Fight With Me (Fight and Fall) (3 page)

Lucas chuckles at me and I look at him with confusion.

“I know how you feel. I want you so bad, but we’re outside where anybody can see us. Plus, we have to inside, like, right now. We’ll finish this soon,” he says adamantly.

I nod at him, inwardly frozen in fear. What am I doing? How can I lead him on like this? Lucas is a great guy and I’m fighting my urge to be with him. Physic
ally I want him but emotionally…well, I’m just not capable of that yet.

He grabs my hand, leading me with him back into the bar. I look around
, noticing the looks on the customer’s faces. Some of disgust, others of pity.

Oh my God, here we go again. Just like in Arizona. I’m public enemy number one,
punished for crimes I never even committed.

“Hey, it’
ll be fine, Em. We’ll push through tonight and worry about everything tomorrow,” Lucas says to me, squeezing my hand in his.

His encouragement is the only comfort
I have right now. I have nothing else to keep me going and I’m going to have to find a way to change that.

The rest of the hour goes by pretty uneventful. Sure, I got a few stares but nothing as bad
as some I’ve received in the past. I meet up with Lucas back in the kitchen to clock out for the night.

He grabs my hand, pulling me close to him. He wraps me in a hug, resting his chin on my head, breathing in deeply. I stand
statuesque, not knowing what to do. I pat him on the back, trying to end the display of affection.

“Somebody’s anxious to go home, huh?” he says laughing.

He obviously can’t understand my real reason for ending the embrace. If he knew how I really felt it would hurt him.

I put on a brave face, the opposite of the nervous one I’m sporting on the inside and grab his hand in mine. You have to do this
, Emma. Just give it a go. Try and see if you can be with him.

“Yeah. I want you, Lucas,” I
say to him, silently dying on the inside.

His eyes widen, probably because I’ve never spoken to him like this before. I’m telling him exactly what I want. Well, not exactly what I want but he doesn’t know
all the minor details.

“Shit,
Em. Well, why didn’t you say so earlier? Let’s get out of here. I’ll just call my dad later and explain everything to him. There’s no way I’m staying here any longer. Let’s go,” he says, practically dragging me out the back door of the bar.

I
inwardly sigh at his evident rush to get me to his apartment. I have to think of a good way to go about this entire Lucas thing. Should I politely decline sleeping with him or just go for it? God, Aiden, why did it have to be this way? Why did you make me fall in love with you and then break my heart?

We turn
down the corner of the street and I see a tall apartment building, comprised of rusty-colored bricks. He doesn’t utter another word and I appreciate the silence. What really can be said at this point?

We get inside the building
, and he takes me down the first floor hall. He gets his keys out of his pocket, unlocking the last door on the left of the corridor. He flings it open, bringing me inside with him. He slams the door behind us and starts to back me up against it, a look of hunger in his eyes. My heartbeat increases, my breath coming out in puffs. I’m terrified. Not of what he’s about to do but terrified that I’ll like what’s he’s about to do. I panic, realizing I need to end this because this is moving
way
too fast.

“Lu…” I barely finish saying his name before he knocks the breath right out of me.

He silences me with a desperate kiss, pushing his tongue inside of my mouth. My eyes grow large in shock. He grabs my waist in his hands, pushing himself up against me. I shiver, loving and equally hating it. My still lips start moving along with excitement, as I mingle my tongue with his. He moans into my mouth, pushing up my dress in the process.

Yeah, this is way too fast.
I pull my mouth away from him, needing to halt this before it’s too late.

“Lucas, it’s too much. I….” I say as he silences me with a
nother kiss.

“No. It’s not enough,
Em. Let me make you come. I need it,” he breathes.

He moves his lips to my ear, biting the lobe
gently, sliding his incisors against it. I tremble, chills breaking out across my skin. He traces his tongue around it, sucking it into his mouth. My eyes roll back in my head.

He takes my silence as an invitation, moving my dress up farther. His thumb brushes against the edge of my panties and I moan. He moves his lips to my neck
, and he continues to suck my sensitive skin. I move my head to the side giving him better access. An image of Aiden appears in my head, ending any sexual thoughts between Lucas and I.

I roughly push him
away from me, panting with exertion.

“
Em?” Lucas asks in a wounded tone.

“I’m so sorry but I can’t. I’m not ready yet
, Lucas. Aiden and I just broke up and everything is just so confusing. Please understand,” I say to him, hoping that he will forgive me.

I hate to be the one to
reject him but if I need to be a bitch and put my foot down, then so be it. He sighs in frustration. Yeah, you and me both, buddy.

“No, you’re right. I’m being an insensitive
asshole about the whole thing. It’s just that I’ve wanted you all week and I thought…shit, I thought that you wanted me just as much. I’m sorry for rushing this,” he says avoiding eye contact.

Is he embarrassed by his lack of restraint? I hope not. It’s flattering but unfortuna
tely unwanted at this point in time. I smile at him, trying to diffuse the situation.

“Trust me, you did nothing wrong. I thoug
ht I could go through with this, us being together tonight, but I was chicken-shit, I guess. Sorry for being a total cock-block,” I say trying to lighten the mood.

