Read Feros and the Underworld Prince Online
Authors: A.L. Bridges
Tags: #humor, #gods and goddesses, #paranormal, #contemporary, #romance, #fantasy, #supernatural, #action, #supernatural abilities, #mythology
“
Please… tell me that you’re joking… and that you were at least wearing clothes if you aren’t.” I beg.
“
Okay… but I’d be lying on both counts. She said something about her coming here being a mistake if you were just going to sleep with every whore from here to Baltimore. I’m pretty sure I should take offense at being called a whore, but I have no clue what a Baltimore is.” Nagi says as I feel my last chance with Cheza slipping away.
“
It’s a city in… Cincinnati…” I reply as my love life corrodes around me. I hear a knock at my door so I trundle over to answer it.
“
Hey man, are you ready to g—oh, sorry if I’m interrupting.” Travis says when he notices Nagi as I finish putting on my pants.
“
You’re not; let’s go… I really need a drink.” I reply, downtrodden as I shut the door behind me.
We leave Graythorn Hall and start walking to town.
“
Is that the girl you were talking about earlier?” Travis asks.
“
Yeah…” I reply simply.
“
So… do you want to talk about what’s bothering you?” Travis asks as we walk into the forested path that leads into town.
“
Nah, I think I’m just going to try and drink this problem away.” I reply.
I do want to talk about it, but I can’t without explaining my situation, which would blow my cover. We head into the subway tunnel and wait for a train for about five minutes. Travis pulls a folded flyer from his pocket and checks it for directions before we get off at the second counter-clockwise stop. This part of town seems pretty upscale with large houses and expensive looking restaurants. I follow Travis for about five blocks until we reach a large club.
“
This is the place?” I ask incredulously. We walk up to the door where a bouncer stops us.
“
Who sent you?” the bouncer asks.
“
What was her name again… Jenny! No wait, Penny!” Travis says.
“
Whenever I picture her, for some reason Latin cruise ships come to mind… Cruz ships… Penelope!” I exclaim and the bouncer waves us in.
The place isn’t packed, but it is a bit crowded. Travis and I head to the bar and yell our drink orders over the music. The bartender hands us our drinks and leaves without seeing identification or money.
“
Hey, aren’t you the guy that won the arm-wrestling competition yesterday?” An Indian guy asks Travis. I scan his aura and see orange with black streaks… or is it black with orange streaks? My guess is that he’s a weretiger, but he isn’t enhanced.
“
Yeah, that was me.” Travis replies.
“
That was impressive, man. So do you do any martial arts?” the guy asks as I see a pair of feathery white wings fluttering through the crowd.
“
Excuse me for a moment.” I say and make a beeline towards those wings.
“
Lila, what are you doing here?” I ask as I turn her around.
“
Cole? Lookie Aimee, its Cole! Hi Cole!” Lila drunkenly exclaims.
The blonde girl in front of Lila turns around and I recognize her as Lila’s fairy friend Aimee, whom I met at Lila’s birthday party last year. Aimee’s eyes go wide in recognition of me.
“
Please don’t tell my mom.” Aimee pleads.
“
How did you two even get in here? Alright, I’m taking you guys home.” I tell them.
“
Aw, come on! Loosen up Cole! Have a drink with us!” Megan, the brunette fairy friend that I also met at Lila’s party, says after coming over with a drink in each hand.
“
Fine…” I reply as I take the brightly colored drink that Megan is offering.
“
But only one drink and then I’m taking all of you home.” I tell them.
“
Yay!” Lila exclaims as she clings onto me.
In retrospect, I really should have seen that something was going to go horribly wrong; after all, when in the history of the world has ‘only one drink’ ever been only one drink?
…
Chapter 26: Waking Up with Disgust
[September 21st]
I awaken in an unfamiliar bed, wearing only my boxers, with a pounding headache, and a small bushy tail in my face that belongs to a familiar looking chinchilla.
“
Hello Colton.” I grumble and push him away as I notice a magnificent ass next to my right hand… a tan ass, next to my feathered-wing covered right hand… Oh you have got to be shitting me!
(Dat jailbait ass! i.e. the last ass you will see other than Ramrod Randy’s in block 2)
“
Airi, please tell me what happened last night.”
(Oh, I think you know what happened. You’d think that your first experience with fairy alcohol would have been enough to warn you that you shouldn’t drink it)
“
Oh, that little bitch! Wait, so did Lila and I… did we…”
(I recall you telling Lila, ‘you’re like my little toe; you’re short, cute, and I’m probably going to bang you on my couch tonight.’ Lila came back by telling you that her place was closer)
“
Augh… I’m so disgusted with myself…”
Lila’s bedroom door opens and a boyish-looking man that is about 5’6” with long blonde hair looks at the situation. His eyes narrow when they get to me. He charges into the room with a six inch knife, jumps over Lila, and flies toward me as my vision kicks in and his aura identifies him as a fairy. I use my left hand to stop the incoming blade as it plunges toward my heart.
“
What did you do to the princess?” the guy asks with an uninflected tone and a practically pre-pubescent voice.
(As your attorney, you have two defenses: ‘But your honor, she gave me that come hither look!’ and ‘Those body shots were all her; I was just trying to clean her with my tongue, I swear!’)
