Authors: Cassia Leo
Forever Ours (16 page)
“Yeah. I’m awake.”
“I should hope so. It’s past noon.”
I pull the phone away from my ear to look at the time: 12:34 p.m.
“What’s up?”
“We need you to come in tonight around seven to re-record some vocals on ‘Firefly’.” I can tell by the almost bored exasperation in his voice that Gene Hadley is getting tired of re-recording vocals because I was too parched and hungover on the initial recording. “Get some rest and drink plenty of water.”
He hangs up and I stare at the screen for a moment as the calls disappears. I swing my legs over the side of the bed and the first thing I see is a black bra on the floor. With great trepidation, I turn my head and peer over my shoulder. I wish I could say I’m surprised to find a thin brunette tangled in my bedsheets. Her left breast is exposed and her pouty lips are slightly parted as she sleeps.
I don’t remember what time I got in last night, but I do remember bits and pieces of the party in Tristan’s hotel room. Despite the problems with recording, I managed to convince Gene to allow Tristan and Jake to play bass and drums on the tour that kicks off at the end of this month. Tristan and Jake flew out a few days ago and we celebrated having the band back together last night.
It looks like I got a suite in the same hotel for me and …
What’s her name again? Laura? Lara? Lorena?
I can’t fucking remember.
I rise from the bed slowly and she begins to stir. I freeze for a moment, but she settles down quickly and continues to sleep. I tiptoe out of the bedroom and into the sitting area. Grabbing a bottle of water out of the minibar, I sit down at a glossy mahogany writing desk.
How can it be that it’s been five months since I last saw Claire and hers is still the first face I see in my mind when I get the urge to write a song? My memories of Claire are relentless. And no amount of alcohol or sex can erase her.
Picking up the hotel pen and pad of paper, I close my eyes and allow myself to remember. The first thing I see is Claire sitting in the shade of a giant oak tree in Moore Square, smiling as I sing to her. I press the pen to the paper and write the first lines:
We kissed under the trees, and talked about missing things. I wish I could have held you in; held in the heat of your breath; held onto you and I at our best.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Claire
Forever Ours
may 27, 2013
It’s hard not to think about Chris on his twenty-first birthday. But I’m going to try my hardest not to. I know wherever he is today, he’s probably having lots of fun. Drinking lots of booze. Screwing lots of girls. He’s living. So that’s what I’m going to do today. I’m going to live my life without thinking about Chris.
Senia is moving in next week and we’re going to have a great summer. My new apartment in Wrightsville Beach is kind of old and some of the doors and cabinets are swollen with humidity, but it smells like fresh paint. And it’s mine.
Dropping out of UNC just may turn out to be the smartest decision I’ve ever made.
Chris dropped out and look at him now.
Nope! Stop thinking about Chris.
I grab a bottle of water out of the tiny refrigerator that came with the apartment, then I head out the door. I walk through the small parking lot and toward my new workplace: Beachcombers Café. But I don’t go inside. I continue down Lumina to the surf shop next door.
A bell jingles as I enter the shop and I’m reminded of the movie
It’s A Wonderful Life
. “Every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings.” This reminds me of Christmases with my mom and I realize that I didn’t just come here to forget Chris. I came here to forget my mother.
Today, a new Claire emerges from the ashes of the fire that burned down every good thing in my life.
The walls of the shop are covered in surf apparel: wet suits, rash guards, board shorts, T-shirts. The floor displays are stacked with everything from surf wax and leashes to energy gum and tourist gifts. The surfboards are all standing up like soldiers behind the counter.
“Can I help you?” asks a young blonde girl with dreadlocks.
“I’m looking for Fallon.”
My voice is a bit shaky, but she doesn’t seem to notice or care. Her face lights up when she smiles. She slides off her stool and rounds the counter.
She holds out her hand for me to shake. “I’m Fallon.”
Her voice is kind of husky, but it’s comforting. I take her hand and shake it lightly. Her skin is a bit rough, but that makes me trust her. Fallon works until her fingers are calloused. Living with Jackie and Chris, seeing the long hours Jackie worked at the bakery and the endless hours of practice Chris would endure to get a song right, I’ve come to appreciate a strong work ethic as a very desirable quality.
Must stop thinking about Chris.
“Great!” I reply, letting go of Fallon’s hand. “I was just wondering … Well, someone told me that you give … Um, I was told that you’re a guru or something. I mean, I don’t know what to call it. I just … I want to learn to meditate.”
She continues to smile serenely as if I’m the millionth person who’s walked in here stammering like an idiot and she knows just how to fix it. “I can help you, but are you sure you’re ready?”
“What do you mean?”
She tilts her head as her gaze wanders over my face and to the empty space above my hair. “Do you think you’re ready to let go of all this?” She waves her hands around my ears as if she can see all my negative thoughts floating around my head. “All this stuff you’re carrying, it’s heavy.
Real
heavy.”
