Her Pregnancy Surprise (35 page)

Sara clung to his shoulders, afraid her knees wouldn’t hold her. He had the power to turn her bones into mush. She couldn’t say anything to reassure him, not yet. But she’d given the situation a lot of thought over the days he’d been gone. She had decided she would give notice once the tax season ended. Feeling grateful to the firm for giving her her first job and the promotions that had moved her into her current position, she didn’t want to leave them at a critical time. But she wanted to share Matt’s life, and if that meant traveling the world, then she was all for it.

“It’s been endless. I’m so glad to see you.”

He brushed his mouth across hers.

“Can you leave now?” he asked.

“Yes. Let me get my purse.” She didn’t even tidy up her desk, but grabbed her purse and headed for the door.

“I’ll be back in the morning,” she told Stacey.

“Y’all have fun,” her assistant said with a wide grin.

“I took the bus, so I didn’t have to worry about parking. I can ride home with you,” Sara said as they descended in the elevator.

“Want to eat out tonight?” Matt asked, linking his hand with hers, lacing their fingers. “I’m all for a quick meal and then home to bed.”

“Sounds great.” She squeezed his fingers, wondering what he’d say if she suggested they skip dinner.

Matt arranged with his partner Tony to borrow his sailboat Saturday and that morning, Sara woke with a feeling of excited anticipation. She’d been looking forward to speeding across the Bay in the sleek craft since he’d first suggested the idea. She dressed warmly. Despite the sunshine and balmy temperatures for March, it would be cooler on the water.

When they reached the marina, Sara was surprised at the sleek, elegant boat. The mast towered above them. It was spacious, yet small enough for two to handle. When Matt gave her a tour, she found it had all the amenities of home.

After exploring the interior, she stepped out on the deck where Matt was studying charts. The gentle motion of the boat made her feel a little queasy, but she ignored it. This was another new adventure. She would have many to come with Matt. She wanted to explore everything that came her way.

“Aren’t we just going sailing? Isn’t the Bay deep enough for the boat, or are there channels we have to stay in?” she asked, looking over his shoulder at the charts with the squiggly lines.

He turned and pulled her close with an arm over her shoulders. “The Bay is surprisingly shallow in many spots. Not enough for the sandy bottom to poke up from the water, but enough we could drag a sandbar if we didn’t know where we’re going. I thought we’d sail to Sausalito and have lunch there. Maybe go out beneath the Golden Gate Bridge later.”

She looked across the expanse of water at the large nature preserve called Angel Island. They would get really close to that on the way to Sausalito. Maybe even see deer from the boat.

“Sounds great. What shall I do?”

Matt gave her very basic instructions and before long they cast off.

Sara had little to do once they were on the Bay and sat near Matt, enjoying the wind blowing through her hair. She still felt a bit queasy and tried to ignore the fact, but when they left the shelter of the marina, it grew rough. Tiny whitecaps topped the waves as they skimmed along, moving up and down as they headed for the Island.

Soon Sara was unable to do anything but try to concentrate on not being sick.

“Are you all right?” Matt asked, glancing at her.

“I will be,” she said, taking another deep breath of the clean air. She couldn’t be a bad sailor. This was something Matt loved. She wanted to do everything they could together. She’d get her sea legs soon, she just had to!

“You look sick.”

“Oh.” With that, she dashed to the small bathroom on the boat and lost her breakfast. Rinsing out her mouth, she held onto the small sink, looking into the mirror. She looked awful.

“Sara?”

She spun around. Matt looked in at her. “Are you seasick?”

“I think so. What are you doing here? You should be steering the boat.” Visions of them crashing into something rose.

“I dropped the sails. We’ll drift for a bit, but there’s nothing nearby. I didn’t think you’d be seasick,” he said. “I’ll see if Tony keeps any remedies around.”

“It’s my first time on a sailboat, I didn’t know I’d react this way. I’m feeling better already,” she said, embarrassed to be a problem on a day that had started out so promising.

“Want to head back?”

She shook her head, feeling miserable. “No. I’ll conquer this, let’s keep on to Sausalito. I can get something there for the return trip.”

In a short time Matt had the boat flying toward the Marin coast and the quaint, arty town of Sausalito. Sara stood near the rail, watching the distant horizon. She’d read somewhere that watching the horizon would help with seasickness. Only, it didn’t seem to be working. She still felt awful.

She greeted their arrival with relief. Stepping on the dock, she took another deep breath, hoping the queasiness would fade now that she was on dry land. In only moments, she felt marginally better.

“I thought we could eat at a sushi bar near here,” Matt said after the boat was secured against the slip.

