Fighting to Stay (7 page)

“You smell me cookin’ a mile away, brother?” Roam laughs.

“Somethin’ like that.  Serve me up a bowl,” he says, rubbing his stomach.

~*~

After breakfast, Jenn and Switch make their leave and I tidy up while Roam takes a shower.  After getting changed back into my clothes from yesterday, Roam walks out and takes my hand.

“You busy today?”  He asks.

“No.  I don’t work again until tomorrow night.”

“Good
.  I want to take you somewhere.”  He gives my hand a tug and leads me outside to his bike.  Handing me a helmet, he throws his leg over and turns the key.  The bike roars to life and I slide on behind him.  My arms immediately wrap around his middle and then he takes off. 

A short while later,
Roam pulls into a grassy clearing beside a lake.  He cuts the engine and we both get off the bike.  I look around while Roam is getting something from the saddle bags. It’s a beautiful area.  There are bushy green trees everywhere and the grass is lush.  The water is sparkling and it’s so quiet and peaceful.

Roam lays a blanket out on the ground and then sits in the center of it, with his legs and arms open.  I crawl in between them and lie my head back against his chest.

“It’s beautiful here,” I tell him.

“Used to come here when I was a kid,” is all he replies with.

“Is Roam your real name?”  I feel him jerk at my question, so I think I surprised him.

“Yeah, why?” He laughs through his reply.

“It’s just a different name, is all.  I thought it might have been a nickname.”

“Nope.  My mom was
whacked.”

The seriousness of his tone, in what was a light hearted conversation, causes me to turn my head and look up at him.

While I’m trying to think of the right thing, or
anything at all
, to say, he looks out at the water and continues. 

“My father’s Italian.  He met my mom and they had an affair.  He left and went back to Italy and not long later my mom found
out I was on my way.  She’d never traveled, but said she always wanted to.  She called me Roam ‘cause it reminded her of my father, and she always wanted to go there.  Stupid bitch couldn’t even spell it right.”

“Where is she now?” I ask softly.

“Passed away about ten years ago.  I was eighteen, on my own.  It’s how I found the club.  Started off as a prospect, got patched in a little over twelve months later.  They’ve been my only family ever since, ‘sides Jasper.”

“Was she a good mom?”

“Did the best she could, sometimes wasn’t as good as it should have been, but it was still better than some have it.”

I felt like he’d shared a lot, and I’d shared nothing.  So I shared.  “My dad was a bastard.  My mom was weak.”

“Was?”

“Mom shot him and then turned the gun on herself a few years back.”

“I’m sorry, sugar,” he kisses the side of my head, near my temple.

“It’s for the best.  She did what she had to do to make sure we were both set free.”

We both sat there, together but alone in our thoughts.

“Things go how I see ‘em goin’ sugar, I want you to meet my boy,” Roam surprises me by saying.

“I’d like that, a lot.  Are you and uh, his mom…Are you on friendly terms?”

He gives me a squeeze around my shoulders.  “Yeah, sugar.  Amy and me, we never had a relationship.  She was just a piece of ass ‘til I knocked her up.  We got a good thing goin’ on and it works for us.  Jasper’s happy and content ‘cause there’s no animosity between his parents.  I have him every other weekend and some night’s durin’ the week, when I’m not busy.”

“That’s good.  You sound like a good dad,” I muse.

“Doin’ my best.  Didn’t have a father so fuck if I know
if I’m doin’ it right, but I’m doin’ my best.”

“I never asked you about the shooting,” I mention quietly.

He sighs.  “Can’t tell you much – it’s club business.  Many years ago the club was into illegal shit.  Stuff went down and a bunch of rival club members ended up dead.  That shooting was one of the dead member’s grandkids retaliating.  Stupid prick is only a teenager.  Enlisted a bunch of his buddies to help him.”

“Did you hurt him?”  I ask, horrified at the thought.

