From Burning Ashes (Collector Series #4) (7 page)

Suddenly I felt exhausted. We needed to talk
about so many things, but my adrenaline from the escape hit bottom.
Wordlessly I turned and headed for Lexie.

“I’m sorry, I don’t remember adjourning the
meeting.”

“Good night, Croygen.” I waved over my
shoulder. “We can talk later. Plan for our next move.” I settled
down on the blanket next to my sister. Out in the world, people
were rising for the day as I tucked in for a nap. My body and mind
needed a little time to rest. “Wake me up when it’s my time for
watch.”

The boys didn’t respond. I heard Sprig’s
nails skating over the cement as he ran to me. He curled into my
neck as I lay down. There were so many things wrong, so many
problems ahead of us, but as I huddled closer into my sister, I had
to hold on to the small victories. We were alive and we had
escaped. All the rest could wait for later: the fact the man I
loved was part demon, who still wanted to kill me; that we were
being hunted by groups of people and had no magic; Lexie’s frailty
limited the distance we could put between us and DMG; I still
carried the Stone of Destiny in my boot; and we stood nowhere
closer to taking Rapava down.

In this moment, I got to hold the little girl
I thought I had lost forever.

That was enough for now.

It was dark outside when I finally stirred.
Lexie fidgeted and groaned in her sleep, so my own rest hadn’t been
relaxing. With a sigh, I nudged Sprig away from my head and rolled
over, my bladder demanding I get up.

Ryker still positioned himself on the sill,
staring out. Hearing me move, he darted his gaze to me then back
out the hole in the window.

“Do you need me to take over?” I walked over
to him, rubbing my arms. Losing the heat from Lexie’s and Sprig’s
bodies raised goosebumps up my arms. The scrubs we were all wore
did nothing to keep away the chill.

“No,” he replied.

“Ryker, you need to sleep too.”

“Later.”

He wouldn’t look at me. The piece of my heart
I clung to while I carved into him sank to the bottom of my soul. I
hadn’t expected anything different, but I hadn’t let myself think
about the pain of truly losing him. Maybe not in death, but I lost
him just the same.

“Go back to bed, Zoey. You need to stay warm.
Your body needs to rest after what it went through.” He pressed his
shoulders into the wall.

“No more than yours.” I folded my arms over
me, trying to keep in the warmth.

He twisted irritably on the ledge, feeling my
eyes on him. Without his axe strapped to his back, he was like Thor
without his hammer. Something felt wrong. Off. He didn’t have to
speak a word for me to sense his loss.

“What happened to you?” I asked.

“Nothing you need to know about.”

“
Ryker
.” I clenched my palms together.
“Tell me something. Please.”

He finally looked over at me. “It’s not going
to make you feel better.”

“I’m not looking to feel better.” I took a
step closer to him but stopped when his nose flared. “I want to
know about your real mother and how you found out Vadik’s your
father. What happened while we were apart?”

Anger blazed from Ryker’s white irises. “How
do you know about Vadik?”

“You told me. Well, sort of. You told me you
were part demon when…”

“When I tried to kill you,” he finished my
sentence. “I don’t recall what I said during that time.” He stared
out into the dark. “It’s more a feeling. The need…” He trailed off.
“So yeah, I’m part demon.” A strange noise came from his throat.
“The son of Valefor.”

“Valefor?”

“That’s his real name. Duke of Thieves. I
knew I was good at stealing, but it is actually in my DNA. Power,
speed, dexterity, and the desire to thieve. I wasn’t just good at
it, I was born to do it.”

“Wow.” I wrapped my arms around my
middle.

“I saw her, my mother. A painting of her hung
in the living room when Amara and I were trying to escape.”

“Amara? How is she involved with this?” Anger
drilled up the base of my neck. That bitch helped him escape? But
she turned us in. It didn’t make sense.

Ryker didn’t seem to hear me, his mind lost
in the past.

