Forever (This #5) (14 page)

Ryan bellows. “So. Let me get this straight. You’re either saying my little brother lets you control him? Or…”

“Shut up, Ryan,” Bradley says. I had totally forgotten they were even in the car. The tension is so tight in this vehicle it could slash the very tires we’re riding on if it sprung free. “Don’t be an asshole.” The car slows to a stop. “We’re here. Let’s go.”

The chauffeur opens the door for us to exit. We wait at the back while he opens the trunk and retrieves our coats, gloves, and scarves. People up north would probably laugh. It’s probably only in the forties, but it might as well be below freezing down here in the south. The line is long, but not too bad. It looks worse than it is. I remember from last year how quickly it dissipates. “I hope we get the trolley this year instead of the bus,” I say.

“Not me. I hope we get the bus,” Bradley chimes in.

“Why is that, brother-in-law?”

“Because it makes me feel like a horny boy in high school when we’re on that back row with the lights out.”

We all laugh.

Gabby blushes. “I’m sorry. He’s in a rare mood tonight.”

He pulls her in front of him, wrapping his arms around her waist and nuzzles her neck. “This place does things to me.”

Ryan threads his fingers in mine. “Why do you want the trolley, Sam?”

I shrug. “I don’t know. Reminds me of home.”

Joe exhales, his breath turning to condensation. “Does it also remind you of ghost tours and such?” His eyes roam to Gabby’s and back to mine.

“I know what I
meant.
It reminds me of home.”

“Me too, Sam,” Gabby says. My mind wanders back to that last weekend there. I don’t need vehicles to remind me of that. Those memories are too fresh, too front and center.

“So, you both hope we get the trolley because you’re sentimental? Why am I not surprised?” Ryan asks.

Joe’s eyes are fixed on mine. I shift my weight and turn to Ryan. “I don’t care which one we get. It’s freezing. I just want to get there already so we can get hot chocolate.” My body starts to shiver.

He offers me my bulky wool coat he’s been holding since we arrived. “Here. Bundle up.”

Joe does the same for Rebecca. Of course, hers is a fitted leather one that only boosts her cleavage. No telling how much that outfit cost.

A bus pulls into the parking lot, and the line moves quickly. We almost make it to the front, but we have to wait on the next one. “Dang it.” Bradley snaps his finger. “Are there two busses, Ryan?” His nose scrunches. “I can’t remember.”

Just then, a trolley pulls in. Gabby and I laugh while high fiving each other.

Bradley and Ryan look at each other and shrug. “Maybe on the way back,” Bradley says.

There are a few families in front of us with kids and strollers. They climb aboard the trolley and take seats toward the front, and just like teenagers, Bradley holds Gabby’s hand as he leads her to the very back row. Ryan and I follow and sit in the seat across the aisle. Joe is waiting for Rebecca to scoot toward the window seat of the opposite row in front of us. He sits on the bench closest to the aisle, closest to me.

Ryan intertwines his fingers with mine as the rest of the passengers board. Finally, the doors close and we’re on our way. The lights dim, but out of the corner of my eye, I see Rebecca lean in and kiss Joe. Ryan takes my chin between his fingers, turns my head to face him, and plants a soft kiss on my lips. “Let all your worries go for tonight. Let’s have fun.” He caresses my face.

“Okay.” I offer a small smile. Does he know my worries only revolve around his brother and the impending Christmas Day festivities with my father? But if I’m honest, Joe is consuming me.

Not even five minutes later, and we’re stopped at the side entrance to Hopelands Gardens. We watch as people disembark, and when all the strollers and families have exited, we make our way to the front, then down the steps. There’s a line of people waiting to board, and Ryan wraps me in his arms as Bradley and Gabby step down the stairs, hand in hand.

“Let’s get hot chocolate.” Bradley points to a cream-colored building with green stable doors and shutters.

Gabby giggles. “Yes! And I need a bathroom.”

“That makes two of us.” Rebecca follows.

I stare down at her heels and smirk, trying to contain my laughter. The ground is soft, loose dirt and gravel in this section. Large magnolia trees and live oaks provide a twiggy canopy. Their trunks are dressed in white lights. Two life-sized painted thoroughbreds are in front of the building, which if I remember correctly is a museum.

“I could use a restroom myself.” Bradley releases Gabby’s hand and goes in the opposite direction.

Ryan taps my nose. “Do you need to go?”

I shake my head. “Not right this minute.”

Joe smirks. “I’m surprised. It’s some kind of unspoken girl rule to go to the bathroom together.”

“That’s stereotypical.” And it assumes I like the company of the girls in the bathroom. Gabby, yeah. But Rebecca. The jury’s still out, but the pendulum is swinging toward no.

