Here Comes the Light (Cambrooke #1) (11 page)

Declan was way too understanding about me canceling our plans last minute to hang out with Hudson. I feel bad, like I don’t deserve a friend like him. I push my American History book into my locker thankful I don’t have any homework I have to take home with me. I feel an arm slip around my waist. “Hey sexy.” He whispers in my ear sending chills down my arm. A smile immediately stretches across my face.

“Mr. Ley, no PDA’s in school.”  A stern female voice comes from across the hall, no doubt Miss Andrews, since that is where her art classroom is. Fresh out of college this is her first year of teaching
. She is attractive so of course the guys flirt with her to try to get out of trouble if it isn’t that big of a deal she lets it slide, however she does lay down the law when needed.

“Miss Andrews, you’re just jealous.” Hudson throws his charming smile her way.

“I mean it; Hudson, I will have to give you a detention if I see it again.” She speaks with authority.

“You ready to go, Miley?” his voice is still smooth as he removes the arm from around my waist. Miss Andrews watches us walk away making sure there is no inappropriate touching on the way out. Hudson smiles and winks at her.

“Hudson,” I gasp.

“She likes it.” He says through a chuckle. I don’t think I am going to be able to look Miss Andrews in the eye tomorrow, good thing I don’t take art.

“Let’s go get something to eat.” Hudson says as he r
eaches his hand across the console of his old beat up black Trans Am.  He laces his fingers through mine even though he is going to have to remove his hand soon to shift again.

“I’m not
hungry.” I sigh.

“How can you possibly not be hungry? I noticed you didn’t eat lunch today.” He says squeezing my hand a
little tighter. He was paying that much attention to me? I don’t answer hoping he will drop it, I don’t know why I think he will.  “Miley.” He removes his hand from mine to park. I stare at the dull, cracked plastic on his console. “Why aren’t you eating?” he asks. I just lift a shoulder, unable to look at him. “Miley.” He says now in a stern dad voice. I hate it when he talks down to me like he is my dad.

“I just need to lose a few pounds.” I snap as I finally look up at him. “Okay.” I say in a snotty tone that he hates.

His face flinches for a second before concern falls on it. He reaches his hands up and cups my cheeks. “Miley you don’t need to lose weight, you are thin enough.” I try to turn my head away but he doesn’t let me, he keeps my face in his hands. He tilts his head, “you want to be a skeleton with skin like Jess.”  I don’t respond. “Miley, being able to see bones is not attractive.” He speaks softly as he thumb grazes my cheekbone.  “You want to be with me, right?”

“I think.” I speak barely above a whisper.

“What do you mean you think? We belong together.” He speaks quickly. “You are the hottest chick at school.”

I have to laugh at this. “
First of all I am not a ‘chick,’” I hate being referred to as a farm animal. “And second, I’m not pretty.”

“I’
m sorry, about the chick comment. I forgot how you felt about that.” He says with laughter on his voice. “But you are pretty, Miley.”

I hold up a hand in between us. “I am done talking about this right now.” Hudson begins to open his mouth again. “Please.”

Hudson drops the subject when I ask him too, but he still takes me to get something to eat to appease him, I eat. Then once he drops me off I run on the treadmill for about an hour hoping that is enough to burn off all the calories I took in. After I shower, I lie on my bed my dad is of course not home and I still get this creepy feeling being here alone. Like I am alone but yet someone is here that shouldn’t be. I try to concentrate on my magazine tips on creating the perfect beach wave hair.

When my phone goes off I jump almost falling off my bed. Once my heart slows down a little and I realize there isn’t a murderer in my room, just a new text message I look at my phone.

Declan: How did things go with Hudson?

Me:
sorry 4 standing u up.

Declan: no prob. I
’m here ne time u need me

Me:
thanx.

I sit the phone down and lean back, I can’t believe he is being so nice. How can he not be upset with me? He has been nothing but a good friend and I blew him off. The guilt stirring inside me makes me take my little box out from my nightstand. Can the cuts take the guilt away? I slowly open the box when my phone beeps again.

Declan: U still there

Me: YRU being so nice 2 me?

Declan- should I be mean

Me: yeah I am a horrible person

Declan: no ur not.

I don’t respond to this and receive another from him.

Declan: What’s going on?

I still don’t reply. I can’t bring myself to. Several minutes later he sends another.

Declan: Helloooooo?

I can’t take this, with h
im trying so hard. He has no clue what a horrible person I am. I turn my phone off and lie down in bed pulling the covers over my head I pretend I am the only person in the world there are no others that I can upset or disappoint. It isn’t hard to do when my mom is gone and my dad is barely home, to retreat into my own little world where I am the only one who exists.

“So have you had enough time yet?” Hudson asks. I asked him yesterday just to give me more time and today he wanted me to come over after school. I am sitting on his bed and he is on a chair in front of me his knees are on either side of me. His younger sister is here so I am not worried about him expecting anything.

“I think so.” I say breathing in his awesome cologne smell. The whole room smells like him. There is a thump right outside his bedroom door. We are being spied on, no doubt.

“Carly!” he shouts over his shoulder at the spying fourteen year old on the other side of his door. “Go away.”

“I’m telling mom and dad you have Miley in your
room.” She says all snotty.

He stomps towards the door. “I am going to get you, you little brat.” He growls as soon as he opens the door she screams and runs away. He doesn’t run after her like he said instead he shuts his d
oor and locks it. Placing his iPod on the speaker dock sitting on his desk by the door, he turns some music on. Hip hop. Not really my kind of music, don’t get me wrong I love the beat to it but the things the singers say about women really bothers me. I know I am weird that way. I don’t know why. Jess and Nova can listen to this stuff and they love it.

