Full Circle (Rockin' Country #3) (6 page)

Knowing they really didn’t have a lot of time, he sped up his thrusts, wanting them both to get there, needing to prove to her that he could please them both. When he felt her hand come behind her and grab his thigh, he grasped the hand and moved it to the front of her body to her core. “Take us both there, babe. Take us both there.”

She knew what he wanted, and as she worked her hand against herself, she touched him too. She loved the hard grunts coming from his mouth, the breathless gasps coming from hers, and she hoped that nobody was close enough to hear this. She knew they should have some control and some willpower, but this was exciting, and she was thankful she had a husband who was willing to do these types of things with her.

“I’m there,” he growled in her ear, his thrusts picking up speed as he buried his face in her neck to smother the sound of his completion.

“Me too.” Hannah thrust back against him, having no control over her body. It had a mind of its own as she ground against him, against her hand, against both their bodies. It all felt amazingly good, and she knew she had to keep herself under control. “Reaper,” she breathed, and right then he saved her, bringing his hand up to cover her mouth, allowing her to bite into the flesh as she gave her body over to the rush.

Minutes later, when he’d finally stopped pulsing inside her and they’d collapsed against each other, hearts pounding, her alarm went off.

“Crap,” she laughed.

“Don’t worry,” he cleared his throat, fighting against the lethargy. “I’m the front man, they aren’t gonna leave without me.”

She couldn’t help it, she giggled against his conceited answer. One day she’d have to put a stop to his ego, but at times like this, she loved this part of his personality. “C’mon, let’s get cleaned up.” She pushed against where he had layered himself against her back.

“You keep pushing against my dick like that and we won’t be going anywhere,” he threatened, his eyes meeting hers in the mirror.

She could think of worse ways to spend a night, but she kept that thought to herself.

*  *  *

February

“A
re you coming in for Valentine’s Day next week?” Hannah asked Shell as the two of them FaceTimed. Hannah was getting ready for the Grammy awards. Miracle of all miracles, she and Garrett had been nominated; their song just making the cut off. To say she was nervous was an understatement, so she did what she always did: talked to her best friend.

Shell bit her lip. “I’m not sure. I have a lot of work to do. This stuff is way fucking harder than I thought it would be. I mean like a million times harder than I thought it would be, but I want to. Damn, do I want to. I miss all y’all, and I so wish I was there for you tonight.”

Hannah said what Shell wouldn’t or couldn’t. She still couldn’t get a feel for the two of them. “You mean you miss Jared, and it’s okay that you’re not here tonight. It’s going to be Garrett and me. We’re both very nervous, but excited at the same time”

“Well yeah, but it doesn’t do any good to complain about it, and there’s nothing that I can do about it, at this point. I hate missing out on huge accomplishments like this. You could win as not only performer but songwriter, Hannah. Don’t you realize how special that is?”

“I do realize how special that is, but this is
my life
right now, and the two of us are on separate paths. I wouldn’t want you to change anything for me. I understand, but I’m kind of worried about Jared. He misses you too, and so do I, but he really misses you.” She struggled with how much to tell her, because most of what she had to tell were observations and not words that had been spoken aloud. He was still just as quiet as ever, but his emotions were starting to come through in the way he watched her and Garrett, the way he glanced at the screen of his cell phone when he thought no one else looked. On accident, Hannah had found out a picture of Shell was his lock screen.

Shell thought it was nice to hear that from someone, because she wondered sometimes. “I can never really tell when I talk to him. Sometimes I think it, but he acts like things are fucking amazing.”

“I seriously think that’s a defense mechanism with him. He doesn’t want you to feel bad about deciding to go do this for yourself. He doesn’t want to be the reason you don’t follow your dreams,” Hannah tried her best to explain. The many conversations she and Jared had while putting puzzles together played through her mind. He, like the rest of them, was a master at hiding things he didn’t want others to see.

“Is he having a hard time?” Shell asked. “And I don’t mean with me not being there, I’m talking about the other stuff.”

That was one of the major things Hannah had worried about when she decided to go on tour with them. If Jared went back to using drugs, would she be able to handle it? So far that hadn’t been a problem. He hadn’t even touched wine or beer. “So far, so good, but I know he needs to see you soon. Heck, I need to see you soon. It’s been almost five weeks.”

Tears pooled in Shell’s eyes, and she had a hard time talking against the lump in her throat. “I know, it’s been forever.”

Hannah knew she may hate herself for doing this, but she had to ask, she had to put it out there. She couldn’t stand for a friend, a sister, to look this miserable. “Nobody is going to think badly of you if you decide this is something you don’t want to do. You’ll always be paid as part of my management group—even if I decide not to go back to singing. There will always be something for you to do. You don’t have to do this to prove a point to anyone.”

“Not even to myself?” she whispered. “I was so gung ho about it, how I was going to show everyone how strong I am, but I’m not. Fuck, I miss you all, and I’m a hot mess when it comes to the campus life too. Most of the classes are online, but I have to go to campus for two of them, and even though we’re roughly the same age as the seniors, they are so fucking immature.”

