Few Things Left Unsaid (31 page)

I went home and opened my email id. I saw her pictures. She looked good. Not as good as my Riya. But not bad. Brown eyes. Fair. Chubby cheeks. Slightly overweight and slightly on the shorter side. A decent girl. I could carry on with her.    

After looking at the pictures my mind said…                     

END OF Riya AND BEGINNING OF HARSHA…

Finally I can remove the memories of Riya from my mind.

I messaged her…         

You look nice dear… not perfect but suitable for me.

She replied    

 Then who is perfect for you..

I replied 

 I am sorry if it hurts you. But Riya will always be perfect. No one can replace her. But you have everything that a boy needs .Talk to you at night. You do your work.Bye.

                  
UNSPOKEN TRUTH

                                            I
made up my mind to propose to her. If there was any girl who could help me forget my past it was Harsha. I decided to propose to her today itself. I was waiting for the day to pass and night to come.  I was waiting for some magic to come in my life. But it could not happen. Maybe she was the girl I was waiting for. She was the girl who could bring my life back. Bring my happiness back. I got tired of waiting for Riya. She couldn’t hear my cries. She couldn’t feel my tears. Only God knows what I was going through. All alone in darkness. It was time to move on. But still something told me to wait.  This time I wouldn’t listen to this something. This time I would propose to Harsha.  Who said love happens just once? It could happen twice.

I went to my room and thought how silly I was. I should have taken this step long ago. Riya wouldn’t be back. Maybe this love story was not meant to be successful. God had some different plans in his mind. I had to accept it. Today I was going to give my life a second chance.

I called Harsha around 11pm. She picked up the call.

HARSHA : Hi. Thanks for coming. Did you like my photos?

ME: I want to tell you something. It can change our lives.

HARSHA: Don’t tell me you are in love with me.

ME: Just close your eyes and feel it.

HARSHA: What is it? Now you are scaring me.

ME:
Really, I don’t deserve a girl like you, I am a flirt, I have the worst image, but still I want to change. I want to improve. I want a girl who can improve me. And it’s you.I knowsomewhere Riya will always be there in my mind.But I love you baby. And today when I saw your photos, I just wanted to hug you and never let you go. You are special to me. You make me complete. I will never leave you alone in this relationship. Love you. Do you wish to be my beloved?

There was a long silence. I asked her to say something.

HARSHA: Are you telling this for the first time to any girl or you have said this to others too?

How could she know that I had proposed to Riya in the same way. Or she just guessed. I could not understand her. I had a doubt.

ME: It’s just for you. I never said it to anyone. And now I have a special song for you too. Tujhe dekh dekh sona, tujhe dekh kar hai jagna……. And I sang it.

Again there was silence……

HARSHA: This is surely not just for me. You have sung this for someone. Tell me. Am I right?

I became more and more suspicios. I thought she knew me. How could she know all this?But I saw her photos.Were they fake?

ME: I love you. I love you jaan. I love you my sweet little cute bacchu. Missing you.

She didn’t say a word. Even I didn’t say a word. I could hear some soft noise from her side. I tried to hear what it was. She was crying. She was not letting me know she was crying. My suspicioius were confirmed after this.

ME: You are my bachha. You are my jaan. You are my wife. Oh my god! I can’t believe it. Tell me truth. Please jaan tell me. Please. You are my Riya. Is it right?You sent me fake photos,Am I right?

Still there was silence. No words exchanged. It brought tears in my eyes. I could not believe what was happening. Is it a dream? When I was in a relationship I let her go. I tried to forget her, but it did not happen. I tried to give second chance to my relationship but she was not ready. I again decided to get over her. I got Harsha. I decided to propose to her. And now again Riya..

ME: Please answer me. Please.

I started crying badly. I wanted to hear her real name.

She was still crying silently.

ME: Please answer. I know you are my Riya.It's time for us to put away our childish attitude because now I really know how much we are missing each other. Please, do come back to me; you still have a place in my heart, I am assuring you that I have been very lonely ever since you said goodbye.Remember those days when we both shared the songs we sang together, , the smiles that came on each time we saw each other. Don't throw away all the sweet memories, which we shared.. I am quite sure that you may feel I will not give you a chance based on the old stories. This is the only opportunity we have to rewrite our history. Never mind, just put away your pride because I'll accept any simplicity at any giving time.

Come back, please come back and rewrite our history.

Still there was silence. This silence was killing me.

ME: I know that we haven't talked for a long time, but that doesn't mean that I don't think about you each and every day. You don't know just how much I wish that I could be lying there with you whispering in your ear my heart's deepest desires.

