Going Long (17 page)

“Is she going to lose her
scholarship?” I asked, curling one side of my lip and squinting my eyes to
brace myself for more bad news.

Sarah just sighed at first. “I
don’t know. She won’t talk about it,” she said. “I think her grades are good
enough to give her a shot to make up for it in the spring. But Reed? I’m not so
sure she can pull it together—not without talking to someone.”

I wasn’t sure what she meant by
that, and it killed me to think of Noles being so depressed and not having
anyone to talk to about it, especially when I was supposed to be that one
person,
her
person. I just looked down and pulled Sarah’s hand into me
so I could hug her now. I kissed the top of her head a little and thanked her
for being a good friend. I felt her body weight fall under my embrace and, when
she looked up at me, her eyes were glossy. I just smiled faintly, understanding
her love for Nolan.

“Sar? Can you tell me one
thing?” I said, leaning back to look at her again.

“What?” She was back to being
tough, clearly her way of keeping her emotions in check. It made me laugh a
little as I pulled her in for more dancing.

“Where’s Gavin in all of this? I
mean, I get it…you don’t want to tell me about him…and what he and Nolan are…or
do…or did…or whatever. But Sar, I gotta know. Did he just sleep with her, and
ditch her once he got what he wanted?” I asked, my brow pinched, while my head
tried to work everything out before she laid it on me.

Sarah just stiffened at my question,
her feet stopping, and her face looking down at them. Her gaze flashed to mine
in an instant then, her face confused and full of worry. “Reed…you know she
never
slept with Gavin, right?” She said, her words slapping me in the face and
fighting against everything I had believed for weeks.

“Uh…what do you mean?” I said,
backing away a little, my hands dropping to my sides.

“I mean…Nolan. Never. Slept.
With. Gavin,” she said it slowly and punctuated each word, drilling it into me,
and angry at my accusation.

“Fuck!” I said backing away from
Sarah faster now and heading for the front door. She followed me out.

I was pacing now in the dirt
parking lot in front of my Jeep. I kicked a rock so hard it dinged off of one
of my doors, and then pushed my hands through my hair and tilted my head up to
look at the stars. “You’re fucking kidding me!” I screamed loudly enough to
turn a few heads of others that were just walking into the bar. Embarrassed, I
put up a hand in an apologetic wave. Sarah was frozen, just watching me pace
and work out everything in my racing mind. I stopped right in front of her and
put my hands on either shoulder.

“Sarah. You’re telling me that
Nolan never slept with Gavin?” I wanted to hear her say it again.

“Reed. I can’t believe you’d
even ask that,” her forehead was wrinkled like my words weren’t even making
sense. She shook her head slowly at me in disappointment, and I just started
pacing again.

“I can’t believe that fucker,” I
said under my breath. Sarah caught my arm to stop me then.

“What fucker?” she gritted
through her teeth now.

“Gavin. I came to see her, not
long after we fought. You know, when I found out that she’d kissed him? He was
coming out of her room, and he said that he’d spent the night,” I hung my head
feeling foolish that I believed him.

“Fuck! That asshole played me to
get me out of his way. And I just fucking waved him right in,” I thought.

I was sick, and felt like I was
going to throw up, though I’d only had a few sips of a beer. Suddenly, I needed
to talk to Nolan more than anything in the entire world. I left Sarah standing
in the parking lot and stormed back into the Wheelhouse and found Sean still
sitting at the bar. He was working on his second beer now. I looked around a
bit for Nolan but didn’t see her, instead Trig was just playing pool with a few
other guys. Urgency must have been oozing from my pores, because Sean caught on
quickly.

“She’s dancing with one of those
dudes,” he said, tilting his head to the dance floor. Some local in a cowboy
hat was spinning her around the floor, and she was laughing. Where moments ago
I was conflicted between loving the sight of her smile and resenting her for
it, now I only appreciated it more than the air I was breathing. She looked
happy—simply, deliriously and absolutely happy. I had missed those
carefree eyes, and when I thought about the tears that fell from them on the
day you’re supposed to be thankful, I felt like the biggest asshole ever.

