House Divided (11 page)

Kendra rolled her eyes. “What he means is
that they would have hated me had they known we were seeing each other.”

“Mommy, grammy and grandpop don’t hate
you.”

“Of course not, honey.”

Kendra looked at Benjamin. This probably
wasn’t the best conversation to have in front of a five-year-old. Kendra and
Benjamin must have agreed.

“Maybe we can talk about how we got
together later,” Kendra said.

“Good idea,” Benjamin agreed.

Benjamin turned my way again. “Ellie, can
I just say upfront I owe you a huge apology.”

“It’s really not necessary. It was a long
time ago.” I felt like I kept saying that.

“For some of us, it’s not that long ago.”

“I keep hearing that.”

Benjamin smiled.

The rest of the dinner conversation was
much more pleasant, it mostly centered on puppies. The mysteries were still not
solved, but I guess they could wait. Besides, puppies were much more
interesting. I wondered if Caroline would be successful in convincing her
parents to get her one for Christmas. It sounded like she had her work cut out
for her.

I helped Kendra clean up while Benjamin
played Candy Land with Caroline. I was happy to get to spend some time alone
with her. I really liked her.

“So, Kendra, I have to ask, what grand
pageant did you win to overcome your Auburn heritage?”

She laughed heartily. “You wouldn’t catch
me dead in a pageant.”

I almost dropped the plate I was rinsing
in the sink. “So, you broke rules one
and
two?”

She stopped laughing and looked sincerely
at me. “I can’t stand those rules.”

“Yeah, me too,” I said quietly.

“I bet you can’t.”

“Well, at least your last name isn’t
Eaton.”

She looked at me like I should be pitied.
“Can I tell you something, Ellie?”

“Sure.”

We both dried our hands off and she led me
to a stool around her island. I sat down and she took the stool next to me. She
looked at me thoughtfully. “Ellie, when I met Brady …”

So much for not thinking about him
tonight.

“… he surprised me. I thought, ‘here’s a
guy that should be on top of the world.’ He was a top-ranked athlete and he was
dating Miss Alabama.”

I cringed at the mention of Amber. 

“Yeah, I feel the same way about her,”
Kendra said.

“I knew I liked you,” I said with a smile.

She smiled wide and told me the feeling
was mutual. “But you know what, Ellie? He was a pretty melancholy guy, except
for when he talked about a girl he used to know with grey eyes.”

“He would talk about me?”

“Uh huh.”

“What would he say?”

“Oh random things like when I wore my Auburn gear, he would say, ‘Ellie would love that.’ Or when a song you liked came on the
radio he would mention it. But it wasn’t until Amber showed her truest colors
that he told me how he really felt about you, at least in words. But he didn’t
have to tell me; I could see it in his eyes the whole time I knew him, whenever
he talked about you.”

My emotions got the better of me and a
tear escaped. I tried to quickly wipe it away. I didn’t want to hear things
like this. It was confusing.

She patted my hand. “Then his leg broke,
and I thought during my first appointment with him after the accident I would find
a broken man that was even more sullen than before. He surprised me. He was the
happiest I had ever seen him. He looked like the weight of the world had been
lifted off his shoulders. But I’ve never seen light in his eyes until yesterday
when he dropped Caroline off.”

“Well, he loves Caroline.”

“Oh, I know you’re smarter than that,
Ellie. Yes, he loves Caroline, and he’s the best uncle ever, but Ellie, you
have to know how he feels about you.”

“Kendra, I’m sure Brady has fond memories
of me, but that’s as far as it goes.”

“Ellie, I know you don’t believe that.”

“Why would I believe anything else? Have
you ever loved someone that has left you and acted like you’ve never existed?
Not only that, you have to see them with someone else? Someone that they said
they could never have feelings for? He was engaged to her, Kendra! So please
tell me why I should believe anything different.” I didn’t mean to get so
upset. I hardly knew this woman and was a guest in her home, and now I was
raising my voice and crying. It was very unladylike and rude. I was raised
better than that. I looked into her wide eyes. “I’m so sorry. I should probably
just go home now.”

She surprised me by getting up and putting
her arms around me. That only made me cry harder.

“It’s ok, Ellie. You have every right to
be upset.”

“It was a long time ago. Why can’t I just
get over him?” I didn’t expect her to answer that. It was just one of those
unanswerable questions.

She sat back down and handed me a tissue.
I thanked her.

“Maybe you’re not meant to,” she replied.

I smiled sadly as I dabbed my face.
“Spinsterhood it is then.”

She smiled kindly, but shook her head no.
“You know, I have a brother-in-law that would be happy to solve that issue.”

“Oh, Kendra, don’t you see, Brady and I
can never be together.”

“Why? Because he was forced to make a
terrible decision when he was a kid?”

