His Love Shattered (Love Shattered #2) (9 page)

Courtney

I am finally off work for the day and I am so thankful. I love my job but I hate having to go into work each day knowing my kids are at home and not having to go to school. Especially now that they have me working every single day and I don’t have my days off anymore.

Thank goodness for Dexter. If he wasn’t here I don’t know what I would have done having to pay full time childcare for three kids during the summer months. I really wish I could just quit and not have to work at all.

I think I am going to tell Dexter tonight that I have chosen to stay and not leave with Dave. I have no desire to be with Dave at all and after lots of back and forth in my mind, I feel I have reached a solid decision. I love Dexter and I know he will be there to support me in my decision. He loves my kids as if they were his own. I can see it in his eyes and the way he is around them.

Today when I showed up at Mileys dance camp and saw that he had let her dress how she wanted to it melted my heart.

Then when I saw him trying to avoid that woman’s advances it made me love him even more. The relief on his face was palpable when I showed up. I was glad I got there when I did to rescue him.

Pulling into my driveway I shut off the car and take a deep breath trying to gather my strength to tell Dexter the truth. He is so easy to talk to, I don’t know why I am so concerned. I step out of the car and head for the house locking my car with my remote in hand. It beeps twice alerting Dexter that I am home and he meets me on the front porch.

He pulls me into a warm embrace and kisses my forehead. I love when he welcomes me home this way. He has done it every night this week so far.

We walk inside and the wonderful smell of dinner fills the air. “It smells delicious in here. You don’t have to keep cooking dinner you know. I could do that when I get home.” I tell him.

“I don’t mind and I know you are tired after working all day it’s the least I can do. Go ahead and have a seat. I already have Miley in her seat at the table. She has been asking about you all afternoon so I am sure she will be glad to see you.” I walk into the kitchen and sure enough Miley is strapped into her booster seat and a glass of wine is waiting for me at my spot at the table. I walk over and give Miley lots of hugs and kisses and take a seat and sip on my wine.

Dexter brings me a plate of chicken pot pie and it looks delicious. I wait for him to be seated at the table before I dig in.

“Mmmm Dexter this is incredible. Where did you learn to cook like this? A girl can get used to this man. Mmm Mmm.” The different flavors explode on my tongue and I can’t get enough. It tastes as delicious as it looks and smells.

“My momma taught me how to cook. I am glad you are enjoying it, it is her recipe. She will be glad to know I cooked it to perfection.” He smirks.

“Well remind me to thank your mom for teaching you how to cook.” I wink at him and he just looks over at me amused.

“Courtney there is something I want to talk to you about tonight. It can wait until Miley is in bed though because I don’t want any interruptions once we start talking.” I am wondering what he wants to talk about that is so important. Then I remember there is something that I want to talk to him about as well.

“Well that’s funny because there is something that I want to talk to you about too. You can go first though. We can wait until Miley is asleep, that will be fine.”

We finish up our dinner. I clean up the kitchen since he did the cooking and he gets Miley ready for bed. When it’s time to tuck her in, I head into her room to give her some good night snuggles and read her a bedtime story.

“Can Dexter read me my story tonight, Mommy?” Miley asks. I glance over at Dexter and he nods his head yes. So I sit on one side of her while Dexter sits on the other and he reads her a bedtime story. It’s moments like this that take my breath away. The man I love reading to my daughter. We are all snuggled up on the bed. These are the memories to last a lifetime. I find myself happy once again for choosing to stay.

When the story is over and Miley is sound asleep we head into the living room to talk. He grabs the bottle of wine and pours me another glass. I sit down on the love seat with one leg tucked under me and the other dangling off the front of the couch. Dexter sits right beside me the same way and we angle our bodies towards each other.

“Those bed time stories are pretty good. Earlier Miley fell asleep half way through and instead of getting up and putting the book down, I sat there enthralled in it and finished it to the end. I probably shouldn’t go around telling people that though. That is probably the quickest way to lose your man card.” He laughs and I join in on his laughter. He really is just a big ole teddy bear in a sexy man’s body.

