Fight With Me (Fight and Fall) (7 page)

The back door to the
bar opens and I try to get myself together. I sniffle and look up to see that somebody has graced me with his unexpected and embarrassing appearance. I notice two piercing blue eyes that sear me with concern.

“What the hell,
Em? What the fuck did he do to you?” Lucas says kneeling down towards me, wiping away tears.

I try to steady my breathing, thinking of a way to explain the situation to Lucas. I cringe
, knowing how bad this is going to sound.

“No
, Lucas. I’m fine, really. Well, not really but not in the way you’re thinking. Aiden and I just had a long talk about stuff. Everything that I thought was going on was way off…well, kind of,” I say, my voice quivering from crying.

“Well, you don’t look okay. You’re clothes are crumpled and your lip is swollen and bleeding. If he didn’t hurt you, what…” Lucas stops, finally understanding what happened.

I touch my bottom lip and flinch. I pull my hand away and notice a drop of blood on my fingertip. I knew my lip was sensitive but I just figured Aiden tugged on it too hard. Damn, he must have really been angry at me for kissing Lucas.

Lucas looks at me
, his eyes narrowing. Nothing like when Aiden gets mad but mad for a guy like Lucas.

“Tell me one thing,
Em. Did he force you?” Lucas asks torn.

I’m guessing he’s torn because he really doesn’t want me to have be
en raped but at the same time, doesn’t want it to be consensual either. Between a rock and a hard place. Poor Lucas.

“No,” I
whisper, feeling guilty as hell.

He sighs, rubbing his jaw in frustration. I’m so sorry for hurting you, Lucas. That was never my intention. It’s funny, I’m so worried about being hurt by others, I don’t take a look at myself and realize that I’m the one who mistreats pe
ople too.

“Well,
Em, I really don’t know what to say. I was just kissing you and then you go off with him and…shit, I’m so stupid. I rushed things and you practically ran into his arms again. I never did have a chance, did I?” he asks me dismally.

“I’m so sorry, Lucas. If you can believe me, I never meant for any of this to happen. I was always attracted to you but with Aiden…it’s just different
, I guess. I tried to let him go but then he brought me out here and…he explained the entire situation and I was wrong about him. I’m not back together with him by any means, but I just can’t be with anyone else. I can truly be a selfish person, Lucas, and I want you to know that. The me you think you know, well, that’s not the real me. Far from it. Aiden and I are so similar and that’s why we fit. You’re so good, Lucas. You’re
too
good for me,” I say as he tries to interrupt.

“No
, it’s true. Listen, when you get home from work, I want to tell you more about myself. Why I am the way I am. I’m not making excuses for my behavior but hopefully it will help you to understand me better. It’ll probably make you run for the hills, in all honesty. This fun, carefree woman that you’ve built up in your head doesn’t exist. She’s mean, cold, and sometimes I fucking hate her,” I say almost hysterically.

“
Em, don’t talk like that. It’s not true and I don’t know why you believe that. I really want to talk more tonight because I have to go back inside now. But know this…I’m still here for you, waiting for you. Even if nothing ever happens between us, I’m still here. Did it piss me off that you guys… were together, yeah. But I can be patient
and
persistent. I think you know that about me though,” he says smiling.

“Yeah, you kind of told me
repeatedly,” I say smiling back.

I frown, just remembering our living situation. I would totally understand if he wanted to kick my ass to the curb.

“Are you sure that’s okay if I stay with you? I don’t want it to be weird. And you can bring back…you know, bring back chicks to the apartment whenever you want. I won’t get mad or judge you. I don’t need you to be celibate, for God’s sake. That would be like Chinese water torture for you, I can imagine,” I say with a straight face.

“
Em, you’re incredible. Well, for one, I still want you to stay with me. And two, well, I never bring women back to my place. You were the only one. It’s just not my style. I’m more of a, ‘you’re place or
you’re
place?’ kind of guy,” he says laughing.

“That’s
awful! You’re such a pig, Lucas. You’re lucky I like you or I would have to kick you in the nuts for all the wronged woman out there,” I say actually chuckling through my tears.

“Hey, you’ll never hear any complaints out of them. I make sure to leave them
incoherent before I bail. This tongue can do more than just pick a lock,” he says smartly.

