Forgotten Truths (The Forgotten Truths Series) (13 page)

“Yes, Captain Brown told me. But she doesn’t know. You’re risking enough just talking about it right here.”

“She’s asleep. She can’t hear us.”

“Or she could be awake and listening to everything we say.”

I wasn’t sure if he really believe this or not, but then he went on.

“I’m just saying that she doesn’t know and it would be wise, if she ever did see you, that you don’t bring it up.”

It was quiet for a moment. I wondered if they were silently communicating or mouthing words to each other until I heard the man sigh.

“She’s beautiful.”

James stopped his thumb and then started again. “She is.”

“I never would have expected
her
to look like this.”

“Would you be quiet? Stop saying that kind of stuff out loud.”

“Fine. I’m going to bed. We had a little trouble at the fort last night anyway so I’m exhausted.”

“What happened?”

“Someone tried to break into the jail for some reason. We don’t have anyone down there, but someone broke in, apparently thinking there was.”

“That’s odd. Did you catch him?”

“No. He got away before we realized it. We didn’t think to cover the cells since no one is there. We just heard noises, and by the time we got there it was empty.”

“Hmmm. That’s really strange. Let me know if anything else happens.”

“I will. I’m going to bed now. Goodnight.” I heard him leave the room, and the door closed behind him.

James shifted a little, and I assumed he was getting uncomfortable. But then I felt his breath on my ear as he whispered, “You can stop pretending now.”

I yawned and stretched. “How’d you know I was awake?”

“You became very still, so I knew you were listening.”

I still didn’t move. I was too comfortable with his arm around me. He stopped moving his thumb and placed his hand on the bed beside him to push himself into more of a sitting position since he had slid down during the night. I reluctantly sat up and stretched again. It was nice to be able to sleep without having a nightmare, and James had made it very clear that he didn’t mind me holding him in order to make that happen. But it still bothered me that I couldn’t figure out why I could trust him not to hurt me, and yet I couldn’t trust anyone else, especially the people I’d known for years.

~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~

James spent all morning and a good portion of the afternoon talking about Will. It had started with me asking him if Will was the captain’s son, and he hadn’t shut up since. We started to walk along the beach toward the town. We weren’t in any hurry to go anywhere, but we figured we’d check on the progress of the dresses to please Captain Brown. I was in the surf while James stayed in the dry sand. The water was cold, but felt very good on my skin as it splashed on my ankles and feet. I stopped listening to him after awhile and focused instead on the sound of the water and the feel of it. Suddenly, he was directly in front of me which forced me to stop.

“You haven’t heard a word
I’ve said, have you?” he asked in an irritated tone, but his eyes gave him away.

“No. After a couple hours of hearing stories about Will and you when you were kids, I stopped,” I admitted, not trying to hide the smile tugging at the corner of my lips. “Plus, there’s something about walking through water that makes me not able to focus on other things.”

“Is that right?” he asked. He took a little step closer.

I looked out at the water again. I was getting the same
feeling I had in the barn when there was a shift between us. It wasn’t unlike the one I had gotten around Mark when he told me he wanted to marry me, but it was still different. I had this weird connection with James that was unlike anything I’d ever had with anyone else. He treated me like no one else either. I knew if I kept telling myself this, I would believe it. But I just wasn’t used to it. It wasn’t as if it didn’t feel right, in fact it was nice, very nice. It was just new and different, and I wasn’t good with new and different.

He stepped back. He must have sensed that
my silence was more out of me being uncomfortable than unsure of myself. He came back beside me and remained silent as we started walking again. After we had walked at least a mile, he reached over and took my hand. He rubbed his thumb over the skin. It felt so nice that I let him hold it, but still didn’t say anything. We headed toward the road since we were close to the town and went to the tailor. When we arrived, he told us to come back in a few days and he’d have them done. So we left the store and walked around town a little.

He started telling me another story about when Will and he spooked some horses attached to a carriage when I looked up and saw someone staring at me from down an alley. The person came out of the shadows, and it was Mark. Someone walked between us as I tried to keep my eyes on him, but he was gone.

“What’s the matter?” James stopped and followed my gaze. When he saw nothing, he turned back to me, “You’re turning white.”

I knew I had seen him. The question was why had he disappeared? I didn’t think James holding my hand would have stopped him from running over to me. It would have made him angry, but that wouldn’t have stopped him.

“It… it was Mark.” I turned to James. “I saw him down that alley.”

“Mark?” He looked back down the alley. “I didn’t see anyone.”

“You weren’t looking.” I glanced down the alley again. “But he was there! I know I saw him.”

We stared for a few more minutes, but nobody appeared. James sighed and turned back to me. “I don’t see anybody, Love.”

“But he was there.”

“Well, we better get back home soon because it’s starting to get dark and we’re walking.” He started to pull me. “Let’s walk along the beach again.”

I reluctantly followed, very confused about what had just happened. I knew that I had seen Mark, there was no doubt about that. But for whatever reason, he left. James stayed quiet as we walked along the beach. I didn’t walk in the water this time, my mind lost in thought. James started to swing our arms, and when I looked at him, he was smiling.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” I tried to smile back, but I couldn’t do it. I shifted my eyes back to the sand.

“Look, if you really want, we can go back tomorrow and ask around.”

I turned toward him. “What happened to me staying with you?”

He swallowed,
and for the first time, he showed that he was nervous. “I want you to stay with us. You should stay with us.”

