Heavy Metal (A Badboy Rockstar Romance) (15 page)

Now it was little more than a tattered and frayed wad of fabric that barely resembled its original self.  It was probably best suited for the garbage, but I had never been able to bring myself to throw it out.  Though I had tried several times to replace it, no other cat toy had captured Mittens’ heart in the same way. 

He typically played with it almost every day, holding it firmly with his front paws while his back feet moved a mile a minute, scratching at it aggressively until he was sure the inanimate object was dead.  Then, predictably, he flipped the toy in the air and took off after it, batting it across the room – or yard – over and over until he finally got tired and collapsed in a satisfied, wheezing heap of fur and whiskers.

Now, the sight of the toy nearly made my heart stop.

I looked up at Carl questioningly, unsure of whether I should brace myself for bad news.

“That thing was sitting on the front step this morning,” Carl informed me matter-of-factly with no show of emotion whatsoever.  “I guess that means your stupid cat isn’t dead after all.  I figured you might want to know.”

Immediately, I was filled with gratitude – not to mention relief. 

“Oh thank you!” I exclaimed, so thrilled by the news that I almost could have hugged Carl even though he was, well,
Carl
.  Instead, I reached down and scooped up the ratty, well-used toy.  I held it gingerly, cradling it protectively.  I gazed down at it admiringly as though it was a precious gemstone instead of a saliva-coated, half-destroyed cat toy.

“Okay, well bye.”  Carl turned and began to walk off.

“Wait!” I called after him, hurrying to catch up to him.  “You didn’t see Mittens anywhere?”

“No.  But that cat doesn’t like me, so that doesn’t mean anything,” Carl reminded me. 

“Right,” I agreed.  “I’m going to go over to our place – I mean your place – and see if I can find him.  Thanks again for telling me about the toy, Carl.  I really appreciate it,” I told him sincerely before hurrying away.

“Hold on!” Carl called after me, his long strides allowing him to catch up with me easily. 

Stopping and turning around, I looked up at him expectantly.  “What is it?”

“You should take this,” he ordered, holding out the key to the apartment.  “It looks like rain,” he told me, glancing skyward toward the dark clouds that had moved in, invading an otherwise clear and sunny day.  “You can go inside if you need to.”

“I thought you were afraid of me robbing you blind?”

He cleared his throat.  “Maybe I overreacted.  I was angry.”

“Thanks,” I said, taking the key from him.  “I promise I’ll be out of your hair soon.”

He said nothing.  Instead, he turned and walked away.

*****

A few hours later I found myself sitting on the front step of the place I had once called home, even though in retrospect I wasn’t sure I had ever felt totally at home there.  It didn’t matter now.  That was my past.  All that mattered now was finding my cat and escaping my former life once and for all.

My voice was almost as hoarse as Brandon’s thanks to all the shouting I had been doing.  No matter how loudly I had called for Mittens, he hadn’t made an appearance.  I was exhausted, frustrated and about to call Brandon for some much-needed moral support.

When a shadow fell over me, I looked up.  Carl was standing there looking at me. 

“What are you doing out here?” he demanded, as though the answer wasn’t obvious.  “It’s about to rain.  You’ll catch a cold if you keep sitting out here,” he added with a scoff, as though he could hardly believe how stupid I was.

“I don’t care.”

“It’s a cat,” he told me.  “Let it go.”

“I can’t!  Mittens has been with me since I was a teenager.  He stuck by my side through it all.”

“Well so did I, but you didn’t seem to give a shit about that,” Carl pointed out.

So that was where this was headed.  He was about to give me his usual speech about how I should be grateful to him for saving me from a bad situation.  Wonderful.

The way he bragged about coming to my rescue made it seem as though he wanted a medal or something.  But no superhero I knew of constantly berated his girlfriend and treated her like she was disposable and unworthy of respect.  So it seemed that Carl’s perception of himself as a selfless, heroic martyr was greatly exaggerated.

I wasn’t in the mood for listening to him, so I stood up.

“I should get going,” I said, interrupting him.  “You’ll let me know if you see Mittens?”

“Yeah, sure,” Carl agreed with a tone of indifference.  “Where are you headed now?”

Looking up at the sky, I saw that Carl had been right.  It was about to rain.  “I guess I’ll head back to the B&B for the night,” I replied, resigning myself to the fact that my search would have to wait until morning.  It felt like I was failing Mittens, but one could only do so much, right?

“I’ll drive you,” Carl announced in an uncharacteristic display of kindness.

“You don’t have to do that,” I protested.

“I know.  Come on,” he ordered, jerking his head toward the street where his car was parked.

I had been on my feet all day, walking the streets in search of my cat – and some direction in my life.  The day had been a total failure in every way, which hadn’t exactly done much to boost my morale.  I felt exhausted both mentally and physically.  Emotionally, I was barely holding it together. 

The thought of walking down to the end of Main Street made me even more tired!  I felt weak, battered and bruised.  So even though Carl’s offer to give me a ride was very unlike him, I shrugged it off and followed him to his car.

“Wait here,” Carl told me suddenly.  “I’ve gotta take a piss.”

Oh, he was as classy as ever!  When he turned and walked back to the apartment, I found myself grateful that he at least hadn’t unzipped and relieved himself right there in the street.  That was something, right? 

For the millionth time, I wondered what I had ever seen in him.  It wasn’t that I had ever thought he was Prince Charming – I hadn’t.  In all honesty, he had simply been a better option than staying with my junkie mother and her creepy husband.  So in a way, maybe Carl and I had been using each other.  He’d had someone to control and in return I had gotten some semblance of safety.

As I thought about that, suddenly I began to understand why it was so important to me to become self-sufficient.  Part of it had to do with pride, sure.  But I also didn’t want Brandon to ever feel like I was using him.  I knew he was suspicious about some of the people in his life, fearing they gravitated toward him due to his fame and money.  I wanted him to know I wasn’t like that. 

