Healing Hark (Doms of Chicago) (3 page)

Smearing the softened butter over the lightly toasted bagel, he tugged his lower lip into his mouth. Without a word, he handed it to his master before moving on to spread cream cheese over his. When he finished, he shifted his weight and settled down on the pillow across from his Master. Nibbling on the edge of the bagel, he waited for him to speak.

After taking another long sip of his tea, Diachi set the cup down on the floor next to him. “You’ve been very patient, Bryan. The old Bryan would’ve demanded to know what was going on, or hired someone to find out for him. You’ve grown.”

Bryan wanted to hit something, even as the words of praise warmed his heart. He wasn’t the same insecure submissive who’d been burned by two of his previous masters. He’d grown under Master Rai’s care, but at the same time it didn’t mean he found the waiting comfortable. “Look, I know you’ll eventually tell me. But it doesn’t make the waiting any easier.”

Diachi stared at him. “I know.” He leaned forward to snag a piece of sliced fruit from the bowl. “Which is why I treasure your trust.” He popped the grapefruit into his mouth and chewed. “About a week ago while I was waiting for you, Olivia approached me at the club. She had a favor to ask of me — of us.”

Bryan nodded. “Okay. But what does that have to do with last night?”

Diachi chuckled. “Glad to see not all of your impatience is gone. I’m getting there. She wanted to know if I’d open up our home to a member of the club. A man who lost not only his entire family in an accident but his Dom as well. It seems he’s been struggling with the loss and is trying to isolate himself to the point it’s become harmful.”

Cocking his head, Bryan tried to interpret his words. “So she’s assuming having him stay with us will remind him of the good aspects of a D/s relationship?”

“Yes.” Diachi snagged another piece of fruit. “That’s the hope. To see if being around us will jar him out of his isolation and bring him back amongst the living. She started the process by having him help with security when Master Gabriel’s sub was under attack last year, but instead of taking the opportunity to rejoin society, he’s chosen to retreat once more. ”

Bryan sighed. “Not that I’m totally against it, but what made her think we’d be a perfect example? As a same sex couple we’re not out of the norm, but is this man gay as well? Won’t seeing us bring back bad memories of his Master?”

“That’s a risk.” Diachi picked up his cup. “It’s a difficult situation for sure.” He inhaled deeply, then looked up at Bryan, his expression carefully blank. “But the main reason she wants me to do it is because I used to be his Master. Which is why last night during our demonstration, I thought I felt his presence. It was just a tingling at the back of my neck, but one so familiar, I looked up, expecting to see him.”

Shock, trepidation, then fear washed over Bryan. Something inside of him froze, and he felt like he was skating on thin ice with it cracking beneath him.

As if reading his sub, Diachi crawled over to him. “Look at me,
hana.
This does
not
change things between us.”

“But…” He fumbled for the words to express what he was feeling.

The brush of fingers against his cheek before Diachi cupped his face between his palms had him whimpering. Diachi’s dark eyes held reassurance. “You knew I had submissives before you, just as I knew you had other Masters. None of it matters now though. We’re together.” His Master’s hands left his face to trail down his throat. He could feel the light touch of them against the collar he wore. “This is proof we belong together – always.”

Bryan sighed. “Yes, Master… but I…”

“…have concerns.” Diachi finished. “I understand. With your past, I’m not surprised. What your former Masters did was a crime.” He tipped Bryan’s chin up. “But have I ever broken my word to you?” When he shook his head, Diachi continued. “Yes, I loved Hark once upon a time. Years ago he was my first submissive and as such will always have a place in my heart.”

Bryan stiffened, dread filling him. Would his master leave him?

A sound of frustration filled the air before he found himself flat on his back under his master. “Don’t go there. I’m not going anywhere without you. However, this is something I want to do, to correct a wrong from many years ago.” Diachi’s tone hardened. “I was young and inexperienced when I met Harkahome. I made mistakes, and one of those drove him away from me. Now knowing I might be able to help him heal, do you think I should turn him away if he finds the courage to come to me?”

Chewing on his lower lip, Bryan shook his head. His master, if anything, was honorable. “You said ‘if,
’ Master.”

