Hearsay (24 page)

"All he does is eat and laze about." Derrick closed the door, set his keys, cell phone, and wallet on the small entryway console. He took Roman's keys and phone from his hand and placed them next to his own before scooping up his cat. "He won't attack you. I don't usually have visitors, so he acts suspicious of everyone. I think he has a split personality problem. Sometimes he's a cat, other times he behaves like a guard dog. But, anyhow… let me put him away. He likes attention when I get home…" Derrick smiled nervously and cleared his throat. "He wouldn't leave us alone to talk."

When Derrick walked away, Roman rested his head against the door and closed his eyes. After taking several deep breaths he removed his glasses and set them on the console blindly.

Derrick's steps on the wood floor as he moved around his apartment matched the thumping in Roman's heart. There was a squeaky sound as a door opened and closed. Another door closed with a softer click a few seconds later. A toilet was flushed. Water ran in the bathroom sink.
 

Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

"Would you like something to drink?"

Roman shook his head and opened his eyes slowly. When he extended his hand, Derrick took it immediately and stepped closer to him. Toe to toe. Chest to chest.

Roman pressed his lips to Derrick's temple. Nuzzled his ear, stroked his back and the nape of his neck. He placed his lips over Derrick's and simply breathed him in. Roman started growing hard just from holding him like this.

"Shouldn't we just get our talk out of the way first?" Derrick asked against his lips, pushing Roman's tux jacket off his shoulders.

"Maybe," Roman whispered.
 

No way!
His mind protested.

Roman let his jacket fall to the floor. Derrick's followed suit.

"So why don't we?" Derrick asked, sounding less adamant about having this talk tonight than he had earlier at the hotel.

Roman liked that. Not because he wanted to avoid the conversation for the time being—which he did—but because Derrick's willingness to wait meant he wanted Roman as much as Roman wanted him. That, at the moment, touching each other was the priority.

Roman had been so worried in the past year, so angry, that he hadn't realized how much he'd missed being intimate with another man. To take charge and get him where Roman wanted him... to use his fingers and mouth to drive
Derrick
out of his mind. It had to be Derrick getting off and feeling good. A random body wouldn't do.

And maybe, just maybe, Derrick would want to do the same to him.
 

Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

"We can't talk right now because I haven't been with anyone in a long time…" He combed his fingers through Derrick's hair and brushed his mouth with a light kiss. "And I can't think straight when I'm so hard."

Derrick moaned and claimed his mouth. He ran his hands over Roman's chest, got rid of his bow tie, made quick work of the buttons, and slid his fingers under Roman's shirt.

At first his touch was gentle… almost reverent, as if he couldn't believe they really were doing this. But then he got bolder and assertive, as if he was determined to show Roman why they should be doing this every night.

Derrick's fingertips moved slowly over Roman's throat, his chest, his quivering stomach, and his waist. His kisses were… Jesus… they were
something.
Roman was just too damn high from lust to think of a word.

Roman let out something that sounded suspiciously like a whimper when Derrick's fingers made the return trip up his chest and paused over the nipples.

"I always knew you'd have some fur," Derrick half-said, half-moaned. "It matches that wolfish behavior you sometimes display in the courtroom. So damn sexy… it gets me hard every time."

"Wolfish?" Roman repeated in an attempt to disguise his surprise. He had never seen Derrick in the courtroom when he was trying a case. That Derrick had showed up just to see Roman from afar warmed his heart.

"You're my big, bad wolf..." Derrick pinched one of his nipples and licked his own lips. "And I know you'll eat me better than anyone else could."

Roman flipped their positions, slammed Derrick against the door, and quickly gripped his head with one hand and snuck the other hand between their bodies. He insinuated a knee between Derrick's legs. Their kisses went from exploring to ravenous as he undressed Derrick from the waist up and got rid of his own shirt. Roman thought he'd cum on the spot when he pressed his chest to Derrick's and felt his bare, smooth skin.

Conducting himself like the smooth, patient lover he'd been for the majority of his life was impossible after that. He'd wanted Derrick too damn much and for too fucking long to be able to hold back. Plus, the blasted clock in his mind kept ticking away the minutes he had left with his boyfriend of likely just one night.

Roman had to feel as much as he could.

