Gone From Me (21 page)

I watch the rest without feeling.

My dad struggles to reach my mother. He lies down beside her. Brushes some hair off her face. Places a hand on her hip.

A sob racks my body, breaking the silence. “Why?” I whisper.

Evan kneels down, pulls my forehead to his. “Because your mom and dad were cowards, that’s why.”

I spit in his face.

He falls back. “Bitch.” Behind the bar is a napkin, and he wipes his face. Then comes back over and slaps me so hard I see spots. “The simple answer is drugs. Your mom and dad were drug dealers, as were several officers and detectives in the police department. One of the IA pricks caught wind and started an investigation. Kyle’s dad was implicated and so was mine.” Evan slaps me again. “Your parents told them about Kyle’s dad. About my dad. They made a deal with the IA assholes. They intended to sing like the squawking canaries they were. My dad, Kyle’s dad couldn’t let that happen. So your parents were killed. The investigation was closed.”

“But my aunt and uncle? They never did anything.”
I don’t believe a word he’s saying.

Evan slaps me again. This time my lip cracks and blood
erupts from it. “The stupid fuckers thought they could blackmail Kyle’s dad, my dad. Sure we allowed them to think they got away with it. But we were just biding our time. Now that you’re eighteen, you have access to a safety deposit box. Try as we might we haven’t been able to find the key. That’s where you come in. That’s why you’re still alive. Because we need that key, Pudgy Mudgy.”

I’m in shock.
“A-A key?” I have no idea about the key he’s referring to. A shuddering breath torments my body. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Evan shakes his head. “I thought you might say that.” He presses some keys on his laptop, and the scene on the TV changes
again. It’s no longer the dead bodies of my parents, but of a cot in a small room. Lying on the cot is Kyle.

“You wouldn’t,” I breathe, unable to believe
what I’m seeing.

“Trust me, I don’t want to. I actually like the kid. But my father is desperate for that key. If you don’t tell me where it is, Kyle will die.
And haven’t enough people already died?”

I stare at the screen. Kyle isn’t moving. He’s
lying on his back. His chest rises and falls in a steady rhythm. He’s alive. I’m so grateful my shoulders sag. My breath comes out in a big puff. I didn’t even realize I’d been holding it.

That
still doesn’t change the fact that I don’t know where the key is. I rack my brain, trying to remember conversations my aunt and uncle had with me over the years. Something that might have been important but I didn’t realize it at the time.

There
is one thing my uncle says whenever our conversation turns serious. “Remember the Titans.” His catch phrase. Then he taps his nose. He’d done it right before I left the house tonight. At the realization that might’ve been the last time I see him or my aunt alive, my heart clenches. The phrase is something I thought was just one of his weird quirks—for two reasons. He owns a Titan truck, and “Remember the Titans” is his absolute favorite movie. At least that’s what he said. Now I wonder if maybe the key is in the DVD case or if it might be in his truck.

“So. What’s it going to be? Kyle’s death or the key?”

“You promise you won’t hurt Kyle if I give you that key?”

He
makes a tsk-tsk sound with his mouth. Slaps my face again. “Of course, Pudgy Mudgy. I’ve no desire to kill my cousin. Right now he probably thinks this is all some kind of joke. But it’s going to turn ugly fast if you don’t give me what I want.”

I nod.

“Where is it?”

I clear my throat. “I don’t know exactly. But…”

Evan sighs heavily. “Why did I have a feeling you were going to say that?” He pulls a cell phone from his pocket, presses a button, and holds it to his ear. “Kill—” He gasps. Turns away. “Mother fucker.” Evan kicks me and I cry out. “I’m on my way.” He grabs my hair. “Sit tight Pudgy. I’ll be back.” He walks behind me and I hear a door slam.

When I’m sure he’s gone, I twist my wrists,
trying to get my hands free. They don’t budge. I know they’ve been zip tied.

