Finding Sunshine (19 page)

~:~:~:~:~

“You’re really talented you know,” Aaron says, running his fingertips up and down my naked spine. I shiver with pleasure.

“I think that was mostly you,” I giggle, rubbing my face on his chest and cuddling up closer to his delicious, naked warmth.

After a family dinner, Harry was put to bed early, and Aaron and I came downstairs to give Sarah and Bennett sometime together—alone. We didn’t have much trouble entertaining ourselves, mostly doing it naked.

“No. I’m serious, about your photography. I really think you should go into business, and create your own company.”

“It’s all Mr. Snappy, really.” I give into large yawn and pull the blankets more firmly around our bodies.

“Mr. Snappy?”

“Yes.” I say, tucking my face into his neck in embarrassment. “That’s what I named my camera.”

“You named your
camera
?” I can feel his rumbling chuckle beneath me, and I know he’s clearly thinking that I’m totally cray-cray.

Great, just what I want.

“Of course,” I defend myself lamely.

“Of course.” He mimics, chuckling again, turning us on our sides and burying his face in my hair as he holds me, if at all possible, closer to him.

“Doesn’t your truck have a name?” I ask, pulling away slightly to see his grinning face.

Goddess, he has a great smile!

“No,” he chuckles, and then says more seriously, “well, you and Mr. Snappy make a great team.”

“Thanks.” I feel my face heat, blushing at his honest praise. “Even though we’re doing two completely different things, I did talk to Sarah about how she got started. And we bounced around some ideas of things I could do.”

“Good. I’ll help you make your dreams come true, any way I can. All you need to do is ask.” He kisses my nose and then forehead sweetly.

“Thank you.”

Golly, I don’t deserve him!

“You know, I wouldn’t mind you taking pictures of me sometime,” he says, ending with a devilish smile. “Naked.”

“You mean, like making a video?” I ask, unable to disguise the distaste in my tone.
I’m up for a lot of things. But being the co-star in a sex tape is not one of them. I don’t care how
private
you think it will be. All good intentions aside, something always happens, and it eventually gets leaked online. The next thing you know, you’ve got a million views on
YouTube
and you can’t look your family in the eye over the dinner table.

“Fuck, no!” he says vehemently. I relax, relieved that he feels the same way. “If we want to watch ourselves, we’ll get some mirrors.”

“I like that idea,” I say breathlessly, my eyes wide with excitement at the thought of watching him as he pounds pleasurably into me.

“So do I,” he agrees, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “We’re clearly compatible.”

“I think so.” I inch closer to tease his lips with my tongue, waiting to be invited inside. Soon we are slowly, deeply tasting one another. I run my hand along his neck, my thumb rubbing against his unshaven jaw.

Ending the lazy, tender assault, I lay my head back on his shoulder and snuggle into his arms.

“How did you get into training dogs?”

“I just fell into it.” He answers coolly. Ever since we met, in the back of my mind I’ve been wondering about it. It’s not like you meet someone every day who’s in that profession. It seems like there must be an interesting story there.

“Really?” There has to be more to the story.
Why won’t he tell me?

“Yeah,” he replies, rolling my body over to face away from him. “We should go to sleep.”

“What’s the matter?”

Am I missing something?

“Nothing. It’s just been a long day, and I’m wiped.”

“Okay,” I say tentatively. “Goodnight.”

“’Night, Sunshine.” He pulls me tightly into the curve of his body and kisses the back of my neck, and I feel his warm hand caressing my abdomen gently. I lay there wondering if something was going on, or if I’m simply overreacting. I take comfort in the fact that Aaron’s holding me tightly in his arms—
not pushing me away
.

~ Aaron ~

“What the fuck?
I
could’ve made that shot!” Richard yells loudly at the television, throwing up his hands in disgust at the players on the screen.

It’s late Saturday afternoon and Richard, Arthur, and I are watching the Celtics get their asses handed to them on the huge television in Richard’s den.

Before joining the guys, I spent a majority of the day at the art museum with Nina. I’ll admit that walking around and stopping to stare at pictures isn’t my thing, but if her smile was any indication, my Sunshine had a great time
—
and that’s all that matters. Walking around, holding her delicate hand in my own, and staring at her observe the images made it worthwhile. Honestly, those old Hollywood stars don’t hold a candle to her pure, natural beauty. Once she had exhausted herself, we ate lunch, and then I dropped her back off at her apartment before heading over here to watch this frustrating game with the guys.

I may not be the best ball player, but I played enough in college to know that I could do better than the players out on the court tonight. Our team is getting destroyed, and it’s increasingly painful to watch. Despite the beer, snacks and male companionship, there’s no contest right now—I’d much rather be with my Nina.

“Hey, you still need a bartender next weekend?” I ask Richard during the commercial break.

“Yeah. You available?” he asks, looking excitedly at me.