The thought of fish almost made Sara’s stomach revolt again.

“No. Not yet. I think I need to find my sea legs
before I could face fish. What I think I’d like is someplace where I could get a cup of soup.”

“There are a lot of restaurants within walking distance from here. We’ll find something to suit you.”

They wandered around the small village, perusing menus, commenting on the outdoor cafes. Sara took time to look over her shoulder at the skyline of San Francisco now and then. The air felt cool blowing from the Bay, but the sun kept the temperatures comfortable. As she walked, she began to feel better. She dreaded the return trip, however.

Another disappointment. Maybe she wasn’t as ready for life on the wild side as she’d hoped. She hoped Matt wasn’t too upset. She felt as if all her plans were being extinguished one by one.

Matt took Sara’s hand and headed up Bridgeway Street. He was disappointed she didn’t take to sailing like he did. Tony rarely used his boat since his marriage. His wife’s sister was wheelchair-bound, so they didn’t go often. Tony made it available to Matt and Dex whenever they wanted it. Matt had thought about taking Sara sailing for an extended time, maybe taking a trip down to Monterey, or up to Fort Bragg.

But if she was bothered by the light chop in the Bay, she’d never survive the larger swells of the Pacific.

They passed a deli, and he stopped.

“They have soup and sandwiches, let’s try this,” he suggested.

She smiled and nodded. “I want to eat on the patio,” she said, nodding toward the outdoor tables and chairs on the side patio.

He couldn’t gage if she was feeling better, or just
putting on a good face. He stopped her before they entered, resting his hands on her shoulders. “If you’re not feeling well, I can call Dex or Tony or someone to come get the boat. We don’t have to take the boat back.”

“Actually I’m feeling much better. I’m sorry to be such a wet blanket. I never thought I’d be the type to get seasick.”

“Maybe you just need to get used to it.”

“I guess.”

He was struck once again by how pretty she was when she looked up, her eyes dark with concern. “I really want to do this,” she said.

“Give it time. If sailing doesn’t agree with you, we’ll try something else.” He wasn’t sure what. He loved the freedom of the boat. If he were in town longer between assignments, he might have considered getting his own. But the upkeep was too much with his erratic schedule.

“Let’s eat and I’ll see how I feel,” she said.

After lunch, Sara declared she was fine. They wandered around the shops in the quaint little community. Matt bought ice cream for them and they sat in one of the many little parks, enjoying the view of the Bay and San Francisco. He didn’t push about the return trip, but if she needed someone else to take back the boat, he wanted to call them soon.

She enjoyed everything they’d done since landing. He glanced around. Normally he wouldn’t have spent so much time in such a tourist spot. But with Sara, he saw it with different eyes.

The town was clean and fresh and pretty with all the flowers and mini parks. With the bright sunshine,
and the fresh breeze, the day was ideal. Slowly he began to relax. He would never have suspected a month or two ago that he’d be married and content to spend a day doing virtually nothing.

“Ready to go?” she asked, tossing her napkin in the nearby trash barrel.

“Want me to call someone to come get the boat?”

“Nope, I’m ready to sail the seas again!” She smiled and stood. “Come on, Captain, our ship awaits!”

Matt was relieved to see her enjoying herself on the return trip. It wasn’t quite as rough with the wind behind them, and Sara even asked for a turn at the helm. He stood close by, not just to help, but from a need to be within touching distance. He had only know her a few weeks, but somehow it seemed like forever. He wasn’t one to analyze relationships. Usually he’d been more the love them and leave them type.

But Sara was different. Around her, he was different.

He watched as San Francisco came closer. Tomorrow they’d go apartment hunting again. He hoped they’d find something they both liked. With most of her things at her apartment, it felt as if she was just visiting. She still stumbled over the his and ours when talking about his place.

He knew she was adjusting to marriage, he was, too. But he had no problem thinking of it as their place. Of thinking of Sara at home when he was away.

“This is great!” she called, laughing at the fun of it. She looked at the dock, coming faster than expected.
“Oh, yikes! What do we do now? Are we going to crash?”

“We furl the sails, and take it in under power,” Matt said, moving to begin the process. It was going to be all right. She had her sea legs now and they could do this more and more as the summer took hold.

Working together, Sara questioning every step, they secured the sails and headed for the slip under power.

When they docked, she flung her arms around his neck. “That was so much fun. I think I got my sea legs on the return trip. Can we do it again soon?”

He swung her around, liking the feel of her soft feminine body against his. He glanced toward the cabin, calculating whether they could use it or if he could wait for her until they got home.

