Grasping at Eternity (The Kindrily) (31 page)

I looked at Faith. “That book you gave me about Edgar Cayce, it mentioned the Akashic records.”

Faith giggled and pointed at Edgar.

“Holy crap.” My head fell into my hands. I recalled my thoughts about suicide and how I hated Nathan. I thought of all the lies I’d ever told and the bad things I’d done. I mumbled into my palms. “Have you read my thoughts?”

Edgar waited for me to look up. “Maryah, my dear, I do not play judge or juror. I only wield my power with fellow members when it is critical to our wellbeing. Besides, I assure you, even if I had knowledge of every bad thought you had, it would pale in comparison to the iniquitous actions I have witnessed throughout my lives.”

I nodded, relieved that Edgar didn’t think I was an awful person, but made a mental note to be more conscious of my intentions and actions.
He
wasn’t a judge, but if a permanent record existed, I wanted to keep mine as clean as possible. A thought came to me. “Can you read your book and find out why I erased?”

He peered at me over his bifocals. “It doesn’t work that way. When you made that decision, you were in the Higher Realm. The Akashic Records document thoughts and intentions of the
human
mind. The Higher Realm and astral journeys are beyond my jurisdiction. It is believed by an elder of another kindrily that a collection referred to as the Sacred Scrolls records what transpires in the Higher Realm. However, we don’t know if the collection truly exists. No soul has been known to access it.”

“There are other kindrilies like us?”

Helen responded. “Yes, dear. Over six billion souls live on this planet. Many have abilities that would astound you.”

“Why is it such a secret?”

Much to my surprise Krista answered.

“The theory isn’t believed by the majority of the world. In the past, people have been killed or tortured for telling the truth about who they are. Many humans can’t comprehend ideas or theories that are bigger than them. If they can’t see it or understand it right away, they dismiss it. Some take it to an extreme and label it as evil or claim it’s demonic. It’s safer for us to stay quiet, at least until the world evolves enough to accept the possibility.”

Centuries-old souls and superpowers? Of course the majority of the world didn’t believe it. I sure as heck had trouble believing it.

I turned to Edgar. “Krista said Carson is the newest member. We arrived at different times?”

Edgar laid his hand on top of Helen’s. “Helen and I were born into the world during the first century. Four centuries later, fate allowed us to cross paths with Anthony and Louise. Another four centuries passed before Dylan and Amber joined.” My eyes progressed from couple to couple as Edgar explained. They were sitting in order of the timeline. “You and Nathaniel made the original eight in the twelfth century.”

I looked at Nathan’s chair beside me then at the other empty seat and five members to my right. “The original eight?”

“Six centuries passed before another synchronistic meeting occurred. For a short time we assumed it would be only the eight of us. However, the pattern picked up again in the eighteenth century with Harmony and her soul mate, Gregory. That same century Faith and Shiloh entered, then Krista—well, perhaps she should explain her own history.”

Krista started in a wispy voice. “Three lifetimes ago, I was born in Egypt to psychically gifted parents, but they were killed when I was fourteen. My little sister and I were shipped off to an orphanage in England where you worked as a nurse. My sister got hurt, and you saw me heal her. After that, you and Nathan adopted us.”

I couldn’t blink. “What?”
 

Krista stretched her hands in front of her like she wanted to reach across the table. “You taught my sister and me about the system, and about Elements. Everyone thought you were crazy, but you believed in us. You loved us wholeheartedly, and you said you
knew
we were meant to be in your kindrily.”

“And I was right? You chose how to come back?”

“No.” Krista looked at her twiddling thumbs. “I lived to be thirty-nine. When I crossed over, I wasn’t an Element—but you had made me a promise. In my first life, you told me when I died, if I wasn’t an Element, but I chose to retain, you would find me. So I retained. I was born to awful, abusive parents, but you kept your promise.” She raised her eyes to meet mine and tears were forming. “You came for me. You found me, just like you said you would, and you took me away from them.” She sniffled quietly. “That was my previous life. I was forty-nine when I died at Dylan and Amber’s wedding, but when I arrived at the Higher Realm again, things were different. I was an Element. I got to choose when and where I’d return just like you suspected.”

