Finding Peace (Finding Series Book 1) (27 page)

Tessa jumps up and hugs her dad. “Thank you, Daddy.”

Troy looks at me waiting for my answer.

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good. Get out of here before, you are late. Drive safely.”

“Yes, Sir.” We answer in unison, laughing because we hadn’t done that in a while.

We get in the car to leave for school. “Tessa, I’m sorry you have to baby-sit me.”

She jerks her head to look at me. “Kayla, this is about your safety. I don’t mind helping you or having to stay with you. Besides, we get to eat at
What-A-Burger
. It’s been so long I’ve forgotten what the burgers even taste like.

What-A-Burger
is one of our favorite places to eat. They have the best burgers and shakes. We haven’t eaten there recently, because there isn’t one close to the Lake House. It’ll be fun to go tomorrow.

“Do you think that it was David that attacked you yesterday?” Tessa asks me.

“Honestly, I don’t know. I hope that he wouldn’t be capable of doing something like that.” I look out my window, trying not to let Tessa see the concern on my face.

“I didn’t want to say anything to Dad. I didn’t tell him about the confrontation with him yesterday either but I think you should tell him. Did you mention it to the police when they questioned you?”

“No. Maybe I should have though.”

Tessa lets out a frustrated breath. “Ya think? Kayla you should have told them. This is serious stuff we’re dealing with.”

“I just didn’t think about it at the time. I’ll be more careful.” I look at her and she looks a little scared. “Promise. Okay?”

“We’ll be more careful. I’ll be right by your side.”

My day at school goes by in a blur without any of the complications I had the day before. When we make it home. We clean up the house, do our homework, and eat supper.

Tomorrow is my appointment with my counselor and I haven’t had time to look at the scriptures she gave me or think about what I want and who I am.

I pull out my Bible and turn to
Jeremiah 29:11… For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

So, God has a plan for my life. A life with hope and a future. I’m not perfect. I fail, don’t do what I’m supposed to do every day. I go against His teachings which makes me feel so unworthy of His love.

Next I turn to
Proverbs 3:5-6… Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.

Both of these scriptures are telling me to trust Him. That I don’t have to have all the answers I just have to have faith and trust in Him.

So, why the questions about who I am and what I want. Truthfully, I have never really known who I am. Not knowing who my biological parents are has always made me question this. What kind of people were they? Am I like them? Then losing my adoptive parents because of their divorce made me lose myself even more.

I want a family and to be loved. A man who loves me and our children beyond belief. The type of love that never dies. It doesn’t have to be perfect, just unbreakable. A career where I can still be a mother and wife would be ideal for me. I’ve never been someone who wanted to be in the rat race. I would be happy simply taking care of my husband and children. Yes, I want children more than anything, when the time is right. I put my Bible away. Have a silent talk with God and call it a night.

My alarm goes off and I go about my morning routine. Tessa and I take my car to school today because we took hers yesterday. We try to alternate. Tessa hates my driving. I laugh at her on the way to school. I’m a cautious driver and she, well, let's just say isn’t.

“Come on Grandma, put your foot on the gas or we will never make it to school.”

“Chill Earnhardt. We’ll get there.” She crosses her arms over her chest. She isn’t an Earnhardt fan, she likes Jeff Gordon. So I’m sure being called Earnhardt isn’t sitting well with her.

“Whatever! Just drive. I’d like to see Asher before class starts.”

I laugh at her pouting. “Yes, Princess.”

The day goes by without any problems again. So I’ve relaxed. I guess me being attacked was just a fluke. We haven’t seen David again either. I’m very thankful for that also.

Tessa and I walk out to my car together as we cross the street to go to the student parking lot Tessa grabs my arm.

“Look who’s by your car.”

I look over and I can’t see anyone.

“Hold on. Damn people get out of the way.”

Students are everywhere and it’s hard to see my car since it’s parked a few rows back. They have finally cleared a little and I have a clear view of my Honda. “Damn it! What does he want now?”

“Kayla, we are supposed to go call the police. Come on lets go.”

Nah. I’m done with this. I’m sick of him interrupting my life with his craziness. “No. You can go call if you want, but I’m going to give him a piece of my mind.”

“Kayla, no we promised Dad.”

I’m not listening I’m walking toward my car and David.

“At least let me get the guys first. Kayla! Kayla! Stop!”

If I stop now I’ll chicken out. I keep walking. He is leaning on my car. When he sees me approaching, he stands up tall. You aren’t going to intimidate me today, jerk. “What do you want? I thought you were already told to leave me alone.”

He twists his neck around like he is trying to stretch it. He then scans the parking lot and brings his eyes back to me. “Where’s your buddies?”

“I’m right here.” Tessa says. Stepping up beside me. “And the rest are on their way.”

“We don’t need you here, Tessa. I want to talk to Kayla alone.”

Tessa steps between us. “In no way, shape or form is that going to happen. So if you’ve got something to say, say it. We have things to do.”

“Kayla, I just want to talk to you. Don’t you think you at least owe me that?”

He’s trying to give me those sad eyes that I used to give into all the time.
Not going to work anymore buddy. You need to move the hell on.
“I don’t owe you anything. And if you need to talk then talk. You have five minutes max.”

“You are still driving the car I bought you so if for nothing else than that you owe me more than five minutes. What’s the problem? You already screwing somebody else?”

I can’t control myself, I pull my hand back and slap him across his face. My hand is stinging. David grabs my hand and pulls me to him with his other hand he grabs my hair. This has all happened so fast. My head and hand are killing me. Tessa has started hitting David as hard as she can.