He shrugs. “Whatever. You drank enough to where I’d think you’d need to go.”

I stare at the twinkling, navy sky. “Two things. One, can we please quit discussing how much I drank on the way or when I should stop? And two, can we please stop discussing the bathroom. It’s just not…”

Both brothers are looking at me amused. “It’s just not sexy. If you need to take a leak, then go. No need to announce it or ask me if I need to go.”

Ryan raises his arms, his palms facing me. “You’re cranky and feisty tonight.”

“Sorry. Lack of sleep.”

“No, it’s cute. But in all seriousness, you’re going to get halfway through the park, then decide you need to pee. And you’re going to be shit out of luck.”

“I’ll take my chances. Besides, there are other bathrooms. Just go already so we don’t spend all night hanging out here.”

Ryan chuckles. “Didn’t she call you bossy on the way?” He points to Joe, who nods.

I give Ryan a playful slap on the arm and glare at Joe before walking to the line for the hot chocolate.

He follows me, shoving his hands in his pockets. “So.”

“So.” I look straight ahead because I feel my cheeks reddening with each step he takes closer to me.

“I didn’t know Bradley was going to invite us to Christmas.”

“That makes two of us.”

“I’m sorry they keep inviting Gabe to stuff. I know how you feel about him.”

A shiver pierces through my body like I’ve been stabbed by an iceberg. “Me too.”

“Are you going?”

I peer into his molten brown eyes. “I don’t feel like I have an option. If I don’t go, I miss out on Christmas with my only family. If I go, I’m going to be uncomfortable the entire time.”

The line moves, the wind blows, and the condensation leaves my body in heaves and gives away the increased speed of my breaths. The girl at the counter, who appears to be in her teenage years dressed in an adorable green and red chevron infinity scarf, matching hat, and gloves smiles. “You two make an adorable couple.”

“I—”

“We’re—”

“Hot chocolate or cider? And help yourself to fresh baked cookies.”

I gulp as I grab for a cookie, shoving a large bite into my mouth before realizing I can’t answer her question now.

“We’ll have two hot chocolates, please.”

I smile and take another bite of cookie.

“Here you go,” she says, offering a cup to me and then to Joe. “Y’all enjoy.”

Shoving the last bit of cookie in my mouth, I put the napkin under the cup, and clear my throat in between blows over its rim. “Are things serious with Rebecca?”

“What does it matter to you?” He looks past me.

“I was just surprised. You don’t really date. You’re supposed to be more of a playboy than Bradley.”

He chuckles. “Bradley is clearly a terrible playboy, right?”

“Are you?”

“You see what I want you to see. Sound familiar?”

“You want me to see you’re not a playboy? You want me to see you have a girlfriend? You want me to see you play mind games?”

He smirks. “Maybe all of the above.” He arches an eyebrow. “Maybe not the last one, or maybe none at all.” He sniffs, and my eyes are drawn to the point of his red nose. It’s perfect. Just like his eyes, his rosy cheeks, the stubble…his lips. “Would any of those make a difference?”

“Sure is taking them forever to go to the bathroom.”

“So good at evading questions that require emotional output. Don’t draw the walls of your little dungeon back up. Don’t punt the ball yet. Do you still think your psychological profile—er, assessment of the brothers is correct? That Ryan is the one who wants to settle, and I’m the one who’s”—he does air quotes with his free hand—“dangerous? What was the other word you used?”

My eyes narrow. Every part of my being wants to tell him it was completely accurate, and that everything is going just how I envisioned it.

“Or are you struggling with the pangs of jealousy I swear I saw course through your body the moment you saw Rebecca at my side? Has the grass suddenly become a tad bit greener for you?”

My lips part, but words refuse to form.

He rolls his eyes. “I really am sorry about Gabe. Enjoy your evening with my brother.”

Rebecca and Gabby exit the old building laughing, and Joe tilts his head. My eyes search his in an effort to understand what just happened. As if I wasn’t confused before, it’s like my head has been tossed around in a washing machine, put on a needle, and someone tipped it into a never-ending spin.

I drag in a deep breath, feeling the cold all the way to the base of my lungs. With each step Joe takes away from me, the walls of my fortress crack.

Let It Snow
plays on the speakers as Ryan joins me at my side, a smirk on his face, and rubbing his hands together. “So where do you wanna go first?”

I point to the table of complimentary refreshments. “You don’t want anything?”

“Nah, maybe when we get back.”

“Have you heard Darius Rucker’s version of this song?” I ask, as I mouth the lyrics.

He takes my hand and tucks it in the crook of his arm. “You know there’s not been much time for listening to anything other than pulses, breath, and bowel sounds.” He leads us out of the congested area and onto one of the lighted paths, and I toss the remainder of my hot chocolate into the trash. “Left or straight?”