He had to touch Derrick. He had to taste him. It was imperative for Roman to give him some measure of sexual pleasure at least one time. He had to make it count, because, once this desperate, primitive urge to be together intimately was taken care of, Derrick would want to talk. And, if by the end of that conversation Roman had to walk away, he would.

He licked a path down the column of Derrick's neck to his hairless chest. He was perfect. The size, texture, and skin color drove Roman crazy. There were no bulging muscles, but Derrick's shoulders, arms, and pecs were beautifully defined, as were his abs.

Roman lowered his head and took a taut, brown nipple between his lips. He licked, sucked, and bit, spurred on by all the noises Derrick made and loving that he reacted to Roman's touch with total abandon. He moaned and groaned. He begged. He rubbed his balls and cock against Roman's leg.

It was beautiful.

"What I'm about to say is horribly embarrassing for me, but meant as a compliment to you," Derrick slurred, grabbing Roman's ass with both hands. "There's a chance I might cum before you even unzip my pants."

"Don't you dare," Roman ordered, kissing Derrick again. "That load belongs in my mouth."

Derrick gasped and snapped his eyes open. "I love your naughty, dirty-talking side," he said in a rough voice. "Peeling off the layers you've kept hidden under your suits is going to be amazing."

Or not…
 

Roman shook his head and focused on Derrick. His cheekbones were flushed, his nostrils flared, and his lips parted. But his eyes… wow. They were so bright and glazed over, they made Derrick look slightly delirious. It was a thing of beauty.

My God,
Roman thought.
And to think I was convinced he could only want me this much in my dreams.

He traced Derrick's face with his fingers. The entrance was mostly dim, and he didn't have his glasses on, but they were so close Roman could see him perfectly. Hell. Had they been standing on opposite sides of a street under a downpour, Roman still would've been able to see him. That's what happened when you knew someone by memory.

"I don't think I can go another second without holding your cock in my hand," he whispered, looking Derrick in the eye.
 

 
Derrick nodded and swallowed hard. "Neither can I." He kissed Roman briefly, gave him an encouraging smile, then put his trembling fingers on Roman's shoulders and pushed him down.

Roman dropped to his knees and took off Derrick's shoes. Eyes fixed on the erection pressed against the front of his pants, Roman unbuckled Derrick's belt, lowered the zipper, and pushed his pants down his legs.

He used his knuckles to trace the erection covered by the soft material of the black bikini underwear Derrick had on. He leaned closer and did the same with his tongue. "Oh lord," he said under his breath as he freed the long, thick cock and leaned closer to rub his nose against Derrick's crotch.

It was a heady scent. It caused Roman to lose his mind.

"Oh…" Derrick whimpered, widening his stance and banging his head against the door. "
Fuck!
"

The last thing Roman remembered happening before swallowing Derrick's erection was the gentleness of fingers massaging Roman's scalp. After that, it was all sensation. Roman was too intent on pleasuring Derrick and getting his fill of his man's taste to notice anything else.

He squeezed Derrick's ass. Grabbed one of his legs and put it over Roman's shoulder for better access. He alternated between sucking on Derrick's cock and his shaved balls. And all too soon, he was losing it.
 

"You look so damn hot down there," Derrick rasped, "and you're making me feel so fucking good…" He thrust into Roman's mouth. "But I want to suck you, too."

Roman shook his head and sucked harder in an attempt to distract Derrick.

"Did you hear me?"
 

Of course he'd heard him. Roman was about to cum in his pants from how loud and clear he'd heard Derrick.

But he couldn't let that happen.

Goddamnit!

He pressed the heel of his hand against his own hard cock and focused on getting Derrick off. He considered jacking off for about two seconds, but didn't trust himself to stop Derrick if he pushed to get what he wanted. It'd be irresponsible to let him near Roman's cock. His mind knew that, but his body refused to get on board.

"Come here," Derrick ordered.

Roman ignored him. He wasn't surprised when Derrick grabbed him by the hair and tilted his face up. Before he could even blink, Derrick bent down and gave him a knee-weakening kiss.

Literally.

One moment Roman was in heaven with his mouth stuffed with Derrick's cock, and two seconds later he was on his back with Derrick straddling his hips and kissing Roman for all he was worth.
 

