Finding Love at Home (The Beiler Sisters) (36 page)

Ida breathed deeply as they walked into the kitchen. She hadn’t planned on having this conversation so soon, but why not? Wilma had a right to ask. Ida was, after all, the new woman coming in to take charge of the household. And she did want a close relationship with Wilma. So what better time than now to begin?

“Maybe we’d better sit down.” Ida motioned toward a chair and took one herself. “When your
daett
first showed an interest in me, I immediately thought about how the two of us, if we got together, could raise your uncle Melvin’s children. But marriage is holy, and it requires much more than wanting to help someone else. I suffered a lot with the death of your uncle Melvin. I thought
Da Hah
had led me to him, and that we would be spending our days getting old together and raising the children.”

Ida gave Wilma a quick glance to gauge her interest level. Had she said too much? No, the girl appeared interested.

Wilma reached over and touched Ida’s arm. “I can only imagine the sorrow you felt.”

Ida continued. “After that I wasn’t so concerned about feelings or what I thought life should be like. When your
daett
noticed me after the funeral and I could see his interest, I couldn’t think of any reason why I shouldn’t say
yah
. I knew he needed more help. And after we talked and he said he was willing to bring all of Melvin’s children to live with us, I knew it would be a
gut
situation. Isn’t that how
Da Hah
works? And soon
Da Hah
gave me love for your
daett
and all of you on top of everything else.” Ida stopped as she blushed. She decided that was enough to say. Wilma would have to be satisfied.

Wilma, though, wasn’t finished. “Have you ever loved someone who didn’t love you back?”

Ida met the girl’s gaze. “Oh, Wilma, is that what you’re going through? The boy you’re interested in doesn’t return the feeling?
Yah
, I once did love someone who didn’t return my love.”

A tear glittered in Wilma’s eye, but she quickly wiped it away. “I don’t know. But he… ”

“I know it’s hard. It will be okay, sweetheart.” The words spilled out of Ida. “You have nothing to worry about.
Da Hah
will see that the right man loves you someday. If it’s not to be this one, you can trust
Da Hah
. He knows what’s right.”

Wilma studied her face. “You know of this then?”

Ida winced. “
Yah
, I know of it well.”

A soft smile spread over Wilma’s face. “Thank you, Ida. I’m glad you’ve come to help us. Our lives will be better for having you here.”

Now I will cry, Ida thought. She stood up and wrapped Wilma in a tight hug. Ben interrupted them a minute later when he cleared his throat from the kitchen doorway. “Is supper coming up anytime soon?”

“Men!” Ida huffed as she wiped her eyes. “They never give women a moment’s peace.”

Ben laughed and disappeared.

“Thanks for loving my
daett
,” Wilma whispered. The two embraced again.

Thirty-Six

D
ebbie slipped out of the house toward the barn. It was Wednesday, and she shouldn’t have waited this long, but she’d wanted to be sure lest she act in haste. Even now she really didn’t have the time for this with all the work that needed doing. And yet this had to be done. Emery had shown an interest again in Crystal at Ida’s wedding, and Debbie couldn’t live with herself another moment if she didn’t at least speak with Crystal. Emery obviously had a soft spot for the woman. Bishop Beiler evidently believed Crystal had the same interest she had about joining the church. But it wasn’t the same at all! Debbie was sure disaster was lying in wait if some things weren’t corrected.

Maybe it had been Ida’s wedding day and the sight of Lois there without her husband that had finally made it clear to Debbie. Whatever the reason, urgency had risen up inside her. She must speak with Crystal before an unmarried Amish man fell for her, especially if it was Emery!

She entered the barn and approached Emery as he fed the cows. “Emery, I need the address where Crystal is staying.”

“And why’s that?” Emery asked in surprise.

“I want to speak with her. I saw you with her at Ida’s wedding.”

“
Yah.
” Emery chuckled. “What do you plan to do?”

She frowned. “Emery, I just don’t like this situation. Someone has to talk sense into that woman, seeing as you don’t seem to comprehend the danger.”

“You think I’m going to fall in love with her?” He smiled. “You’re worried I might love her?” he asked with a sly grin.

Debbie held out a piece of paper and a pen. “I know she has relatives in the area and is staying with them. Please write down the address.”

He scribbled on the paper.

Her heart sank. Despite her bravado, she was hoping he didn’t know it.

He handed back the paper. “You’ve got this all thought out, it seems.”

She ignored the comment. “Yes, I do. Someone has to speak to her.”

Emery shrugged. “She’s not staying with a family in the community. She hasn’t behaved in a questionable way as far as I know—in the community or outside. You can’t just order a person away. Especially one who is seeking faith and peace. Be careful.”

She hesitated. “How do you know where she lives?”

Emery met her gaze. “It’s common knowledge, Debbie. My knowing means nothing.”

Yes, it does
. She almost said it aloud, but managed to hold it in. She went instead to catch and harness Buttercup.

Emery helped her, but they said nothing more. They hitched the horse to the buggy, and Debbie climbed in. When she turned down the driveway, she saw him standing in front of the barn watching her drive out.

This morning Debbie had almost spilled her plans to Saloma, but she doubted if Saloma would think Crystal’s presence was a matter of concern. Why was everyone so blind when it came to
Crystal? Did they think because they’d been wrong about her, that they might also be wrong about Crystal? Debbie pulled up for a stop sign. As usual, blame for all
Englisha
things eventually landed back on her.