I raised my eyebrow. “He was forced to get
engaged?”

“Maybe forced is a bad word, but
definitely coerced. You have no idea the amount of pressure his parents, and
especially his mother, placed on him, and Amber was extremely manipulative.
Ellie, he didn’t love her.”

“None of this makes sense. And even if it
did, we still can’t be together. His parents hate me. Did you see how they
looked at me today?”

“Yes, but if you get back together, I’ll
no longer be the least favorite.”

I laughed, like really laughed. She joined
me.

Benjamin walked in as our laughter was
dying down. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

“Oh nothing, I was just trying to get
Ellie to sacrifice herself so I would no longer be the black sheep in your
family,” Kendra responded.

Benjamin wrapped his arms around Kendra
from behind. “My parents like you.”

She rolled her eyes.

I really liked her.

Caroline joined us, clad in bright purple
footsy pajamas. She was seriously adorable. She came right up to me, and I
picked her right up and placed her on my lap.

“Will you read me a story and tuck me into
bed?” she asked me.

“I would love to.” I looked at her parents
to make sure that was ok and that I wasn’t stepping on any toes. They both
smiled and nodded.

I let Caroline lead me to her room. It
looked like a Caroline room: loud, bright and fun. She had bunk beds with zebra-striped
comforters, and her room was painted a bright pink, except for one wall, which
was painted with chalkboard paint. That wall looked like it got plenty of use.
There were several drawn pictures, many of which had puppies in them. I
couldn’t help but grin. She handed me three books, all of which I was very
familiar with:
Aunt
Calliope and Jane in Paris
,
Aunt Calliope
and Jane in Rome
, and my latest,
Aunt Calliope and Jane in London
.

We started in Paris and ended in London.
I loved snuggling with her on her bed and reading to her. Seeing her smile and
hearing her laugh at something I created was also pretty amazing.

“How come Aunt Calliope wouldn’t let Jane
take the crown the Queen wanted to give her for saving the castle?” she asked
as soon as I closed the book.

“Well, sugar, Aunt Calliope wanted Jane to
know that she didn’t need a crown to make her feel special, because Jane is
special just because of who she is. See, sugar, it’s what’s inside of us that
counts most.”

She smiled at my response and then knelt
down to say her prayers. I tried hard not to giggle as she prayed for puppies
and babies, but then she prayed that her Uncle Brady and I would be boyfriend
and girlfriend, because that would make her so happy.
What was I going to do
with this girl?

She wrapped her tiny arms around me, and I
hugged her tightly back. I tucked her in and kissed her forehead. “Goodnight,
Caroline.”

“Goodnight, Miss Ellie.”

“Wait!” she called out before I could turn
off the lights.

I paused.

“Would you come to show and tell and read
to my class?”

“I would love to.”

“Ooooo, I can’t wait to tell my friends
tomorrow.”

“Ok, sugar, sweet dreams.” I seriously
loved that girl. And to think, I could have been her aunt.

I spent a couple more hours with Kendra
and Benjamin. With Caroline fast asleep, I finally got to hear how they got together.
It definitely wasn’t love at first sight. She found him arrogant, and he found
her obnoxious, but you could tell they had chemistry. They kept their
relationship secret, even from Brady, for several months, and they only
revealed it after they were engaged, and after Amber left Brady. I guess that
helped soften the blow. The Jacksons weren’t as keen on beauty queens now that
two had left their sons. It also helped that Kendra was essential in Brady’s
recovery. I guess it took some convincing, but his parents gave their blessing.

I didn’t say anything, but I kept thinking
how ridiculous his parents were. Kendra was terrific, and you could tell she
loved Benjamin. Isn’t that what should matter? Who cares where she went to
school or if she had won a beauty pageant? It confirmed to me that Brady and I
could never be together. If it took that much convincing for a non-Eaton, I’d
never have a chance. How could you be with someone when their parents despise
you? We tried that once, and it turned out very badly.

I lay in bed that night, thinking about
everything Kendra told me about Brady. I can’t tell you how confusing it all
was to me. The Brady I knew wouldn’t have let anyone force or coerce him. She
alluded to Brady still loving me, but if that were true, why didn’t he ever
come after me, especially after his daddy got better? I just didn’t understand.
I just hoped she was wrong about me not being meant to get over him, because being
with him seemed like an impossibility, no matter how much I wanted to be with
him.

I was up and at ‘em early the next morning.
I was anxious to get to the hospital. As I dressed, I was reminded I needed
more clothing. I decided I would stop by the Summit on my way back to the house
and add to my wardrobe.  I walked down the stairs to the smell of freshly-baked
banana nut muffins. Oh how I had missed Doris over the weekend. When I entered
the kitchen, there was already a plate with my name on it, with muffins and
fresh fruit. I thanked Doris profusely.