“As long as Tony isn’t using it. We could take a longer sail next weekend. Maybe even head out under the bridge.”

“Wow, on the ocean? Let’s explore around the Bay some more before we go there. I don’t want to chance my luck.”

He looked at her for a long moment. Her eyes were sparkling, her smile infectious and her cheeks kissed by the sun and wind to a rosy hue. He would like to always see her so excited and happy.

They found the perfect apartment the next afternoon, two bedrooms, a large living room and a kitchen big enough for them to move around together without bumping into each other. It was only two blocks from Matt’s current one and had a view that matched. Since
it was already vacant, they arranged to move in prior to the end of the month.

“Which gives us less than four weekends,” Sara said as they returned home. “I’ll have to spend next weekend going through things, and make sure Amber can get over there by then.”

“Give a couple of months’ notice. That’ll give you plenty of time. Just because we can move in, doesn’t mean you have to have everything out of your old place by then.”

“Oh, good point.”

She danced around the apartment. “I’m so excited. We’re getting our own place.”

He leaned against the wall and watched her. “We have our own place here.”

She stopped and looked at him. “Sort of.”

“But?”

“But at the new place, there won’t be any memories of other girl friends,” she said slowly.

He was taken aback. “You make it sound like I had orgies here or something.”

“Did you?”

He shook his head.

“I’m being silly,” she said, going to stand by the window to look out. “But after Leslie’s visit, I feel like I’m just one in a long line. I can’t wait to move.”

He crossed to stand beside her, unsure of what to say. He couldn’t deny Leslie had been here. As had a few other women over the years.

“That’s all in the past, sweetheart. If it makes you unhappy, we can stay at your place until we move.”

She leaned against him. “No, I’ll be fine. I’m just
happy we’re moving. You won’t have to go any where before that, will you? I don’t want to do all this alone.”

“I’ll make sure I’m here for the move.”

T
UESDAY
afternoon Sara almost fell asleep at work. She was so tired. They’d been packing since Sunday afternoon, staying up late to get things organized, then making love before going to sleep. She had more work than she could handle, but after the praise from her boss, she didn’t want to disappoint him by asking to shift some of the load to one of the other accountants.

She got up and walked around, hoping to wake up. Maybe a soft drink with caffeine would help. She couldn’t even focus on the numbers.

The phone rang. She lifted it up, still standing. If she didn’t get something to wake up, she’d have to close her door and see if a quick catnap would work.

“Sara Tucker,” she said.

“I like the sound of that,” Matt said.

“Me, too. What are you up to? Is something wrong?” He rarely called her at work.

“Not wrong, just an inconvenience,” he said.

She caught on at once. “Not another trip?”

“Stockholm. But just for a couple of days.”

“You said you’d be here for the move.”

“I will, that’s a promise I’ll keep. I’m taking one of the new representatives with me. Once I’m sure he’ll manage, I’ll return home. I probably won’t be gone more than two or three days.”

She didn’t say anything. What was there to say? It was his job. She’d known it from the beginning.

Stockholm.

She looked at the piles of folders, printouts and tax books on her desk. Maybe she should just say goodbye now and take off for Europe with her husband.

She wanted to go so badly she could almost taste it.

“Sara? I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, Matt. I just was wishing I could go.”

“Ask for time off.”

It was so tempting.

“Not now. I just can’t. But I’ll be writing my resignation letter earlier than I thought.”

“Good. Quit. We’ll get settled in our new place and then be ready to go when the next call comes.”

“I hope you get another assignment in Paris soon.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“You’re not leaving before dinner are you?” she asked, suddenly wondering if that’s why he called.

“No, we’re leaving tomorrow morning. But I thought I’d get it over with, telling you.”

“Gee, you make me sound like some kind of grouch or something.”

“This way, you’ll get your anger out and be loving when we’re together tonight.”

She laughed. “You’ll be lucky if I stay awake long enough to watch you pack. I’m so sleepy this afternoon.”

“We’ll go to bed early tonight, I promise.”

The conversation went a long way to waking Sara, and she plunged back into work with renewed enthusiasm. The sooner she finished, the sooner she could go home.

Amber called just as Sara and Matt finished dinner.

“Hi, honey,” Sara greeted her daughter.

“Mom, Jimmy’s leaving in the morning.”

“Oh, so soon? I thought he had a little longer.”

“I did, too, but they want him somewhere else now. I hope he has better luck staying in one spot with his next assignment. You’d think they’d have enough communication specialists over in Germany they wouldn’t need one more right away.”

“Is he there with you now?”

“No, he’s on base. We said goodbye earlier. I’m bummed, but there isn’t much I can do about it. I guess I just wanted to whine to someone.”