He sits back down in front of me I think a little closer than he was before. He smirks
“now she won’t be able to hear us.” His hand runs up my leg as he leans in for a kiss.

“I would love to have a si
bling to fight with.” I say when he pulls away from the kiss, looking down at me with a hazy smile on his face.

“What about us?” he asks ignoring my last statement. “
You going to give us another try?”

“Yeah,” I say not able to hold back my smile. “I think we deserve another try, right?” I say breathily.

“Yeah, I agree. This isn’t worth throwing away.” he says huskily as he leans in for another kiss. His hands find the bottom of my shirt now and up my stomach they go to their favorite place to be. I am so hypnotized by him right now, his kisses soft and knee weakening. He gently pushes me back and leans on top me when there is a banging on his door. He groans and pulls his lips away from mine. My lips tingle, wanting more.

“
Carly go away!” he shouts over his shoulder before looking back down on me with a smirk.

“Hudson Scott Ley, you open this door right now!” his mom’s voice shrieks from the other side of the door. I see instant horror on his face when his eyes meet mine of course I probably look just as shocked.

“What is your mom doing here?” I gasp.

“I don’t know.” He jumps off me, “she is supposed to be at work.” He hurries to the door, unlocks and opens it. Amy stands there with a scowl on her face at Hudson.

“What are you doing with Miley in your room?” she growls at him. I just want to hide, crawl under his bed and disappear. Amy probably thinks I am a slut.

“Mom, we weren’t doing anything.” he shouts back at her. I am a little shocked to see this. “Quit being stupid, you can see we still have our clothes on.” He picks at his tee shirt.

“Don’t talk to me like that.” She snaps.

“Whatever.” He
growls and turns and starts back towards me like his mom isn’t even there. I have of course sat up before he opened the door, though the idea of climbing out his window is dangling in my mind.

“Hudson, don’t you walk away from me.” she says sternly. His face contorts and he turns and grabs a football of his dresser.

“Go away, mom!” he shouts throwing his football at her she slams the door just before it hits her. I think I am going to be sick. I listen to her stomp off. I can’t believe she is just going to take it.

“Y
ou can tell a lot about a guy by the way he treats his mother.”
I can hear Nova’s mom say. For some reason Nova’s mom always thinks I need unsolicited advice. I guess since I don’t have a mother myself.

I stand. “I should go.”

“Miley, don’t leave because of that old hag.” He says as places his hands on my hips and pulls me close. Something about the way he is talking about his mother doesn’t sit right with me.

“She is your mom.” I speak softly.

“She is annoying, just like my sister. They’re nosey.”

“The way a guy treats his mother is the way he will one day treat his wife.”
Nova’s mom’s voice echoes again in my mind.

I place my hands on his chest and look up into his big brown eyes. “You really should go apologize.” I would give anything to have my mom and here he has his and he is treating her like dirt.

“Are you taking her side?” his removes his hands from my waist and backs away.  “We weren’t in here having sex. She’s overreacting.”

“She doesn’t know what we were doing in here. It was getting pretty close to it anyway.” I say in my defense. He smiles.

“Are you saying you would have done it again with me if we weren’t interrupted?”

I shake my head. “I don’t know, probably not.” I push myself away from him.

“Whatever.” He growls. “You can be a pain in the butt sometimes.” I take a second to shoot him a nasty glare.

“And you can be a jerk.” I snap before storming out of his bedroom door. I feel awkward walking through this house.
I don’t know what to say to Amy if I see her. It seems like forever, but finally I reach the front door. Relieved I dodged the bullet I pull the door open and step out on the porch, and… I have not dodged the bullet after all. Amy sits on the porch steps she turns towards me. Her face tear streaked and cigarette in hand.

“I’m
sorry about that, Amy.” I mumble as I look away. I can’t make eye contact.

“Miley, you must think I ‘
m some kind of crazy lady.” She says before taking a drag off her cigarette. I try not to gag at the smell of it. She blows the smoke out of her mouth. Amy is thin with curly blond hair; she is beautiful.  “I had Hudson when I was seventeen.” She looks up at the sky. This is news to me. I never knew that. She had a baby at my age? Hudson. “I don’t want that for you two.” She sighs before looking at me. “Scott and I were just like you. I was cheerleader he was quarterback of the football team. We married when I was pregnant with Hudson and turned around and had Carly barely two years later.” She shakes her head; again her gaze goes up towards the sky. “Hudson has his father’s temper.” She lifts the cigarette back up to her mouth, inhaling more smoke. She turns back to me and studies me for a minute. “I am only 34, Miley I can’t be a grandma yet.” she states.

“You’
re not going to be.” I assure her as I sit down on the step.

“I feel like a failure, I really didn’t want Hudson to end up with his father’s temper.” Amy smashes the lit end of her cigarette into the concrete steps before tossing it into the yard. I just sit here silently. I don’t know what to say to her. I know her and Mr. Ley do not have a good marriage at all. I hear him yelling at her a lot when I am on the phone with Hudson. What if I do stay with Hudson what if I did have sex with him again, would this be me in seventeen years?

She turns towards me. “I know Hudson loves you, but you two are not ready to be parents.” She says.

“We aren’t having sex.” I say despite how awkward it is to be talking about this
to her.

She lets out a little laugh and taps my knee, “yeah, that is what I told my parent too.” She looks at me all serious now. “Are you on the pill?”

I am taken aback. “What?! No.” I quickly shake my head at such a crazy question.

Amy just frowns a little. “If it is too much to talk to your dad about, I can take you.” She adds. Yeah it is too much to talk to my dad about, despite him being absent most of the time I am still his little girl and if I asked him to take me to get on the pill because I want to have sex with Hudson he would grab his shot gun and head over here in seconds
.