I chuckle again, my tears finally
drying on my face.

Lucas helps me to my feet
, as I stretch my sore legs. I smile at Lucas, thankful to him for making me feel better. He’s a great guy and I envy the woman that gets him. She better not break his heart because I’ll break her nose if she does.

“Thank you for making me feel better. I really needed a good laugh,” I say, giving him a side hug.

I won’t mess around with his or Aiden’s feeling anymore. I feel like shit even leading on Lucas, telling him that I would give us a try. It’s time to grow the fuck up, Emma. No more flirting, only friendly banter permitted. Just act like he’s a chick and nothing more.

He smiles at me, trying to wrap his other arm around me for a full on hug. I do a weird tango thing, trying to move
out of his grasp. He frowns, although his eyes are still playful.

“C’mon,
Em. I can’t touch you at all now?” he says practically whining.

“Side hug and fist bump like before. You know the rules, Lucas,” I say, playfully scolding him.

“Fine. You win. You moved me into the “friend zone” again. I get it,” he says sighing dramatically. “You’re a real ball buster, you know that Em?” he says chuckling.

Oh, I know exactly what you mean. Waitress by night, ball busting bitch by day. It’s a
habit I’m trying to break.

“Okay, off to work. Bye
, Lucas,” I say walking away, waving at him.

“
Two words, Em. Ball buster,” he yells after me.

I chuckle, glad that we’re back to being friends. I still think we have a little while to go before he
finally gives up on me. I really need to play matchmaker with him and get him hooked on someone else. The only name that comes to mind is Leslie. I’ll have to play cupid with those two. I don’t see either of them making the first move on their own.

I round the corner of the bar
lost in my thoughts, as I collide with a hard body.

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t…” I say but can’t finish the
apology.

I turn my head, looking into two foreboding eyes. My spine tingles, my palms breaking out with moisture. My
left eye begins to twitch, a nasty quirk that seldom arises.

“Nice to see you again, Emma.”

Marcus grabs my arm with his hand, giving the pretense of trying to balance me after our collision. I know for a fact that he’s not trying to aid me. He’s trying to intimidate me. It’s not fucking working. Well, kind of not working.

             
I yank my arm out from under his hold, almost falling back in the process. Damn, he really had a good grip on me.

             
He sneers at me, moving his eyes down towards my mouth. He starts reaching towards my lips, and I practically ninja-slap his hand away. I’m not some woman who you can manhandle, so back the fuck off!

             
He chuckles by my response to him. Ugh, I fucking hate that laugh. I want to just shove my boot down his throat until his wind pipe bursts. He truly brings out the worst in me.

             
“I like a fighter. Makes it more interesting when they submit,” he says smiling.

             
I cringe at his words, trying to move around him. As much as I want to retaliate and tell him off, I know I shouldn’t. I know I might not be the smartest person in the world but I know that this guy is dangerous.

             
“Hey now, don’t run off yet. We barely got to catch up. I heard that you and Aiden aren’t together anymore and I wanted to say that I’m really sorry. Looks like he chose his wife over you. She’s a tight little piece off ass, so I don’t blame him,” he says leering.

             
My temper is getting the best of me and he knows it. He’s just waiting for me to lash out at him. I almost take the bait but not quite. Let him think that’s he’s won.

             
“Yeah, well, what can you do? Thanks for the concern,” I say trying to get around him once again.

             
“Cut the shit, Emma. We both know that you want to tear my eyes out and kick me in the junk. I’d let you too. But then you’d have to be punished for being a bad girl,” he says, his mouth almost twisted in anger.

“
You know what I’d do to you? I’d pin your arm behind you so you couldn’t move. Then I’d snap the bone in half with my hand. You’d scream out in pain, begging me to stop. But I can’t, Emma. I want to hear you scream my name, pleading with me. I’d squeeze your neck until I heard you take your last breath. You’d like that wouldn’t you?  You like it rough, don’t you, Emma?” he says chuckling.

             
This guy is a fucking psychopath. I didn’t give him enough credit before. I can tell he is one seriously sick fuck who enjoys inflicting pain on women. I gulp, my body shaking with fear. I feel like I’m going to have a panic attack, right in front of him. I see a few people walking around us, so I know that he won’t pull anything. If I don’t move now, he might pull me back behind the bar and fulfill his threats.

