Gay for Pay: An All Cocks Story (All Cocks Stories) (Volume 1) (2 page)

Waking up in the hospital alone because no one you knew could bear to be in the same room with you. The trial that not only tore apart Chris’s once close knit family, but rocked their small Alabama town. Losing his dream of playing football for the NFL, partly because of his poor decision making abilities, and partly because of the permanent injury to his spine in the accident. While he remembered every event with striking clarity, nothing tore at his soul more than what he did to Amanda.

Michael and his boyfriend Max were the only shining light in Chris’s otherwise dark life. Michael left for college in New York not long after the trial, and convinced Chris to come with him. Chris quickly agreed knowing there was nothing left for him in Alabama. Truth be told, he didn’t really feel like he belonged anywhere, still convinced his life should have ended the night he killed his girlfriend. Michael was his strength, the brother he never had, and he helped Chris find some semblance of a life in New York.

Chris was pulled out of the misery of his memories by the loud music shaking the windows of the building he was passing. Looking up, he was drawn closer to the building by the bright lights that flashed and matched the beat of the bass perfectly. The closer Chris got to the doors the louder the music got, and the lights were almost blinding. Oddly, once he entered the building the music became hypnotic, and the darkness would have enveloped the large space within if not for the pulsating light show coming from the middle of the room.

Slowly circling the room, he took in his surroundings. There were different sized cages circling the lights and the DJ in the middle of the room, cages that held nearly naked men in various stages of undress. They were dancing, kissing, groping and in one cage, Chris was certain they were fucking. As he came around behind the center stage he saw there were several chairs and couches lined up against a back wall, and there was a man between another man’s legs, head bobbing up and down keeping time with the beat of the music.

He stood frozen in place for a minute, staring at what was obviously a man giving another man head, right there out in the open. He wasn’t staring out of disgust, more disbelief. How was it, these men were so brazenly open about what they were doing, and the place wasn’t swarming with cops? And how was it Chris lived just a few miles away and had never noticed this place before. Michael and Max would be in heaven here, he thought.

Making his way over to where he saw a bar set up, Chris ordered a rum and coke then turned and leaned back against the bar, just watching and taking it all in.

“Well hello there gorgeous! Haven’t seen you round these parts before.” A petite blonde had walked up to the bar next to Chris and was eyeing him like Chris usually eyed a steak.

Chris laughed out loud, “So gay men’s pick up lines are just as bad as us straight guys eh?” Chris smiled at the smaller man.

Chris thought he may have offended the little guy for a minute, but then he threw his head back and barked out a high pitched laugh, then straightened and smacked Chris harder than he would have thought possible on his much larger bicep. He mock flinched, “Ouch!” and grabbed his arm, still smiling though.

The little guy shoved his hand toward Chris’s chest and he took it before shaking. “Name’s Colby, and who says I’m gay?” he winked at Chris before turning toward the bar and ordering a Cosmo.

“That right there little man, that says you’re gay.” Chris laughed.

“Oh ha ha, and what is your beverage of choice Jolly? Jack and coke? Budweiser?” Colby was trying hard to come across as serious, Chris could tell, but the smile never left his eyes, so Chris knew he was messing with him.

“Close, Rum and coke. Jolly?”

“You know, the jolly green giant.” Colby winked at him again.

“Funny. I’m Chris, nice to meet you Colby.” They both turned and watched the mass of bodies dancing, writhing, kissing and touching on the dance floor just in front of where they stood. Chris didn’t know what else to say, so he didn’t say anything. He kept stealing glances out of the corner of his eye at the man that stood next to him, Colby stood there with his head bobbing to the beat of the music, smiling and watching the scenery before him.

Just about the time the silence bordered on awkward, Colby nudged Chris’s arm with his elbow, “So,” Colby leaned closer to Chris, making sure he could hear him over the loud music. “Are you really straight? Or are you bi? OH, is it my lucky day and you are bi-curious?” Colby waggled his eyebrows.