“Then why are you doing this to yourself, honey?” Hannah asked softly. There was no reason for her to be pushing herself.

“Because I’m stubborn and I want to see the things I start through. I’m not a quitter.” Her voice was as strong as she could make it, but even then it was still weak. They could both hear it.

If there was one thing Hannah would have never labeled her friend, it was quitter. “No, you aren’t, and just because you’ve tried something and you’ve found it’s not for you doesn’t mean you’re a quitter either. It means you gave it your best shot and it just didn’t work out.”

“Have I given it my best shot?” She was weakening. God, she missed her friends.

“Only you can answer that.” It killed Hannah to see her friend looking like this. “What I’m saying to you is if you’re doing this as some sort of way to prove to yourself you can stand without me, stop. You hold me up most of the time. If you’re doing this to prove you can live without Jared, stop.”

Shell opened her mouth, but Hannah cut her off, holding up her hand to the screen of the cell phone. The universal sign for “let me have my peace.”

“If you’re doing this because you want to further your education, then please continue. But I’m here to tell you, nothing is worth being as miserable as you look. Stop punishing yourself and come join us on the road.”

“I wanna give it one more week. I want to make sure I’m not making a knee-jerk reaction and I’m not jealous because y’all are traveling together and I’m not used to being alone.”

“One more week,” Hannah conceded. “Then you decide. It’s tearing me apart to see you look as sad as you do, Jared to look as sad as he does, and for me to miss my best friend. There’s no sense in this. It’s BS.” She frowned as she caught the time on her phone. “I really gotta go because I have to meet Garrett to do the red carpet.”

They talked for a few more minutes before hanging up.

“Did you talk some sense into her?”

Hannah wasn’t surprised Jared had been listening to her conversation with his girlfriend. It was only going to be her and her husband at the awards show, but the band had flown in to show support, and Stacey was spending the night with Brad. Garrett still wasn’t happy about his sister in a relationship with a band member. She still had awkward moments when anyone mentioned the dinner where he and Brad had almost comes to blows. “I hope so, but you never know with her.”

“I’ve been trying to talk her into coming with us for weeks. Maybe she cares about you enough to do it.”

The way he said it made her heart constrict. “Oh Jared, she cares about you, but she’s scared.”

“And she doesn’t think I am? Love is scary.” He rubbed his chest, pulling his lip ring between his teeth.

A small smile played on Hannah’s lips. This was the first time he’d ever alluded, at least to her in words, that he loved her friend. “Love is very scary, but sometimes you have to throw up your hands and let it lead you whichever way it may.”

“Kinda like letting Jesus take the wheel?” His tone was dry.

She laughed. “Exactly like that. Maybe that should be your new motto.”

“Ha! They’d send me straight to hell.”

He got up, walking out of the lounge area as she called out words to his back. “I have a feelin’ she’ll be here for Valentine’s Day! You better have a good gift for her, or else you’ll have to answer to me.”

Laughter could be heard in the commons area of the hotel, and she could tell the guys were laughing at her, but that was okay. If it helped Shell become a more permanent part of their lives on the road, they could laugh at her all they wanted to. It wasn’t the first time, and she was sure it wouldn’t be the last.

*  *  *

“A
re you sure you have everything you need?”

Hannah felt like she and Garrett were going to the prom. He’d posted a ton of pictures of them on Instagram, and they’d posed for even more so that the band and management could take pictures of them together. Now Stacey and Marie were situating them this way, and that, trying to make sure that they looked flawless together.

“I have everything,” Hannah assured them.

“Garrett, make sure you help her when she steps out of the limo,” Marie told her son as she shook out the train on Hannah’s dress, a Cavalli number that had been expressed for her.

He rolled his eyes at his wife, pulling a face that caused her to giggle. “Mom, I think I got my wife, it’s good.”

“I’m just so proud.” She pulled them both into a hug.

Garrett pulled back and looked at Hannah in a way that made her heart stop and breath become shallow. “If anyone’s proud, it’s me. All I did was sing on it; she wrote it. This night is hers. Tonight I’m the arm candy.”

She fought to keep the tears out of her eyes. Garrett was normally sweet, but those words were some of the most romantic she had ever heard in her entire life. Songwriting was something she loved and she thought she was good at, but she’d never been recognized for it before. This was definitely a special night for her. “Thank you, but you are way more than arm candy. You’re gonna be the thing that keeps me sane when we perform in front of everyone tonight.”

That was something
he
was nervous about. He could hold a crowd of peers in the palm of his hand; the Grammys was a contemporary music crowd, and he wasn’t sure anyone would know who the fuck he was. He would do it for her, because for her he would do anything, but it didn’t mean he was completely comfortable with it.

“We need to get goin’,” she told him as she glanced at the time on her phone and stuck it in her clutch.

“Alright.” Marie came up to them, holding two plastic shot glasses. “Let’s do a celebration toast real fast and then send these two on their way.”

Everyone held up their shot glasses, except Jared, who held a bottle of water, and toasted them for good luck.

*     *     *