             
I dart around him, walking quickly away, my breathing labored. I still hear him chuckling behind me and I start to shake. Don’t panic, Emma. Calm down and just keep walking.

             
“Run to Lucas’s, Emma. I’ll see you soon and we’ll finish our conversation. Next time you might want to be a little friendlier,” he says yelling out to me.

             
My spine stiffens as I walk even more quickly away. I round the corner and find myself at the boardwalk near the water. I walk to the edge, looking out at its blue depths, focusing solely on the waves.

             
Breathe and calm down. That’s it, try and relax, Emma. So what if he knows where you live now? It’s probably public knowledge because it’s a small town. Don’t read too much into it. He’s not stalking you. He’s just trying to intimidate you, that’s all.

             
I focus on breathing in through my nose and out my mouth.  I close my eyes, trying to think about happy things; puppies, ice-cream, balloons, cute kitten YouTube videos, anything to block out those inky black, fathomless eyes staring back at me. 

             
I let out an unsteady breath, finally able to breathe somewhat normally. I run my hands through my dampened hair, brushing the short locks away from my forehead. His words shook me more than I care to admit.

             
Where do I go from here? Who do I tell? Aiden’s pretty much out of the picture and has too much on his plate already. I can’t go to the police because they won’t do anything. I have no proof of his threats and they probably wouldn’t even believe me. I get chills just thinking about going to them for help. It would be like Arizona all over again. I won’t put myself through that. The situation with Marcus seems a little too eerily familiar for my liking.

             
I know I need to tell Lucas tonight and maybe even Leo. I know they’ll both look out for me. From my understanding, Leo and Aiden have an agreement about looking out for me.             

I hear laughing coming from behind the
boardwalk, a group of teenagers sitting outside and drinking from paper cups. I glance over at the sign that says
Astoria Coffee House and Bistro
with a cute red mug of steaming hot coffee that proudly says
OPEN
within it.

             
I was going to go to the other coffee shop, the one Aiden and I went to, but I don’t think I can. I need something to calm me down and take my mind off of anything unpleasant. Being there without him might just make me fall apart. I definitely don’t want to be the sad and pathetic woman crying into her coffee cup.

             
I forcefully will myself to walk over the café, still shaken and rightfully so. Get it together, Emma. Hang out for a bit and then go back to Lucas’s and make dinner for him. Anything to take your mind off of what happened.

             
I walk inside, noticing that the espresso bar is in a separate room from the lounging area.  A few people are scattered around, some have laptops, others novels that seem to have them fully engrossed. I notice the light blue walls, instantly reminding me of Aiden’s house. Same fucking shade of blue too. My eyes are drawn towards the ceiling of the sitting area, the boarder of the wall adorned with dozens of world globes. Hmmm…weird, yet creative. I like it.

             
I am greeted at the counter by a curvy woman, maybe mid-twenties, with bright red hair pulled up in a bun. Her look is a cross between hipster and pin-up girl. If Bettie Page, Zooey Deschanel, and Kat Von D had a three-way, this would be their love child. She smiles at me and I try to smile back. God, I’m still an edgy hot mess.

             
“Hi, what can I get you?” she practically whispers.

             
She has one of those high, yet smoky sounding voices.

             
“Can I get a large pumpkin latte? Hot,” I choke out.

             
God my voice is a wreck! Jesus, did I just go through puberty or something?

             
She looks at me intently, probably taking in my disheveled state and swollen, cut lip. Wow, I must be a quite a sight.

She nods at me, smiling slightly. She punches my order into the register
and writes it on a cup.

             
“Okay, that will be four dollars even,” she says.

             
I dip my hand into my bag and fish around for my wallet. I give her a five-dollar bill, my hand trembling as I release the cash to her. She notices my twitchy state and looks at me in the eye.

             
“Are you okay?” she asks concerned.

             
I probably look like I’ve been attacked, which is actually true on two accounts. Once with Aiden (rough sex) and with Marcus (scary threats and manhandling). The first one I can deal with, the second, not so much.

             
“Yeah. I’m good,” I practically squeak out.