I can smell smoke on her breath and I’m wondering if maybe I made the wrong decision. She’s obviously smoking some good stuff. But maybe that’s what I need. Not to smoke some good stuff. But maybe I need someone who’s willing to do what I’m not willing to do. Maybe she can teach me how to do what I’ve been unable to do on my own. Maybe she can teach me to forget.
“I don’t know if I’m ready,” I reply. “But I know I’m desperate. That counts for something, right?”
She purses her lips, which are a bit too pink for her golden skin. “We’ll see. Meet me at the shore tomorrow at six a.m. I always start with a surf lesson to get to know you before we attempt meditation.”
I search my mind for my work schedule and realize I work at nine a.m. tomorrow. Linda won’t mind if I’m late to work. In fact, I’ll stop by the café right now and see if I can get someone else to cover my shift. This is too important.
I thank Fallon and leave the shop feeling lighter than I’ve felt in months. She’s right. I was carrying some heavy stuff around. But I already feel it being lifted away.
Now I know what people mean when they say
today is the first day of the rest of my life
. That’s exactly how I feel right now. Today, on Chris’s twenty-first birthday, my life without Chris finally begins.
Thank you for reading FOREVER OURS!
This story continues in
RELENTLESS, available here
.
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Forever Ours Playlist
“Cover Your Tracks” by A Boy and His Kite
“Like Home” by Nicky Romero and Nervo
“Are We There Yet?” by Ingrid Michaelson
“Little Wing” by The Jimi Hendrix Experience
“Nicest Thing” by Kate Nash
“Firefly” by Ed Sheeran
“Fools” by Lauren Aquilina
“Alive” by Krewella
“Home” by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes
“Take Your Time” (Acoustic) by Fun.
“My Kind of Love” by Emeli Sandé
“Lilo” by Lauren Aquilina
“Your Song” by Ellie Goulding
“The Only Exception” by Paramore
“Waiting Game” by Banks
“Say Goodbye (I Won’t Even)” by Adaline
“Autumn Leaves” by Ed Sheeran
“Say Something” by A Great Big World
“Let Her Go (feat. Hannah Trigwell)” by Boyce Avenue and Hannah Trigwell
“Till I Fall Asleep” by Jayme Dee
“Sweetheart, What Have You Done to Us” by Keaton Henson
“I Almost Do” by Taylor Swift
“She’s Long Gone” by The Black Keys
“1000 Sundowns” by Emma Louise
“All I Want” by Kodaline
Listen to the playlist on YouTube.
Listen to the playlist on Spotify.
“Forever Ours”
Sun in your hair, ignites my insides,
Glow of your skin, lights me up right,
Touch of your hand, I’m on my knees here,
Begging please, baby just stay near,
Yeah, right here.
‘Cause we don’t have to go nowhere,
This place is ours, it’s everywhere,
Yeah, we can stay,
Stay forever.
Ours.
It’ll stay forever ours.
I don’t mind, if we stumble and fall,
Just the way we get through it all,
No, I don’t care, if you break us down,
‘Cause I’ll get up, dust you off again,
All over again.
‘Cause we don’t have to sleep in darkness,
Blast the lights, it’s ours, there’s no one else,
It’s only me and you,
This is forever.
Ours.
It’ll stay forever ours.
“Sleepyhead”
Feels so wrong to want this
You look so broken there
A flicker in the mist
As tired as the air
Your head upon the pillow
It’s time to bury bones
Outside a whispering willow
The limbs fall like stones
So frightened of the dark
You’re my sleepyhead
Hiding with the stars
Put your dreams to bed
My sleepyhead.
You’re my sleepyhead.
With eyes full of shadow
And a mouth full of glass
Gasps come so hollow
Your lips taste like ash
Don’t waste your hours
Your time don’t come cheap
Don’t fall apart, baby
Just fall asleep
And I don’t know why I can’t kill this doubt
But I promise I’ll put your pain to rest
If it means I never sleep again.
Other books by Cassia Leo
CONTEMPORARY ROMANCE
Forever Ours
(Shattered Hearts #0.5)
Relentless
(
Shattered Hearts #1)
Pieces of You
(Shattered Hearts #2)
Bring Me Home
(Shattered Hearts #3)
Abandon
(Shattered Hearts #3.5)
Black Box
(stand-alone novel)
PARANORMAL ROMANCE
Parallel Spirits
(
Carrier Spirits #1)
EROTIC ROMANCE
About the Author
New York Times
and
USA Today
bestselling author Cassia Leo loves her coffee, chocolate, and margaritas with salt. When she’s not writing, she spends way too much time watching old reruns of
Friends
and
Sex and the City
. When she’s not watching reruns, she’s usually enjoying the California sunshine or reading – sometimes both.
FOREVER OURS
by Cassia Leo
Copyright © 2014 by Cassia Leo
All rights reserved.
Cover art by Sarah Hansen of
Okay Creations
.
Formatting by
Streetlight Graphics
.
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each reader. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to the retailer and purchase your own copy.
All characters and events appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real events or persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
ISBN-13:
9781310839399