“She was so beautiful,” he murmured. “Seeing
her face, her smile, brought back a memory. It was my third
birthday. I remembered my father pouring my dinner all over my cake
and shoving my face into it and forcing me to eat it till I threw
up, then eat that as well.”

My hand went to my mouth.

“Guess that’s why I don’t like mixing my
food.” He rubbed his head. “In the memory his face looked so clear
along with his rage and need for control. He hit her.”

He rolled his jaw, his gaze far off. He
stayed quiet for more than a minute, but I stood there, not budging
in my own stubbornness.

“After he did that, my mom snuck me into the
forest where a woman waited for us. A Druid, I think. She put a
spell on me to invoke my powers early and hide me from my father.”
He cleared his throat, shifting. “But the price was my mother’s
blood. Her life. She killed herself for me. To keep me safe.”

I let my eyes close briefly.

“I jumped and lost my memory of her…what she
did for me. Who my father was.”

“I am so sorry, Ryker.”

“Ryker.” He snorted derisively. “Funny, I
don’t even know my real name.”

“Ryker is your real name. The family who
raised you gave you love and your name. Your mother sacrificed
herself so you could grow up loved and protected. Don’t take that
away from her.” I wanted to go to him so badly it ached, but any
movement I took, he shot me a “stay back” glance.

“What’s even more amusing about finding out
I’m part demon was learning my mother’s part human. The two things
I grew to despise, and I’m both.”

“You’re Ryker, the Wanderer.” I put my hands
on my hips. “All the other stuff doesn’t matter.”

“It doesn’t matter I’m a demon?” Fury burst
out of his mouth.

“Not to me.”

He ran his hand over the top of his blond
Mohawk with a grunt. “You need to stay away from me.”

“Not a chance,” I croaked out, toeing my boot
into the ground.

His eyes dropped to my shoe, his expression
growing intense. I looked down, knowing his eyes had followed.

“Why did you give it to me?” I asked.

“Because I knew it would be safe with
you.”

Silence grew heavy between us. “Ryker?”

“Zoey, you need to go. Now.” He rubbed his
hands as if he were trying to keep them from curling into
fists.

I wasn’t ready to walk away yet. “I am sorry
about your axe. And I’m sorry about your…our…powers. That they
didn’t all go back to you.”

His gaze darted to me. “Why are you sorry?”
His forehead crinkled. He rounded his head back to the window, his
voice growing so soft I could barely hear him. “I don’t blame
you…or them. I’d choose to stay with you too.”

Tears prickled the back of my lids.
“Ryker…”

“It changes nothing.” He sighed. “Because of
them, you lived…that is enough for me.”

“And because I died for a moment, some went
back to you. Saving your life.
That
is enough for me.”

He rubbed his forehead, his lids
blinking.

“Do you think the need to kill me will ever
go away?” I asked softly.

“I don’t know. Until I feel completely in
control of myself, I need you far from me.” His teeth gritted
together.

“But you might be able to handle them?
Eventually?”

He stayed silent, misery lining his forehead.
Without saying it, I felt him pushing me away. Saying goodbye.

I felt and heard my heart break. It was like
cracking open a clam, ripping the tendons apart in a painful
wrench.

“Go back to bed, Zoey,” he finally uttered.
“Quickly.”

Fury nibbled at my toes until I let it ride
up my spine, hunching my shoulders. “Can I pee first, boss?” Anger
was my default. If I couldn’t use my fists, I attacked with
attitude.

“Stay close,” he ordered.

I stood for another beat. When he didn’t turn
to look at me, I whirled and stomped from the room.

Bastard. Wanderer.

“Screw him,” I mumbled.
You’d like to!
my mind sang back. “Shut up,” I yelled at myself.

I went outside, finding a dark corner. After
I relieved myself, I stood, feeling the hair on my arms rise. All
my senses tingled. I wasn’t alone. I scanned the dark space,
landing on outlines of dumpsters and other objects playing games on
my eyes in the shadows.