Diachi nodded. “Yes. This is all dependent on Hark choosing us over a cold, lonely motel room. I’d like to think he would, but Hark has never done anything the easy way. Even as a twenty something, he was stubborn, set in his ways. There’s always been a dark edge to him. One Olivia has told me has only gotten darker since his tragic loss. However, if this is going to cause us issues, I’ll call Olivia back and tell her it won’t work.”

Looping his arms around Diachi’s shoulders, Bryan sighed. “Does helping him mean that much to you?”

Diachi pressed his forehead to his. “Yes. It’ll give me a chance to correct a wrong. And even if it didn’t, I’d still want to help him. No submissive deserves to go through what he has.”

“Okay, Master. He can stay if he chooses. I’ll deal with it.”

Diachi shook his head. “No,
we’ll
deal with it. If you ever, for a second, doubt our bond, you’ll come to me, so I can put those fears to rest. Hark will be our guest, but you’ll always be my
hana.
I won’t risk what we have to heal him.”

Bryan’s heart leapt at the fierceness in his lover’s tone, feeling safe once more. That was his master, always sure of himself and Bryan’s place in his life.

Standing in the hallway between his and Gabriel's condos, Hark was torn. In his hand he held keys, but the temptation to knock on Gabriel's door was nearly overwhelming. He should go into his place despite his need to talk to someone about the opportunity Olivia presented. But should he drag one of his few friends outside the situation into it? Gabriel would understand better than anyone else how hard it was to move on after losing a partner.
But George was so much more than just my Dom. And Teresina was more than my submissive. We had a life together, even a son. They were my family
.

The matter was taken out of his hands when the door opened. Standing in the opening, tall and slender Zhenya grinned up at him. Her dark hair was pulled up into a lopsided ponytail at the top of her head.

“So are you going to stand out there all day, or you going to come in?”

A reluctant grin crossed his face. “Caught me again. So I guess I'm coming in.”

She laughed. “Yep, according to the rules, you can't scurry inside your condo and play the hermit crab if I catch you.”

He shook his head. “I can't believe I let you talk me into this.” He followed her into the condo.

“Gabriel’s in the kitchen.” She nodded toward it. “Why don’t you go see what he’s doing while I get Sophia up?”

“Okay.” The smells drifting from the kitchen made his stomach rumble. “Smells good in here, as usual. You’re a lucky lady. Teresina could burn water.”

She smiled at him. “I know I am.” A baby’s cry came from down the hallway. “Go see if you can give Master a hand. Maybe you can set the table for me?” she teased before disappearing down the long hall.

“Sure thing.” He tossed his leather jacket on the back of the couch before wandering into the kitchen. Gabriel, Teresina's older brother, was at the island
, busy chopping up some kind of green herb wearing a long apron that read: 'I'm master of the kitchen.' Hark watched as he turned and dumped a blade full of what was either parsley or oregano into a bubbling pot.

“Lost again, huh?” Gabriel glanced over his shoulder when he cleared his throat.

“Yeah.” He shoved his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “I swear that woman of yours has ears like an owl on her. Christ, I worked with guys in the service who’d be hard pressed to catch me with the ease she does.”

Gabriel chuckled. “It's called Mommy-radar, dude.” His gray eyes twinkled. “I swear she has eyes in the back of her head and an extra pair of ears. Sophia can't get away with anything.” He stirred the pot of sauce. “Probably a good thing too, since she started crawling. I swear she's into everything.”

Hark laughed. “I remember that age. Alex was lightning fast. More than once I saved his little ass from a serious tumble when he tried to climb out of his crib or down the steps.” His grin faded. “Damn I miss him. It’s hard to believe it’s been nearly three years since they died.”

Gabriel clapped a hand over his shoulder, squeezing it gently. “I understand. I miss them too. But life goes on and they’d want you to be happy. You can’t mourn forever.”

The tense moment was interrupted when Zhenya brought Sophia back down the hall. “Look who's up, Daddy.” The little girl cooed, looking delightfully rumpled with her tousled dark curls tumbling around pink cheeks. As usual, she smelled of baby powder and was all grins and drool. His heart leapt when she spotted him.

“Unca.” Her little pudgy hands reached for him as she squirmed to get free. “Unca.”

Stepping closer, he took her from her mother. “Hello, sweetheart. Did you have a good nap?” He pressed a kiss to her forehead.