His body shakes.  “No, sugar.  You gotta understand, not all MC’s are outlaws.  The one thing we do all share, is the bond of the brotherhood.  We met with the Prez of the other club and he’s going to handle it.  He knows we’re not happy, but he also knows we don’t want friction between the clubs.  He’s as pissed off as we are, because we’re all on the same page.  The kid will think twice about going off halfcocked in the future, that’s for sure.”

“You do know my name is Lacey, right?  Not Sugar.”  I attempt to lighten the mood.

“Yeah, I know,” he chuckles.  “But you’re sweet as fuckin’ sugar.”

I smile to myself as I think, I might be done running.  Maybe it’s time to stay.

1 month later

I groan and roll over.  My hand automatically seeks out Roam.  I stretch it out and pat the bed, searching for him.  But his side is cold.  I open my eyes and look around, then I smell bacon.  A pan clatters and I hear a few
shits
and
fucks
uttered.  Just as I’m about to get up, the door slowly creaks open and he walks in.  Jeans slung low on his hip, no shirt, man-V and tattoos on display, and black hair wet from the shower. 
Delicious.

“Mornin’,” he grins.

I lick my lips as my eyes travel his body.  “Good morning,” I reply cheerily.

He walks in and sets
the breakfast tray over my lap.  “You’re spoiling me,” I remark.

“You’re worth it,” he says, before placing a tender kiss to my lips.

He pulls back and I look down.  He’s made scrambled eggs, biscuits and bacon.  Plus there’s coffee and orange juice.

“Mmmm, this smells divine,” I moan, before taking a bite.

He watches me as I eat.  I’ll admit, it’s a little creepy, but the food is so good, I don’t really care.

“Where did you learn to cook?” I ask, when I’m finished.

“Mom wasn’t big on cookin’ and I was tired of eating canned food and bread, so I took it upon myself to start experimenting.”

“You’re good at it,” I compliment him.

“You can thank me,” he replies, on a lip twitch.

“Thank you,” I say, sweetly.

“Naw, I think you can do better than that.”

“Oh, really?” I make my eyes wide and I put on my best innocent vo
ice, at the same time as I drag my finger tip from my belly, up my stomach to swirl around my nipple and then up to my mouth, where I suck on it.

“Yeah, re
ally.”  His voice is husky and my core clenches at the sound of it.

“What makes you so sure?”  I climb onto my knees and straddle his legs.  His eyes are glued to my breast.  I’m wearing a white tank top and loose pajama bottoms.  I know my nipples are showing through the top because his eyes haven’t left the area.  I watch as he stares at them, his eyes getting darker and hungrier with each second that passes.  His erection presses into me and I rock against him, almost imperceptibly.

His hands go to my ass and he palms my cheeks before his mouth lowers and he drags his tongue around my nipples.  His saliva wets the fabric and I look down to see what he’s done.  He has only wet the nipple part, so the rest of my shirt is fine, but where my nipples are is now see thru.

“That’s better,” he gives me the dimples, obviously pleased with himself.

I grind myself into him and revel when I hear his gasp.  “That’s better,” I mimic.

Then, I’m flying through the air and I land on the bed wit
h a thump.  His body covers me and then his lips come down to join with mine.  I open my mouth as his tongue seeks entrance.  It sweeps in and tangles with mine in an erotic dance.  His erection digs painfully into my thigh and I’m reminded of how much I want him.  My hands trace down his inked ribs and once I reach the waist of his jeans, I trace the fabric around until I meet the button.  I pull the zipper down and then push his pants down around his ass.  He sits up on his knees and looks down at me.  “Please,” I pant.  “I need you.”

“So fuckin’ beautiful,” he murmurs, before he pulls my pants down my legs.  I drag my top over my head and chuck it off to the side.  Then, his body covers mine and we moan in unison as he slides effortlessly inside my soaking entrance.

His tongue captures my nipple again and I gasp when he bites down before kissing and licking the sting away.

“Oh god.”  I lift my hips to meet his thrusts as he pumps furiously into me.  Then, I dig my heel into the bed and roll us over, so I’m on top of him.  I sink down on him until he’s seated fully inside me, making him groan as his eyes rol
l back in his head.  He takes my hands and I begin to ride him.  I rise slowly, before slamming down and grinding hard against him.