“Well we can’t have you losing your man card now can we? So what did you want to talk to me about?” I ask taking a sip of wine to calm my nerves. I hope he isn’t overwhelmed here with having to keep up with the kids while I have been at work. He keeps telling me its fine and he doesn’t mind, but he isn’t used to this kind of life and I don’t want to scare him off just when things are starting to get good between us.

“I don’t know how to say this so I will just come right out and say it. I think you should quit work. I know you haven’t made a decision yet about staying or going but either way I think you should quit.” He rushes out in one breath. Wow! That is not at all what I was expecting him to say. I am stunned silent for a moment. When I don’t speak right away he continues to talk.

“I figured if you are leaving with Dave there is no point in working anymore because it’s not like you can keep the job. Then if you choose to stay I want to be the one to take care of you. You can quit work and stay home with the kids and we can all enjoy our summer together.” Well shit he is offering everything I have been wanting since I started working all on a silver platter.

Part of me wants to accept immediately the other part of me is hesitant because that’s the life I had before. When Dave died, well I guess he didn’t actually die, but when he was gone I was left to fend for myself and the kids. I don’t want to be in that position again if something ever happened to Dexter. Just thinking of anything possibly happening to him makes my stomach churn and my heart ache.

“I am shocked Dexter. I don’t know what to say. I mean I couldn’t ask you to do that. What if something happened to you? I would be right back on the same boat I was before. I am just not sure.”

“Courtney baby I want to do this for you and the kids. I can tell how much having to go to work every day breaks your heart. I want you to be happy. I love you. I know it’s too soon right now but I want you to move to Alabama with me and live on the farm. The kids would love it. You can even work if that’s what you really want, but I don’t think it is. Let me be here for you. Let me provide for you and the kids.”

“I know what you are saying Dexter it all sounds wonderful. What if something happens to you though? I don’t want to be in that situation ever again. It took me two years to find a job Dexter. Two. Years. I can’t go through that again.” I shake my head and a single tear slips down my cheek. He is right there wiping it away.

I want nothing more than to move to Alabama and be with Dexter. I just can’t overcome the fear of losing him. It almost killed me losing Dave and what I feel for Dexter is ten times more powerful than anything I ever felt when Dave was around. That scares me terribly. I can’t lose Dexter too. I wouldn’t be able to come back from that.

“Babe if anything ever happened to me I would make sure you and the kids were set for life. You would never want for anything. I would never leave you in the position that Dave did. I am not going anywhere for a long time sweetheart not if I can help it. I plan on us growing old together. So please at least think about it okay?” I nod my head yes and agree to at least think about everything he has said.

“I will let you know soon what I decide. Who knows because if I have another work day tomorrow like I had today then I am liable to just walk out of there and never look back. That place was a mad house today.” Dexter has come over to sit on the arm of the couch and is rubbing my tense muscles. It feels so good. He takes such good care of me. I don’t think I need to think about it anymore.

I know right in that moment what I want to do. It’s flashing through my mind like a neon sign. I am going to quit my job. It didn’t take long for me to figure it out. Once I was out of my little pity party moment the answer became clear as day. Plus wasn’t I just thinking that I need to start living life in the moment because you never know what will happen?

We can’t predict the future and I couldn’t be sure that something would never happen to Dexter, but I was sure as hell going to live every single day to the fullest with him instead of living in fear of the what ifs.

“Dexter, I have already decided. I am going to quit my job. I really do hate working especially now that they have changed my schedule from what we had originally agreed on. I am so appreciative of everything you are offering. Thank you so much. I love you.” I lean my head back onto his chest and he stops massaging my neck and shoulders for a moment.

“I love you too babe. I think you are making the right decision. I would have supported whatever decision you made, but I really think this was the right one.” He leans over and kisses my cheek. Then begins massaging again.