Faith rose and sat in the empty seat next to me, taking my hand. “You beat the system,” she said softly. “You believed it was possible when all of us told you it wasn’t. You believed so deeply that you made it real. This time Krista is one of us by divine right. You’re a superhero in our eyes.”

“But—I’m not,” I retorted through a choked voice. “I’m—plain and average.”

“Maryah, you are our eighth member,” Amber said. “Eight is a symbol for infinity. Your position represents the infinite source more than any of us. We think we’ve only begun to see what powers you possess.”

I couldn’t have done the things they were talking about. Adopting Krista? That made no sense at all. Not to mention it creeped me out. She was my cousin and best friend!

A tornado blew through my brain. One strong gust of wind blew Krista’s earlier words back at me.

“Kris, you mentioned you had a sister. What happened to her?”

Krista lit up. “She’s still alive. She’s ninety-nine and lives on an island between Ireland and England—Isle of Man. Her name is Sheila.”

I let go of Faith’s hand and gripped the sides of my chair. If what they were telling me was true, then I had an adopted daughter from a previous life who was still alive. It was impossible.

“She’s coming here for a visit soon,” Edgar said.

I felt like someone was holding my head underwater. Breathing became impossible. Did they expect me to accept that we lived like secret comic book characters? To act like it was no big deal?

“I have to go,” I mumbled, pushing back my chair.

“Go where?” Faith asked.

Good question. Where could I go? April wouldn’t speak to me. River was the only one who wasn’t a part of this. He was my only remaining connection to the normal world. “I have plans with River.”

The front door seemed a million miles away. My legs felt like wet noodles. Edgar called my name, but I kept walking, hoping that Time Freezer and Speed Demon had brought my car back to the house.

As I passed through the gate, I saw the Desoto. I ran to it and climbed inside, but there were no keys.

“No,” I moaned. “Get me away from here.”

 
“Maryah,” Carson shouted, blurring past my window. The passenger door opened and he was beside me before I could blink. “We won’t try to stop you. We understand how overwhelming this is. But please don’t tell anyone about us. You’re one of us and look how you’re reacting. Imagine if you told this stuff to a normal person.”

A head nod was my only reply.

He placed my key in the ignition, and the engine roared to life. “Call us if you need anything. We’re here for you no matter what. Forever.”

Maryah

Eightball barked and howled while I rang River’s doorbell for the second time. I didn’t call to tell him I was coming, so the look of surprise on his face when he answered the door seemed normal.

“Maryah, I didn’t know you were stopping by.”

Eightball waddled out onto the porch. His nubby tail wagged as I picked him up and hugged him for warmth.

“I needed to get out of the house.” I eyed the tattoos all over River’s bare chest and arms. I’d never seen him with his shirt off before.

“Give me a second.” He shut the door and I stood on the porch feeling stupid. I forgot my coat and I was shivering. Why didn’t he invite me in?

A few minutes later, the door opened and a girl with auburn hair shouldered past me without even glancing in my direction. She had to be in her mid-twenties and dressed like someone in a porno version of
The Matrix
. She climbed into a black Mercedes and drove away.

“Did I interrupt something?” I asked.

River stood in the doorway pulling a shirt over his head. His lips lifted in a cockeyed smile, and he wrapped his arms around my waist. “Friend of my uncle’s. She got wasted last night and had to crash here.”

“Eww, you smell like you bathed in beer!” I wriggled out of his arms. The scent of Jasmine and sweat lingered on him.

“You coming in?”

Against my better judgment, I nodded and went inside. I had nowhere else to go, and no one else to turn to—at least no one normal.

“You’re still drunk, aren’t you?” I set Eightball down on the floor. Beer bottles and shot glasses covered the coffee table.

River didn’t answer me. “So what’s up? You never show up here without calling.”

“Sorry to ruin your party with Little Red Riding Whore.”

“Hey, watch it.” River pointed the neck of a beer bottle at me. “She’s like family.”