It took longer than I liked to get to the
hospital, but I made it thirty minutes before they came in to prep her.
Thankfully they didn’t need to put her under, but they did have to prep her
groin area and numb it, and she was none too happy about it. The nurses seemed
to be used to it and they took it in stride. The doctor came in before they
wheeled her to the Cath Lab where they would do the procedure. “The procedure
should take about an hour, barring any complications,” he informed us.

The complication comment didn’t sit well
with me. “Complications?”

He smiled warmly. “I don’t expect any. Ms.
Eaton is in great shape for a woman her age.”

My aunt didn’t take too kindly to that
reference, and she threw him such a dirty look. Thankfully she refrained from
any commentary. I looked at her and winked. She looked great for a woman years
younger than her, and she knew it.

But the good doctor didn’t miss the look
of loathing. He wrung his hands and looked at me. “We’ll send someone to get
you as soon as your aunt’s in the recovery room.”

I managed a small smile. I got up and
walked toward my aunt, who suddenly looked small and frail. I kissed her cheek
and tried to hold back the tears before they wheeled her out. “I love you, Aunt
Lu,” I whispered.

She looked up at me with her brown doe-like
eyes and squeezed my hand. “I love you more than air, Ella Lu.”

I watched them wheel her away. I suddenly
felt very alone as I walked out to the waiting room, but I had a surprise
waiting for me there. Let’s just say I didn’t feel alone anymore, but the
person waiting for me was the one person I needed to avoid. He was standing
there, holding two cups of coffee, looking more handsome than I had ever seen
him in his dark suit and red tie. And he was wearing a grin that said, “How can
you resist me?” I couldn’t, and that was my problem.

He quickly walked over to me.

“What are you doing here, Brady Jackson?”

His sweet smile was out in all of its
glory. “If my momma were going into surgery, I wouldn’t want to be alone.”

I should have told him to leave, but his
sincerity touched me and he was right, after all. I didn’t want to be alone, and
if I could have anybody with me, it would be him. I knew it was wrong, and it
could never go anywhere, but I needed him this morning.

“Thank you.”

He motioned for me to sit down and handed
me a coffee. I wrinkled my nose a little. I hated coffee, but I didn’t want to
be rude. He chuckled and leaned in close. “It’s hot chocolate.”

“You remembered?”

He tugged on my hair with his now-free
hand. “I think it may surprise you what I remember.”

I suddenly felt very warm. I took a drink
of hot chocolate before I did something that would get me into trouble. “So how
did you know what time to be here, and don’t you have a job?”

He raised his eyebrows. “Kendra called and
told me, and Benjamin has things covered at the bank. By the way, Kendra really
likes you.”

“I like her too, and your brother, and of
course Caroline.”

He smiled that smile I loved too much.
“Speaking of Caroline, she wanted me to give you this.” He reached into his
pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper and handed it to me.

I took it and unfolded it. She had drawn a
picture of what looked like me reading her a book on her bed, and there was a
puppy on the bed. I smiled up at Brady. “I think someone needs to get her a
puppy.”

He laughed quietly. “Benjamin said that
she talked of nothing but you this morning, and how she’s bringing you for show
and tell. I told him I was offended. She’s never wanted to take me to show and
tell.”

I raised my left eyebrow at him. “And what
would you show and tell?”

He leaned in dangerously close to me. “There
are some things I would like to show and tell
you
,” he whispered in my
ear.

I blushed deeply. “And what would that
be?” I whispered back.

He touched my cheek with his palm. “I plan
to show and tell you later.”

I sat back and drank more. I shouldn’t be
flirting with Brady Jackson, especially in the hospital waiting room while my
aunt was having her procedure. We made small talk after that. I tried to keep
it light, even though Brady was making it difficult; he was persistent. I had a
feeling if I would have let him, he would have pulled me on his lap and kissed
me until I forgot I was an Eaton again. At least he made the hour pass quickly.
It really was nice to have someone there with me.

The hour passed, and then it was an hour
and a half, and still no one had come back to get me. I was getting worried. I
decided to ask the nurse at the nurses’ station why it was taking so long; she
was not helpful at all. “Someone will be with you in a moment,” she said
lazily.

What did that mean? I went back to where
Brady was sitting, but by now I was mildly panicking. I couldn’t sit back down.
I began to pace. Brady got up and walked with me. He reached down and held my
hand. My first instinct was to pull away, but it had a calming effect. He kept
trying to be reassuring, but I had a bad feeling.

Finally a nurse came out and called my
name. I walked toward her with Brady in tow. She led us into a private area.
That was not a good sign. I squeezed Brady’s hand, and he responded by letting
go and putting his arm around me and pulling me close. I looked up at him. I
saw the concern in his eyes too. I started to shake a little. I wasn’t ready to
lose her. I felt like I couldn’t breathe.