No escape
, I keep thinking. Trying to accept that fact, I close my eyes against the hot tears that won’t stop. I keep seeing my mom and dad get shot, and my aunt and uncle. It’s almost too much to take in. For so many years I wondered what happened. In two minutes I watched the events unfold. Kyle’s dad didn’t shoot them, but he was there. I struggle to believe it, to understand.

I start screaming. If I’m going to die like the rest of my family, then I’m going to die fighting.

I hear shouting outside the door.

“Evan, you sick asshole. Come back here and fight like a man.”

This is it
, I think.

Kyle

I open the door and look into the hallway. It’s so different from the
sterile room I’ve been in. It’s old, smells like a barn. There’s a sound like the repetitive dripping of water coming from somewhere in the building. But I don’t hear people—namely, Baldy and Ponytail.

Moving as quietly as I can, I walk down the hall and turn into a giant room
, like an airplane hangar. There are airplane parts scattered all over, laying on the floor, hanging out of wooden crates, and piled in a stack.

Beyond the parts is a smell, one I’m quite familiar with. Marijuana. Pot. Ganja. The college drug, at least that’s what Evan always called it. Whatever. It was nice to light up once in a while.

I’m wondering if Evan is dealing drugs, if that’s why he’s being creepy. But I don’t have time to figure it out. I need to find Evan and kick his stupid ass.

The small door is off to the left, and I run toward it. Turn the handle and burst into the cold, night air.

My skin prickles. I’m immediately freezing.

I need a phone. The street is empty. I’m about to go back in the warehouse, hoping
to find a phone in there when I see headlights.

“Yes,” I whisper, jumping down the stairs and moving to the middle of the street. I wave my hands over my head, hoping they’ll see me.

The car stops several feet away. It’s black. Kinda looks like a Beamer. At this point it could be a tractor and I’d be happy.

I run over. The driver’s side window goes down. “Hey—” I begin, and freeze. It’s Ms. Spears.
The English professor I TA for at the college. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Get i
n,” she commands.

I’m freezing my balls off. It’d be stupid not to get into her car, but after what occurred between us, I’m not sure I should.

“Don’t be an asshole.” She whips out a badge. I lean forward, really checking it out.

“FBI? Really? You expect me to buy that?” I can’t help the snort the leaves my throat.

A guy leans across her and holds a badge out for me to see. “This isn’t a game, son. Get in the damn car.”

Shock zings through my body. “Serious?”

Bitchy shakes her head. “Yes, you idiot.”

I climb in behind her. Buckle up.

The car jolts forward and the guy with black hair turns to face me. “My name is agent Harris. I’ve been with the FBI for fifteen years, and am agent Smythe’s partner.”

“Agent
Smythe?” I interrupt.

He points at Bitchy. She raises a hand, and waves. “
Hellooooo.”

“So, tell me, Kyle. What do you know about
your uncle and aunt?”

“Um
.” I’m not sure what to say. They’re family. I care about them. I know my aunt is constantly hanging out with her friends at the country club. My uncle is constantly gone, dealing with his restaurant. They’re busy. But they’re all I have. “My uncle owns an Italian restaurant. My aunt likes to hang out at the country club.” I stop, clamp my mouth shut. What do they want me to say?

Agent Harris nods.
“That’s true. To an extent. We believe your uncle is the leader of a mafia-style drug ring that has its tentacles in the Bellam Springs Police Department. We believe your father worked for him, and he did something to go against the family, which is why he was executed. We also believe that the girl you’ve been dating, Maddelena Martin?” He paused, as though waiting for me to confirm.

“Yes,
I know her.”

“Her father
came into information about your father and your uncle that would implicate them. But, as you know, he and her mother were killed. And the information wasn’t recovered.”

A bead of fear is forming in my gut, and is growing. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because Maddie is in trouble. We had eyes on her, but she’s gone and we aren’t sure where she is. We’ve been checking all of the known locations your uncle has used over the years, but we’ve come up empty handed.”

