Authors: Mark Tufo
“Everyone got a seatbelt?” I asked as I buckled myself in.
“You can’t possibly go through them.” BT’s eyes were growing wide.
I smiled a sick grin at him. I felt like I had just eaten old, slimy, cheap, (you
know the extra fatty kind), uncooked bacon, and maybe it had a coating of green with
a few maggots thrown in just for effect. Yeah, it was
that
bad.
I heard belts buckling so quickly it almost sounded as if it had been choreographed.
“Dad?” Travis asked.
“It’ll be alright,” I lied.
I took out my first zombie as I hit him dead center with the grill of the truck. His
head struck the hood with such force that it sent a spray of broken teeth and blood
halfway up the windshield. I was glad for small favors when, instead of his whole
body coming up the truck, we were just momentarily jostled around as I ran over him.
“Gross,” Justin said. He had turned around to see the damage done. I’d seen enough
of it in my rear view mirror to be happy I was only viewing a six-inch-by-two-inch
rectangle. I couldn’t be sure, but it looked like I had run over its midsection, pushing
internal organs out through its mouth. Long ribbons of what looked like skinned animal
parts lay on the road next to its head. The slimy bacon was sounding worlds better
right now.
The nose of the truck dipped down as I drove off the road and into a culvert. My heart
skipped a beat or seventeen as I dug the front end into the upslope. The wheels spun
for a moment, I think it was zombies who actually saved us. A few slammed into the
rear end and lent just enough force to allow my rear wheels to catch and make the
truck start up the other side.
I rolled down my window. “Thanks for the push!” I yelled as I waved. It’s quite possible
I wasn’t completely under control of my own emotions. (Lack of blood flow to the brain
most likely being the cause—see earlier part about heart skipping beats).
“You
are
fucking nuts!” BT yelled, looking around I think for another seatbelt to strap over
himself.
“Please tell me you haven’t just figured that out?” Tracy asked. She had both hands
wrapped around the back of his seat as the truck was bucking wildly back and forth
and up and down.
We were off-road now, the high grass and weeds making it a particularly difficult
chore to see the surrounding terrain. I saw the small barbed wire fence and heard
the high-pitched twang as we snapped through the line. I exhaled hard as my chest
was forced into the steering wheel. We were in danger of high centering over a large
rock, the screech of metal was deafening. I could only hope I hadn’t just taken out
the oil pan.
A group of birds flew up as I was barreling down on them. “Pull!” I shouted enthusiastically.
This only made BT dig his fingers harder into the dashboard.
“Damn you, Talbot,” he muttered.
I was racing across the expansive open field, thankful to whoever had spent the time
to clear it of trees. My hands were swinging back and forth on the steering wheel
so rapidly from the uneven ground it really did appear like I was ‘playing’ at driving
much like a child might.
“They’re falling back,” Justin said, probably in the hopes that I would slow down.
The rising of the oil pressure was a contributing factor in determining that I needed
to go even faster to put as much distance between us and them as possible.
“I smell smoke,” Tracy said.
“That’d be the engine,” I told her, I could only hope it wasn’t actually caused by
the scummy pretend bacon sloshing around in my stomach.
“Not one fucking day, not one day could you make it with my truck!” Blared over the
car speakers.
“What the hell?” I asked, looking around.
“I hooked up a two-way radio to the car sound system,” Ron’s voice drifted out.
“Sorry about the truck,” I told him.
“Screw the truck, how much trouble are you in?” he asked, concerned.
“No video camera?” I asked, quickly sweeping a hand across the front of the stereo.
“Mike,” Ron said smoothly.
“Umm…enough,” I said vaguely, not trying to alarm the rest of the occupants.
“Where are you at? I’ll send help.”
“This is kind of like On-Star,” I told him.
“BT, where are you guys?” he asked, completely deciding to skip over me.
“Pretty close to the New Hampshire border, saw a sign saying something about toll
booths,” BT replied. I think he was happy to be doing anything else besides watching
me drive.
“You guys must be close to Kittery,” Ron said.
“Did he say something about kittens?” I almost shrieked.
“Kittery…he said Kittery.” BT did his best to calm me down. “But right now Ron we’re
off…umph…off the map. Will you slow down so I can talk?” he roared.
“Sure, sure, I’ll let them know what I’m doing,” I told him as I pointed behind us.
A legion of zombies blocked out the entire rear view.