He takes our joined hands and moves them to my clit, where we rub my swollen
flesh together.

“Come for me, sugar,” he rumbles.  I fly over the edge and collapse onto his chest, heaving as the force of my orgasm travels through my body.

He flips us again, but this time I’m on my knees.  Gripping my hips, Roam slams into me so hard I’m sure I’ll have have bruises on my ass cheeks from the force of his blows, but still, I push back against him.  Thirty seconds later, I’m screaming out again as my whole body contracts.  I tighten around his cock so hard, I’m sure it must be painful for him.  He hisses, “
Fuck
,” and stills inside me.  I feel his cock jerk as warm fluid fills me.  We fall flat onto the bed as we try to regain our breath.

“Wow,” is all I can manage.

“Now
that
was a thank you.”

My body shakes as I laugh quietly.  “It sure was,” I agree.

~*~

“Are you sure I look okay?”

“Sugar, you look fine.  He’s four, he’s not gonna care what you’re wearin’.”

“I know that, but I still want to look good.”

“You look fuckin’ sexy,” he says, eyeing my tight, medium blue distressed jeans and turquoise halter.

“I don’t want to look
sexy
, Roam.  I want to look…I don’t know, grown up, or
mature
, or something. 
Not
sexy.”

He laughs at me and tugs my hand, leading us toward his truck.  I’m nervous.  I can’t stop fidgeting.  Today I get to meet Jasper, Roam’s four
-year-old son.

We drive for around an hour before we pull into a tidy, quiet street.  Roam turns into the drive of a well maintained double brick home.  As soon as he cuts the engine, the front door swings open and a handsome little boy comes tearing out screaming, “Daddy.”  Roam swoops him into his arms and throws him in the air before holding him tight to his chest.

“Missed you, bud,” I hear him say.

“Missed you too, Daddy.  Who’s that?” He asks, pointing to me.

“This is my friend, Lacey.  Remember, I told you about her,” Roam answers.

“Oh yeah, I remember.  Hi, Lacey,” he waves.

“Hey, Jasper,” I smile, the nerves slowly leaving my body.  He looks just like Roam – dark skin, twinkling blue eyes, but with blonde hair instead of black.  He’s beautiful.

“Can we go now, Dad?”  He asks, excitedly.

“Yep. Go say ‘bye to your mom.”

Jasper runs off and Roam looks to me.  “He looks just like you,” I smile.

“He’s a good kid.”

“Do you need to go in and visit with Amy before we go?”

Before he can answer, Jasper comes racing out with a back pack slung over his little shoulders.  Behind him, a woman is yelling at him to slow down.  She’s got a smile on her face though, and the way she says the words and looks at the child, you just know he means the world to her. 

“Hey, Ro,” she goes up on her tip toes to give his cheek a kiss.

“Amy, how you doin’?”

“Doin’ good.  How y’all doin?”

“Good, thanks,” I smile.

“This is Lacey.  Lacey this is Amy,” Roam introduces us.

“Hey,” I give a little wave.

“Hey, Lacey.  Nice to meet you.”

“You too.  You’ve got a gorgeous boy,” I say, genuinely.

“Why, thank you.  You’re too kind.”
  She flashes a brilliant white smile at me.  She’s pretty, in a girl-next-door kind of way, and she’s got that Southern charm down pat.

“Jump in, buddy.”  Roam helps Jasper up into the back seat and we wave to Amy as we drive away.

Not long later, Roam pulls into a park.  Jasper hasn’t stopped talking the entire drive.  I now know he loves Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Spongebob.  He also likes anything with chocolate in it, especially his dad’s chocolate pancakes, which, he told me, Roam makes him every Sunday when he is at his dad’s house.  He also likes his bacon extra crispy and he absolutely
loves
his father’s motorcycle. He gabbed nonstop about everything bike related.  Roam just smiled like a proud dad and I nodded along, pretending I knew what he was talking about.

