Finding You (17 page)

So, I did.

A moan escaped my lips as Logan’s scent invaded my senses, spiced apple and cinnamon clouded my body and judgment. My lips parted as I tentatively ran my tongue across Logan’s perfectly defined bottom lip, tasting the saltiness of his tears. Collecting them, savoring them.

My hand trailed up to his muscular neck, entwining my fingers through the tips of his unbelievably soft hair as Logan deepened the kiss. He probed my tongue with his, expertly taking me, exploring me. This was no longer innocent. This was hot and frantic, and my body was responding shamelessly as I groaned from the sudden change of direction as our bodies became one.

“Oh shit.” Logan muttered against my mouth as he took hold of my exposed thighs, wrapping my legs around his waist. His fingers dug into my flesh as I moaned from the intense sensation of his hardness against my core. Only my lace panties and his dark denim jeans separated us. But holy shit, it felt so good.

I couldn’t think, I couldn’t breathe. All I could do was feel as Logan’s hips pinned me against the door while his tongue frantically searched my mouth, taking every last piece of me.

“Logan.” I moaned as he ground his hips against my core, sending electricity though out my whole damn body. It fueled my need and desire for more. So much more. Just a whisper of his name and he was growling against my mouth. We were so close as our bodies entwined at the most intimate points. Logan quickly found a slow, torturous rhythm as he ground his hips into my core. My eyes rolled as I threw my head back against the door, moaning as Logan’s teeth quickly found my neck. Grazing my skin, he slowly pushed me further to the edge.

My nails scraped against his scalp while his hips ground against me over and over, again. I was panting and breathless as he swiftly encircled my wrists with both hands, quickly pinning them above my head. His hair stroked my hypersensitive skin as his head rested in the crook of my neck once more. He was licking, biting, and sucking while he increased the pressure in his hips.

“Please.” I panted, I had no idea what I was pleading for. For him to stop? To carry on?

Oh God, carry on …

My mind was running at lightning speed when Logan’s took my earlobe between his teeth, my whole body started to buck underneath his. My body twisted in to a ball of desire that was desperate to release. Everything scorched and burned simultaneously as Logan ground his hips into mine one last time, before he whispered into my ear.

“I love you.”

The moan that erupted from my throat was hoarse and husky as my body found its release. He swallowed my scream with a sensually slow kiss, prolonging the earth-shattering pleasure that had completely consumed me.

“I’m sorry.” I said against Logan’s chest, my breathing came back down to a reasonable level for me to actually produce words. But I quickly regretted them as soon as they tumbled from my mouth when Logan quickly pulled back from me.

“What are you sorry for?” He asked gently, taking my face in his hands. He ran the pads of his thumbs over my skin, sending a rush of tingles through my now limp body.

“For me, I … Er.”

“Neva? Was that your first orgasm?” The look on Logan’s face didn’t give anything away. What would he think if he knew that he just took another piece of me?

“Neva, please answer me.” He pleaded. I couldn’t get the words out of my mouth. The only thing I could do was nod and close my eyes, not wanting to see his reaction.

“Damn.” He mumbled before taking my lips against his, kissing me like I had never been kissed before. It was so soft and sweet, making my heart flutter, my knees weak and my head dizzy.

“Stay with me.” He asked against my lips, my head was all over the place. Logan and I had shared a bed many times before, usually when he had to pull me out from one of my nightmares. But things are different now, we are different now.

“Logan, I can’t.” I pleaded. I needed him to stop. I needed this to stop. I was only so strong.

“Neva, if I can’t touch you, feel you or kiss you ever again after tonight, then I want you to stay with me. We will just sleep I promise.”

Things had already gone too far tonight, a line had been crossed and there was no going back for either of us. But the thought of falling asleep in Logan’s arms one last time was making my heart ache. I needed Logan to soothe that ache. Even if it was just for one night.

“Okay.”

I know I shouldn’t be doing this, but it was him. It has always been him. My Logan.

“Thank you.”

He pressed his lips against my neck softly before carrying me over to his bed, gently laying me down on his pillow and crawled up my body. He ran his hands down my ribs before reaching around to my back, lifting me slightly so my back curved and arched from the bed as he found the zipper of my dress. I searched his eyes frantically, trying to understand what he was doing.

“Relax.” He smiled as he slowly pulled down the zipper, releasing me of the confines of my tight clothes. My dress was now completely unzipped and just resting against my skin when Logan’s hands left my body as he sat back, sighing.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, nervous that he might having second thoughts.

“I don’t want anything between us tonight Neva, but I don’t know if I have enough restraint not to take you and make you mine.” His fingers trailed a line from my jaw to ribs.

Oh. God.

“I want to feel you.”

His hands reached my ribs and had started running lazy circles over my dress, a moan escaping my lips as his fingertips grazed my bare skin at the back of my dress.

“To know you.”

He suddenly moved from my ribs to my temple, placing his palm against my cheek. Leaning into his touch, I closed my eyes. His strong hands cradled my face.

“To own you.”

His hands wrapped around my face as he leaned his forehead against mine, sneaking the softest of kisses from my lips.

“But right now, I want to make love to you. Let me in Neva, let me love you.” I gasped, this man could undo me like no other, but was I ready to give him that piece of me? A piece of me that no one else could ever take?

“I don’t know if I can.”

Could I let him in, knowing that I would be more vulnerable than ever before?

“I don’t think my heart could take it if I can’t love you right now.” He pleaded, a he rained kisses all over my face from my eyes, to my cheeks to my nose.

“I don’t know how.” I confessed as he pressed a soft butterfly kiss on the corner of my mouth, drawing out a moan. I lay there desperately wondering if he understood the double meaning of my words.

“Then let me show you.”

