Holding On (50 page)

He leans his face down to my clit and
his hands spread me open and he bites it then sucks it hard. I yelp
and I’m met with another blow, this time to my ribs. I have no
breath to expel. I’m dizzy.

“
Went to Texas, killed
Switch. Pussy was in hiding, scared of my boss. My superior killed
Doc. Doc was weak. Switch was even weaker. The Peril mighty duo
about fucked it all up. I wanted to kill them too when we saw them
in Texas snooping. Boss said no, better time to do it. Now though,
I get to do it. They come for you, they will die.”

He grabs my breast and pulls hard.
Both hands are on my chest pulling my skin and jerking them up, I
whimper in pain now I can’t hold it back. “Like that? I knew you
did.” He continues to pull and push on them, I’m doing all I can to
just stay still but my rib is throbbing, along with my face and
head.

“
You’re so stupid, I had
conversations in front of you! They were about
you
! The ‘package’, you were that
very package you dumb slut. God I wanted to tell you or have you
catch on just so I could hurt you then. I had to wait though,
patiently. No more.”

He unzips his pants and bile comes to
my throat. He has his cock in his hand and he’s stroking it hard.
It’s stiff and he’s starting towards my mouth, oh god no. I won’t
survive this. Oh god. Then I hear someone coming at him, quickly.
Before I can register what is happening Greyson drops to the floor
in front of me. I look up and find my dad.

“
Oh Daddy! Oh God, you
found me! Daddy!” I’m crying. I’m shaking and I’m waiting for him
to get me out of here. He doesn’t move. He’s staring at me. I’m
exposed and he’s staring at me not moving. He’s in shock, has to
be. “Daddy help please before he wakes up, please.”

“
Mace.” His voice sounds
shaken. He is in shock. “Mace, I never meant for this. Fuck, I just
didn’t think. I didn’t see past… Oh Mace I’m sorry.”

What? What is he saying? I’m so
confused now. I don’t understand why he isn’t moving to get me out
of here. Greyson is starting to stir on the floor beside the bed, I
can’t see him but I can hear him groaning.

Realization is hitting me. My dad is
meant to be here. He’s part of this, unsure how but I can sense he
is because I’m exposed and he’s just standing there beside
Greyson’s body on the floor and he’s looking down at me, in
remorse.

“
Daddy, I don’t
understand. Please help me. He’s waking up and he… he… he will hurt
me again. Please.”

Dad looks down at Greyson and quickly
moves his hips and leg and delivers a severe blow to Grey, then I
don’t hear the moaning anymore.

“
Fuckin’ animal. He’s a
fuckin’ crazy, sick bastard. Cherry I could almost deal with,
really I could. She was nothing more than a drain to society. Not
you Mace, I never meant for him to hurt you. Fuck, I didn’t think
about this.”

“
Let my arms go, please.
I’m hurting all over. I’m so thirsty. Help me please.”

He stares at me for a few long seconds
then reaches to the table in the corner of the room and grabs a
blanket out of its drawer. Thank God he’s going to help me now. I’m
trying to focus on dad and not Greyson who is still lying near me
next to the bed.

“
I’m going to cover you up
okay? I can’t let you go just yet. We’re going to talk and you have
to hear me out.”

In my mind I’m trying to reason with
him, act as if nothing is really happening so that he doesn’t lose
his shit. I’m still confused but I’m putting it together and I’m
starting to understand that my dad is involved in Angels,
deep.

“
Mace I loved your mother.
I did. That woman stole my heart the first time I saw her. She was
beautiful, independent, and she was a pretty funny woman. I feel in
love with her so so many years ago.”

Dad looks sad, lost in memory. If I
weren’t in such a complete panic state I imagine I would feel sorry
for him, or try to help but I’m scared for my life right now. I
don’t know the whole story but it looks like he’s starting from the
beginning.