“Oh and there is one more thing. I would love to move in with you. I know you said it’s too soon and we can wait until you are ready. Maybe take the summer and figure everything out. I think the kids will love Alabama and its close enough to the beaches for me. So you just let me know when you are ready.”  I pull him into a kiss before he has a chance to reply.

Dexter

Courtney drags me into a kiss trying to cut off my reply but I quickly pull away. I am sure my face shows how shocked and ecstatic I am at what she has just revealed to me.

“You’re serious?” I shout out a little louder than intended. I don’t want to wake up Miley so I lower my voice “You want to move in with me? You have just made me that happiest man alive baby.” I grab her up underneath her arms and spin her around in a single circle and place her back down on two feet.

“So wait a minute…” I paused trying to regain my composure. “So that means you decided to.. to stay?” I stutter out. “You’re not going to go away with Dave? Are you… Oh my God… You mean” I am rambling on and on. I am about to burst into happy tears. My excitement is causing me to forget how to form complete sentences. I look over at Courtney. She is biting her lip on one side and she is nodding her head up and down saying yes enthusiastically.

“I have decided to stay.” She says softy like she almost doesn’t believe it herself.

“I am so happy baby. You will not regret this decision. I will spend the rest of my life proving to you that this was the right choice to make. I love you.” I grab her to me in a sweet gentle kiss. Pouring all my love into it. Sealing the deal with what I have just promised to her.

I know this was a hard decision for her so I plan on reminding her every single day how much she means to me. It’s going to be a rough road ahead for a while but Courtney is the strongest person I know. As well as her kids, they are just as strong as their Momma. Together as a family we will move forward and keep pushing on. With a love as powerful as ours we will come through on the other side stronger than ever if that is even possible.

Courtney deepens the kiss then surprises me by jumping into my arms and wrapping her legs around my hips.

“Take me to the bedroom Dexter. I think we have some celebrating to do.” I don’t hesitate to take her straight to the bedroom. She doesn’t have to ask me twice. When we get inside I kick the door shut with a little more force than I intended. I reached behind me and twisted the lock into place. I stalk over to the bed and toss Courtney onto the mattress. She lets out a shocked squeal and scoots up the bed so that her head is resting onto the pillow.

I strip out of my clothes in record time and go over to the bed and climb on headed right for Courtney. Just as I am slipping her shirt over her head there is a soft knock on the bedroom door. Followed by a tiny voice on the other side.

“Mommy I am scared I thought I heard a scream.” Miley says through the door. She must not have her box fan on that Courtney was raving on about the other night. Either that or she heard us over the fan.

Great
.

I climb off of Courtney with a horrified expression like we have just been caught. Even though we had the door locked and we hadn’t really gotten to the good stuff yet I still feel bad for waking her up.

Courtney just chuckles and shakes her head in amusement. I make quick work of getting dressed in a pair of sweats and a plain white t-shirt. Courtney straightens her clothes back into place and I do a double take to make sure we are both dressed appropriately before I open the door to let Miley inside.

I open the door and bend down to pick Miley up giving her a kiss on the cheek. I carry her over to sit her on the bed in the middle of the mattress.

“I am sorry you were scared sweet girl.” She looks over at me rubbing her big blue eyes looking just like her momma. She is obviously still half asleep.

“Can I sleep in here with you and mommy tonight? I don’t want to be scared.” Miley says. I am not sure that I understood her correctly. All I caught out of all of that was she didn’t want to be scared. I look over at Courtney for help.

“You want to sleep in the bed with us tonight Miley?” Courtney asks her. Miley nods her head yes.

“If it’s okay with Dexter you can sleep in here with us since you are scared.” Courtney tells her.

“Can I sleep in here with you and Mommy tonight Daddy?” Miley asks and that right there I heard clear as a bell.

Courtney gasps and I have to sit down before my knees buckle beneath me. She just called me Daddy and I couldn’t be more elated. I am not sure how Courtney feels about that and I am scared to look over at her because I don’t want the expression on her face to be sad. I am fucking over the moon that Miley thinks of me as a Father.

