Heaven and Hell (25 page)

“Uh… Sam,” I started then pointed out, “when
the cat catches the mouse it usually kills it and eats it.”

He grinned at me, it was different than the
sweet, understanding grins he’d been giving me, lots different, so
different I felt my nipples tingle just looking at it and his hand
drifted through my hair as he pointed out in return, “Yeah, and you
like it when I catch my mouse and eat it.”

This was definitely true.

My body melted into his and my eyes dropped
to his mouth, his hand in my hair brought my face closer then my
eyes shot back to his, my body tensed, my hand pressed into his
chest and he stopped.

“I ran through a restaurant like the fraught
heroine in a romantic comedy,” I reminded him on a whisper. “That’s
crazy. That’s drama. That’s –”

“Real,” he cut me off. “Shit was
overwhelming you, you had a reaction and you’re allowed, Kia. You
didn’t hide that either.” He moved, rolling me and pulling us down
in the bed so my head was to the pillows, his arms were still
around me, his torso was resting on mine and his face was super
close. “What you didn’t do was, when I fucked up, hurt your
feelings, you didn’t call me on it. I keep tellin’ you I’m not him
and I’ll keep doin’ it until you work him outta you, baby, but, in
a healthy relationship, people fight and in a healthy relationship,
a fight does
not
end with you on the floor takin’ a kick.
That shit will
never
happen with me. In a healthy
relationship, you’re allowed to get pissed and in my face. Fuck, I
need you to do that so I know what buttons not to push, where I
can’t go and avoid those places. And I’ll do the same for you. It’s
part of learning how to take care of each other. It’s fighting but
it’s a form of communication and it’s also a form of trust. We have
words, we come to terms, we learn about each other and we move on
stronger.”

This made sense, but…

“Sam, I’m getting that there’s a lot I need
to deal with and –”

“I’m here.”

Those two words said so quickly, firmly,
they settled in my soul, deep and they felt good there, very
good.

But…

“You… I, you…” I hesitated then finished,
“You should know that there’s a lot of it
and
I haven’t
dealt with
any
of it. When Ozzie told me Cooter was dead, he
told me it would hit me but he didn’t mean the way it’s turning out
it’s hitting me. This, what just happened now, was the first time I
cried since Cooter died and not because he’s dead but because I
need to mourn the time he took from me. With all the stuff that’s
coming up, I don’t think I’m done. I have to talk to my folks, my
friends and
deal.
”

“Who’s Ozzie?” Sam asked.

“The Sheriff. I’ve known him since I was a
little girl.”

“Right,” Sam mumbled but said no more.

“Sam?” I called and his arms gave me a
squeeze to say he was listening to me. “What I just said, you…
maybe you and me… maybe this isn’t the right time and –”

He started chuckling.

And I was so surprised at this reaction, I
stopped talking.

Then he said through his chuckles. “Baby,
I’m
here.
Honest to God, even you can’t twist in your head
the last two nights we’ve had and the day we shared yesterday and
think that it isn’t worth goin’ through some bad shit with you to
get to those kinds of good times.”

Oh God. That settled in my soul too and it
felt even better.

Sam continued, “We got the rest of Italy and
we got Crete. When we’re in Crete, we’ll talk about what we’ll do
after Crete.”

“After Crete?”

“Kia, you live in Indiana, I live in North
Carolina and this is
not
a vacation fling.”

“Oh,” I whispered.

This was not a vacation fling. I hadn’t
really thought it out beyond the present but it was safe to say the
fact that Sam had felt good.

No.

Freaking great.

Sam kept speaking.

“But right now, we got that and what you
gotta get is you’re safe to be real with me. Shit comes up, I’m
here to help you sort it and, baby, I like where I am a fuckuva lot
because you
are
real, that’s the whole reason I like where I
am,” he grinned again, “outside the fact you’re fuckin’ gorgeous,
you got great fuckin’ legs, you look good in clothes and a fuckuva
lot better out of them.” His grin faded, his eyes changed, they
warmed in a way they warmed me and he finished, “So don’t worry
about that. If it happens, roll with it, I’m here and I’ll roll
with it with you.”