“
I knew Doc, did you know
that?” He isn’t looking for me to answer, he doesn’t even look
directly at me while he continues talking. “Yes, I knew him through
your mother. He was always lingering around her in the beginning.
He looked at her like I did but I knew he was out of her league. He
was a monster, lived his life like one. Hem, God that stupid boy,
took an immediate liking to him. I should have seen the nightmare
unfolding before me. Then I found out your mother and I were going
to have a baby. You were coming to me, on your way. I fell in love
with the idea of having a child. I worked hard, Mace I swear to you
I did. I led a life that people would be proud of. I lived a life
that people should have envied, including that brother of yours.
Instead Mace, he challenged me at every turn. He is so bull headed.
When he was 15, your mother told me that Doc wanted him, wanted to
take him from us and give him a chance to make something of
himself. I was out of my mind with anger. I raised him since he was
a child and I had given that son of a bitch everything but he
wanted Doc. Your mother wanted him to have Doc over me. It fucked
me up Mace, I started second guessing everything about my life.
Every damn decision I had made in regards to you even. You were
only five when my whole began to unravel.”

He’s staring over me, into the nasty
wall behind me. He’s looking at the bloodstains, I’m guessing they
belong to Cherry and his face is getting hard and his jaw is
starting to tick. Thinking quickly I try to interrupt his
thought.

“
Daddy? Why are you
here?”

“
Damn it Mace, you can’t
call me that. My world broke the day I found out that you can no
longer call me that. The night you were called to a family dinner
to hear of your mother and her illness do you remember that? Months
ago it has been.”

“
I do. I remember.” That
was the day my world tumbled as well.

“
Your mother that morning
had found out she was really dying. She told me how she loved me. I
believe she did, Mace. I truly do. I always knew I wasn’t what she
wanted though, but she gave me her love, her life. She confessed
something to me that morning. I guess she was trying to set her
life honest before she died I suppose. She told me truths that I
never thought possible. She was in love with another man early in
our marriage. She loved trash. You were the product of their love,
not the love she and I had. It gutted me, Mace. I raised you, loved
you, and protected you. I was your father in all aspects. Except
really, you were never mine. You’re not my daughter.”

I gasp. I shake. Then I screamed.
“WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I AM YOURS! I AM YOURS!”

He leaned down, moving the blanket up
to my neck since my screaming and movement had caused it to slide
down my chest. Quietly he continues.

“
Mace no. Your mother, the
love of my life, had an affair. Although she confessed that it was
a mistake and she always loved me, she felt I was hurting a young
Hem and she sought comfort in someone who could understand her
fear. She thought someone else out there knew better for him.
Someone more like his own father. So that’s when her affair started
with Doc.”

My eyes roll to the back of my head.
Mom. Oh God. Her words telling me about evil and how she loved my
dad. She wasn’t talking about Warren, she was talking about Doc. I
remember now how many times I had seen that man around town, around
our house, and around Hem. He was trying to protect Hem, from
Warren.

“
Dadd….”

“
NO! DO NOT CALL ME THAT!
I am not your father. Are you not fuckin’ listening to me? She had
an affair, you are the product of her love for HIM. He was a dirty,
lying, thief. God, he had been with every slut in town and yet she
willingly went to him over me. That’s when I knew.”

Oh God. He looks deadly. His face no
longer shows gentleness for me. He isn’t looking at me the way he
always had. The lump in my throat is making it hard to breath. He’s
going to kill me. I can see his absolution for my mother, his
revenge for Doc is on me.

“
You were always my Dad.”
This is true. I never once ever thought any different. “You were
always my Dad.” I repeat, hoping that both he and I believe these
words.

His gentleness is slowly coming back
with my words. I continue to look in his eyes. His eyes are the
same as mine, loaded with unshed tears that will break at any
second. He puts his head down and sighs heavily. “You were…. always
my dad.” More is coming, I feel this.

“
It isn’t over Sweet Pea.
I have more to tell you.”

Daddy’s endearment for me drags me
over edge and I expel all the tears that were rising. They fall
down my cheeks and onto my temple. I wince because I can feel them
sitting in my wounds again. Immediately Warren grabs a cloth and
dabs each wound, cleaning it best he can.