I leaned into the bar for the
entire song, just watching her, soaking her in. She was suddenly flawless. I
could look at her without seeing Gavin, and my gut sank thinking of how much
suffering she had endured. I was lost in her when I started a little as someone
pushed me off balance from the bar, falling to one knee just to catch myself.

“Hey, bro,” Jason said, reaching
his hand out to catch a hold of me. I grabbed it, and stared him down as I got
back to my feet, and brushed off the dirt from my jeans.

“What are you doing here?” I
asked, completely uninterested in his lame-ass attempt at bonding.

“Hmmm. Nice, little brother,” he
said, taking a drink from his beer bottle and setting it back down on the bar.
I hated that he called me
little brother
. He’d always done it. Just
another part of his faulty personality and constant need to make sure I knew I
was less than he was. Truth was, though, I was ten times the athlete Jason was,
and the attention I was getting was killing him.

“Dylan wanted to come check this
place out. She likes karaoke,” he made a sour face as he spoke. I think Jason
liked the idea of being with someone
like
Dylan more than he actually
liked
her
. Even more, though, I think he liked the fact that our mother
praised him for picking such a
lovely girl
. My mom’s need to marry one
of us off to the Nichols family was, apparently, relentless.

I saw Dylan walk out of the
hallway by the pool tables with another blonde and in a flash my stomach
turned.
Shit!
It was the girl I walked home that night with Trig! The
one who stripped for me and I’d left half naked in her living room!

I wanted to sprint from the
building immediately, but my muscles were rendered utterly useless after the
rush of adrenaline passed through my legs upon realizing my newest nightmare
was walking up to me, wrapped in a scantly dressed bow. Dylan was reaching up
to kiss Jason on the neck, while straightening the strap on one of her shoes
when she looked me in the eyes to introduce me to her friend. “Fuck!” I
thought; I didn’t know what to do.

The girl locked eyes with me
right away, recognition washing over her. “Reed!” she squealed. Uhg, suddenly
that near-mistake seems like a cliff-edge I had almost dove from. She reached
up, and kissed my cheek as if we were familiar. Though, I suppose sadly, in some
ways we were.

“Uh…yeah, hi,” I smiled softly,
trying to find a balance between retreat and polite. Sean was sliding away from
me now, to go join Trig, escaping my personal hell and sensing that things were
about to go very far south.

“Oh my God! You two know each
other?” Dylan said, looking between me, and my mistake.

“Well…sort of. I…uh,” I
scratched at my head and turned sideways to find Nolan’s eyes locked right on
me while she danced with the cowboy.
Damn it!

I smiled politely and turned
back to Dylan again. “I’m sorry?” I said, my train of thought completely
derailed.

“I said, you two know each
other?” Dylan was clearly thrown by my reaction now.

“Oh, yeah. I walked her…” I
paused realizing I didn’t even know her name. In my head, I called her Peaches,
because of the scent of her hair. “…home the other day.”

Dylan must have been familiar
with the story, because I caught a slight flinch in her face as she nodded and
smiled a little. “Ohhhhh, I see,” she smirked before looking back at Peaches.

Not knowing what to do, I did
the only thing I could think of doing to get us away from Dylan and her
judgmental gaze. “Hey, wanna dance?” I said, holding out an arm. Peaches slid
right up to me and took my arm as we walked out on the same floor that Nolan was
on, now nestled into some boot-wearing idiot for a romantic slow dance. If I
survive the night without punching someone, it would be a miracle.

I started dancing with Peaches,
and she looked up at me, her face both hopeful and indignant. “So,” she said, biting
her lip. A few weeks ago, I might have given in to a second chance with her,
but armed with my new knowledge, that there was no Gavin—never was…?
Well, Peaches didn’t have a chance.

“So,” I said, not really even
looking at her.

