Authors: Keisha Ervin
“Gunz,” she moaned as her body ached for more. In the pit of her stomach she knew he was giving her just enough string to hold on, but the cream lava that was building in her pussy was too hard to ignore.
With fire in his eyes, Gunz made his way up top. His dick was rock solid and throbbing to be licked. Gray, without hesitation, took a hold of him and led him up to her mouth. This shit was crazy.
Gray knew deep down inside that she should give up and let go. Destruction was ahead. She could see it a mile away. If she held on, he was sure to make her cry. Lonely nights, forgotten promises, and lies would all be thrown her way, and in some way it would all be her fault because she should've walked away. Gray wished she was strong enough to tell him to bounce, but the enthralling kisses he placed on the base of her neck dulled any common sense she thought she had. Pain shouldn't feel so good. She felt weak and cared for at the same time. Something had to give.
T
ransformer . . .
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Gnarls Barkly, “Transformer”
E
stelle's hit song “American Boy” bumped throughout Gray's house as she finished putting the final touches on the décor in her dining room. The space looked beautiful and chic, just like she'd hoped. A stark grey silk organza with pearl-studded patches covered her wooden table. In the middle was a beaded mesh runner. On top of the runner were four silver vases filled with Sarah Bernhardt peonies and sweet pea, which gave the décor an almost angelic look. Glass candle holders and candlesticks of various sizes lined the runner as well. Streamlined stemware and flatware finished off the table.
The girls would be arriving at any second. Gray couldn't wait to see her friends. It had been a minute since they were all together. Gray stood in front of the full length mirror and did a quick assessment of her outfit. Girlfriend Saturdays meant you had to go all out. A pair of jeans and a T-shirt just wouldn't do. Gray looked stunning in a pale pink halter dress with a satin tie around the waist and a feathered bottom, designed by Vivian Westwood. The dress was on loan to her from the magazine. Two huge square bracelets graced her right wrist, while a pair of lavender sequin Miu Miu closed-toe heels completed the ensemble.
Her hair was pulled to the side in a bun. Just as Gray gave herself a wink and a smile, there was a buzz at the door. Only one person would show up thirty minutes early, and that was Heidi. Gray happily went over and buzzed her up.
“Heeeeeey.” Heidi air-kissed each of her cheeks. “You look cute. I brought some wine.”
“I see somebody's excited.”
“I am. Shit, I've been waiting all month to get away from Jerrod's ass.”
“You stupid.” Gray laughed.
“I'm for real. That muthafucka been gettin' on my last nerve.”
“What he do now?”
“I'll tell you as soon as everybody get here, 'cause this some shit that all the girls gon' need to hear.”
“Damn, is it that serious?” Gray walked toward the dining room.
“Yes.” Heidi entered in behind her. “Gray.”
“What?”
“You have outdone yourself. This room looks gorgeous.”
“Thanks. Here you go.” She handed Heidi a frozen cranberry martini.
“This shit is hot, but I'm afraid to drink it. What in the hell is this smoke shit rising from the glass?”
“Dry ice, fool.”
“Oh, I was about to say . . .” Heidi took a sip. “Now that's what I'm talkin' about! I'm 'bout to get fucked uuu-uup!”
“You are an idiot.” Gray laughed as someone else buzzed her loft. “Who is it?”
“Me, girl. Open up the goddamn door,” Kema joked through the intercom.
“I knew it was somebody that I forgot to leave off the guest list,” Gray replied, letting her up.
“Bitch, please. You know I'm the life of the party,” Kema announced once she got upstairs.
“I can't stand ya ol' tall, pretty ass.” Gray gave her a hug.
“Don't hate me because I'm beautiful. Hate me because I'm rich.”
“Here, girl, you got to try one of these.” Heidi handed Kema a drink.
“Damn, can I at least sit my purse down?”
“Ain't shit in there but a tube of lip gloss, some condoms, and KY Jelly.”
“You know me so well.” Kema smirked, winking her eye.
“Y'all are ignorant,” Gray chimed in.
“Who else is coming?”
“Tee-Tee.”
“I talked to that bitch early this morning and he said he wasn't coming.”
“Y'all know how he is,” Heidi reasoned. “His ass gon' come in here and make a big ol' dramatic grand entrance.”
“If he do, I'ma punch him in his damn face.” Kema devoured the last of her martini. “Give me another one of these.”
Just as Gray was about to fix Kema another drink, there was another buzz at the door. Without asking who it was, Gray buzzed the caller up. Once she opened the door, she found Tee-Tee posing like a Madam Tussaud wax figure.