"Have you ever done it on the floor?" Derrick slurred between licks and nips.

Not even in his wildest days when he was younger, but Roman certainly wanted to do it now. He'd do it lying down on a bed of coals if that's what Derrick wanted.
 

"I haven't," he said softly.

"Wanna try?"

Roman didn't know how Derrick managed it, but he undulated his way out of his pants, used his feet to take Roman's shoes off, and lowered Roman's zipper at the same time he tongued Roman down.

It was official. In addition to spunky, determined, and the human equivalent to a category 5 hurricane, Derrick Swain was also an expert contortionist.

"I really wanna try," Derrick said, nipping Roman's jaw and Adam's apple… driving him fucking crazy.

Before he lost his mind and did everything Derrick asked him to, Roman wrapped one arm around Derrick's waist, pushed himself up with the other, and turned their positions in one swift move.

"Oh, God," Derrick said in a breathless voice as he pushed Roman's pants and underwear down his hips. "Get naked, sweetie, please!"

Roman obeyed at once, making a harsh sound deep in his throat when he felt Derrick tighten his arms around Roman's shoulders and wrapped his long legs around his waist.

"Oh, God," he echoed Derrick's feelings. "Oh, my fucking
God
," he grunted, grinding up against Derrick's cock.

The heat radiating from Derrick's crotch… the little noises of need, impatience, and satisfaction he made… the possessiveness of his kiss… the promise of his embrace… all of it, along with the hope spreading through Roman's heart, were the key factors that pushed him over the edge.
 

He'd had every intention of giving Derrick the best blow job of his life before cleaning him up, and, finally, tell Derrick why he'd decided to walk away a year ago. Instead, he devoured Derrick's mouth, dry-humped him to the cold floor, and ultimately used Derrick's own pre-cum to jerk him off.

Roman molded himself to Derrick's side and rocked against his hip. He kissed Derrick hard as he increased the speed of his hand. Derrick writhed, arched his back, and buried his face in Roman's chest. He looked into Roman's eyes and let out a ragged breath when they both came.

It was the best orgasm Roman had had in his life.

He was fucking shaking. His muscles were rigid, and his heart racing as he spilled so much more than semen onto Derrick's hip and the floor. That white, thick substance represented the babies he'd wanted to help create, the many ways in which he'd been a fool, and the reason why he might never see the man he loved again. Out of it all, that's what hurt the most.

"Mmm…" Derrick kissed Roman's head and hugged him against his body. "We should clean up before we get glued to the floor."

Tick-tock.

"Yeah…" Roman hugged Derrick's waist.

"Want to go to my bedroom now?" Derrick murmured, turning on his side and pressing his forehead to Roman's. "I've got condoms and lube," he added in a dreamy tone.

Roman lowered his gaze to Derrick's chest and held his breath.

Tick.

Tock.

A tiny part of Roman was relieved the time had come to reveal what had been eating him up for the past twelve months. The rest of him felt numb, as if he was already mourning his loss.

Derrick traced the curve of Roman's nose with his fingers. How could such a simple touch convey so much love, Roman didn't know, but he absorbed it like a sponge.

He exhaled loudly, turned on his back, and fisted his hands at either side of his hips. He cleared his throat, faced Derrick again, and tried not to cry when he said, "I'd love to make love to you…" he cleared his throat again. "But I can't."

Derrick frowned, looking half-confused and half-hurt. "Why?" He lifted his torso from the floor, leaned over Roman, and cupped his face. "I know I can be a persistent little shit who sometimes doesn't even let you think, but I love you, and you love me, and I thought it'd be amazing to finally experience a physical expression of that love. Oh, Lord… is that it? Do you think I'm moving too fast? I know you're more conservative but—"

He shut up when Roman pressed his index finger to Derrick's full lips.

"I'm HIV positive," Roman whispered brokenly, swallowing hard and quickly wiping his eyes with the back of his hands. "My viral load has been persistently detectable. I—" He rubbed his face and steeled himself. "I'm not sure what's going to happen to me, but the possibility of the infection progressing to AIDS sooner rather than later is front and center in my mind. If the treatment doesn't work, I'll get sick. I could get
you
sick." He wiped his eyes again and sniffled loudly. "I…
shit!
"