“Whine away. It does seem unfair. But he’ll be home in a few months and you two will be getting your own place together—like Matt and me.”

“You found a place? Oh, tell me about it,” Amber said enthusiastically.

Sara spent the next few minutes telling her all about the new apartment, their plans to move and Matt’s assignment.

“I thought you were planning to travel with him, Mom. So far you’ve only been to London. Tell him he can take me if you can’t go.”

“What about school?” Sara asked sharply.

“I’m just kidding. Finals are in two weeks. But I’d love to visit Stockholm, or Paris or any place, come to that.”

“I’ll let him know. Want to have dinner one night while both our men are away?”

“Sure. Let’s go pig out on pizza.”

“I’ll call you when I see how things go at work.”

When Sara hung up, Matt asked about Amber.

“She’s feeling lonely, I think. Jimmy is leaving tomorrow.”

“She can keep you company while I’m gone,” he said.

“We did make a date for pizza. And she said to keep her in mind for a junket to Europe—when finals are finished.”

“The only one I want to go with me is you,” he said, reaching for her.

By Thursday, Sara was convinced she was coming down with something. She plain didn’t feel good. And she was so tired, despite getting plenty of rest every night. When Stacy popped into the office at one point, she looked at Sara with concern.

“You all right? You look like something the cat dragged in,” she said with her forthright manner.

“What a way to cheer me up. I feel awful, actually. Maybe I should head for home,” Sara said, leaning back in her chair. She was afraid if she closed her eyes, she wouldn’t waken for a month.

“Yeah, well swing by the drugstore on your way,” Stacy said.

“Flu medicines you think?”

“Pregnancy test, I think.”

Sara stared at her, her heart racing. “We use protection.”

“The only one hundred percent protection is not doing it at all. And I suspect from seeing that lusty husband of yours that is not the case. You could be coming down with a cold or the flu, but check it out anyway,” Stacy said, taking a stack of completed forms and leaving.

Sara was rooted to her chair.
She couldn’t be pregnant.
She’d had her family—Amber.

Matt didn’t want children, or to be tied down. He
liked life in the fast lane, liked traveling to a new country every week. He liked sailing in sleek boats and skiing and doing who knew what else.

Oh God, she couldn’t be pregnant. She couldn’t go through that again, not at her age, not when she wanted to travel and see the world. They’d talked about moving to London—not about all the cares and responsibilities of motherhood. She wanted a chance to live for herself, not another child.

Feeling shocked, she grabbed her purse and headed for home—via the drugstore. She had to know. If it was negative, she was worrying for nothing.

But what if the test proved positive?

Trying to keep from panicking until she knew for certain, Sara hurried through the store and almost flew home. Once there she took the test, holding her breath as she waited for the result.

Positive.

She felt sick.

The last thing in the world she wanted was to start another family.

What would Matt say?

Bill had been properly receptive to the news she was pregnant, and then abandoned her after only a few months of a new baby in the home.

What would Matt do? He hadn’t wanted children. They’d planned their future. He was already annoyed with her for the delay in resigning her job.

Oh, no. Another problem. Dare she resign now? What if she ended up a solo mother again? She’d need the income her job provided. And the security, seniority, stability.

Pacing the small bathroom, Sara tried to think. But
her mind was a jumble of thoughts and she couldn’t focus on a single one.

She had to tell Matt. But how?

She’d have to decide what she was going to do. Stay at work? Travel as much as she could before the baby was born? Then what?

Did the new apartment even allow children?

Sara burst into tears. Her lovely plans for the future had just ended and she didn’t know what to do.

For the first time since she met Matt, Sara didn’t want to see him. She hoped his trip proved complicated and urgent and he stayed a month in Stockholm. Not that the situation would change between now and then, but maybe she’d come up with way to explain how everything they’d planned had changed.

Would he leave? Ask her to leave and keep his bachelor apartment? Would there be other lovely young women parading through like Leslie?

Soaking a wash cloth in cold water, she wrung it out and went to lie down with it over her swollen eyes. A baby should be a joyous event. Instead she was fretting about the future.

She remembered how scared she’d been when she’d found out she was expecting Amber. She’d been so young at eighteen, and had wanted to do so much.

Her second chance had come, and once again, she was pregnant.

There was a knock on the door.

Sara considered ignoring it. But it sounded again.

“Mom?”

Amber.

She hadn’t even thought of what Amber might say.
Slowly Sara rose and padded across the apartment in her bare feet. They were supposed to go to pizza tonight. She should have called and postponed.

She opened the door.

