Here Comes the Light (Cambrooke #1) (14 page)

“You didn’t trust me. It’s the same old story.” I step towards him and he leans back a little. “If you really cared you would have been in your car and driving to come get me the minute you heard my voice.”

His
hands fly up in surrender. “I’m sorry, geez.”

“You didn’t even call me all weekend to see if I was alright. I could have bee
n murdered and you would have…”

“Alright you two, time to get to class.” I am interrupted by Miss Andrew’s voice. I turn and see her and her class of freshman students as our audience.

“This is better than Days of Our Lives.” I hear a girl’s voice gush.

“Sorry Miss Andrews.” I speak softly before turning away from Hudson and making my way down the empty
hallway to my Literature class.

“Miley,” Hudson says surprised when I am standing on his front porch waiting on him. It has been three days since we had that fight in the hall and we haven’t spoken since. Neither of us has changed our Facebook status to single, but this little game we are playing waiting for the other to speak first is driving me crazy.  “What are you doing here?” he asks as he shuts the front door. 

I lean against the pillar and lift a shoulder.
“I came to see you.” I look down and see the keys in his hand. He’s leaving to go somewhere. I hesitated knocking when I heard him and his mom in the middle of a fight. “You have a few minutes?” I speak softly.

“Yeah,” he nods holding up his keys, “I was only leaving
because my mom was being pain.” He looks out at his car. “Want to go for a drive?” he asks.  I shake my head. “We can go for a walk.”

“I just want to get this conversation over with.” I sigh as I look up into his big brown eyes.

“What conversation?” his voice is quiet and concerned.

“The one where we break up
again.” I say looking at the ground. I gently tap my foot on the concrete porch. He slowly sits down in the rocking wicker chair.

“Is that…is that what you want?”

“No…” I say a little too quickly. “I mean yes.” I shove my hands in the pockets of my jeans, “I don’t know what I want. I know I don’t want to be ignored.”

“Miley, you’re the one that told me to leave you alone.” He says.

This makes me flip my face up towards him. “I never said that!” I say defensively.  He always puts word in my mouth.

Hudson throws his hands up in the air. “I don’t know what you want from me.”

“Do you want to be with me?” I ask with all seriousness, pointing to myself while staring him square in the eyes. He nods his brown eyes big and round.  “We need to communicate. I can’t stand trying to guess what you are thinking.” I hate it that my stupid voice cracks right now.

He lifts his hand and waves for me to come closer without saying a word. I think about this for a minute. Then finally take a few steps closer, close enough for him to grab my waist he
pulls me towards him. His hands rest on my hips. He keeps eye contact with me. Those sad brown eyes melt all my resolve. “I want to be with you. I do.” His thumbs begin to glide gently in circles on the skin just above my jeans.  “I’m sorry I’m such a jerk sometimes.” He shrugs. “I wish I wasn’t.” He says just before he pulls me down onto his lap. “I miss you.” He whispers in my ear as his arms encircle around me. Just then he dad pulls in the driveway ruining our moment.

I forgive him and all things are good the next couple days so when Friday rolls around I am more than stoked to spend the evening with him. “What time are you picking me up again?” I ask as I open my locker door.

“Eight.” He replies.

“Eight?” I whine. “We haven’t spent much time together lately.” I bounce on the balls of my feet while batting my eyes at him. “What about six.” I smile.

He laughs a little, “Okay, six.” He leans down his lips almost touching mine when his eyes move behind me and he stops himself. I turn my head to see Miss Andrews watching us. He leans back and winks at me. “See you at six.” He says before he makes his way down the hall. I hear him greet Miss Andrews in his suck-up voice.

“Hey, you got plans tonight?” I hear Declan’s voice behind me.

“Yeah.”
I say flipping around, “Hudson and I have plans, sorry.”

“Well he can come too. Trey is having a little get together at his house, just wanted to invite you.”

“Thanks, but I think we will skip out on the church get together.” I roll my eyes. There is no way Hudson would be up for it.

“It’s not a church get together we are just getting together and playing video games and eating pizza.” He says as he hangs his hand on my open locker door.

“Yeah?” I tilt my head and smile sympathetically at him. “Hudson and I kind of want to be alone.”

His eyes widen. “Oh, right.” He nods. Why do I feel guilty about this? It isn’t like we have been anything more than friends.  “Well call me if your plans change alright?” he says before strolling away.

I am about ready to explode in excitement. Things are finally going to be good between Hudson and I. We get to be alone tonight. I may just let him go all the way again. This time I will remember it.
It is just a little before six when I finish the last of my makeup. I walk to my bedroom window and he still isn’t here. It’s early. I sit down crossed legged in the middle of my bed and pick up a magazine that Jess brought over. I dog ear a couple of hair styles I want to try and check my clock it’s just now six.  I walk to the window just in case he pulled in and I didn’t hear him. Okay, he is only a few minutes late, not a big deal. I sit back down and try to concentrate on the magazine again, but I can’t. I pace. Fifteen minutes later, he still isn’t here. I breathe. He is just running late, maybe he had a fight with his mom or something.  6:25 he still is nothing. I hurry to my cell when it goes off, disappointed to see Declan’s picture instead of Hudson’s.

“Still busy?” he asks.

“Yeah, just waiting on Hudson.” I sigh.

“Hudson may be interested in coming over to Treys if you tell him he has a pool table.” He says this like watching my boyfriend play pool would be a fun evening for me or something.

“We really just want to be alone.” I try to explain again.

“Alright, well I just thought I’d offer again.” He replies in his usual chipper tone. “Call me if you need me.”