“Let her go you S.O.B. I’ll kill you. I promise I will.”

“Tessa!” Asher is running at us at full force. I can see him out of the corner of my eye.

“Let me tell you something you little whore. You’re going to get what’s coming to you. If I can’t have you no one will. I’ll find his punk ass and he will pay for trying to take you.”

I kick him in the shin. “I’m not yours. I never will be.”

He sees Asher and Brandon running across the street, David takes off and jumps in a black car that is still running with someone in the driver's seat waiting on him.

“What the hell was that? Did he hit either one of you?”

“No. He didn’t hit us. He didn’t even touch Tessa, but she sure got some licks in on him. David didn’t even touch me until I slapped him.” Tessa is hugging me now. I’m shaking, but I’m more mad than upset.

“Why did you, slap him?” Brandon asks.

“He basically called me a whore, then after I hit him, he actually did call me one.”

“That guy has some real issues.” Asher says shaking his head. He is checking Tessa as he speaks making sure she is okay.

“I’m fine baby really. Let’s go to the library until it’s time for Kayla’s appointment. Then we are going to go to
What-A-Burger
. We aren’t going to let him ruin our day.”

“Don’t y’all think you should report this? I mean what if he tries something else and no one is around?” Brandon seems concerned for us.

“That’s why we aren’t ever going to be alone.” I state. “Come on. I have some stuff I need to work on for my Honors English.”

“I don’t like this at all.” Asher says.

We make our way to the public library and work until it’s time for us to leave for my appointment.

Kayla

I walk into Claire’s office and sit in the same chair as last time. Her office is a calm setting not something you would expect in a counselor's office. It looks airy and relaxing. The chairs are a pale blue with white flowers. I’m surprised she has such light colored furniture, considering so many people come in and sit on it, it could so easily get dirty. She has hardwood floors with a huge tan area rug and the walls are a light cream color. Her desk is a white washed light wood with a marble top that has the same blue and tan colors swirled in it. There are also some beautiful spring flower arrangements in vases throughout the room. I’m in love with this office. Blake should use these colors in his house. The thought of him and his house causes me to unconsciously smile.

I had been too nervous to pay attention to the office decor last time I was here. Today, I’m surprisingly calm, even after my encounter with David. My hand is still hurting, however, it felt good to hit him. How dare he call me that. He was the only person I had been with until Blake. David knows I’m not like that. I waited over a year before I was with him and then…. I can’t go there.

Claire comes over and sits in the seat across from me. “Hi, Kayla. How have you been doing the last couple of days?”

“I’m good. I read my scriptures and I thought about what you said.” She is writing some in a book she has. I’d love to get a hold of that to see what she is writing about me.

“And, what do you think? Did you come up with some answers?”

Finally being able to stand up to David has given me courage. But even more than that just meeting Blake has caused me to look at things differently. I’m always trying so hard to please everyone else, I’ve forgotten that I should be happy too. So, here goes. Since, I’m feeling stronger I’m going to spill my guts here.

“I think the scripture was telling me that even though I don’t know what’s going on that I need to trust the Lord, because he has a plan for my life. That I need to trust in him and rely on him and not myself.”

“Very good Kayla. That’s very insightful for someone your age.”

I’m smiling back at her. “My grandmother was adamant about making me go to Church and teaching me God’s word. She is really an amazing woman. She was there for me when nobody else was. I don’t know where I would be today without her intervention in my life. I make mistakes, but I always hear her voice trying to guide me. Sometimes I listen and sometimes I don’t.” I laugh and Claire just smiles at me.

“What about the questions I told you to think about?”

I twist my hands together. How am I going to answer this? “I’m not exactly sure who Kayla Jameson is except that I believe in God and I have a strong faith. I’m a loyal friend, a people pleaser, I can’t stand for someone to dislike me. Not knowing my biological parents means I don’t know what background I came from, which really bothers me. I want a family of my own to love and be loved back. I don’t really care about a career as long as my job will allow me to be there for my family, I’ll be happy. I want a love that will never die. Oh, I should probably mention that I’m a hopeless romantic.” I blush a little when I look up and she is smiling widely at me.

“There is nothing wrong with any of that Kayla it’s a normal reaction. Do you think that you want that kind of love because your parents didn’t have that? You, didn’t see that from your biological or adoptive parents.”

I scrunch up my forehead. I never thought of it that way. “I don’t know, maybe?”

“I can’t answer that for you, but maybe it’s something you should think about. How are things with Blake?”

Blake two more days and I get to see him. My heart aches for him. How I long to have his arms around me and to kiss those beautiful full lips of his. “I haven’t spoken to him. I should be getting a letter from him soon. I suspect that he is working at his job and on building his house.” There she goes writing again. Why does she have to write down everything?

“He’s building a house?”

I smile from ear to ear. “Yes and I just know it’s going to be amazing. He’s asked me to move there with him after graduation.” She is examining my face with her eyes. She knows something is wrong. Dang it. Can’t get anything past her.

“How do you feel about that?”

Of course, she would ask that. “I have a few problems with that idea. Number one, I don’t like the idea of living with someone without being married. It wasn’t the way I was raised. I’ve had sex out of marriage with two different men now. My guilt over that has caused me a lot of sleepless nights. I’ve felt really bad about it, however, being with Blake feels so right. It’s like he is my other half, but I know it’s wrong. Number two, we haven’t known each other long, which means we do not know each other well enough to be married. Therefore we shouldn’t be getting married either.”