A scuffling noise came from the roof,
startling me, capturing a gasp in my throat. It was probably a rat
or a cat, but my gaze still stayed latched on the area, trying to
make out anything. At a squeak of wheels from a dumpster, I jumped
in the air and rotated around. Sweat trickled down the back of my
shoulders. I wouldn’t be stupid and ask who was there. All the
things hunting us would not be polite and respond. They would
attack.

I glanced at the heavy doors down the
corridor, contemplating my next move. Would Ryker hear me if I
screamed? Before I could decide, a shrill squeal of nails scraped
down metal, icing my bones. I took off running. As I neared the
doors, a figure stepped out. The dark only gave me an outline, but
a fist collided with my face and knocked me on my ass. Pain
exploded along my cheekbone and nose.

“Arguing with yourself, Zoey? Not a good
sign. Maybe you should have stayed locked up.”

Oh. Hell. No.

“Amara,” I snarled, sitting up and rubbing my
nose.

Amara stepped out from the shadows, the
moonlight highlighting her elegant features. A huge smile spread
over her beautiful face. “I wish I could say I enjoyed seeing you
again, Zoey, but we both know I’d be lying.”

I scrambled to my feet. I could only see the
girl who betrayed us, who turned Ryker over to Vadik and me to DMG.
The torture, the pain, the heartache… A deep growl came from my
throat, my body lowering itself to attack.

“Still a little mad at me, I see.” She
smirked

Hatred clogged my throat; I couldn’t even
respond. I leaped for her, my fingers itching to tear her apart. My
body crashed into hers, taking us both down on the cement. My arms
were already swinging, and my hand slapped her face. I couldn’t
feel, see, or hear anything. Fury buzzed in my brain, and the need
to taste her blood drove me forward with abandon. I only got in two
more hits before I flew in the air, being pulled away from her.

“No,” I snarled, reaching out for her. The
need to inflict pain blurred my thoughts. I struggled to get back
to her, but the arm around my stomach held me tightly.

“Zoey,” Ryker barked in my ear, but I ignored
him as my eyes latched on to the woman on the ground. She patted at
the blood coursing down her chin.

“Let me go!”

“Whoa, girl.” Croygen came into sight and
reached out to calm me. My jaw snapped at his fingers, urging him
back. “Holy shit!”

“Croygen, step back,” Ryker ordered.

“What the hell is wrong with her?” Croygen
stared at me.

“You’ve never seen her in crazed fighter
mode, have you?”

“I’ve seen her fight.”

“No, you actually haven’t.” Ryker drew me
closer to his chest. His heartbeat thumped against my shoulder
blade. The in and out of his breath drew my own heart into a gentle
rhythm, like a sedative. “Not really.”

I didn’t want to be calmed. I wanted to kill
her. I pushed against him, bending my head down to where he held
me.

“Don’t
even
think about biting me,”
Ryker warned, his breath hissing down the back of my neck. “Or I
will bite you back.”

The rage I felt quickly sizzled into
something less violent, though just as primal. I sucked air through
my nose harshly, my limbs shaking with built-up energy.

“I’m not going to tell you to calm down
because it will only piss you off,” Ryker mumbled into my ear, his
voice taut. I snorted.
Damn, this man knows me
. “But I want
you to breathe with me.”

I could only feel his chest moving against my
back. I squeezed my lids shut, and I slowed my exhalations with
his.

“Are you kidd—” My eyes shot open at the
sound of Amara’s voice. I felt Ryker stiffen behind me. I could
only imagine the look he sent her to shut her up so quickly.

She stayed quiet till my heart rate had come
back down.

“Are you okay now?” Ryker stood rigid behind
me, his body shaking.

I nodded, but the sight of the plum-haired
turncoat in front of me plunged another dagger of fury into my
system.

“Good.” He loosened his grip. “Croygen, take
her.” Shit. He had fought his desire to kill me in order to calm me
down.

“No way. She’s like some wild animal.”

“Croy-gen,” Ryker hissed through his
teeth.