“Hi, Mom,” Amber said cheerfully, stopping when she saw her mother. “What’s wrong?”

“Come on in.” Sara felt the tears well again. This was a happy occasion, she had to remember that. She never wanted this new person to feel he or she hadn’t been wanted. Even though the timing couldn’t have been worse.

“Mom, did you get bad news? Is Matt okay?” Amber touched Sara’s shoulder tentatively.

Sara shut the door, leaning against it for strength. “Matt’s fine, I’m fine. I haven’t had bad news, just news. Good news,” she forced herself to say and tried to smile.

“If this is good news, I don’t want bad,” Amber said. “What is it?”

“I’m pregnant,” Sara blurted out.

Amber stared at her. “You can’t be,” she said.

Sara gave a shaky laugh. “Thanks, but the pregnancy test says differently.”

“Mom, you’re too old to be pregnant!”

“I am not,” Sara said indignantly.

“Obviously, but I mean, I thought you and Matt planned to travel and do things all over the world, not start a family.”

“We do. Did.” Sara pushed away from the door. “Want some tea?”

“I don’t think tea is going to fix this. Should you be drinking caffeine?”

“One cup of tea isn’t going to matter. And I need something.”

“When did you find out? How does Matt feel about it?”

“I found out about a half hour ago and Matt doesn’t know.”

And she was scared to death to tell him. It would change everything. She wondered how long she could go before he’d notice? It would be the cowardly way, but she wanted his arms around her, she wanted his laughter and his sexy ways to wrap around her and make her feel desirable and wildly exciting.

For the life of her she couldn’t envision that once he knew she was pregnant.

“Wow,” was all Amber had to say.

“I don’t want to go out,” Sara said. “Want something here?”

“We can order pizza to be delivered. This is so weird, my mother pregnant. I’m going to have a baby brother or sister. I always wanted one, but not at this late date.”

“Well you’re getting one now,” Sara snapped. She’d never known Amber wished for a sibling. Not that it had been possible with Sara’s cautious attitude around men. The first time she cut free and let herself live and look what happened.

“Hey, Mom, I think it’s great,” Amber said, giving her mother a hug.

Sara clung. She wanted reassurance. She wanted something to hold on to. What would Matt say? The tears started again.

“Hey, Mom, be happy. Any cravings yet? We could order pizza with pickles and ice cream if you like.”

Sara laughed, hugging Amber, then stepping away.

“No odd cravings yet. Let’s get our regular order.”

Matt picked up his bag from the luggage carousel and headed out of customs and toward the long-term parking lot. He was dog tired but anxious to get home. The three day assignment had stretched out to a week. He’d missed Sara. He’d called her when he could, but with the time differences and their conflicting work schedules, the calls had been few and far between. And unsatisfactory to boot.

He didn’t want to hear her voice, he wanted to hold her, see her enthusiasm when she spotted something new, or fascinating. He wanted to hear her laugh, watch her. Share places he loved, see if she’d love them, too.

As he put his laptop and bag into the car, he made up his mind. He’d force the issue of her resigning if she had not already done so. They’d talked about traveling together, if she was serious, he wanted her with him starting with the next trip, or the one after that for sure.

He understood loyalty, and admired her for wishing to help the firm through the busiest season, but there was no reason she couldn’t give notice now for April 16 as her last day. It was only a few weeks away.

He wanted some show of faith in him from his wife. Was she afraid he couldn’t support them? Maybe they needed a frank talk about finances. He had enough invested to see them secure the rest of their lives. Maybe if she understood that, and being an accountant, she’d be able to recognize it at once, she’d feel better about letting go her job.

In the meantime, he’d see if he could keep closer to home, maybe stay in the office for a while and get a better handle on some of the new representatives
they’d hired. He wanted to check out their training program to make sure it wasn’t lacking in any areas. The young rep who had gone with him to Stockholm had been fast and efficient, and thrilled to be on his first overseas assignment. But shaky on some of the company’s protocols.

After a while travel became routine, as the new rep would find out. Since most of their clients were clustered in a few locations, he’d seen it all before, many times.

Being with Sara would make it all new again for Matt. New and different and far more exciting than he remembered it being in a long time. He wanted to show her the world.

He almost called her from the car, but he’d had enough of telephones. He’d be home in less than half an hour. With no assignment on the horizon, he could focus on packing up his place, helping her with hers and moving into the new apartment that would be their home for the future.

When Matt opened the door of the apartment a little later, he paused a moment, hearing the soft music, inhaling the tempting aromas coming from the kitchen, catching a whiff of Sara’s special scent. His fatigue fled. He wanted his wife.