She didn’t stand on ceremony once we
entered the room. “Ms. Eaton, there was a complication with the second artery
when we began to inflate it. We had to rush your aunt into emergency bypass
surgery.”

“Is she ok?” my voice cracked. 

She didn’t really answer. “The bypass
surgery will take a few hours, someone will come out and notify you when she’s
in recovery.” And just like that she turned to leave, but just as she opened
the door, she turned back to us. “Feel free to take as much time in here as
needed.”

The tears came as soon as she left. Brady
looked down at me and he pulled me close and wrapped me up in his arms. I
didn’t pull away, instead I held on for dear life. “Brady, I can’t lose her,
she’s all I have,” I said through my sobbing.

“Ellie, don’t think like that. I don’t
know your aunt that well, but from what I do know, she’ll come through
fighting.” He pulled back a little and tipped my chin up. “And Ellie, you’re
not alone.”

I didn’t argue, I just rested my head
against his now tear-stained shirt and tie. Brady began to rub my neck and
back. I knew this wasn’t an appropriate time to think about it, but I felt like
I had come home, like this was right where I belonged. I cried more because I
knew this was where I belonged. Every fiber of my being told me that, but I
knew it could never happen. I held on for longer than I should have, but I
needed him and, even more, I wanted him. I let go reluctantly. He held on even
longer, and I just let him.

When he finally decided to let go, I
stepped back. He reached up and wiped some of my tears away. The look on his
face was almost my undoing. I had to remind myself I was in an emotional state
and not to do anything that would have lasting repercussions, like falling
right back into his arms and telling him how much I loved him. I had to look
down; I had seen that look before in his eyes. While looking down, I noticed to
my embarrassment that I left a make-up stain on his white shirt.

“Brady, I’m sorry, I stained your white
shirt.” I reached into my bag to retrieve a wipe. I know it sounds weird that a
single woman with no children carries baby wipes in her purse, but those things
are little miracle stain removers.

Brady grabbed my hand gently and pulled it
up toward his face. “Ellie, I don’t care about my shirt. Besides, I’ve missed
your make-up stains on them.” He kissed my palm.

I really wished he would quit being so
Brady. “Brady, I think maybe we should go back to the waiting room now.”

He winked. “Ok.” But he didn’t let go of
my hand.

As soon as he led me out of the room, I
excused myself quickly and walked to the ladies room. While in there, I took
several deep breaths and said a silent prayer for my aunt. I begged God not to
take her from me. I looked in the mirror; thankfully I didn’t have raccoon
eyes. I touched up my make-up for Aunt Lu, and I had to smile to myself while
doing it. I could hear her voice in my head telling me to pull myself together.
I wondered what she would think of Brady being here with me. A week ago, I
would have thought I knew the answer to that, but now I wasn’t sure at all.

I walked back into the waiting room, and
Brady rose like the gentleman he always was. He smiled at me warmly, and I
couldn’t help but smile back. As I sat down next to him, he immediately picked
up my hand. Again, I knew I shouldn’t be allowing it. I knew I was giving him
the wrong idea. I knew he wanted me back, and I wanted that too, but I knew it
could never work out. I was being selfish today, though, because I needed him
and his comfort.

“Brady, thank you.”

He looked at me slyly. “For what?”

“For letting me stain your shirt.”

He tugged on my hair and gave me that
smile of his. “Anytime, Ellie.”

We didn’t say anything for a while. I just
kept looking at the clock on the wall that seemed to be frozen. I tried reading
magazines and responding to emails on my phone, but I couldn’t concentrate. I
was sick with worry.

“Do you want me to get you something to
eat?” Brady offered.

“I couldn’t eat anything right now, thank
you though. But please, if you’re hungry go get something. I feel terrible
you’re wasting your day here with me.”

“Are you kidding me? This is the best day
I’ve had in a long time.”

“You’re such a liar, Brady Jackson.”

He dropped my hand and ran his fingers
through my hair and stroked my cheek. “I’m sorry your aunt isn’t well, but
Ellie, spending a day with you all to myself, even if it’s in a hospital, is
more than I could ask for.”

I didn’t know how to respond. I knew what
I wanted to say. I wanted to tell him I loved him and that spending all my days
with him was all I ever wanted, but I couldn’t because he was who he was and I
was who I was.

“Brady …”

“Ellie …”

“Can I ask you a question?” I know that
was a totally lame response. I could tell by the look in his eyes he thought so
too, but he responded kindly which made me feel worse.

“You can ask me anything, Ellie.”

“Benjamin mentioned last night that my
aunt was going to remove her accounts from your bank. Do you know what made her
change her mind, and why does my aunt have yours and Benjamin’s names on her
Christmas list?”

“That’s two questions Ellie,” he teased.

“Well, I have a feeling they’re related.”