“
Never mind, don’t bother replying when the answer is obvious.” the guy says and pours his weight onto the knife.
I move my left hand down, grab the blade, and snap it from the handle as I push my right hand against his chest, and thrust my hips upward, rolling him off the left side of the bed and onto the floor.
“
Would you just calm down!” I exclaim when I have him pinned.
“
So you had your fun with the princess and now it’s my turn, is that it?” the guy expressionlessly accuses.
“
What?” I ask confused until I realize that this guy’s chest is kind of squishy.
“
HOLY SHIT! YOU’RE A WOMAN!?” I shout as I reel back. My attacker of uncertain gender takes this opportunity to get me on my back.
“
Yes, you ass; Now sit still and let me kill you so I can kill myself to atone for my failure.” she says with a monotone.
“
Charlotte, stop screaming… I’ve got a massive headache. Cole didn’t do anything; nothing hurts besides my head.” Lila says as she sits up out of bed.
Lila walks over to her dresser, pulls out some clothes, and throws them on. Well I am just super relieved that I didn’t have sex with a fifteen year old!
“
Cole, if memory serves from the last morning I woke up with you, you owe me breakfast.” Lila states as I recall the promise I made to her the morning after I wiped out the memories of her rape.
“
Alright, just lead me to the kitchen and I’ll make pancakes and bacon.” I tell her as I stand up.
“
That sounds good… bacon can help a hangover, right?” Lila asks as she opens her bedroom door.
“
I’m not sure, but I’ll fix you something that will. Do you have any orange juice?” I inquire as I follow her down the hall. Lila stops and turns around.
“
Charlotte! Do we have any orange juice?” Lila calls out.
“
I’d like to say that young girls that ditch their bodyguards to go to a party and get trashed deserve their hangovers… but yes we do.” Charlotte emotionlessly says as she walks out of the bedroom.
I don’t know how I didn’t realize that Charlotte was a woman; it’s obvious to me (despite her nearly non-existent bust) by the rest of her physical features, the way she walks, and the cold glare in her eyes whenever she looks at me.
“
Yeah sorry about that… and ease up on your attitude towards Cole; you’re in the presence of a god.” Lila says sincerely, but finishes in an almost teasing fashion.
“
Wait, you’re
that
Cole?” Charlotte asks with her usual lack of emotion, so I nod.
“
The one that tortured Aengus Og to death in the middle of a banquet and took his spot as a member of the Tuatha De?” Charlotte clarifies. I nod in response once again.
“
What are you doing here? I thought you were dead?” Charlotte asks.
“
Yeah, about that… I’ll explain over breakfast.” I reply as we walk into the kitchen of Lila’s rather large penthouse.
Lila pulls out the stuff to start making bacon while Charlotte hands me an apron so I don’t get grease burns on my bare chest. Lila and Charlotte leave the kitchen and I start cooking the bacon while pouring two glasses of orange juice. I gulp down one of the glasses and pour some of my blood into the second glass, which I bring to Lila in the dining room.
“
Airi, please take care of Lila’s hangover and reconnect my blood that is already in her. Please take care of my hangover as well.”
(Fine… but don’t make this a regular thing!)
I return to the kitchen, finish the bacon, and start cooking the pancakes. Ten minutes later, I walk into the dining room holding a platter of pancakes, a plate of bacon, and three plates. Charlotte goes into the kitchen and returns with the silverware, butter, and maple syrup.
“
Alright so I want some answers, Cole.” Lila demands as she eats her pancakes.
“
Chief among them being what happened to your arm? The bandages are really noticeable when you are only wearing that apron and your boxers.” Lila says.
I sigh heavily as I stop eating and unwrap my bandages. Lila gasps and gapes when she sees my arm.
“
Cole…” Lila quietly says with her eyes full of concern.
“
My left arm was bitten off by a giant snake in the Underworld while I was preventing Cheza from being eaten by said snake. I ended up making a new one out of the same material as my swords.” I explain.
“
But doesn’t that mean that you can’t feel your left arm?” Lila asks.
“
I have no sense of touch with my left arm, but I still have proprioception or the sense of my arm’s placement relative to my body. The inside of the arm is all muscle tissue and blood so I can feel the nerves in the muscle, but all nerve endings that were in my skin are gone as a trade-off for having an indestructible arm; that’s why I was able to snap the blade of Charlotte’s knife earlier.” I inform her.
“
Oh Cole…” Lila says with this pitying look.
“
So why are you at Fogquartz?” Charlotte asks somewhat snidely, but that might just be my imagination because neither her tone nor expression has changed.
“
I’m working with The Agency on an investigation. I’m posing as a student at the university to get information; that’s why I had to silence you the other day in the café.” I say while turning to Lila.
“
*Gasp* Is that guy you were with a bad guy!?” Lila asks with an excited light in her eyes.
“
No, he’s sort of my friend, but my cover might have been blown had I allowed you to finish your question.” I explain.
“
So if I see you in town, am I not allowed to say hi…?” Lila pouts. This is totally unfair; it should be illegal for a girl to grow up and become hot yet still retain a cuteness that bends me to her will.