“Thought maybe I could come in on Thursday and Friday nights if you need me to.” I reach over and pick my beer up from the coffee table, taking a long sip. The time has long since passed that I should have sucked it up and accepted Richard’s offer. I know I need to swallow my pride and work towards building a better life for myself. If I want any chance of having Nina in my life long term, I need to stop punishing myself and move forward.
Although I worry about what she’ll do once she finds out the truth about my past.

“Definitely. Can you come by at around 6:30 to help us open?” Richard continues happily.

“I'll be there.”

“Great,” he says, smiling at me and holding out the bowl of chips. Putting my beer down, I grab a handful and munch away.

“How’s it going with Nina?” Richard asks between sips of his beer.

“You’re still seeing her?” Arthur wonders out loud, turning to look at me from the other side of the couch.

“Yeah, and I really like her,” I admit happily, grabbing another handful of chips.

“It sounds like you
like
like her,” Richard teases, making Arthur chuckle and cough as he chokes on his beer.

“What are we, in junior high?” I roll my eyes, wondering how much shit those two are going to give me over my new relationship with Nina.

“It’s the perfect description.” Richard defends his comment, explaining, “You more than just like her, that’s plainly clear. But you’re not ready to say that you love her yet. You
like
like her.”

“Fuck man, it’s insane how fast I’m falling for her,” I confess, leaning back into the couch.

“Have you told her about your past?” Arthur asks, setting his beer on the coffee table and reaching for the bowl of chips.

“Fuck no!” I cry, sitting up straight and looking at him as if he’s gone completely insane.
Why the fuck would I do that? I want her to fucking like me, not run away as fast as her sexy ass legs will take her!

“How the fuck am I supposed to bring that up?” I demand, before asking rhetorically, “Should I just say, ‘Hey Nina, you look really nice today. Oh, by the way, I was in prison for two years.’ That’ll go over real fuckin’ well.”

Arthur has the decency to look contrite, even if he does roll his eyes at my dramatics.

“Does she know about your parents?” Richard asks.

“She knows they’re both gone.”

“I’d start there, then,” he states calmly.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, tell her the whole fuckin’ sob story. That way, when you get to the prison part, it doesn’t sound so incriminating,” Richard says, actually giving some sound advice. As much as I don’t want to admit it, the truth is that I know I have to tell her my story—
eventually
. If she hears it from someone else first, it could mean the end of us before we even begin.

Last night, when she was innocently asking about how I started training dogs, it became clear that she’s becoming increasingly interested in my past. Nina makes me feel like I could do anything, and I want to enjoy that high for a little while longer before I admit the truth—
that I’m not nearly good enough for her
.

“Yeah. I guess. Just please don’t say anything,” I almost beg, turning to look back and forth between my two friends.

“Don’t worry, man. Not my story to tell,” Arthur says, before draining the last of his beer.

“Neither will I, that’s on you. But you shouldn’t wait too long to tell her,” Richard says.

“I won’t. I just need to make sure she’s hooked first, before I bring
that
into the equation.”

“If it were me, I’d tell her sooner, rather than later,” Richard returns, telling me something that I already know but don’t want to hear.

“I know,” I practically snap at him, staring at the game. It has resumed on the television, but I’m not really seeing a thing.

“I don’t want you to fuck this up. She’s good for you,” Richard states seriously.

“She’s perfect. Fuck, man, is she
perfect
.” I relax a bit, turning to smile at him as thoughts of just how absolutely fucking perfect my woman is race through my mind.

“Oh, really?” Richard asks, his eyes wide and teasing.

“Yeah! All classy sweetness on the outside, and inside, she’s untamed wildness.” I reply enthusiastically, leaning back again into the couch.

“Really? Are we talking about the same woman?” Arthur asks, standing up and grabbing another beer from the mini-fridge across the room.

“Oh, yeah!” I state enthusiastically. I can’t help the huge smile that forms on my face. “I don’t think I'll ever have enough of her.”

“Fuck, she wasn’t like that for me,” Arthur grumbles into his beer, dropping back onto the couch.

What. The. Fuck?

“What the fuck are you talking about?” I demand angrily, sitting up straight and turning towards him.

“I thought you knew that Nina and I hooked up?” Arthur asks, his eyes wide with surprise.

“I fuckin’ did not,” I growl in anger.

“I told you they did, at the auction,” Richard says, looking at me like I’ve lost my mind.

“What? I thought you meant they had drinks together. You didn’t tell me he had sex with my woman!”

I’d sure as hell remember if he had said that!

“Talk about being hypocritical,” Arthur grumbles into his beer.

“What?” Richard and I both growl, and he at least has the decency to hold up his hands in mock surrender.

“Hush, lest the winds arise,” Arthur says calmly.

“Where the fuck do you get those from?” Richard demands, relaxing slightly. I turn to see a slight smile forming on his face. Fucker.
He wouldn’t be smiling if we were talking about Arthur having sex with his Rebecca.