I wanted him to know without a shred of doubt that all I wanted was him.  The celebrity and fortune had nothing to do with it.  I would love him even if he was a beggar on the street because it was his kind heart and gentle soul that had swept me off my feet, not his ever-growing bank account or high profile connections.

When Carl returned we drove in silence, which was fine by me.  Actually, it was preferable to having to talk to him.  I stared out the window as the town passed me by.  I had spent my whole life there but it felt foreign and unwelcoming, perhaps because of all the negative associations I had with it.  I couldn’t wait to leave.

When we stopped in front of the three storey Victorian style bed and breakfast, I politely said thank you.  Then got out and walked up to the quaint red door without so much as a glance back in Carl’s direction.  But it flew open before I could let myself in, startling me.

It was the owner, and her thin lips were pursed in an expression of disapproval.  There was a look of determination in her steely grey eyes and – if I was reading her right – also a slight twinge of barely concealed disapproval. 

“Hi,” I greeted her, wondering what was up.  Something had clearly happened because earlier that very morning she had been nothing but warm and accommodating.  Now she seemed to be anything but.  Tentatively, I asked, “Is everything okay?”

“I’m sorry but you can’t stay here tonight,” she informed me, not sounding sorry at all. 

“What?”  I asked in confusion.  “Why?”

She hesitated and then admitted, “We need the room for someone else.”

Furrowing my brow, I tried to make sense of that.  “What do you mean?  I thought I had the room reserved?” I asked, feeling my face begin to heat up.  I hated confrontation and usually tried to avoid it whenever I could. 

“Well it’s not reserved anymore!” she snapped impatiently.

Taken aback by her abrupt demeanor, I tried to make sense of what had happened.  There was only one possible explanation I could come up with that made sense.  With a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, I asked, “Was there a problem with payment or something?”

“No.”  She paused and then admitted, “A man called a bit earlier today and insisted on having the room.  I told him it was already taken, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer.  He offered to pay double our nightly rate.  I can’t turn that down.  I have a family to support.”

I stared at her, dumbfounded as her words sunk in.  “Don’t you care about customer service?” I demanded, feeling anger boil up from within me. 

She was being pretty horrible and to add insult to injury, she wasn’t even acting apologetic about it.  Sure, she had said sorry, but even as the word had tumbled out of her mouth she had glared at me like I had done something wrong.  I didn’t understand it.

“You’ll get a refund for tonight,” she shrugged, as though that made everything better.  But it didn’t.  It didn’t solve the problem that had arisen through no fault of my own – where was I going to sleep that night?

“A refund isn’t going to help me much,” I pointed out, my voice beginning to shake with anger.  “You’re the only bed and breakfast in town and I don’t have anywhere else to stay!  And yet you just boot me out with no warning?  That’s a really shitty thing to do!”

Behind us, a car door slammed.  I turned around to see Carl sauntering over to us, his eyes heavy lidded and his signature smirk on his unshaven face.  Apparently he hadn’t driven away yet and had witnessed the exchange, which was growing increasingly confrontational by the moment.

“Is there a problem here?” he asked, looking from me to the other woman curiously.

“Yes,” I complained, glaring at the owner of the bed and breakfast as I spoke.  “I’m supposed to be staying here tonight but my reservation has been canceled!  Now what am I supposed to do?”

“You can stay with me tonight,” Carl told me as the owner of the bed and breakfast turned on her heel and huffily stormed inside, clearly annoyed that I had dared to call her out on her poor business practices. 

Carl’s invitation sounded more like a command than an offer.

“I can’t do that,” I protested.  It would be far too weird.

“What else are you going to do?” he asked smugly.  “You don’t have any other options.”

Ignoring him, I pulled out my phone and called Brandon.  Though I hated to ask him for even more help, this was kind of an emergency.  I had no idea how I would pay him back for all his generosity, but I swore one day I would.  That was the only way I could justify accepting his much-needed assistance.

But he didn’t pick up. 

I let the phone ring and ring, hoping desperately that Brandon would hear it and answer.  I was painfully aware that Carl was staring at me the entire time.  In fact, he wasn’t just staring.  He was glaring.

“Who are you calling?” he demanded.  “Is it another man?”  His jealousy was evident.

Ignoring the question, I hung up the phone and tried calling again, praying that Brandon would pick up this time.  But luck wasn’t on my side.  There was still no answer. 

Carl looked downright gleeful when I finally gave up and dejectedly put the phone away. 

“Oh would you look at that.  I guess your new man isn’t so reliable after all, huh?” he taunted with a self-satisfied smirk on his big stupid face.  “I’m the only one who’s here for you and I’m the only one who will ever stick around.  No one else can give you what you need.  Every other man will get bored with you and move on, trust me.”

I realized I had literally no place else to go.  If I didn’t agree to stay with Carl, I would be out on the street – I didn’t even have a car to spend the night in!  As much as I hated to accept his invitation, if it could be construed as such, I didn’t know what else to do.

“I’m sleeping on the couch,” I growled, trying to make myself sound menacing. 

“Fine,” he shrugged.  “I have better things to do than mess around with you anyway.”

Oh, he was as delightful and charismatic as ever.  What a prick!  But as much as I hated to admit it, I really did need to rely on Carl’s help.  So begrudgingly, I agreed to spend the night under the same roof as the man I had been so relieved to escape.

*****

The phone Brandon had provided me with rang hours later, startling me from a fitful slumber.  I fumbled around for it in the dark, my head still foggy and my body aching.  Carl’s couch was lumpy and uncomfortable, and staying with him had filled me with tension. 

But Brandon was on the line.  Thank God.