I stared into his warm eyes, they didn’t
move, they held mine, firm and steady and the warmth didn’t
cool.

He was going to roll with it with me. Like
my Dad taking my hand in the haunted house, while everything around
me was scary, Sam was offering to take my hand, make me safe and
lead me through.

Wherever you are, however you got there, if
it’s good, you’re meant to be there either because you earned it or
life led you there and you were smart enough to hold on.

I needed, right then, to be smart enough to
hold on.

I pulled in a deep breath.

Then I whispered, “Okay.”

He held my eyes, looking deep, assessing, I
knew, where I was at.

Then he decided he liked what he saw and he
whispered back, “Okay.”

“We left our food and Luci –” I started but
didn’t finish.

Sam bent his head, touched his mouth to mine
then in a fluid motion, he rolled us and I found myself on my feet
and in his arms by the side of the bed.

I tipped my head back to look at him to see
he was already looking down at me.

“You go fix your face,” he ordered and my
hand flew to my face but he shook his head and his lips twitched.
“Yeah, you’ll think it’s a mess when it’s not but I’m gettin’ from
you you give a shit about the way you look so you’ll wanna fix it.
I’ll call Luci and tell her you had a thing, it’s sorted and we’ll
be back in fifteen. That work for you?”

I nodded.

Sam dropped his head and touched his mouth
to mine again.

When he lifted his head an inch, he asked
quietly, “Are we sorted?”

I nodded again but added a verbal, “I think
so… for now.”

He bent his neck to touch his forehead to
mine a second while murmuring, “Good.” Then he let me go, turned
me, and with a his hand low at my back giving me a little push
toward the bathroom, he muttered, “Face.”

I kept moving toward the bathroom but looked
back to see Sam had his hand in his back pocket pulling out his
phone, his long legs taking him to the windows.

My legs took me to the bathroom.

Then I looked in the mirror and swallowed a
scream.

Eyes red and puffy, mascara everywhere. It
was such a mess I had to start from scratch. And Sam had seen me
like this and told me it wasn’t a mess.

He was wrong.

But I had fifteen minutes to sort it and get
back to Luci which meant I really only had ten.

So I didn’t have time to think about how Sam
could think me post-crying jag was not a mess or even how he could
see me that way and not even so much as wince.

I had to fix it and get to the restaurant.
Luci was alone and probably worried.

And, post-drama (again), I remembered I was
still hungry.

Skippy’s

“We’ll let you young people enjoy the rest
of your evening. Kia,
ma chérie,
walk with me?”

That was Celeste and I looked at her as she
spoke seeing that Thomas was catching her hint and he got up and
pulled out her chair so she could rise.

We’d had dinner together, Sam, Luciana,
Thomas, Celeste and I, and then moved to a bar for after dinner
drinks. It had been a fabulous time, a natural fit with all of
them. Thomas and Sam hit it off instantly, talking sports, and
Celeste and Luci hit it off instantly, talking fashion, restaurants
and spas. We laughed at Thomas’s stories about people he met and
things he did while he traveled, we laughed at Luci’s stories about
people she met and things she did while she modeled (and
traveled).

Now it was late and, even though Sam had
just bought Luci another drink, it was also apparently time for
Celeste and Thomas to call it a night.

And it was probably the last time I’d see
them. We’d exchanged contact information during before dinner
drinks but that afternoon I’d called a very curious Teri (but I
didn’t share, not the time or place nor did I have the two hours to
explain it all to her) to deal with the changes to my schedule and
she got me on a flight to Crete a day later, the same one Sam
booked when we popped by Luci’s to use her computer in order for
him to do just that. Sam and I would be driving to Parma the next
day, spending the night and coming back the day after, leaving
early the day after that. That meant no more time with Thomas and,
worse, no more time with Celeste.

Looking up at her, feeling suddenly bereft,
I felt my chair move slightly and my neck twisted to see Sam had
risen and was helping me up.

Farewells were exchanged, Luci and Celeste
promised to meet for lunch, Sam gave Thomas a handshake and bent to
let Celeste touch her cheek to his then she moved into me, wrapping
her hand around my elbow, she turned her head and tipped it to Sam,
saying, “We won’t keep her.”