“Okaaay.” I speak slowly. Call him if I need him? What is that supposed to mean?

It is 6:35 when I get off the phone with Declan. Where is he? I send him a quick text asking him where he is. Wait for another ten minutes before finally calling. No answer.  What if something happened to him? Maybe he had a wreck and is along side of the road dying somewhere. I send another text, still no reply. I call his house his mom tells me he left an hour ago. He should have been here.

It is now seven and I am fuming mad. I hate waiting. I am in tears by 7:30 all the hurt and betrayal of our whole relationship comes down on me at once. My tears of rejection turn into tears of anger in another ten minutes. I hate I had my expectations so high tonight. It’s now 7:55… maybe he has a good reason for being late. Maybe something really did happen to him. I have been waiting a whole two hours.

By 8:15 I am on my bed, face buried in my pillow. He doesn’t love me, he lied. He always lies to me. He doesn’t care. My dad doesn’t care. Why was I so dumb to think he changed? I continue to sob into my pillow. 8:30 I am pacing again. Hating myself for ever thinking he would change. I am so stupid. I throw mys
elf back on the bed and sob more.

At 8:45 I put my pajamas on. I give up on him showing even if he does I won’t go anywhere with him. I grab som
e ice cream from the freezer, sit in the middle of my bed and mope. This isn’t the first time he has done this to me, but it is going to be his last. My heart sinks when I realize it is nine and he hasn’t even tried to call me. I try to call him again. This time he answers and I can hear loud music in the background. I am immediately irate.

“Where are you?” I snap.

“Miley,” he slurs.

“Are you drunk?” my stomach clenches.

“Just came out to have a few with the guys.” He says all happy like he didn’t just leave me waiting here for three whole hours. “I’ll only be a few more minutes.”

“It’s already been three hours!” I shout.

“Oh shoot.” He mumbles. “Coby, I told you to not let me forget about Miley tonight.” He shouts in my ear.

“I waited here all night for you.” I am in tears now. “I couldn’t wait to be with you, I was going to have sex with you again.”

“Really?” his voice is hopeful.

“Not anymore. Not ever again.” I say before hanging up on him. Tears fly down my cheeks, everything is a blur. He went out with his buddies and ignored my calls until he was too drunk to remember he was ignoring me.
I pull the little box out of my night stand. I grab a needle and press the cold metal against my skin. Hopelessness falls on me as the blood appears on my arm. My phone beeps, its Hudson trying to text me now.  I throw my phone across the room and my face falls into my hands I cry until I’m numb. I lie back and stare at the ceiling, trying to find shapes in the textured tiles, anything to keep my mind off him.

My door bell chimes. I slowly turn my head to glance at the clock. 9:30 now. I do
n’t want to see anyone. I make my way to my window and see Hudson’s car. I am definitely not going let him in. I trudge back to my bed and lie down again. He calls my cell. Then he rings the doorbell. I know he isn’t going away. I stomp back to my window and throw it open.

“Go away!” I
shout down at him.

Second later he steps off the porch with a little sway.
Reminding me he is drunk so not only did he stand me up, but now he is drinking and driving as well. “I need to talk to you.” He attempts to throw his arms out but almost loses his balance.

“I don’t want to talk to you.’ I shout back down at him before slamming my window shut. He stands outside and rings my doorbell for another fifteen minutes before I slip
Declan’s hoodie on and stomp downstairs.

“Would you
stop.” I say as I fling the door open. He rests a hand on the door jam.

“Miley, I’
m sooooo sorry.” He slurs.

“
Sorry is getting old.” I chide.

“I forgot I told
Coby I would hang out with him tonight. I planned on only having a few and then I was coming over to get you.” He hiccups now. “That stuff must have been stronger than I thought.”

“You should have called.” I cry.

“I know.” He reaches for me but I back away.

“I can’t keep letting you trample all over my heart all the time.” I sniff.

“Miley, please.” He tries to touch me again and I keep back just far enough, “Don’t do this.”

“Go away.” I don’t budge.

He sighs and rubs the back of his neck. “I said I was sorry.” His voice is now filled with anger, no longer remorse. “Quit being such a dang drama queen.” He shouts as he finally moves fast enough to grab a hold of my arm. My heart drums inside my chest as his hand grips around my arm so tight it burns. This is the first time I ever felt he would hurt me. Instead of showing him fear I glare at him and pull my arm away.

“You need to leave.
Now.” I speak with force.

“I’m sorry, Miley.” He says quickly.

“Go!” I speak but don’t even look at him.

“Fine.” He snaps before I hear my front door slam and his car peel out of my driveway. I drop to the floor where I am standing and sob again into my knees. This time it has to be over for good.

Once I regain a little composure I call Declan. “Things didn’t go as planned.” I say when he picks up.

“Sorry about that. How are you doing?” he asks with concern.

“Not good.” My voice cracks. “It has to be over for good this time, D.”

“You want me to come over?”

“If you aren’t still at your friends.”

“I was just leaving. Be the
re in a few.” He says. I catch glimpses of myself in the hallway mirror. I look horrible, black streaks going down my cheeks and tousled hair. I run upstairs to my bathroom and redo makeup and brush my hair back into a pony tail. I hear Declan pull up when I am just finishing my hair.  I barrel down the stairs to meet him.

I thought my night was ruined until I saw Declan. 
His compassion towards me when we talked about my problems was something I’ve never experienced. I am normally told what a drama queen I am instead understood. Declan’s presence and his concern have a way of making me feel better.

Chapter 11