She shouldn’t blame Saloma for her lack of interest when it came to Crystal. Saloma was still mourning the loss of Ida not being at home. They hadn’t spoken of it, but Debbie knew. Adam and Saloma were both struggling to establish a new routine now that all three of their girls were married and gone… now that Debbie was the only girl to help on the farm. Saloma bore the brunt of the loss of Ida since she’d assumed Ida’s chores.

Debbie pushed her thoughts away and turned on the lane toward the small town of Penns Creek. Buttercup settled into a comfortable gait that would eat up the distance. Debbie’s thoughts drifted back to Ida’s wedding and her time with Phillip. She sighed. She really didn’t want to think about the man. She wouldn’t allow herself to fall for an unobtainable dream again. Alvin had taught her that much. Her heart still needed healing before she could ever consider another man. Phillip would return to Lancaster next Thursday for Lily’s wedding. Debbie had agreed to sit with him at the hymn singing in the evening when all the Amish youth were paired up with someone. With that ahead of her, she might as well think about him. The evening wasn’t a date, which is why she’d agreed to it. She would have to sit with someone, so why not Phillip Kanagy? He probably felt the same way, so that was that. Phillip would have come straight out and asked her for a date if he was interested in her that way. It wasn’t like he was shy. The man could handle himself quite well.

Paul would be disappointed that she wasn’t available to sit with him. But he shouldn’t be. She’d told him she wasn’t interested in romance with him. She hadn’t given him any encouragement even though he continued to express affection for her. Yet Paul was more humble since his accident. He’d come down some from his high
horse. And he was a known quantity. But that wasn’t enough. She would never marry him.

So why shouldn’t she consider Phillip? Was she frightened of being in another relationship? She didn’t really know Phillip, but that was why one dated someone. Debbie thought of Emery in the barn this morning and sighed. She was realizing she was drawn to this man who was almost a brother to her. That was the real problem. She had no right to think of Emery as a possible husband, and so soon after Alvin. What was wrong with her? Why was she so tempted with something that couldn’t happen? Yet, Emery was a real man, a solid man, and that’s why she was on her way to see Crystal. Emery couldn’t ever be her husband, but if she could help it neither would Crystal. Crystal was not what was best for Emery.

Debbie sighed. Why she was dwelling on men and romance, she had no idea. She still needed time to heal from the treatment Alvin had given her. But here she was, with the attentions of a possible new beau in front of her—and the wrong one at that. If anyone knew that she harbored even the slightest interest in Emery as a husband she’d be the outcast of the community for sure. “Gold digger” wouldn’t come close to what she’d be called.

Debbie pulled to a stop at the lone stop sign in Penns Creek. Enough of Phillip Kanagy. She would deal with him later. She turned left after the road cleared and found the address. An open parking spot was next door, so she tied Buttercup to a telephone pole there.

Going up to the house, Debbie knocked.

The door was opened by a woman who appeared friendly. “May I help you?” she asked.

Debbie smiled. “I was wondering if I might speak with Crystal?”

“You’re in luck. Crystal just came home from Mifflinburg.” She held out her hand. “I’m Margaret. Crystal’s been such a nice boarder. Are you a friend?”

“No, I’m just… an acquaintance. My name is Debbie.” Had Crystal lied about having family in the area?

Margaret ushered Debbie into the living room. “Crystal! Someone is here to see you.”

Footsteps came down the hall immediately. Crystal exclaimed, “Debbie! What a nice surprise!”

Debbie’s resolve wavered. “Good morning. I thought I’d stop by to see you… and talk.” Crystal was a beautiful woman, even more beautiful in her
Englisha
clothing. She’d been beautiful in Philadelphia, Debbie remembered. No wonder both Alvin and Emery had fallen for her.

“You want to talk?” Crystal was puzzled, but she motioned upstairs. “My room is up there.”

Debbie followed her after a brief nod to Margaret. Crystal held the bedroom door open, and Debbie took the only chair in the room.

Crystal made herself comfortable on the bed. “So what brings you here?”

They could be two sisters meeting for an evening talk before retiring, Debbie thought. Only they weren’t. This was much more dangerous business than that, and the stakes were much higher.

Debbie gathered her thoughts. “I know we see each other at church, but let me explain who I am and why I’m here. I first saw you in Philadelphia with Alvin. I’d driven there to talk to him, but he wasn’t home. Alvin and I had been interested in each other before he left for Philadelphia. I was waiting outside in my car when Alvin, you, and a large dog walked toward the apartment building. I was so shocked I didn’t even get out of my car. Oh, in case you’re wondering, I was driving a car because I originally came from the outside world—the
Englisha
world, as the Amish would say.”

Crystal nodded. “I knew you were Alvin’s ex-girlfriend, and that you came from… our world. But I didn’t know about Philadelphia. That is interesting.”

Debbie continued. “I’m here, Crystal, because I want to straighten some things out. Things can’t go on like they have been. No one else has told you this, I’m sure, but I’ll be direct. You will never be allowed to marry an Amish man. Within the Amish faith a man cannot wed a divorced woman.”

Crystal raised her eyebrows. “I realize that. I’ve read some of the
Ordnung
rules and studied the Amish people. I know every community is different though.”

“If you join the community, are you prepared to live as a single woman?”

Crystal gazed out of the bedroom window. “I haven’t decided about joining. There is another option, you know.”

Debbie looked puzzled a moment, and then she gasped. “You wouldn’t do that. You couldn’t!”

Crystal smiled. “Maybe, maybe not. I have a right to happiness. Even with an ex-Amish man. It’s happened before, you know. An Amish man leaving the community isn’t the end of the world. You and I both know that.”