the circular motion for a minute or two. (make sure before do this that your fingernails are trimmed and filed and don’t have any sharp or jagged edged. Or you will hurt her and ruin the whole process!)
Slide your finger in deeper to her G-spot (Remember how to find it from above). And slowly massage the area in a small circle with very light pressure (About the same pressure that you would apply chap stick or lip balm to you lips with your finger.)
After a few minutes of this she will really start moving and you will see that she is very, very turned on. At this point you can increase the pressure slightly. And continue the stroke.
You should now add a second finger either your 1
st
or 3
rd
which ever you prefer. And continue the motion for 1-2 minutes.
Now you will add in three other strokes to the technique. In the 1
st
stroke you will use both of your fingers and curl them back toward your palm stroking the top wall of her vagina and the GSA area right behind the pubic bone. You should start off with the same pressure that you have been using and you can use more pressure once she is very aroused!
In the 2
nd
stroke you will hook your fingers around her pubic bone and put pressure directly on her G-Spot (remember it’s about the size of a dime or nickel
and will feel a little rougher in texture than the surrounding area) and make a in and out vibration type of movement keeping the pressure on her G-Spot.
The 3
rd
stroke is very similar to the first but instead of curling your finger toward your self for the movement you will keep your fingers hooked around the pubic bone and your fingers will keep constant pressure on her GSA, but you will also slide your finger tips back and forth over the entire GSA and in and out of that nook where your have your fingers hooked around the pubic bone.
Start with the first new stroke and try that for a minute or two. Ask her how it feels to her, then try the second stroke and the third. See which one she feels the best to her. And continue with one of the 4 strokes you now have learned. Alternatively you can use the
GSA Stimulation Manual Strokes
in the order that you learned them in the last section.
Continue the stimulation. You may at this point may begin to feel deep muscle contractions in her vaginal walls and you may also feel her vaginal muscles tighten around your fingers. This is a good sign an means she is on her way to a vaginal orgasm. Alternately you may feel her vagina get looser and balloon outward and get very wet suddenly this is also a signal that she is approaching a G-spot or vaginal orgasm and possibly even a ejaculatory orgasm.
At this point she is only a few minutes away from a very powerful deep vaginal orgasm. It could be anywhere from another 2 minutes to 20 minutes. So keep up the stimulation and also talk to her and tell her how much she turns you on and tell her to cum for you, and how beautiful she is. Her mind is the most powerful sex organ she has so you should stimulate her mind as well by talking to her. If you know that she likes to talk dirty then this is the perfect time for that.
At this point all you can do is to continue what you have been doing so far. Her orgasm is on the way. She may or may not ejaculate when she has her orgasm, and ejaculation should not be your goal. Your only goal should be for you to bring her as much pleasure as possible and to share that with her.
Stimulation of the G-spot During Oral Sex:
In this technique you are going to stimulate her orally at first and then add G-spot stimulation with your fingers while you stimulate her clitoris with your mouth. You will still want to start with the extended foreplay even before you go down on her.
Once again you will start off in the position in figure 4. Start off with a lot of kissing. Women often complain that men don't kiss them enough especially after they have been with them for a while. You can never go wrong with long passionate, exploring kissing.
I suggest that you learn how to give her a sensual massage. At least caress every inch of her body with long soft strokes. She will love you for this. Kiss and taste every inch of her body except her vagina. Kiss her neck, breasts, upper and lower abdomen etc…
Spend a lot of time touching and stroking her inner thighs. But don't touch her vagina yet! You want to tease her and build up the anticipation for your touch there.
After a few minutes of this teasing, gently rest the heel of your hand right above her pubic hair on her pubic bone and cup your hand over her vagina. Don't touch her yet but get your hand so close that she can feel the heat from your hand. During all of this you should be next to her kissing her on the mouth or kissing and sucking her breast and nipples.
Take your hand and put two fingers on each side of her vagina ( you will have fingers split where you have your 1
st
and 2
nd
fingers on one side and your 3
rd
and 4
th
on the other side) and gently and slow the rub the whole area in a circle clockwise Do this for 2-3 minutes.
Now move down between her legs and slowly and sensuously kiss and lick her calves one at a time and slide your tongue up the inside her leg.