“Tyra Mail!” He waved his hand in the air, coming through the door dressed head to toe in drag.
Gray was outdone. Teyana, aka Tee-Tee, aka Miss Tee If You Nasty, was a bona fide diva. He was six foot one and had a body any woman would die for. His skin was a flawless shade of sweet honey molasses. That day, he was dressed very old Hollywood. He rocked a golden blonde Beyoncé-inspired wig. Black eyeliner, which was wing-tipped on the end, gave his eyes a catlike effect. Bright ruby red lipstick finished off his face. His dress was the showstopper. It was a cream-colored halter dress that plunged to the middle of his stomach. A row of ruffles trimmed the neckline. The bottom of the dress fanned out like a fishtail.
“I know, darling.” He smiled. “I'm fierce.” He snapped his finger.
Everybody wanted to hate, but they couldn't. Tee-Tee had put every last one of them to sleep.
“Yo' ass always tryin' to outdo somebody.” Kema twisted up her lip.
“Bitter, bitch?” Tee-Tee questioned.
“You wish, and anyway, I thought you said yo' ass wasn't coming.”
“I know what I said. Why you all up in my business?” He flicked his hair to the back and sat down at the dining room table.
“Whateva.” Kema rolled her eyes toward the ceiling.
“Gray, have you talked to Truth since the funeral?” Heidi questioned.
“No, I've been meaning to call him.”
“Oh.”
“Listen up, ladies.” Gray clapped her hands together. “To start, we will be having crepes for appetizers. The main course will be mussels served over a bed of pasta that has been steamed in white wine with shallots and garlic, and for dessert, crème brûlée.”
“Sounds finger-lickin' good.” Tee-Tee licked his fingers with each word.
“You are so gross.” Heidi giggled.
“Like T.I. said, you can hate if you want to, but you'll just be wastin' ya time.”
“Since when you become a homo thug?” Heidi teased.
“Since ya man stopped taking baths.”
“Oh, no you didn't,” she shot up.
“What?” Gray asked, surprised, bringing in the crepes.
“I can't stand yo' big-mouth ass.”
“Hmm.” Tee-Tee crossed his legs then pointed his index finger toward Heidi. “Man down!”
“Heidi, what the fuck is he talkin' about? Jerrod over there not washin' his ass?” Gray continued.
“Girl, I don't know what the fuck is wrong wit' that nigga.” Heidi placed her face in her hands. “Like, I'm straight-up fuckin' wit' a D.B.”
“As big as you say Jerrod dick is, I know y'all still been fuckin', so he ain't too much of a Dirty Boy,” Tee-Tee instigated.
“For your information, trick, we haven't been having sex. I just started back giving his ass some last week 'cause I felt sorry for him. But what make it so bad, y'all, is that I have to run him a bath and sit on the side of the tub just to make sure he wash his ass.”
“Oh, hell no. That's too much muthafuckin' playin'.” Kema looked at Heidi as if she'd lost her mind.
“And he let you do that?” Gray asked, stunned.
“He so dumb. He didn't know what was going on. He thought I was tryin' to be romantic.”
“Wow.”
“Shit, if you did all of that, you might as well have washed in between his legs.” Kema chuckled.
“That's not a bad idea. My man like to get his asshole wet from time to time,” Tee-Tee confirmed.
“You just don't care what come out your mouth, do you?”
“No, boo, it's more about what I put in.”
“All right.” Gray's upper lip curled. “That's enough. Heidi, finish.”
“Okay, one time we had sex in the morning, right? After we finished, I took a bath. When I got out of the tub, this nigga had on his gym clothes and I'm lookin' at him like, you ain't gon' hit nothing? So I got past that. We went to the gym and worked out for an hour. He drove us home, and I swear to God, I almost fainted twice. I mean, it smelled like badussy, y'all. I had to make him wash my car as soon as we got home. Then I had to go in after him and wipe my seats down 'cause I could still smell his ripe-ass balls on the inside.”
“That's some funky shit.” Kema shook her head.
“Ummmmmmmm, ah.” Tee-Tee pursed his lips like an old lady in church and rocked back and forth.
“Hold up, but I ain't finished. After he washed my car, he cleaned up the house, went to bed, then got up, and went to the shop.”
“So he ain't take no bath?”
“No, that nigga didn't even wash up. Not a half bath, a bird bath, a ho bath, nooooooooooo bath.”
Gray had to hold her stomach she was laughing so hard.