“She’s supposed to be staying with her aunt and uncle,” I say, trying to push down the terror building inside.

“We had a car there, but they were called away. It’s all very suspicious. We think they took your girlfriend. Any idea where Evan might have taken her?”

“This is bullshit. Evan wouldn’t do something like that. Let me call him.”

Agent Harris hands me a phone. “By all means.”

I quickly dial Evan’s number, but it goes to his voicemail. After the bee
p, I yell into the phone, “What’s going on?” I press End and hand the phone back.

“Any ideas?” Agent
Smythe asks.

There’s a house Evan’s family owns that’s been sitting empty for years. Evan and I use it to party once in a while. It’s the only place I can think of. “I have one.”

Maddie

There are gunshots and yelling somewhere above and behind me. I’m wondering who else Evan is hurting. Grateful that Kyle isn’t here.

The door behind me bursts open
, whipping my hair in my face.

“Clear.”

“Clear.”

“Check the prisoner.”

“Maddie! Freckles! Let me get by.” A familiar voice.

A sob escapes my throat. It’s Kyle. I’m relieved, and frightened, and sad, and horrified, and just plain worn out. Because it feels like everything in my life has been leading up to this moment. I was a pawn in a very twisted, very real chess game, and luckily
—or not so luckily—I didn’t die. But everyone else did. My mom and dad. My aunt and uncle.

Tears leak onto my face. Deep, heaving sobs escape my body. “Kyle. I-My…” I can’t find the words to tell him everything that’s happened.
How my heart is broken. That I’m relieved he’s okay.

Kyle

Seeing Maddie’s body tied to the chair, her face bruised and bloodied. It’s all I can do not to kill Evan. Once she’s untied, I lay her on the floor and rest her head in my lap. “She needs an ambulance,” I shout at no one in particular.

“We’ve called for one,” Agent Smythe says.

“Thank you.” I nod, and then return my focus to Maddie. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”

She swallows; I can hear it. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”

I shake my head. Tears line my lashes, and I clear my throat. Forcing myself to be strong for her. “You aren’t fine. And it’s my fault. I should’ve known.” That’s what it boils down to.
How could I be such a fool? How did I not know what was going on with my family? I consider myself a man of the world. It turns out I don’t know shit. Except that I’ll do whatever it takes to keep Maddie happy and safe.

My biggest concern?
Did my father really kill her parents? And if he did, how could she ever love me? If the tables were turned, I might not be so understanding. “Can you ever forgive me?”

“Kyle, I love you.” She takes my face between her hands. “You. The man you are. Not your father. Not your family. But you.” Her voice is tender, and I can’t hold back the tears any longer.

“I love you too.” 

35

Maddie

Remember the
Titans

I find myself in an interrogation room. My psychologist, Abigail
, is here, as is another psychologist from the FBI. His name is Mr. Turner. Bitchy Spears is there too. Turns out she isn’t an English professor, but is in fact an agent for the FBI. Placed undercover four years ago, when Evan started school at the University of Bellam Springs. She’s been the agent in charge since my parents died all those years ago.

I give her my statement.

“Do you know where we can find this key?” she asks.

I squeeze my hands together. “It might be somewhere in my uncle’s truck or in the DVD case for
Remember the Titans
.”

She raises her eyebrows. “Why do you say that?”

“It’s just a guess. My uncle used to say it a lot at seemingly random times.” I shrug. “Other than that, I have no idea where else to look.”

“Let’s go check it out.”

“First, can you tell me about Kyle? I want to make sure he’s alright.” They took him away in handcuffs. Told me it was just protocol, and that they would release him as soon as they were done questioning him. I know he’s innocent, but I’m worried about where his mind is going. I told him it wasn’t his father who killed my parents, that it was actually his uncle. The news didn’t seem to lift his spirits any.