As soon as the truck comes to a halt, Jasper jumps out and runs across to the slide.  I take the picnic basket from the back, while Roam gets the tartan blanket.  We find a shady spot under a tree and lay out the supplies.

“He’s a great kid,” I remark as I watch him swing across the monkey bars.

“Amy’s done a good job raisin’ him.”

“You have too,” I tell him earnestly.  I’m shocked that he would think he has had nothing to do with how well rounded his son is.

He doesn’t reply, he just continues watching Jasper play.

~*~

“C’mon down here, Jasper, and have yourself some lunch,” I call out. 

He jumps down from the equipment and runs over.  Collapsing on the grass, puffing and panting, he takes a long chug of water before wiping the sweat from his forehead.

“You want a sub, buddy?  Lacey made ‘em all herself this morning,” Roam asks him.

“Yum!” He shout.  “I love subs.  They’re my favorite kind of lunch.  Did you put tomato on mine? I hate tomato. Dad says girls like boys who eat tomatoes, but I don’t want girls liking me anyways,” he rattles on.

“No,” I chuckle, “I didn’t put tomatoes on yours.  Just meat and cheese with Ranch.  Your dad said that was your favorite.”

“Yeah,” he nods furiously, “I love that.” 

I hand him his sub and he takes a large bite.  “This is so good.  Thanks Lacey.”  His words come out all garbled because of his full mouth but I still smile at him indulgently and say, “Glad you like it, sweetheart.”

I hand Roam his sub and then dig into my own.

After we’ve finished eating
, Jasper runs off to play again and I lay my head down in Roam’s lap.

“It’s so peaceful here,” I murmur.

“I used to play here when I was a kid.  We didn’t live far away.  Me and a couple of other kids from my neighborhood would come down here and run amok.”

“I can imagine,” I laugh.  “I wasn’t
allowed to do much during my childhood, so I don’t have any funny or exciting stories.”

“Come on, I’ll show you something,” he stands, taking my hand and hoisting me up alongside him.  We walk over to a large tree that has a bunch of carvings in the trunk.  He walks around the back and traces his finger over some of the words, before he stops on one particular carving.

“I did this when I was about twelve.”  He points to the writing.  ROAM WAS ‘ERE. 1996.             

Then, he takes his pocket knife from his belt and begins
slicing into the bark.  As I watch him, my eyes slowly begin to cloud over as my vision blurs.  When he is done, he blows the excess sawdust away and brushes over his art work a couple of times using his hand.  He turns to me, looking proud of himself.  There, carved in the tree in supersized letters, encased in an even bigger heart, is:

R C

  4

L M

“Aw, big bad biker boy has a soft spot,” I say through my tears.

He pulls me into his arms and swipes away the wetness on my cheeks.  “Only for you, sugar.”  He gently kisses my lips, before he whispers words that change everything.  “Been dreaming of you, Lacey.  Never thought I’d be a man to settle down, but you’re different.  You make me want things I never thought I’d want.  I love you, sugar.”

A sob escapes my throat.  I’ve only ever heard those three words from two other people – Jenn and my mom.  I know I love Roam back.  Slowly, almost imperceptibly, over the last few months, he has wormed his way into my heart.  Now, when I think of my future, it makes my chest ache, to think of him not being in it. 
That’s
how I know I love him, I can’t imagine my life without him.   We’ve spent every spare moment together since the night he said he wanted to be with me.  When he’s not doing club business, we’re together, either at his place or Jenn’s.  Sometimes we just drive to the beach and lay on the sand all day.  Sometimes we talk, other times we just enjoy each other.

“I love you, too,” I say through another sob.

“Glad, sugar,” he says softly.

If there is a word for fuller than full, then that’s how I feel.  I feel so full I might burst.  Full of love, of happiness, of
peace.
 

Roam calls out to Jasper, and I pack up our picnic, then we drive back to Roam’s for a movie afternoon.

…So full I might burst…