“My Tutu gave me a proverb-a-day calendar for Christmas,” Arthur grins, taking a sip of his beer and returning to munching away on the snacks.

I cross my arms against my chest and grumble, “Let’s just watch the fuckin’ game.”

“Good idea. Here’s to forgetting we ever had this conversation,” Richard says diplomatically. Clearly reading my mood, he raises his beer slightly in emphasis.

Even though I’m still seething, I say tersely, “I agree.”

The game continues to play out on the screen, and as much as I try to focus on the players, all I can think about is Arthur with my Nina.
Seeing her gorgeous
body. Tasting her sweetness. Hearing her intimate, breathy sighs.
For the first time, I totally understand how Richard must have felt—
must feel
—about my past with Rebecca. It’s seriously messed up
.
If I didn’t like Arthur so much, or thought for one second he treated Nina badly, I’d kick the fucking shit out of him.

I can’t help but wonder about the other men Nina has hooked up with from the club. She mentioned that she’s been going there every Thursday, saying it’s to keep Rebecca company while Richard works.
But I wonder what happens once Richard and Rebecca go home?
The thought has me seeing red, nearly coming out of my skin with agitation. It’s like a rash on my heart, one that I can’t possibly scratch enough to find relief.

Nina is fucking mine!

~:~:~:~:~

“Is Nina home?” I demand when her roommate opens the door.

Once the game ended, I got into my truck and somehow found myself driving here instead of back to the house. I’m not sure exactly what I’m doing here, but I need to know that Nina is mine—
all mine
.

“Yes,” Jordan
—I
think that’s her name
—replies tersely, making no move to let me into the apartment.

“Thanks,” I say, pushing the door open and walking around her.

As I move briskly inside to Nina’s bedroom, I hear an indignant, “Where the fuck are you going?” from the woman behind me. I ignore her and pound on Nina’s door, taking a bit of my frustration out on the thin composite wood, making it rattle on the hinges.

The door quickly flies open, and Nina is standing there, her long hair loose and wild, wearing a large t-shirt—
my
t-shirt.

“Are you fuckin’ anyone else?” I demand of her, before she has a chance to say a word.

“
What
?” she asks startled, just as Jordan comes up behind me sneering coldly.

“I didn’t say you could come in.”

“It’s fine,” Nina snaps at Jordan, taking my hand and dragging me into her room, slamming the door closed behind us.

“Are you fuckin’ anyone else?” I ask her again, only marginally more calmly. Crossing my arms against my chest and glaring at her, I’m practically daring her to lie to me.

“Why would you ask me that?” she asks, mirroring my stance. If I hadn’t been so frustrated, I would have noticed that her eyes are wide and pained.

“Answer the question, Nina!” I snap at her.

“No! Okay? I'm not having sex with anyone else! Are
you
?” Nina leans forward and yells at me.

“Fuck no! I thought you and I were building something real between us,” I admit out loud, finally realizing why it’s bothering me so much. Despite my issues with not being good enough for Nina, I’ve really felt like we were starting something real.
Hopefully, something strong enough to withstand her knowledge of my past.

“So did I, so why are you asking me, then?” Nina asks softly, clearly in pain.

“Because I know you've hooked up with a bunch of guys at the club,” I growl, pointing my finger at her in emphasis.

“I can count the number of people I've
ever
slept with on one hand. Can
you
?” she asks. The accusation comes out in a deathly cold, angry voice. I’ve never heard her use that tone before—and I never want to hear it again.

Where did my sweet Nina go?

“What?”

“How many woman have you had sex with? What's your number? I bet you're more of a slut than you imagine I am,” she continues coldly.

“Don't say that. Don't you dare call my woman a slut!” I snap, stalking towards her. She puts her hand firmly on my chest, stopping me from taking her into my arms.

“Why not? You're practically calling me one!” she demands angrily, hitting my chest.

“I'm not. I would never say that about you, or call you names,” I argue back. I would never say such hateful or degrading things to my Nina.
Never.

“Fine. Whatever.” The fight having gone out of her, she finally allows me to pull her into my arms.

I may not be an expert on women, but having a sister, I do know that the words
fine
and
whatever
do not mean that you’ve been forgiven. This is not over; it just means that she’d rather not continue the argument. She’ll bring it up later, and you’ll have to deal with the issue all over again.
Fuck that!

“It’s not fine. I only want to be with you, Sunshine.” I say honestly, running my hands slowly along her back.

“And I only want to be with you,” Nina mumbles into my chest, moving to wrap her arms around me tightly.

“All right then, it’s settled. It’s just you and me,” I say, fisting her hair and pulling her head back enough to lean down and take her lips in a gentle kiss. Whispering against them, I tell her, “Let me prove to you that you’re the only one I want.”