Sure she may not really know what she means when she says it, but it still means a lot to me to hear those words leave her tiny lips. I would be honored for Miley to call me Daddy. I do not want to replace her Dad but I would give anything to be her Daddy.

I finally take a chance and glance at Courtney. Tears flow down her cheeks but she doesn’t seem sad or upset. They seem to be happy tears. Her blue eyes are sparkling like the sun. I realize that Miley is still waiting for my answer and there is no way I can tell her no after she just called me Daddy.

“Of course you can sleep in here with me and Mommy.” I pick her up and hug her tightly. I move to the head of the bed and pull the covers back and place Miley in the center where she can sleep between Courtney and me. I look at Courtney over Mileys head and mouth
are you okay
to her. She knows that I am referring to Miley calling me daddy and she mouths back
yes I am fine.

I reach over and turn off the lamp by the bed.

“I love you Courtney and I love you Miley. Goodnight my beautiful girls.” I tell them both.

“Goodnight Dexter I love you too.” Courtney says first.

“Night. I love you too Daddy.” Miley says next and I am glad that it is dark in the room so neither of them can see the tears in my eyes.

The next morning I wake up with a crick in my neck feeling like I got very little sleep. I had to sleep in such a tiny little ball my whole body ached this morning. My pillow was stolen and the covers were pulled off of me some time throughout the night. For someone so little Miley sure took up most of the bed. Want to talk about bed hog? I am sure Miley takes the cake on that one. At one point she was sleeping completely sideways in between Courtney and me, our bodies forming the letter H in the bed. Then I woke up and she was sleeping at the foot of the bed so I picked her up and put her back in the middle between Courtney and me.

I woke up several more times to move her back in the middle, then I eventually just gave up and tried to sleep through all the kicking and the musical bed game she seemed to be playing in her sleep. I may be tired and achy this morning but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I still had a smile on my face. The tiredness would fade and the kinks in my neck would go away but the happiness I felt would last forever.

My girls were still sleeping. Courtney had maybe an hour before her alarm for work went off so I jumped in the shower real quick letting the hot water work the kinks out of my neck and back. Shutting off the water, I grabbed a towel and dried off. I got dressed and headed to the kitchen to start the coffee pot.

I decided to make waffles for breakfast so I set forth with that task. I was just finishing up when my two sleepy eyed princesses made their way into the kitchen. I gave each of them a kiss on the cheek and then swooped up Miley and put her in her booster chair. I made her a plate, cutting up the waffles into tiny pieces and giving her a dab of syrup on her plate so she didn’t make too big of a sticky mess to clean. I learned my lesson the other day when I gave her a generous size helping of syrup. I didn’t think I would ever get her cleaned up after that. The table and booster chair were just as bad. It took forever to clean.

I give Miley her sippy cup of milk and then I take Courtney’s plate over to her. I added fresh strawberries to hers, just how she likes them. I take my seat across from Courtney and dig in.

“So when are you planning on giving the bakery your notice that your leaving?” I ask Courtney.

“I am going to go type up my two weeks’ notice after breakfast, that way I can go ahead and get it over with. I don’t really want to work a single day longer than I have to.” She laughs.

“I don’t blame you. With kids as great as yours I can see why you want to spend every second with them. I am glad that I am able to give that option back to you.” I tell her.

“It means so much to me Dexter, thank you.” She finishes off her last bite and walks over to the sink to wash her dish and sits it in the drying rack. She leaves to go type up her resignation letter and I stay in the kitchen to watch after Miley while she finishes up her breakfast.

When Miley finishes up I take both our plates to the sink and wash them up and then grab a rag to clean off Mileys hands and face. I let her down from her seat and she goes off in search of her Mommy.

I am finishing up with tidying the kitchen when Courtney walks in looking sexy as hell in a pair of tight ass skinny jeans. It’s like my body moves on its own and before I know it she is wrapped up in my arms.