Chris laughed at him, shaking his head. “Nope, sorry man, I’m as straight as a board. But don’t worry, I got no problem with the lifestyle, my best friend and his boyfriend live together so I’ve spent a lot of time around gay guys and couples. Doesn’t bother me in the least.”

Colby nodded his head as he tipped back the pink drink and took a large swig, the silence was creeping in on them once more, and then Colby nudged Chris’s shoulder again. “Can I tell you a secret?” Chris simply nodded. “My name is not really Colby, its Colton.”

“So you use a fake name just in case you don’t like a guy or something.” Chris asked.

“Or something,” Colby, no. Colton said. “Gay boy 101 when you live in the big apple, never use your real name unless it’s family or someone you know you can trust.”

“And you think you can trust me?” Chris asked, attempting to leer at his new friend. Colton threw his head back and laughed again, but this time Chris dodged the swipe at his arm.

Colton frowned at Chris when he sat his empty glass on the bar and ordered a glass of water instead of another drink. “You driving?” he asked. Chris shook his head. “Then why the water?”

“I have a one drink rule, and before you ask, don’t. Let’s just say, alcohol and I have a history, an ugly one, so I consume in moderation when I drink.” Chris stared down at the smaller man, waiting to see what his reaction would be.

Colton just eyed him for a few seconds before smiling and shrugging his shoulders. “Ah, well, more for me then!”

Chris laughed at his new friend. After a few more rounds of water, cosmos and some pleasant conversation, Chris asked Colton where the bathrooms were and they headed off in that direction. More than once Chris had to hold Colton up, the cosmos working their magic, turning Colton’s legs to jelly. When Chris was washing his hands after, he noticed a stack of fliers sitting on the counter. Grabbing one he skimmed over it then turned to Colton, “What’s this place? Do you know?” he asked.

“Ah yes, All Cocks, the end all be all of gay porn.” Colton sort of sang the words instead of speaking them. “I thought about it once, its good money, but I have this fear of public speaking, so I don’t think I could even be on camera much less have sex on camera. Jesus, but the models on that site are H.O. double T… HOT!” Colton fanned himself with his hand and Chris just laughed.

Colton shook his hands out instead of drying them, and then ran his damp fingers through his hair, taming the unruly blonde locks. He continued to ramble on as he headed out of the restroom with Chris following behind, but not before grabbing a flyer and folding it, tucking it into his back pocket.

***

In the weeks that followed their initial meeting at the club, Colton became a permanent fixture in Chris’s life. Chris loved the little mans fearless attitude and his personality was infectious. He was always happy and energetic; he reminded Chris a lot of the bunny rabbit that beat the drum on those commercials. Michael and Max immediately warmed to the young man as well, and having Colton around to hang out with and join the three of them for dinner and movies made Chris feel less like a third wheel.

There was an unseasonably nice afternoon one Saturday when they’d planned to see a movie and maybe introduce Michael and Max to club Berlin. Since the weather in the city was unseasonably nice, Chris decided to grill and they hung out on their rooftop garden instead. He sent Max out on a beer run while he and Michael started getting the burgers ready. When Colton arrived he helped them carry the food and extras upstairs to the roof. “Wow, it’s so nice out today, and the garden is starting to bloom,” Colton noted.

The rooftop garden wasn’t very large. It was an open area that held a large picnic table with benches, a couple of patio chairs, a grill and along the perimeter of the building, adjacent to the wall, was an L shaped garden with wooden boxes that housed plants, herbs and a several rose bushes. Chris had just fired up the grill when Max joined them, dragging the wheeled cooler full of beer behind him. Chris turned when Max hollered his name and caught the can of Budweiser that sailed toward his head.

Chris stoked the fire and smiled as he listened to Michael telling Colton about a co-worker of his that he wanted to set Colton up on a blind date with. Other than that, he wasn’t paying any attention to what was taking place behind him. He set the uncooked patties on the grill along with some corn and veggies wrapped in foil, completely unaware that Max had grabbed an empty planter and filled it with ice and water, until he felt the cold water tickling his spine.