Lift up her legs one at a time and kiss, lick and gently suck the area on the side and back of her leg right behind her knee. This area is very sensitive and she will really enjoy this.(use enough pressure so that you don’t tickle her)
(Now you will move into the position in figure 5 below, or one that you find comfortable and allows you to use your tongue and hands at the same time.) Move up to her inner thigh and very slowly kiss and lick and suck her inner thighs one at a time. Vary your kissing and licking. And here is a good stroke for you to use that you might not have used before. Gently suck the skin on her inner thigh near her knee and with out breaking the suction slide your mouth all the way up to the top of her leg where it meets her pubic area. To do this you will have to lick the area where you will be sliding your mouth and get the area very wet first.
At this point her vagina will be almost dripping wet. But you are still going to tease her some more until she is like a bubbling volcano about to erupt. So now move your mouth up to the area around her vulva (the external vaginal area). Kiss, lick and suck all around both sides along the area next to her vulva. Lick her there with long sweeping strokes with your tongue, kiss, suck and lick her all over the area next to her vulva. Do the same to the other side and right above and below her vagina on her perineum (the space below her vagina and above her anus, This area is very sensitive and she will love it!) Do this for a 2-3 minutes and she will want you to lick her clit so bad she won’t be able to stand it.
After you have teased her for a while as described in step 9 slowly start licking, kissing and sucking on her outer vaginal lips. Then lick with long strokes up and down the outside, on, and inside of each lip.
Now make your tongue as wide as possible and lick her vagina from the very bottom of her perineum to the very top of her clitoral hood (it’s the same motion
you would use as if you were licking an ice cream cone. Do this several times.
Start to focus on her clitoris directly now. You can lick up and down or side to side, or make circles with your tongue around and around her clit. Listen to her and find out what she likes and when she says "oh yeah, Right There!" or something to that effect you know you are on the right track so don’t do anything different. Just keep doing the same thing.
Note:
Ask her to tell you when she is going to cum so that you can back off and stop stimulating her when she tells you she is about to cum. At this point you should bring her just to the edge of her orgasm and when she tells you she is about to cum, back off and not let her have the orgasm yet. Kiss her elsewhere and stop all stimulation for ten seconds or so. Now start the stimulation again and bring her to the edge of her orgasm again. Do this at least 3-5 times and the move on to the step below.
Now add in the G-spot stimulation in the following manner. Very slowly start to gently touch the opening of her vagina with one of your fingers (either your index or middle finger will work best) while you continue clitoral stimulation with your mouth. Slowly rotate your finger around the opening over her vagina. At this point you are just teasing her vagina and your finger should not be in her any further than ½". She may start to push her vagina closer to you bringing your finger deeper into her, but don’t go any deeper than the ½" at this time.
REMEMBER
you are in control right now (It’s a great feeling to be in control when you are with a women…lol) and you are the one who is bringing her great pleasure so just keep up the teasing and clitoral stimulation and if she start to cum you can do one of the following:
Let her cum and wait another 90 seconds to 2 minutes before resuming direct stimulation.
Stop stimulation and not let her cum. Kiss her and let her cool down just a bit for about 20-30 seconds and start stimulation again. By doing this you will increase her sexual tension and bring her arousal and anticipation up even higher.
As you continue clitoral stimulation with your mouth, slowly slide your finger another ½" into her vagina. So now you are about 1" inside her. Keep doing the circular teasing and also in and out motion. Do this for another minute or so.
Then slide your finger in another ½" deeper and start to rub the top wall of her vagina with the pad (where your finger print is) of your finger with very light pressure in a circular clockwise motion. Do this as continue oral stimulation of her clit for 2 minutes.
Slide your finger into her ½"-1" more, so now you are about 1 ½" inches to 2" inches inside her, about up to your second knuckle. Now try to feel for her G-Spot on the top wall of her vagina (remember it should be a slightly swollen area about the size of a dime.) massage it very gently with a come here motion with your finger. Continue to do this and at the some time continue to stimulate her clit with your tongue. As she gets more and more turned on and closer to a G-spot orgasm you can increase the amount of pressure you are using. Continue this for a few minutes. (Always make sure that she is very well lubricated either with her vaginal juices or from your saliva)
At this time you will want to add a second finger slowly and then continue the same stroke.
You will want to try different level of pressure, speed and strokes as you learned in the
GSA Stimulation Manual Strokes
section. You maybe thrusting your fingers in and out of the GSA sliding your fingertips along the G-spot it’s self or making a vibratory movement with your fingertips with constant pressure on her G-spot. Try it all, be creative and see what your lover responds to best you may discover something that works great for your lover that I have not covered here. But at this point you must keep both your tongue and your fingers moving and overload her with stimulation. This will bring her a very powerful combined G- spot and clitoral orgasm.