She giggled, her little fingers reaching for the long braid that had fallen forward when he'd leaned in to take her from Zhenya. He hid his wince as she pulled on it, brushing the end against her cheeks. He chuckled
, lifting her high enough to set her on his shoulders. At ten months of age, she wasn't very heavy, but loved when he hoisted her high. Another round of giggles escaped her. “Unca, unca,” she chortled.

Going to her Master and lover, Zhenya wrapped her arms around Gabriel's waist. “I'm always surprised at how gentle he is with her.”

Gabriel pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Of course he is. Didn't you know he's a big old softie?”

Hark gave a mock growl and blew bubbles on Sophie’s belly as he swung her around to face him. She giggled and fisted his hair. “Don't you pay any attention to them, Sophie-mia. Just let the boys come around you with nefarious attentions and Uncle will set them straight.” She cooed at him as he attempted to free his hair from her little fists before she stuck the end of his braid in her mouth. “Got quite the grip there.”

“A big old softie who had a baby attached to his precious hair,” Gabriel retorted. “Want to wager on how long it takes him to liberate his braid?”

Zhenya seemed to contemplate the idea. “Hmmm, I say at least ten minutes, or one of us decides to rescue him.”

“You're not helping,” Hark grumbled, blowing more bubbles on the tiny girl’s belly. He could easily free his hair, but it was a game he played often with the little tyke. “Uncle needs that back. How else am I gonna ever find you another uncle or aunt?”

She laughed and tightened her grip on the braid, before drooling all over the hair tie securing the end of it. “Ew. Now that's not nice, little one. You're supposed to save all that for your daddy.”

Sophie chortled and turned to look at Gabriel. “Da-da.” She released Hark’s hair, and lifted her arms to be taken as Gabriel joined him.

“Come here, pumpkin. Want to help Daddy finish up the spaghetti
while Mommy and Uncle Hark set the table?”

Sophie grinned and stuck her fist in her mouth. Gabriel spoke softly as he carried the little girl around the counter. Hark watched as the other man effortlessly put the finishing touches on the meal while holding his daughter with ease.

“He's a good father.” Hark accepted the stack of plates Zhenya handed him.

“Yes, he is.” A soft look of love crossed her face. “A very good father.”

* * * *

“So what had you looking so perplexed in the hall?” Zhenya asked as they cleared the used dishes from the table. The meal as usual had been delicious and he and Zhenya were taking care of the cleanup while Gabriel was bathing the sauce-spotted little girl after letting her try to feed herself small pieces of spaghetti.

He scraped the leftovers into the garbage disposal. “I went to the club on Friday.”

Zhenya beamed at him. “Really? I can't believe it. You actually did it.”

He shrugged. “I thought I should give it an honest shot before writing it off.” He smirked at her. “So a certain mouthy submissive would get off my back.
”

She batted her eyes at him. “I wouldn't know who
you’re talking about.” She took the plate from him and placed it in the dishwasher. “So how did your night at the club go?”

“Hard. There were some female subs offering themselves to me. But I'm not ready to be a Dom for anyone right now.”

She nodded her understanding. “So what about being a submissive? Are you ready for that?”

He thought about the demonstration as he scraped another plate into the sink. “Perhaps, for the right man.” He shook his head. “I saw one of my former masters.”

“Really?” She slid another plate into the rack. “And how did that make you feel?”

He sighed. “Truthfully?”

She arched her brow and put a hand on her hip. “No, lie to me. I've always wanted a six foot six Indian to tell me a 'tall tale'.” She swatted at his arm. “Of course, I want you to give me the truth.”

He groaned. “
You’re incorrigible. I can't believe Gabriel hasn't bent you over and warmed your bottom more than once or twice for your smart mouth.”

She smiled. “What makes you think he hasn't?” She rinsed one of the wine glasses. “So spill it. What was it like to come in contact with your previous Dom?”

He reached for the bowl the salad had been served in. “I didn’t actually come in contact with him. He was whipping his current sub. He was demonstrating how to correctly use a single-tail. So I stood on the edge of the scene and watched.”

“Why?” She loaded the last dish before pointing to the cupboard under the sink. “Hand me the dishwasher soap, please.”

Opening the cupboard, he handed her the requested item. “Here.”

“So what stopped you from approaching him afterward?” She was like a dog with a bone.

“Olivia.” He took the bottle back from her after she poured some into the reservoir. “She dragged me back to her office.”