Chris jumped and yelped at the same time, “Fucking son of a bitch!” he whirled around to three smiling faces. Colton was laughing so hard he almost fell of his bench. Chris jerked his now wet shirt over his head and turned slightly, balling it up and chunking it at his best friends head. Michael just laughed at him, catching the shirt in the air before it could make contact with his face, then tossing it back at Chris’s feet. He didn’t even think about the fact he wasn’t wearing his usual wife beater under the shirt, or the fact that his jeans were sitting low on his hips until he heard Colton gasp.

“Oh my god Chris, what the hell happened to you?!” Colton screeched.

“Oh, Chris, I’m sorry, I didn’t think…” Max was rambling when Chris turned, a half smile half grimace plastered on his handsome face.

“S’okay Max, Colton was going to find out eventually. Let me just get these burgers plated and I’ll tell you the story behind the scar Col.” Chris’s voice was calm, to spite the warning bells that were gonging inside his head. This was it, time to tell Colton about the accident and Amanda and see if he ran, like everyone else.

Colton stared at Chris’s back while he calmly finished cooking the food. There was a large Raven taking flight that stretched from shoulder to shoulder across Chris’s upper back, then the cross on his lower back in the area most people referred to as the tramp stamp. What caught Colton’s attention at first was that the cross was sideways instead of standing straight up as it should. When Colton strained to see the detailing inside the cross was when he noticed the mottled skin underneath. It looked almost like Chris had been burned, but the scarred skin was trapped inside the confines of the tattoo.

The longer Colton stared, the more the scarring stood out in comparison to the tattoo and he wasn’t sure how he’d missed it before. When Chris turned and gave him a sad smile, Colton felt ashamed for staring and diverted his gaze to his beer bottle, picking at the label for something to do. He jerked slightly when he felt a firm grip on his shoulder, looking up at Chris who was smiling down at him.

Chris sat the plate of burgers in the middle of the table then slid onto the bench seat next to Colton and started building his burger before he spoke again. “So, you know that Michael and I grew up together and that I was supposed to go to Bama on a football scholarship, but that fell through and Michael convinced me to move here to New York with him.” Colton nodded, he did know all that. There had been a car accident he remembered, Chris was hurt in the accident and that ended his dream of playing football, he didn’t know much more than that about that time in Chris’s life.

“Well, what I haven’t told you, what I never tell anyone, is what happened the night of the accident.”

“Chris, you don’t have to…” Colton was cut off with a wave of Chris’s hand.

“Yes Col I do, you should know the truth, that I’m a murderer.” Colton drew back a little, his hand covering his mouth as he stared at Chris in shock. Michael slammed his beer bottle down on the table across from them, making both Chris and Colton jump, jerking their heads around.

“Goddammit Chris, don’t say it like that!” he shouted, so angry he turned red in the face. “Is Amanda dead, yes she is, was it your fault, yes it was, but it was an accident Chris. They call them accidents for a fucking reason! You screwed up and you’ve paid for that and then some. If you want to tell Colton the story then tell him, but do not I repeat, do not call yourself a murderer again! Not in front of me!” Max wrapped his arms around Michael’s waist and turned him, burying his boyfriend’s head under his chin, whispering for him to calm down.

Max was sorely used to this routine after five years. Chris was always too hard on himself when talking about the accident. It was as if Chris thought the self-deprecating approach he had to his memories were some sort of penance on his part, like he had to make himself out to be the biggest monster on the planet in order to make up for his mistakes. So Max did what he always did, he held Michael until he calmed down and in turn, calmed Chris down.

After a few intense minutes of awkward silence, Michael unwrapped himself from Max’s embrace and turned to face Chris again, his eyes red and brimming with unshed tears. When Colton stole a glance in Chris’s direction he saw his face was flushed and his eyes too were misty. He turned to face Chris again and reached over, gently patting his friend on the arm. “Okay Chris, tell me what happened the night of the accident; let me decide for myself how I want to see you after I hear your story, okay.”