“Then why do you smell like her?” I mumbled under my breath.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

Apparently the keeper of my secrets was keeping secrets of his own. I collapsed into the leather easy chair and ran my hands over my face. I came here to escape weirdness, but instead I stumbled into a scene from a sleazy soap opera. Part of me wanted to ask him if he slept with her, but another part didn’t care. April was better off without him. Eightball jumped into my lap and snorted while I rubbed his ears.

“Where’s your uncle?”

“Out.” River hovered above me. “You look like you pulled an all-nighter too. What’s wrong?”

Oh, let’s see. Everyone swears Nathan is my soul mate, that we’ve known each other for a bunch of lifetimes, that we all have superpowers, and that some old lady is my adopted daughter.
That’s what ran through my mind. What came out of my mouth was, “I haven’t slept much.”

River sat on the couch across from me. He didn’t take his gaze away from the collage of TV shows as he flipped through channels.

I didn’t know what to do with my hands. I kept squeezing my fingers and picking at my nails until I finally shoved them between my legs and half-whispered, “I’m freaked out.”

His eyes drifted sideways to meet mine. “What?”

“Some strange stuff has happened in the last day or two.”

He pressed mute and set the remote down. “Do tell.”

I took a deep breath, thinking about Carson’s warning not to tell anyone. “You have to
promise
you won’t say anything to anyone. I’m serious. The Lunas could be sent to an asylum if this got out.”

He raised his hand. “Swear.”

I leaned forward. Forget dragonflies, my stomach was filled with fire breathing dragons. I wouldn’t tell him everything, just enough to make me feel a little better. “They said we were family in previous lives, like, reincarnated.” I sat up straight, debating how much to tell him. “They said they remember their past lives.”

His face didn’t flinch. “Do you believe in that stuff? Past lives, or whatever.”

“I don’t know.”

“I don’t see the big deal. Lots of people in this town believe in some wacky stuff.”

“They want me to remember my past lives too.”

He grabbed a half empty beer from the table. “If you’re so freaked out, move in here with me. You’re eighteen now. You’re free to do what you want.”

The thought of deserting them never occurred to me. I needed a break from the flood of new revelations, but leaving them wasn’t an option. I didn’t know why, but just the idea of it felt wrong in so many ways. “I still love them. I mean, family doesn’t have to believe in all the same things.”

River squatted down in front of me. Eightball jumped off my lap. “They aren’t your family. You don’t share one drop of blood with any of them. You don’t have to live with them. There’s plenty of room of here, and I’ll take care of you. You’ll be spoiled rotten.”

He pulled me so close our faces almost touched. His lips pressed against mine.

 
“What are you doing?” I pushed him backward and he fell against the coffee table. Empty beer bottles and glasses crashed and rolled around us. Wiping the taste of beer from my lips, I gagged on the bile burning my throat. “I need a friend, and instead, you’re trying to kiss me! I’m not some skank like the girl who just left.”

He stood up, kicking bottles away from him. “What the hell? I plan a big night for your birthday and you cancel on me. Then you come running to me because those people you live with are mental patients. Now you’re shoving me around and accusing me of cheating on you? I don’t get you.”

Cheating on me? How could he cheat on me if I never agreed to be his girlfriend? “River, I’m sorry I pushed you, but I told you a dozen times, I don’t want to mess up our friendship.”

He shook his head then turned his back to me. What else could I say to make it clear to him? Were all guys so stubborn? I really did care about him, just not in the way he wanted. After a minute of uncomfortable silence he sat beside me and let out a deep breath. “You look exhausted. Want to lie down for a while?”

I nodded, wanting nothing more than to sleep and hopefully not dream—or astral travel.

We went to River’s room, but when he climbed into his bed, I just stood at his door.

“Let me guess,” he said. “We’re not allowed to sleep in the same bed.”

“It’s fine. I can sleep on the sofa.”

He sighed and rolled off the bed. “No. You sleep here. I’ll crash on the couch.”

“Sorry, but thank you.” He slipped his hand under the bottom of my shirt, but I pressed my forearm against my stomach to block him. “River, forget it. It’s never going to happen.”

“I’m just trying to make you feel better, to be here for you and help take your mind off things.”

“All I’ll ever need from you is friendship.”