“Really?” She shot him a confused look as she shut the dishwasher and started it. “You weren't doing anything wrong, were you?”

“I got a little overwhelmed. Nearly lost control” His cheeks actually flushed. “It was more than I expected. It brought back memories of our past and I nearly approached him.”

“To jump him or kick his ass?” She leaned against the counter.

He braced himself on the edge of the sink. “I honestly don't know. Christ, Diachi Rai has always been my weak spot. He's the epitome of a panther. All sleek muscles and control. It drove me wild nearly twenty years ago when I first met him. And seeing him Friday night across the room, well, I was drawn to him. Like a moth to a flame. Sad, isn't it?”

She placed her hand on his arm. “No, it's not sad. Why would you think that? I've found men don't normally change what they find attractive. So it stands to reason you'll still be drawn to him.”

He gave her rueful smile. “Well, I was drawn. If it hadn't been for Olivia stopping me, I would've approached him and more than likely asked for a scene.” He sighed. “Do you realize how long it's been since I've lost myself in a scene? Found the peace in the embrace of leather, the sting of a whip?” He scrubbed his hands over his face. “Too long.”

Her expression softened and laid her hand on his arm. “Was it before they died?”

He nodded. “I miss it. And Lord knows I've tried.” He shifted. “Three times since their deaths, I've gone out. Not to Olivia’s, but a leather bar near downtown. I wanted a man who could manhandle me. Make me submit.”

“Make you submit? Dude, have you looked in the mirror lately?” Gabriel came back into the kitchen, his t-shirt damp in places, carrying a giggling, wiggling Sophia wrapped in a terrycloth hoodie. “You're a mountain. What fool in their right mind would take you on?”

Hark laughed. “You'd be surprised. It's usually the little scrappy guys. I got half a dozen offers to top some little twink each time.”

“But that didn't give you what you wanted.” Zhenya frowned.

He shook his head. “No. Made the twinks happy, but didn't fill the hole. May I?” He held his arms out to Sophia. Gabriel nodded and handed the little girl over. Hark inhaled the familiar baby-powder scent. It reminded him of the million times he'd done the same with George and Teresina's son. Teresina would bathe Alex and then give him to Hark to dress for bed. Every night it was the same routine until the little boy got to the age where he deemed himself too old to be dressed. Then it was Hark telling him stories as he got himself ready for bed.

“Here, might as well complete it.” Gabriel tossed the little pink footie pajamas to him. “Zhenya told me about how you used to do this with Alex, and I don't think little Miss Sophia will mind her uncle getting her ready for bed.”

Pain flared at the reference, but he pushed it down. What Gabriel said was true. He'd told Zhenya during their stay at his home after offering to help with Sophia's bath one night.

“Thanks.” He pressed a kiss to Sophia's nose. “No problem. Shall we get you dressed?” Sophia patted his cheek. He walked back into the living room. Gabriel and Zhenya trailed after him. Laying the little girl down on the couch, he chuckled as she immediately rolled over, her diaper
clad bottom in the air. “Whoa, not so fast, squirt.” Gently rolling her back over, he picked up the conversation. “Thankfully, Olivia dragged me into her office before I could make a total fool of myself. It was as if no time had passed. I was ready to offer myself to him. Even knowing he was in a demonstration with another submissive.”

“Whoa....back up. What did I miss?” Gabriel held up his hands. “I take it you went to the club?”

He nodded, opening the pajamas up and positioning Sophia on them. “Yeah, on Friday night.”

“And he saw one of his previous masters doing a demonstration.” Zhenya settled on the arm of the chair.

Gabriel's nodded. “Okay, so Olivia dragged you out of there?”

“Yeah...” He slipped Sophia's arms into the sleeper. “And told me I was going to be homeless for about a month while she had renovations done on the condo. So I have a choice. Either some swanky hotel until they were done, or to stay with a friend of hers.”

“Who?”

He stuffed Sophia's legs into the sleeper, then quickly snapped it shut. “Master Rai.”

Zhenya gasped and Gabriel leaned forward.

“Rai?” Gabriel seemed intrigued. “He's a great guy. I've had him in several shibari classes. He dotes on his sub, Bryan. They've been together for several years now. Olivia couldn't have chosen a better couple to have you stay with.”