“You’ve never listened to me before, don’t start now.”
“Oooh, fudge,” I whistled.
“What’s
oh fudge
?” Ron asked.
We had narrowly missed a metal hydrant sticking up from the ground. My guess was that
once it had been used for agricultural purposes, it had almost become our demise.
As if the ruts and valleys of this uneven land weren’t enough, now I had to wonder
how many of those ‘meat sticks’ were around. (Is further explanation necessary? See,
if we got stuck it would be like ‘meat on a stick’ for the zombies.) Not the best
analogy, but I was scared; we were on suspect turf with a failing vehicle, and no
place to hole up. Oh yeah, and I almost forgot to add the part about the zombies chasing
us. The
shitload
of zombies chasing us.
“Road!” Justin yelled so loudly I nearly lost control of the truck altogether.
I was going to thank Captain Obvious, but I was too relieved after our venture in
the unchartered.
“Look out, man!” BT shouted.
It was not enough warning, the passenger side of the truck rose precariously high
as I hit what looked like the rear axle of some large truck, lying in the road. The
impact had either shifted the tire off the rim or blown it out completely; didn’t
matter which really. We now had a disabled wheel to go with the rest of the problems.
Coolant was blowing all over the windshield, smearing the glass, making it that much
more difficult. I felt rather than saw when we touched down onto pavement. Smoke and
fluids were pouring from the hood; the truck was hobbling along like we had square
tires.
“I’m not hearing anything. Is everyone alright?” Ron asked.
We took our turns letting him and each other know we had made it through to the other
side nearly unscathed.
“How about the truck?” he asked.
“Umm…it’s salvageable,” I told him as the poor thing creaked and groaned its final
death throes.
“He means it is
salvage
,” Tracy clarified.
I glared at her.
“Son of a bitch. Find somewhere to stay I’ll start getting things rounded up. This
is on tape, so just let me know where you go and we’ll find you. Mike…” He paused.
“You might want to hurry,” I told him as I looked back. The speeders were doing what
speeders do, haul ass. “Okay, baby, you’re not quite dead yet, get us out of here,”
I begged the truck, caressing the dashboard.
“I heard that,” Ron said.
“You’re supposed to be hurrying,” I snapped as the front fender sparked along the
roadway. We were on the outskirts of Kittery, I guess, not that I really knew. The
houses were much too close to the roadway and didn’t look too particularly stalwartly
to withstand any sustained zombie attack. By the time I hit the main drag, the engine
was beginning to cough and sputter, the businesses here looked like they catered to
tourists and the large front-facing picture windows looked like a large invitation
to the zombies about to visit. This way they could see the food inside before they
sampled the wares.
“Take a right,” Tracy said as she slapped my arm. I don’t think it was intentionally
so hard, but one never knows what past transgression she was just now remembering.
“Shoe store?” I asked stupidly, rubbing my arm. “Oh,” I said appreciatively when I
saw the building up ahead. It was the town library, made from brick and mortar; from
this distance it looked somewhat like a castle. I could only hope its defenses were
as formidable. The building was huge, and two stories high. The windows…the blessed
first story windows were at least seven or eight feet off the ground. No zombies would
be coming through those. There was, however, the wide staircase that led to the front
double doors. That of course was a problem. But right now those doors were shut, and
I hoped they stayed that way.
“Ron, you still there?” I asked. I waited for a moment before I remembered he said
this was recording. “Okay we’re going to the library…(I looked around)…on Wentworth.
Big brick behemoth. Didn’t think this many people read in Maine. See you soon, big
brother.” The last part he may or may not heard as the engine began to throw a rod,
the loud metallic thumping making it difficult to think, much less talk. Time was
running short; I pushed my foot heavily down and was rewarded with a spurt of speed
followed immediately by the seizing of the engine. I was now coasting towards the
library; thankfully, it was downhill.
“Talbot, the library,” BT said.
“Yup.” I told him.
“It’s coming up.”
“Yup,” I replied.
“Fuck.” He said resignedly, once again bracing himself.
The truck jolted as I jumped the curb, we crossed over the cement walkway and were
now riding the brick pathway to the front. A handrail bisected the wide stairway,
a fair amount of the truck’s momentum was taken as I hit that rail, shearing it from
its moorings. I had at least one of the gods on my side that day as the front end
of the truck kissed the front doors and stopped with hardly a tap on the brakes on
my part.