“Kyle is fine,” Bitchy Spears says. Her real name is
Smythe. She’ll always be Bitchy to me. “He hasn’t done anything wrong… surprisingly.” She grunts. “He certainly had plenty of chances.”

We pull up in front of my aunt and uncle’s house. It’s a blue two story with black shutters. The ache in my heart increases. Agent Spears pulls the tape off the front and I unlock the door.

Everything looks the same.
Clean. Modern. White walls. Large bone tile in the entryway. A grouping of mirrors over a sleek black entry table. I turn right to head toward the kitchen. Green apples, lemons and limes are in a black wire basket sitting atop the granite island. Clorox stings my nose. Like someone just cleaned.

I move to the garage door. Open it. Flip on the light. Uncle John’s black Titan looms large in its normal spot. Someone push
es the button to open the garage, letting in the bright light from outside.

It’s midday.

Abigail moves to stand next to me. She squeezes my arm, letting me know she’s there if I need her. I really appreciate it. Having her near has brought more comfort than I could’ve imagined.

“Search everything,” Bitchy says.

I stand back. Watch them rip through the truck like it’s a present on Christmas morning. One of the agents shouts, “Got something.”

The key turns out to belong to a safety deposit box at the Titan Federal Savings Bank. Inside are all sorts of incriminating information, tapes, and papers. Stuff that proves Kyle’s dad, Evan’s dad, and even my parents were part of a huge drug ring. In fact the FBI uncovers what turns out to be the largest police
-related drug ring ever exposed in the United States.

More than a million pounds of drugs are confiscated. Evan, his father, and twenty other employees of the Bellam Springs
Police Department are arrested over the next several weeks. 

It makes me sad.

Agent Bitchy and her partner drive Abigail and me back to their offices. I stare out the window, watching the houses, the trees, and the old buildings rush by. We’re in the old part of town, made to look like the Wild West. The fronts of the buildings are facades. I realize that’s how I feel about my parents. Everything I thought I knew about them was false. I can’t help but feel like my parents have died all over again. But it’s a different kind of death. I had this preconceived notion about what kind of people they were. They raised me to have values, to be good, do what’s right.

“How you holding up?” Abigail asks, patting my thigh.

I shrug, unable to look at her. Because words are too complicated right now.

“Your mom and dad were more than parents. They were people as well. And people make mistakes. That doesn’t mean the good memories you have of them should feel false. They’re real.
They loved you. Hold on to that, and realize that in the end they tried to do the right thing.”

I nod, amazed how well this woman knows me. It makes me think that maybe she should talk to Kyle. He might need to hear some of the same things. I can’t even imagine how painful this must be for him
, knowing his dad, his uncle, his cousin, and probably his aunt were part of this.

“I feel betrayed,” I blurt out, pressing my head against the cold glass. And realize that’s probably how Kyle feels as well.

“It’s understandable, Maddie.”

S
he leaves it at that and removes her hand from my thigh. I look at her. She gazes out the window, just as I’d been doing. I see sadness in her features, and for the first time wonder what kind of a life she lives. Does she have a husband? Children? We never talk about her.

I catch Bitchy regarding me in the rear view mirror and turn away. Her eyes look understanding, sympathetic, and I don’t like it. It doesn’t suit her. I prefer her bitchiness.

Kyle

The FBI questions me for hours until I decide I could fall asleep standing. My uncle and Evan are in custody, and that’s good because if I ever seen Evan again I’ll kill him.

What he did to Maddie is inexcusable. What he and my uncle have been doing behind my back is the worst kind of treachery. Even though I’m glad I didn’t know, I feel like I should have. Reliving the past, I think deep down I knew something was off, but I wanted to believe so damn bad that my dad wasn’t what people said. Turns out he was nothing more than a pawn in a scheme that has tentacles throughout the state.

At least my dad didn’t pull the trigger and kill Maddie’s parents. But he was there, which is unforgiveable. 

I hope Maddie does forgive me though
, because she’s all I’ve got left.