Goblins on the Prowl (7 page)

“Why do you talk the way you do? Are you from another country?”

“No, I just have a
w
pwobwem.”

“But you say
w
just fine.”

“Yes, I have no pwobwem with
w
. My pwobwem is with
w
and
w
.”

“What?” I asked, totally confused.

“You know,
w
, as in ‘wabbit' and ‘wittiw.' If I see a tiny bunny and twy to say, ‘What a nice wittiw wabbit,' it comes out ‘What a nice wittiw wabbit' instead of . . . of what I twied to say.”

“Ah!” I said, starting to understand.

“My pawents had the same pwobwem. They intended to name me . . .” She paused, and I could tell she was struggling with the word. Finally she said, “They meant to have my name sound diffewent. But when the pwiest asked what they wanted to name me, Motheh said, ‘Bwoonhiwda!' So that was what he wote in the Big Book of Names.” She sighed. “This has caused many pwobwems in my wife.”

“I'll bet.”

“Chiwdwen can be vewy cwuel,” she added softly.

It was strange to hear this woman, so big and strong, speak this way.

“Thank you for explaining,” I said.

“No pwobwem. Now wet's get some west!”

I was asleep and dreaming almost instantly. Unfortunately, the dreams all involved giant toads chasing me through dark caverns.

They ended when I heard William shout, “Fauna! Fauna, can you hear me?”

I opened my eyes. William was standing beside my bed!

To my horror, I could see right through him. And Solomon's Collar was tingling the way it did whenever I saw Werdolphus.

“William!” I cried. “Are you dead?”

When a great heart is hidden in an ugly body, much grief and longing can result. This is a particularly human problem. We goblins are all ugly, and take some pride in it!

—Stanklo the Scribbler

CHAPTER TEN

AN UNEXPECTED VISIT

William laughed. “I'm not dead, you goof. I just drank some of that Sleep Walk stuff you brought me from Granny Pinchbottom.”

I sighed in relief. “But how did you find us?”

“It was
you
I could find. I think it's that collar. It was like it drew me to you. I bet that's also why you can see me, since from what Granny Pinchbottom told you, I should be invisible when I'm doing a Sleep Walk.”

He said something else, but I couldn't understand it because Bwoonhiwda started to snore.

William glanced at the big woman. “Who is
that
?”

“Let's go into the other room,” I said. “It will be
easier to talk. I'll explain there . . . 
after
you finish telling me your story!”

William nodded, then drifted through the closed door.

I had to open it to follow him.

Once we were in the main room, I said, “If you traveled here from your body, you can lead us back to it, right?”

He shook his head. “I didn't follow any kind of path to get here. I just floated up through rock!
That
was the scariest thing yet! Thank goodness it happened quickly. If it had gone on much longer, I might have lost my mind.”

“I think you'd better back up and tell this from the beginning.”

“I was awake for only some of it. That dratted toad clonked my head against a tree while it was hopping away from the castle and knocked me senseless. When I finally woke up, we were in the forest. I had a horrible headache, but at least I wasn't in his mouth anymore!”

“Where were you?”

“On the ground between his front legs! He was crouched over me, protecting me.”

“From what?”

“Goblins! It was weird. They kept shouting ‘Blackstone! Blackstone!'”

I shuddered. “The goblins who searched my cottage were shouting that too. Also the ones who attacked us.”

“WHAT?”

Quickly I told him about those incidents, then filled him in on what had happened after the toad had hopped away with him. When I got to the part about the Baron, my voice caught before I could finish.

“What?” asked William. “What's wrong?”

“The Baron is in danger,” I whispered. Then I explained about the magical sleep.

William looked sick. “This is my fault! I never should have started reading from that book.”

“We were both part of it,” I said, not wanting him to take all the blame.

He looked at me. “You didn't see what happened after I started reading, did you?”

“What do you mean?”

“I couldn't stop! It was like something had . . . I don't know . . . taken me over and was using me to read the book out loud. It was the creepiest feeling.”

“I wondered why you kept going. That really is creepy. Now tell me what else happened with the goblins
that attacked you. Oh! Did they have red headbands?”

“Yeah. How did you know?”