“I know it isn’t easy sleeping with a toddler but thanks for agreeing to that last night. I can’t believe she called you Daddy. That melted my heart. Was that okay with you? It wasn’t too awkward was it?” She asks.

“Are you freaking kidding me Courtney? That was the best feeling in the world when she called me Daddy. If she wants to call me Daddy then I am perfectly okay with that. I know it will be different with Jason and Caleb because they were older and they remember their Dad but Miley doesn’t have those memories. She was just a little thing when he left and she needs a Dad in her life. I want to be that for her.” I look up to Courtney and she has a sad expression on her face.

“What is it baby? What’s wrong? If you don’t feel comfortable with her calling me Dad then we can tell her to just call me Dexter. I will do whatever you want to babe.” I try and explain.

“No, it’s not that. I am thrilled that she called you Daddy and that you want to be Daddy to her. It just makes me feel guilty. Being so happy knowing Dave is alive and well and here we are still carrying on with our lives like he is still dead. It’s just going to take me a while to come to terms with it all. I just feel bad because I haven’t even seen Dave to tell him the news and here we are happy like he has already gone.” She looks over at the clock on the wall and sighs. I glance up at the clock as well and see that she is running late.

“We can talk more about it later babe. You should get into work. Go give them that letter so that I am one day closer to having you here with me this summer.” I smack her on the ass to try and lighten the mood and send her on her way after a quick kiss goodbye.

I stand on the porch and watch her pull out of the driveway. I give her a little wave when she pulls away and I head inside to find Miley so we can begin our fun day together.

It’s mid-morning and I have spent most of the morning playing with dolls and having a tea party with Miley. I have some things I need to get done today, so we are putting our fun on hold for a little bit.

Before we head out to run some errands and go to the park, I decide to give my mom a call and fill her in on the good news. I know her and my dad have been waiting patiently to hear whether or not Courtney was staying or leaving.

My mom answers right away.

“Hello there son. How are you?” She asks in her tangy southern drawl.

“Hey Mom. I am fine. I have some good news though. Last night Courtney let me know that she has decided to stay and at the end of the summer her and the kids will be moving to Alabama with me. I couldn’t be happier Momma.” I say with excitement clear in my voice.

“That is wonderful news son. So does that mean I finally get to meet the wonderful woman who has stolen my son’s heart? How about dinner tonight? You know your dad and I have been waiting for this moment.” Shit I should have known she would want to have her over for dinner the second she found out.

“I will have to ask Courtney. I am not sure tonight will be a good night though. I have to go pick up Jason and Caleb in a little while and it will be the first night that all the kids have been home since Saturday. I am not sure she will want to send them off to a sitter tonight.”

“I won’t listen to your excuses Dexter, you know the kids are welcome just as much. I would love to meet them all and what better night than tonight. Ask Courtney and let me know what she says.” She scolds.

“Okay, Mom, I will call you back when I know. Love you.”

“Love you too, son.” Now that my mother is off the phone I send Courtney a quick text.

Me: My mom wants to have us over for dinner tonight. Are you okay with that? If tonight doesn’t work we can pick a different time.

She responds back almost immediately. She must be bored at work this morning.

Courtney: I am not sure if tonight will work all of the kids will be home. I haven’t seen Jason and Caleb in days. I don’t want to send them off to a sitter tonight.

I knew she was going to say that. That is why I had already brought that up to my mom while we were on the phone.

Me: Mom said to bring the kids she wants to meet all of you.

Courtney: Okay if you are sure you want to be that brave then we can go to your parents for dinner. I forgot my lunch again today any way you can bring it by while you guys are out running errands?

I agree to take her lunch by of course. Yes I am that brave and I don’t think Courtney realizes that her kids are great and will do fine meeting my parents. My parents have always wanted me to have kids. These may not be my own but I know they will treat them as if they were. I call up my mom and let her know we will be there for dinner and she tells me to arrive at six o’clock.