“Then his ripe ass be having the nerve to come to me talkin' about he want some head. I be lookin' at him like, nigga, are you tryin' to kill me? You ain't even put a rag on that dick. No air freshner, no Febreze, no Air Wick, no Glade, no hand sanitizer, no nothing.”
“You better tell him to g'on somewhere with them organic, all nat-ur-al, no preservatives, low sodium, sugar-free-ass balls,” Tee-Tee joned.
“I swear y'all are a bunch of coons.” Gray continued to laugh. “So are you going to say something to him?”
“How do I go to a thirty-year-old man and tell him to wash his ass?”
“Nigga, get yo' nasty, musty, sweaty-balls-having ass in the goddamn tub!” Kema snapped, almost done with her second drink. “That's how you say it.”
“You stupid. I can't do that.”
“Well, then you like smelling his funky ass. Quit complaining.”
“Whateva.”
“Anyway, how are the crepes?”
“They're good, girl,” Heidi said, taking another.
“Yeah, girl, these things so good I wanna lather them all over my body,” Tee-Tee agreed.
“I am officially not talkin' to you anymore today.” Gray laughed on her way back into the kitchen.
“Uh-uh, Stormy Weather, I know you don't think you off the hook. What's been going on between you and Tommy Gunn?”
“His name is Gunz, ignorant ass.” Gray smiled, pushing him in the back.
“Shit, I thought his name was BB Gun.” Kema laughed.
“Fuck the both of you.” Gray gave them both the middle finger.
“Whateva. Spill the beans, bitch.”
“I don't know. It's hard to explain. It's like sometimes I know where he's coming from, then sometimes I don't. Like . . . I know he likes me, but this whole thing with him not wanting to be in a relationship is not gonna work for me too much longer.”
“Is it workin' for you now? From what you told me, you only see him every couple of weeks,” Kema countered.
“I mean, that has to be understood, though. You have to consider what he does for a living. He's the fuckin' leader of a major drug cartel.”
“Let me tell you something. When a man wanna spend time with you, he'll find a way, so all of that is a bunch of bullshit.”
“You're right.” Gray nodded her head.
“So his career choice doesn't bother you?” Heidi asked.
“I mean, of course it does, but it's not like I can just go to him and say âyou need to stop sellin' drugs.' It's like we both know what's going on, but we don't discuss it.”
“I mean, c'mon, let's be real. What is it about Gunz that's keeping you around besides the fact that he's fine and got dough?”
“What other reason she need? Hell, that's reason enough for me,” Tee-Tee remarked.
“Tee, you know how I am. I'm not the relationship type, but Gray is. That's all she's wanted for the past year, and you know how she fall into shit quick. I'm just tryin' to make sure her feelings don't get hurt, and dealing wit' a nigga like Gunz, her feelings are sure to get hurt. And guess what? We gon' be the ones left to pick up the pieces.”
“Well, damn, I'm glad to see y'all think I'm such a fuckin' weakling,” Gray spoke up for herself.
“It's not that, boo-boo. We just know how you are.” Heidi rubbed the back of her hand. “You're too fuckin' nice and people take that for granted.”
“Look, I know that Gunz is a handful, but at the end of the day, despite the bullshit, I know he cares for me.”
“Nobody said he didn't care for you. What we're sayin' is be careful. Don't put all of your eggs in one basket. If the man is tellin' you he doesn't want to be in a relationship, then it's for a reason, so listen to him. And I know sometimes we as women get caught up in the sweet words that they tell us, but like the old sayin' says, actions speak louder than words,” Kema stated, hoping Gray would take her advice.
“I feel you. Now, if you ladies will excuse me, I'm about to go get dinner.”
Gray stood at the kitchen counter and glared out the window. She could hear her friends in the other room, laughing and talking as if what they'd just said hadn't hurt her. It didn't matter, though. Kema, Heidi, and even Tee-Tee had somebody. Gray wasn't willing to be the single friend with no man anymore. She was at the point were she would rather have a piece of a man than no man at all. Gray had become accustomed to having someone to talk to and hold at night, and so what if Gunz didn't want a girlfriend?
He liked her, probably even loved her. If she stuck around and showed him how great a woman she was, he'd change his mind. There was no point in stopping now. Half the battle had already been won. With a little bit more persistence and finesse, Gray was sure to win the fight.
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Gray and Gunz sat quietly outside of Bar Louie in the Central West End. It was a scorching hot July afternoon. Gray's meal wasn't even appetizing to her anymore. The lemon chicken pasta she'd ordered looked like mush. The sight of it turned her stomach every time she took a look at it. Gray fanned herself with a black napkin. The sun beamed against her right thigh, making her feel hot and uncomfortable.