“
Sweet Pea, once your
mother told me of her sickness, then confessed to her affair and
that you weren’t really mine my world went dim. I made deals with
devils, baby. I intend to live out what I promised them I would.
But you’re going back, Mace. No more harm will come to you as long
as I get what I want. Greyson is no longer needed, he was at first.
Switch wanted Hem dead that was no secret. Once your mother told me
her story though, I wanted to hurt her. I did but God knows I
couldn’t. I loved her, still. I vowed to myself that I would get
revenge on Doc though. He is already dead. Even though you are his
blood you are still the beautiful woman I raised and I just can’t
bring myself to hurt you. I hate Hem, he is who will get my
vengeance.”

“
No no no no Daddy,
please. I love Hem, please don’t take him from me. I won’t say a
word about this I swear. Please! You are my father, all my life
you’ve been my father. PLEASE don’t hurt Hem. You know, you know
how much he means to me.”

He moves to me again and wipes more
tears with the back of his hand. How the hell can someone look so
utterly remorseful for hurting me be so willing to gut me with
another loss. Hem won’t go down without a fight, I know this. No
matter what happens, Hem will fight until death to protect Sadey
and the baby… and me.

Without thinking I start to negotiate
for Hem’s life. “Take me. Kill me, give me to Greyson. If you can’t
do it, let him.” I’m pleading with him but he’s not listening to
me.

“
This is going to happen.
I promise you. Come to terms, my Sweet Pea. Life as you have always
known it is over. Neil loves you, and if I’m honest and I had to
pick a man to love you the way I loved your mother, it would be
Neil. Once Hem is handled, I expect my threats against the others
will disband this chapter, essentially setting Neil free from that
life and giving him more opportunities to live clean. Have his
children, love him, and be faithful to him. He loves you, I know
it. I always saw it, even when he was just a kid and he lingered
around our house all those years. He always had such a soft spot
for my sweet little girl.”

Wait! “Mom’s bruises. I saw them! You
hurt her before she died? Daddy, I lied to you that day and I had
talked to her. She had bruising on her neck and that nurse lied to
me, didn’t she?”

His face turns to stone
and the pupils in his eyes reflect the evil I never saw from him.
“No, I
never
touched her. I wanted her to die in peace, without knowing
what I was putting in play. Greyson hated you so much, he wanted to
hurt your mother for bringing you into this world. When I found
out, I beat him again after Hem and Shame had their turn. He’s
filth.”

I remember now that Hem was at
Greyson’s house about that time and what he had found. “The
pictures. Hem found pictures at Greyson’s. Pictures of you both
with Hood. Guess this explains it. You were planning this for so
long, weren’t you?” All this realization hits me at once. Dad was
in deep with Angels for a long time extracting his plans against
Hem. I shake a bit inside, he has to be well vested in this and
even better prepared after all this time in planning.

“
That fucker wanted
insurance.” He kicks and unconscious Greyson again. “He had someone
snap some photos and he tried to blackmail me for more money. He
got a solid beating for that one as well. I had heard from a local
that he hired them to do it. I went behind him and paid the local
to keep quiet about everything, paid him every cent that Greyson
was trying to extort from me.”

I hear and see him rear back and kick
Greyson again and again, it had to have been in the face. I heard
the bones, blood splatter, and then Greyson’s horrid moans as he
wakes. I want to vomit but I have so much left to try to mend,
protecting those I love.

He changes thought process again.
“This fucking ANIMAL hurt her when I wasn’t there to protect her.”
He is lost in thought about Mom again. “Telling her my plans, my
works with ending Switch so I can step in and do this completely.
Fucking animal touched my wife, my dying wife. I’m worthless Mace,
I’m evil. Not women, never fuckin’ women! You do not hurt innocent
women. God, if that was the only thing Hood and I agreed on, it was
that. Grey had his day with Cherry, sick bastard took that while I
was on a ride with some of the boys. I wasn’t heartbroken over the
girl and what he had done to her but still, she was a woman and he
fucked her up good. I wasn’t done with him then yet, still needed
him then. I don’t need him anymore. He is to be fed to the wolves
soon. To be put down like the animal that he is.”