“What’s the matter? Would you stop me if I tried to leave?” I s
lowed my pace until I was standing still.

“Of course I would,
” he said as he stopped beside me.

“How would you try to stop me?”

He ran his hand through his hair. “I think…”

“What?”

He turned toward me. “I don’t know how to say it.”

“Just try will you? What harm could it do? I just want to know how you’d try to stop me.”

He looked me in the eye. “If Mark is back to take you, and you were determined to leave, then I would ask you to marry me.”

I took a step back. “You’d what?”

“Look, it was only if he was back. I mean, I do have strong feelings for you, and I would honestly mean it. I do honestly mean it. And you’re starting to trust me. You said you don’t let people near you, and I’m the only exception. And, I mean, that wouldn’t mean you’d stay or say yes, but I’d do everything I could to try to keep you here.”

I looked at him closely. He meant every word of it. And the strange thing was I wasn’t shocked by it. I knew he was protective of me, and we hadn’t known each other long. His points were valid as well. James asking me to marry him didn’t bother me the way it did when Mark asked me. Mark seemed to always have a hidden agenda, whereas James kept everything out in front of me. He had no secrets from me. I did intend to go back to my father when he found me. But what would my life be like without James?

My silence made him very uneasy. “Well, it’s not like it would stop you. You’re going to do whatever you-“

“Yes,” I said quickly which made
him stop in midsentence.

“Yes?” He looked
bewildered and confused as if he couldn’t believe what I had just said.

I was shocked myself. I had just been thinking that I was going to go back to my father but I said I’d marry James? Wasn’t that a contradiction? How did I intend to marry James but go back to living with my father? I heard myself continue and say, “If it came down to it, then yes, I’ll marry you.”

“What about your father?” He looked at me closely. “I don’t understand. How are you giving up so easily?”

“I don’t see it as giving up. I mean, I want to see my father again, I will see my father again. I just…” My mouth was still going even though my mind
hadn’t caught up. I looked down as everything hit me at once. Suddenly it all started to make sense. “I barely know you, but there’s something I can’t explain that draws me to you, something I haven’t felt before.”

“I um…” He was quiet, so I glanc
ed up at him. He wasn’t looking at me, and he was running his hand through his hair again. “I honestly didn’t think you’d agree. I thought you’d scream and be angry at me.”

I looked down. “I don’t know. If you don’t want to…”

“No, I do, I really want to.”

“But not right now.” I
paused. “You weren’t meaning right now.”

“Only if it came down to keeping you here. If we got married before your father came to take you. That’s what I meant.”

Now I understood why he thought I would get angry, and I could feel it start inside me. I glared at him. “You want me to marry you to keep me away from my father?”

“No, no. That’s not at all what I meant
at all.” He turned back to me quickly. “I would never keep you from your father. But if we got married, then you’d have to live with me and not your father. I don’t know how else to put it. I would never keep you from seeing him. Never. But I just don’t want you leaving here and never coming back. I… I love you.”

This conversation was getting deeper with every passing minute. “You love me?”

“Yes. I really do.” He stepped closer to me. It made me nervous, especially after his confession. I couldn’t look at him. His voice was soft when he spoke again. “Just like you said, I feel myself drawn to you. I can’t imagine what it would be like without you in my life.”

I closed my eyes. I felt so confused, but at the same time, after what he just said, I felt something else. This felt more like what I needed to feel when a man asked me to marry him. Everything with Mark was wrong. And the fact that he was going to make me marry him, whether I wanted to or not, should have warned me right then and there. But with James, he wasn’t going to force me. H
e had expected I’d say no. That told me a lot.

“Look, I didn’t mean to do any of this the way I did. I really didn’t. It just sort of… came out.”

I opened my eyes. I was suddenly very tired and I realized that it was dark. Only the moon and the stars were lighting the beach. I looked up at him and took his hand. He glanced down at it and then stared at my face. He squeezed my hand and said, “Let’s just go home. We can discuss this later.”

He walked me back to the house in silence. After holding the door open for me, he led me up the stairs. When we
arrived at my room, he stopped. Not looking at me, he said, “Do you want to try sleeping on your own? Or do you want me to stay with you?”

“Stay with me,” I said immediately. I knew if
I was alone, the nightmares would start again.

“Then would you mind if we went in my room tonight? I don’t know how you can sleep in there with how bright it gets when the sun rises.” He
finally turned toward me.

“I don’t care.”

He took the few steps across the hall and opened his door. He grabbed one of the lit candles from the hallway and reached inside his room to light one on a table. He set the candle back where it belonged, then held the door open for me.

His room was a mirror image of mine. The fabrics were a deep red, almost a black color
with gold accents, and the furniture was a dark brown wood. The room itself had a dark red paint on the walls to match the fabrics. Compared to my room, this looked like a dungeon. Mine was so light and airy, and this was so dark. But it was very elegant at the same time. It was beautiful, I yawned, unable to help myself.

He smirked.
“Feel free to look around. I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Where are you going?” I turned around to face him.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I missed dinner, so I’m pretty hungry.”

I nodded,
but looked back at the bed. “I’m just tired.”

“Okay
then. I’ll eat something quickly and come back up.

He left and quietly shut
the door behind him. I walked around the bed so that I was closer to the window and looked out. The moon reflected off some of the trees which made them shine as the wind caught them. I went back to the bed and pulled back the large comforter I adjusted the pillows before crawling in. The bed wasn’t as soft as mine, but I was too tired to care.