I close my eyes and let my thoughts of you flow.. I picture us lying in bed, your arms around me, my head upon your chest, my fingers gently circle over your skin. My soft lips place a whisper of a kiss on your neck. I can hear your heart beats getting louder and faster. In my mind, your lips capture me and hold me there in ecstasy. We look into each other's eyes, lost ... no, found. I feel your hands caress me as you whisper against my ear. You make sweet, sweet love to me and you wipe away a tear. A slight laugh, mixed with a cry, such beautiful feelings ... I sigh. Each time that you touch me, feels like the first time.As each night passes, your presence seems more real here with me, but then I open my eyes and realise it was just another dream. Tears fall from my eyes. Pain sears through my chest. My heart is crying out for you.

Finally she spoke…..

Riya: .I want to give you a love bite which will be visible to everyone.So that no girl will come close to you.Let the world know that you are mine. Just mine. And no one can get you now. I love you. Love you a lot. You are my kid. My bachha.So innocent. So sweet. My Mr PERFECT.I have tried so hard to fight these feelings I have, but I can't do it anymore. I know that I love you, but I didn't want to tell you.

We had known knew each other only for a couple of weeks and you already had me completely and totally to yourself. I don't even want to think about being with anyone else. I thought that if I stopped talking to you, I would forget how I felt ... I thought that if I could keep myself busy, I would be okay, but I can't forget and I'm not okay. I am so overwhelmed by my feelings for you. I need to hear your voice. I need to feel your touch. I can't let you go I feel terrible for not talking to you for the last few  months. So many nights I have cried my eyes out, missing you so much, I broke up with Amit long back. He was not right for me. You were right. You are my Mr PERFECT.

ME: I have waited so long to be able to wake up every day to look at your beautiful face. I'm so thankful to God that you're here.You take my breath away with some of the things you say. Just the way I feel when I lay with you, your arms wrapped around me, holding me, like I'm your baby. I am sometimes surprised of how much emotion flows out when I cry over you. You say I'm perfect and that you're the luckiest girl in the world, but you don't see what I see when I look at you. I am so lucky to even have you touch me with your hands. Or to even glance my way. I don't know what I did to deserve you in my life, but I thank God for letting me do it. You are so unbelievably perfect.

We didn’t realise when the sun rose. It was 7am in morning and we were still talking to each other. We decided to meet near the central garden at 2pm.We went to sleep.

Waiting for the new day. I never thought I will get her back. I never thought such a thing would happen with me. The world seemed beautiful today. Everyone around seemed to be happy. Suddenly my outlook towards looking at people changed. It was a positive start. The day which I was waiting for had arrived. I was going to meet Riya my love after such a long time. I had forgotten her touch. I had forgotten her smile.

Did she still look same? I never saw her for the last few months. I was thinking about this all the time. I wanted to feel her touch again. I wanted to see her smile again. I could not wait for the clock to strike 2pm.

I remembered each and every thing about her. She had said once that I would never get a girl who could love me as she did. She was true. Now I understood love couldn’t happen twice. It could happen just once. I was getting attracted to Harsha because she was not Harsha. She was my Riya. The days I spent without her, the nights I thought about her looking at stars, the dreams which involved her , the places where we went , the moments that we shared everything was fresh in mind. She told me she loved me more than the world and that she couldn't imagine being with anyone else. We had such an amazing time when we were together.When I found out the truth about her I was distraught, heartbroken, and felt used, foolish and disgusted. But still today I was waiting for her on the same place where our relationship became intimate. I loved her beyond any limit.

She came. The moment I saw her my heart skipped a beat again. The naughty smile was back on her face. The charm seemed to be lost though. Maybe her hectic schedule was the reason. But I must admit she was looking more beautiful than before. More perfect than before. She had straightened her hair. She looked amazing. She came closer. Closer and suddenly she kissed me. I looked around to see if anyone was watching. No one was there. She smiled.

“You have not changed at all. Why do you have to look here and there.” She smiled and kissed me again

“As if you have changed. You are still the same. Care a damn about the people around.” I said and caught her hand.

To touch her after such a long time was beautiful. Riya was back. We decided to go to Grant lane. For the first time she was sitting on my bike. She appreciated it. She put her arm round my waist and leaned against me. I kissed her. I asked her what exactly happened. How did she get my number as I had changed it.What had happened with Amit? I had many questions in my mind. As we reached Grant lane and sat on the bench where we used to sit she bagan telling me about her life in last one year…

              
REVEALING THE TRUTH

                                           I
t was the beginning of a new relationship for me. It was not easy to forget the moments that I had with you. It was not easy to forget the places where we had gone. I  never forgot you. Never did your thoughts leave my mind. The farther I went the closer I was getting to you. I tried to be loyal with Amit. He was behaving very sweetly. He used to care a lot for me. I had requested him to give me some time to forget you. He agreed to it. I used to cry a lot when I was with him.  When we went to Grant lane, I cried for almost an hour. Whenever his bike passed Central garden I could not stop my tears. He knew all these things. He was always with me.When I had an operation,He supported me a lot. I realised I should give him the same love in return. I should not think about you.I said sorry to him and told him this would never happen again. We always used to fight when you were discussed.