“I’m Jenny, by the way. In case
you were wondering,” she said, a complete attitude coming to the surface now. I
spun her around once in a twirl, mostly to get her out of my grasp and gain
some space between us. Unfortunately, though, she giggled when I did this,
drawing Nolan’s attention. And the flash of hurt on her face was unmistakable.

“Nice to meet you…again, Jenny,”
I said, pulling her back in so her head was out of my line of vision. I watched
Nolan walk back over to the pool tables with her cowboy and a few of his friends.
At least no one would touch her while she was playing pool.

“You know, I’m not usually easy
like that,” Jenny said. I just nodded and smiled, still trying to keep an eye
on Nolan, and my chest tightening as I watched her down three shots from a tray
with her cowboy friends.

“I’m sorry…how do you know
Dylan?” I said, fighting to put conversation out there that I didn’t have to
work at.

“Oh, she’s my cousin,” she said
quickly.

Shit! This just keeps getting
worse. I just swallowed in response to this new information. My muscles tensed,
and I became even more careful than I had been with this dangerous girl.

“Oh, I had no idea,” I shrugged
tightly.

She must have sensed my distance
and hesitation, because she sighed heavily and then rolled her eyes, spinning
herself from my arms and back again. “It’s okay, Reed. I knew who you were. And
I was totally just hitting on you that night, the entire time. My roommate and
I had it all planned,” she said, just curling one side of her mouth into a
guilty smile. “And you can relax. I didn’t tell my cousin about how I stripped
for you, and you bailed on me after I threw myself you. It’s not really one of
my finest moments.”

Relief washed over me, and my
feet felt like they had shed a little of the concrete that had been weighing
them down since I saw her walk from the bathroom. “She just knows that you
walked me home, and we sort of kissed but that you rejected me,” she continued.

Okay, we did sort of kiss. I
could live with this. And it wouldn’t make its way to Jason for him to twist
and use against me at some later date. I leaned back a bit and smiled at Jenny
genuinely now, the breath that I’d been holding finally exhaling. “Yeah, so…I’m
so sorry about all of that,” I admitted. “I wasn’t myself. I’ve been…dealing
with something.”

I was looking for Nolan again,
and Jenny followed my gaze, and then looked back at me to see the pain in my
eyes while Nolan laughed and brushed her hand along the shoulder of Mr. Cowboy.
“Ah, yeah…I see that,” she smiled with tight lips, soft and understanding. It
seems I’d underestimated both Dylan and Jenny.

“You wanna tell me about it?”
Jenny said, her head tilted a bit, and her shoulders rose like she was truly
interested in hearing my relationship problems. I considered it for a moment,
but then I saw Sarah’s stare right behind her, and heard her cough loudly just
to get our attention and force us to face her.

“Excuse me,” she said, just
cutting in and taking my hands.

I shrugged a little at Jenny,
and just mouthed, “I’m sorry,” as I gestured toward Sarah. Jenny just shook her
head and rolled her eyes, walking back to my brother and Dylan at the bar.

“Thanks,” I said to Sarah.

“Really? You’re thanking me?”
she said, a little confused.

“Yes. Yes, I am,” I smiled.
“That girl is a…well…she’s not a bad girl. Let’s just say, she was almost part
of a
reallllly big fuck-up
though.

Not quite ready to trust me,
Sarah just looked at me sideways, and continued our dance. “Ooooookay,” she
said, full of skepticism. “You can fill me in on that another time. Tonight,
though, well…we’ve got bigger problems.”

She turned me around quickly so
I could get a better look at Nolan—who was now sitting on her knees in
the middle of one of the pool tables, flirting with taking her shirt off, while
those pig-headed assholes stood around her hollering, and waiving dollar bills.

“Shit!” I said, quickly stepping
away from Sarah and sprinting over to the poolroom. I pushed through the seven
or eight guys who had gathered to watch Nolan’s little strip tease, and put my
knee up on the table to reach for Nolan’s hand. She recoiled at my touch right
away, though, whipping her hair back from her face and making eye contact with
me enough to show the hate in her eyes.