Apparently, I was going alone.

I looked to Sam, he tipped up his chin, a
small smile on his face saying he got the message then Celeste
moved us away, Thomas following.

Thomas had found our table, a table on the
back terrace around a corner and mostly secluded from the rest of
the bar but still having a fabulous view of the lake and after we
were out of sight, Celeste leaned deeper into me, her hand giving
my elbow a squeeze.

“Official approval,
ma belle,
he’s
lovely.”

I turned my head to her and whispered, “I
know.”

“He has a lovely friend too. You can tell
much from the company a man keeps. This says good things about
him.”

I grinned and repeated, “I know.”

Her face inched closer and she asked, “If
you know, why do I sense hesitation?”

I shook my head, we were still walking and I
looked to my feet as I spoke. “I don’t know. Probably silly but he
is who he is and I am who I am and, right now, I come with a lot of
baggage on top of that and… I don’t know. I guess I wonder when
he’ll figure it out. I mean, he’s explained what he sees in me but
I’ve got a lot to process, what we have is very new and, as I
process, for Sam, it could get very
old.
And I can’t stop
thinking that, as I deal, eventually he’ll remember that he can
have anybody so he’ll wonder why he’s putting up with me.”

At my words, Celeste stopped us firmly,
turned toward me and opened her mouth to speak.

But it was Thomas who spoke.

“So can you.”

Both Celeste and I turned our heads to him
and it was only then I saw how close he was.

“Sorry?” I asked quietly.

Thomas got closer, his head tipped to the
side and his eyes moved over my face.

Then he smiled a strange, small, sad smile
and he said softly, “Kia, I just walked through a bar and every man
we passed turned to watch you. If you think you’ve been at a party
with Sam, to dinner with Sam and he has not noticed this too, you
would be wrong. That man is not stupid. That man knows, he doesn’t
take care of what he’s found, someone else will do it. He’s Sampson
Cooper and he is no fool. He knows a good thing when he sees it, my
love, and you’re right, he’s very likely a man who could have
anybody, that is, anybody who is his to have so, being no fool, he
made certain not to delay in laying claim to you.”

I stared up at Thomas, surprised, then I
reminded him, “He hasn’t laid claim to me. We’ve only just met.
This is very new. Anything could happen.”

Thomas leaned in close and whispered, “Too
true. So I shall look forward to when we meet again, a time when
I’m certain he will have chased away those ghosts that haunt your
eyes and I’ll remind you of this moment, when the beautiful Kia
doubted her power over a powerful man and she’s content in the
knowledge that not only did she do very well, but he did too.”

That was
so
nice, my eyes filled with
tears and Celeste’s fingers squeezed tight.

“There
is
a reason I love him, you
know,” she whispered in my ear, my head turned to her and she was
smiling.

I fought back the tears and smiled back.
Then I looked at Thomas.

Then I whispered, “Thank you.”

His eyes moved over my face then they moved
to his wife then his hand came up, his fingers curled around my arm
and he gave me a squeeze before dropping his hand and whispering
back, “No, my love, thank
you.
”

I pressed my lips together.

Celeste moved back to my side and guided me
forward, murmuring, “We must forge on. It wouldn’t do to burst in
gales of tears
in a bar.
”

She sounded so horrified by this
possibility, I couldn’t help but giggle.

I walked them to their car, gave Thomas a
hug and a kiss on the cheek then I moved to Celeste and she
immediately folded me in her arms and she didn’t do the cheek to
cheek to cheek. She pressed her cheek to mine and kept it
there.

My eyes started to sting again and I
whispered in her ear, “Please, come visit me. I promise to share my
treasures with you like you did with me.”

“We will plan,
ma chérie.
”

“I don’t have a spa, uh… yet, but you can
meet my Mom and she’s a really good cook.”

“Better than any spa.”

She was right about that.

Neither of us moved. Neither of us
spoke.

Until Celeste whispered, “Why can I not let
you go?”

I knew why and I held her closer, whispering
back, “Honey.”