“The goblins who searched my cottage, and the ones who attacked us last night, were wearing them. It's like some kind of uniform. All right. Go on with your story.”

“Well, the toad kept whapping the goblins with his tongue. He didn't wrap it around them. Instead, he used it like a superlong arm. It reminded me of Igor with his bear. If the toad whacked a goblin with his tongue, it would go flying. They kept trying to get at us, but after the toad knocked out four of them, the others gave up. They picked up the ones who were down and carried them away.”

“And they didn't come back?”

“We moved on.”

“Did the toad put you into his mouth again?”

“No. He flattened down and looked at me. I could tell he wanted me to climb onto his back. Since he had protected me from the goblins—and since I had no idea where we were or how to get home—I figured I might as well go with him.” He smiled. “It's almost like flying when he makes a jump. Hurts when he lands, though. And I have to hold on tight. We're in a cave now, pretty far underground.”

“In Nilbog?”

“I don't know. The toad is asleep. He put himself in front of the entrance to block it. Whether he did that to keep me in or keep goblins out, I have no idea. After he dozed off, I decided it was time to try a Sleep Walk.”

“Did you come straight here?”

“First I tried to investigate where I was. Turns out I can move really fast this way, and it's not tiring at all. But I couldn't figure out much because there's almost no light, just a little of that glowing fungus. The good thing is, I could always sense where my body was, so I wasn't worried about getting lost.”

“You haven't been out too long, have you? Remember, you've got a two-hour limit. If you pass it, you won't be able to get back in.”

“Oh, I remember.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the watch the Baron had given him. “I'm using this to keep track.”

I smiled. “Good thing your clothes and stuff come with you.”

“Definitely better than floating around naked!” he agreed. Then he shook his head. “Karl was right. We should have left that book alone!”

I wanted to deny this, but clearly it was true. To change the subject I said, “Are you scared?”

William looked as if this was the stupidest question he had ever heard. “‘Terrified' would be more like it! What's weird is that being out of my body seems to help.”

“Really? Going on a Sleep Walk sounds pretty scary to me.”

“It is. But not being in my body means I don't feel the things you usually do when you're frightened.” He held out his hands. “See? No trembling. And my heart isn't pounding. So my body—or whatever you would call what I am right now—isn't
acting
like I'm afraid. And that helps me stay calm. “ He looked down at his see-through self. “Wish I could say the same for my brain. Part of it is screaming.” He paused, then said, “I can't tell for sure, Fauna, but I think the toad is frightened too. I wish I had that collar of yours. Then maybe I could talk to him and figure out what's going on.”

While I was trying to beat down a flash of guilt, he looked at his watch again. “Yow! I'd better get going!”

“William!” I said as he started to disappear.

“Yes?”

“I'm glad you're alive!”

“Me too. And thanks for looking for me!”

With that, he was gone.

When I returned to the room I shared with Bwoonhiwda, the sound of her snores almost knocked me backward. I had been lucky enough to fall asleep before that racket had started, but I didn't think I could go back to sleep while it was going on. So I gathered my blankets and dragged them into the main room to make a bed on the floor.

Since we hadn't gone to sleep until almost dawn, it was late when we woke. When I stretched and sat up, a snooty voice said, “I thought you were going to sleep forever!”

Werdolphus had returned.

“Any news from Karl?” I asked.

The ghost shook his head. “Library man has come up dry so far. But he sends his greetings.”

“How about the Baron?”

“No change. He hasn't gotten any worse, which is good. But they still can't wake him. Hulda is keeping watch by his bedside. She's really frightened for him.”

I felt a twinge of guilt. To change the subject I asked, “How long did it take you to make the trip?”

“How should I know? I had no way to time it.”

“Do you want to try? I've got a watch.”

“All right. Could be fun. Mark the time. I'll head for the castle and be back as soon as I can.”

I took out the watch and flipped open the top. “Ready? GO!”

Werdolphus vanished . . . and returned in less than two minutes.

“Even I am impressed,” he said when I told him the time. “But it took a lot out of me. First time I've felt tired since I died!”

Bwoonhiwda called me to breakfast. I had been annoyed when Hulda insisted we wait for her to pack some food before we set out, but now I was glad of it. Having to hunt for our meal would have slowed us down. Even with the food at hand, it was late afternoon before we got moving.