             
She nods at me, clearly not pacified by my response. She puts the money in the cash register, handing back the remaining dollar. I shake my head at her, pointing to the tip jar             

“It’s all yours. Thank you,” I say to her,
walking over to the end of the counter for my drink.

I see a man
, maybe in his early thirties, start to prepare it. I notice his muscular build outlined by a form fitting white shirt. He’s wearing a slouchy grey beanie, which compliments his greyish eyes. I see him look over to the red haired woman a few times while making my drink but she doesn’t notice.

             
“Pumpkin latte,” he says smiling, passing it off to me by the counter.

             
“Thanks,” I say trying to crack a smile.

             
I walk towards the other room to sit down, my achy body worn to the bone. I find a seat off to the side where nobody else is. I need a little alone time, I think. I grab my iPod out of my bag and pop in my headphones. I sip my drink slowly, trying to enjoy it.

             
I hear a chair across from me being moved, scraping across the floor. I look up and see the woman from the register sit down beside me. I pull out my headphones, confused at what she wants.

             
“Um, I know this is kind of weird and all but I just noticed you’re hurt lip and well…I wanted to make sure if you were really okay. I know it’s none of my business but I made a promise to myself. I just got out of an abusive relationship and he…well he hurt me and I told myself if I ever saw somebody in the same situation I would help. I’m sorry if I’m being rude,” she stammers.

             
Wow, this woman is definitely one of a kind. I’m sure she can see the shock on my face, probably regretting ever coming to my rescue. I won’t lie and say that I’m a little bothered by her concern, but at the same time, it’s very sweet. She seems like somebody who looks out for people and takes care of them. Instead of being my usual self and telling her to fuck off, I shock the hell out of myself. Hey, what do I have to lose by being honest to this woman?

             
“I wasn’t hurt. I mean, I was, kind of. My boyfriend, or I guess you could say, ex-boyfriend bit my lip during rough sex. It’s not as bad as it looks,” I say with absolutely no filter.

             
To be honest, I’m not that embarrassed by my candor. It’s nice talking to another woman about personal stuff. You don’t have to worry about how they will take it. When you talk to a guy about sex, they think it’s an open invitation.

             
She clears her throat, obviously embarrassed by her assumption. I smile reassuringly to her.

             
“I’m
so
sorry. I just thought…I’ve just thoroughly humiliated myself, and you probably will never come in here again and order coffee. I could tell you that I don’t put my foot in my mouth on a regular basis but that would be a lie,” she says sheepishly.

             
“You want me to be honest? It was kind of refreshing that you were concerned about me, a total stranger. I think it was very nice of you to check up on me. We women need to stick together more. Girl power and all that good shit,” I say laughing, pounding my fist in the air.

             
She laughs, her shoulders relaxing and her face losing the embarrassment.

             
“I agree. I don’t have many, more like
any
girlfriends. I’m socially awkward, I guess. Thank you for not making me feel like an idiot,” she says smiling.

             
I smile back at her, enjoying our conversation. I really need to vent right now and I consider doing that with her. I know we just met and she will probably think I’m an over-sharing crazy bitch but what the hell?

             
“I just had a really bad day so far. Do you mind if I vent a little bit?” I ask her curiously.

             
“Of course not. I’m just on my break, so I don’t have anything to do,” she says nicely.

             
“In a nutshell, I just had crazy I hate/love you sex with my kind of boyfriend. I found out that he’s married but in name only. She just came back into town and is practically blackmailing him. There’s way more to the story but the gist of it is that we can’t be together. At least not right now that is,” I say, blowing out air.

             
Her eyes widen, probably trying to decide if I’m telling the truth or if I’m a compulsive, lying sack of shit.

             
“Oh, my gosh! That’s awful. Yeah, I thought I was having a bad day but I think you win. I got a really bad burn from steaming milk earlier but now I’m not so sure I should be complaining,” she says laughing nervously.

             
“To top that, I just had some crazy local manhandle me on the sidewalk. He practically threatened me but I can’t go to the police. I don’t think they will do anything. I had a bad experience with a few awhile back,” I say sighing.

             
“That’s crazy! I’ve lived here my entire life, and I don’t even know what’s been going on around town. I’m guessing you just moved here. Or are you visiting? This is a small town and you don’t look familiar,” she says.