He lifts his eyes up to meet mine and chuckles. Oh
, thank God! Back to the friendly repartee.

“Yeah, that really sucked. Guess it’s just me and my
hand tonight,” he says smirking, looking down at his hand. “This guy has his work cut out for him.”

Dirty bastard! I laugh at him, loving the fact that he can just brush off the entire situation. Lucas is just that kind of guy and I admire him for it. He’s a troublemaker but I
know deep down that he means well.

“Well, I give you full permission to imagine me while you’re jerking off. Don’t go at it for
too long though. Wouldn’t want you to get blisters,” I say to him laughing.

“Real funny,
Em. I’ll try not to hurt myself but I will definitely take you up on that offer,” he retorts.

“So, do I get a tour of the place now? The only thing I’ve seen so far is your apartment door,” I say smirking.

“I can show it to you again if you want. I could push you up against it and….” I put my fingers against his mouth, silencing any further filthy conversation from him.

“Okay, the grand tour and then bed. Nod your head if you understand me?” I say to him, my fingers still
restricting him from speaking.

He nods his head up and down into my fingers
, his eyes wide with mock fear and compliance. I move my fingers away from his mouth, finally allowing him the right to speak again.

“Damn, you’re feisty,
Em. Okay, let the tour begin,” he says motioning for me to follow him.

             
We walk towards the kitchen, which is quite small yet agreeable. It’s not like I’m going to be making three-course meals or anything. I’m a recently burned, single woman now. Lean Cuisine, here I come.

             
“The kitchen, if you couldn’t tell. I don’t cook much. I usually just eat at the bar or go to this sandwich place down the street. If you ever want to wake me up with breakfast, you won’t hear any complaints from me,” he says smirking.

             
“Hey, the 1950’s called and they want their chauvinistic attitude back. You think because I’m a woman I’ll cook for you, huh?” I say smartly.

             
“Whoa, settle down there, Em. All I’m saying is that I wouldn’t mind waking up to fresh bacon. Picturing you cooking over a stove in a sexy little apron kind of does it for me, what can I say?” he shrugs.

             
“Yeah, yeah, I bet it does,” I chuckle.

             
“Well, since you weren’t too excited about the kitchen area, let me show you the rest. I swear I won’t make any bathtub comments,” he smiles.

             
I roll my eyes, following him down the small hallway.

             
“So, we share a bathroom but I swear I won’t spend all morning in there making myself pretty. This doesn’t need any help,” he says motioning to his face.

             
I chuckle, not regretting my choice to move in with him. Lucas makes me laugh and keeps me on my feet. I really need that right now. Just thinking about him not being here to keep me preoccupied freaks me the fuck out. My brain is racing just thinking about my new life, sans Aiden.

             
I look into the floor-to-ceiling white bathroom, trying to figure out how I’m going to keep this place clean. Whoever thought that an all-white bathroom was a good idea should be shot. It doesn’t look too grimy but it’s ‘boy clean.’ Not overly messy but a few missed spots here and there.

             
“If you ever need help washing your back in the shower, let me know. I know it’s hard to reach sometimes,” he says smirking.

             
“Hey, you said no shower comments. Bad, Lucas!” I scold him chuckling.

             
“I said no
bathtub
comments. I never said anything about the shower. That’s fair game, Em,” he retorts.

             
“Smartass,” I mutter as he leads down the hall.

             
“This is my room,” he gestures to the door next to the bathroom. “This one’s yours,” he says opening the door to the room adjacent to his.

             
I peer in, seeing only emptiness. No bed, no couch, nothing.

             
“Wow, impressive,” I say shocked by its bareness.

             
“Yeah, I know. It sucks that there’s nothing in here. I had a roommate before but when he moved out I just kind of left it this way. You can do whatever you want to it, Em. Decorate it, put girly shit in here, a Channing Tatum poster, whatever. I have a blow-up mattress you can use if that’s cool? You can sleep on it until you get a real bed,” he says going into the closet.

             
He grabs the folded air mattress, laying it out on the floor. He presses the button in the side of the mattress, instantly bringing its flat form to life.

             
“Eh, I’ll probably just use it for a while. I’m not picky where I sleep,” I say shrugging.

             
“Well, that being said, you know where my room is in case you want to have a sleepover. I promise not to hit you too hard when we have a pillow fight,” he smirks.

             
“A pillow fight? What are you, a twelve year old girl?” I retort.

             
“You know you would love that, Em. Don’t lie,” he chuckles coming closer to me.

             
His strides focused, intent. My eyes widen, afraid of his intentions. Um, I thought we settled this already. Was I not clear enough?

“I see that look,
Em. Relax,” he says stopping in front of me. “I just want a friendly hug goodnight. It’s the least you could do for me,” he says pretending to sulk.

Classic Lucas. Manipulating me to the very end. I chuckle, not the least bit annoyed by him. If anything, I’m relieved he’s still comfortable around me. This could have gone very badly. Rejected men can really be dicks sometimes.

“Oh, okay. Bring it in,” I say opening my arms.