When it was time to start, Igor said, “Igor help pull wagon!”

Bwoonhiwda snorted. “You would just swow me down!”

Igor's face crumpled, and he looked like he was going to cry.

Bwoonhiwda sighed. “Sit on top and give diwections! Wemember, you ah the onwy one who knows the way to the giant!”

“Igor good direction giver!” he crowed as he scrambled up the ladder on the side of the wagon. He positioned himself where a driver would usually sit. I followed him up, as did Herky. Werdolphus, of course, just floated along as he pleased.

Bwoonhiwda started out at a walk. That was impressive enough, considering that she was pulling the wagon with all of us on it. But once we came to the road, she took off at a fast trot.

The road wound through the forest. The afternoon sun was bright on the leaves, which were a wild mix of red, orange, and yellow. The only sound was the thud of Bwoonhiwda's boots. The air was crisp with the smell of autumn. If I hadn't been so worried about William, the ride would have been quite nice.

But I was, so it wasn't.

It did help to know he was still alive, or at least had been a few hours before. But there was no telling what the toad—or the goblins—might do if we couldn't rescue him. I wanted to move faster! Still, I knew we were going faster than we would have on foot.

Herky couldn't sit still for long, of course. Soon he was climbing up and down the sides of the wagon, or scampering from side to side on the roof.

“You're going to fall!” I warned him.

“Herky not fall!” he replied cheerfully, just before he tumbled over the edge.

“Bwoonhiwda!” I cried. “Stop!”

She thudded to a halt. “What's wong?”

“Herky fell off!”

Bwoonhiwda sighed. “Bettah go get him.”

I would have thought she would welcome a chance to rest, but she sounded annoyed.

I climbed down from the wagon and ran back toward Herky. When I saw that he wasn't moving, panic surged through me.

“Herky!” I cried. “Herky, are you all right?”

Nothing. Not even a groan.

I knelt beside the little annoyance and put my ear to his chest. He wasn't breathing! I reached into my pocket and pulled out the ball of blue goo, then broke off a glob and shoved it into his mouth.

I heard something beside me, and realized Igor was there. “Herky all right?” he asked, squeezing his bear nervously.

“I don't know, Igor.”

As I spoke, the little goblin's eyes fluttered open and he spit out the goo.

“Herky all owiee!” he moaned.

“I told you to hold still,” I answered sharply, feeling
free to be angry now that I knew he was all right.

“Stinky girl,” he whimpered, even as he held out his arms for me to pick him up.

I carried him back to the wagon, opened the door, and shoved him in.

“Stay here,” I ordered.

“Girl mean!”

“Girl in a hurry. We have to find William. What if you slow us down again and something bad happens to him because we didn't get there soon enough?”

Herky's eyes widened. He nodded that he understood.

When I climbed back to the top of the wagon, I called to Bwoonhiwda that we could start again. As I settled in beside Igor, I noticed he was clutching his bear more tightly than usual.

“What's the matter?”

“Won't tell?”

“Cross my heart,” I said, doing just that.

“Igor want to be Bwoonhiwda's friend. She so beautiful and strong, it make Igor's heart hurt. But Igor don't know how to do it!” He looked at me, and I saw tears in his eyes. “Fauna know how?”

“Sorry, Igor. I don't know much about making friends either.”

After that we rode in silence until I said, “How much farther to John's cave?”

Igor pointed to the left. “See mountain? That where old Bonecracker live.”

It was hard to tell how far away the mountain really was, but about an hour later Igor called, “Bwoon­hiwda! Stop. Road go wrong way now. Have to walk.”

Bwoonhiwda thudded to a halt. She was breathing heavily but other than that showed no sign of the fact that she had been hauling a heavy wagon for hours.

Igor scrambled to the ground. “Got to go that way,” he said, pointing into the woods.

“Aw wight,” said Bwoonhiwda. “But we have to hide the wagon.” Looking up at me, she called, “Fauna! Stand in the woad and wet me know when you can no wonger see us.”

I climbed down and watched as she guided the wagon through the trees.

“That's it!” I called when she was out of sight.