I gasped. I didn’t want anything between us either and it was time I faced the facts. I loved this man deeply and if I couldn’t tell him with words, I was just going to have to show him. Sitting up, I quickly grasped at the hem of my dress as I slowly peeled it away from my body and over my head. I could hear a whispered gasp escape Logan’s lips as I threw my dress on the floor. I was exposed in only my black bra and matching lace panties, but I didn’t feel vulnerable. I felt empowered from the way Logan was watching me closely, taking in every single inch of my body.

Feeling confident, I took hold of Logan’s neck with both hands, pulling us both back down to the bed. His forehead rested against mine as he looked straight into my eyes. I watched as he tried desperately not to look down at my body once more.

With his hands on both sides of my head and his knees in between my thighs, he was holding his weight off of me. I wanted him close with no barriers. I wanted Logan’s bare chest against mine. To shield me, to hold me, to love me. Placing my still sore feet against the top of his knees I pushed hard against them, sending Logan’s body crashing against mine.

“Shit.” He groaned.

The sudden change in pressure as our bodies collided sent my mind spiraling into overdrive while my body splintered into a hole, filled with pleasure, desire and need.

“Neva.” He groaned as he rested his weight against my body. His hips flush to my aching core as his breath grazed my skin causing my whole body to shudder underneath his weight.

“I want you so fucking bad.” He growled huskily into my ear, fueling the raging fire that was already burning deep in my belly. Taking my earlobe between his teeth once more he sucked and licked gently, sending any rational thought straight out of the window.

“When I take you Neva, I am going to make damn sure you will never forget it.”

The husk in his voice was turning me into putty in his hands, ready to be molded.

I was suddenly aware of his hands around my waist as he quickly shifted our bodies, pulling me onto his lap. I wrapped my legs around his defined torso, my arms around his neck. We were nose to nose as he trailed his hand down to my bra. His deft fingers making short work of the clasp as he slowly peeled the straps from my shoulders, exposing me. His eyes never left mine as he threw my bra across the room, turning me on even more.

“I’m too scared to look Neva.” He whispered, closing his eyes. “Scared that I will wake up and this will all be just a dream.”

The insecurity in his voice fueled me further. This was just as scary for me as it was for him. This was new territory and we were both about to go into battle.

“It’s not a dream.” I reassured as I pulled his hand from my waist guiding it up to my exposed breast. He groaned as his fingertips swept across my aching nipple. Logan’s eyes flew wide open before quickly looking down to find his hand covering my breast. Suddenly he grabbed me at my waist and guided me down on my back, plunging his mouth around my nipple.

Taking my aching peak between his teeth he nibbled playfully as my hands found his hair, grasping at the roots and balling it into fists. I moaned from the new sensations taking over my body. My eyes rolled and my core ached as Logan lapped at my nipple, causing it to peak against his skillful tongue. He took his time worshiping my peak before showing the same attention to the other, nibbling, sucking and licking me into a damn frenzy. I couldn’t see straight. The fire in my belly was becoming an inferno, past the point of stopping.

“Logan, please.” I begged, moaning as he bit down hard on my nipple. I felt his hand trailing down to my now soaking panties.

“Shh, I’ve got you baby. I always have.” A sudden jolt of electricity surged through my veins as Logan’s fingers glided against my wet folds. “I always will.”

His expert fingers found their way to my swollen clit as he rained kisses across the swell of my breasts. Slowly making his way up my neck and biting playfully across my jaw he gently kissed the corner of my mouth.

“Always.” He captured my mouth with his as he slowly slid a finger inside me. Moaning, I quickly adjusted to the new sensations. Logan’s tongue slowly danced with mine while he gently drew his finger from inside me, only to push back in at a slightly different angle. My vision blurred from the sensory overload. It wasn’t fast and frantic anymore. This was love. This was Logan making love to me.

“No more barriers.” He said as he pulled his hand away from the inside of my panties. I couldn’t help but moan in protest. I started whimpering while I watched Logan took my panties with his teeth. As he slowly pulled them down my legs, he trailed his hands down the inside of my thighs following in the path of my panties.

Once my panties hit the floor, all I could do was watch as Logan hurriedly unsnapped his jeans, taking them off with lightning speed, leaving him kneeling there in all his glory. Holy hot damn! The man doesn’t wear boxers! His cock was standing proud and unashamed, making my mouth water with anticipation.

“Don’t look so scared, Neva. I will take care of you. Take care of us.” He said, clearly sensing my fear. Swiftly rolling on a condom, he crawled up my body once more. Placing his hands on either side of my head, he slowly lowered his body against mine, holding himself just mere inches away from me.

“I love you Neva James. Forever.” His breath tickled my lips as I felt the sudden intrusion of Logan inside me. A sudden pinch, a bite, then sweet and unfaltering pleasure as Logan stripped away the last of the barriers between us.

“I will always love you.” He pleaded, looking straight into my eyes.

“Oh god.”

“I will always protect you.”

We found our own sweet rhythm as he slid out of me before sliding back in at a faster pace. Stars danced in front of my eyes as the inferno of fire inside of me started to spread.

“I will always keep you safe.”

His words were penetrating my heart and my mind as the fire became wild and unforgiving, burning at scorching temperatures. The only thing I could do was let it burn.

“Logan.”

I couldn’t form words. Nothing I would say would come close to anything I felt for this man. This man who had taken every single piece of me, my fears, my demons, my heart and soul. And now my virginity.

“You will always have my heart.”

Tears stung my eyes as the familiar knot awakened deep inside me, my hands quickly wrapped around Logan’s neck as I pulled him close. I needed his lips on mine, I needed him to know.

Our lips collided as his hips moved in a sexy, slow tempo sending my mind, body and soul to the edge. Our tongues danced frantically as I put everything I felt into that one kiss, hoping he understood exactly how I felt. That I loved him, so much.