Household Saints
Authors: Francine Prose
A Novel
Francine Prose
For Howie
Lord of all pots and pans and things,
Since I’ve not time to be a saint
By doing lovely things
Or watching late with Thee
Or dreaming in the dawn light
Or storming heaven’s gates
Make me a saint by getting
Meals and washing up the plates.
“Kitchen Prayer”
FROM A HOLY CARD SOLD
AT THE SHRINE OF THE VIRGIN,
KNOCK, IRELAND
Sausage and Pinochle
I
T HAPPENED BY THE
grace of God that Joseph Santangelo won his wife in a card game. This fateful game of pinochle took place in the back room of Santangelo’s Sausage Shop, on Mulberry Street, in New York City, on the last night of the record-breaking heat wave of September 1949.
That summer, each day dawned hotter than the day before, and the nights were worse than the days. All night, pregnant women draped wet washcloths over their faces, begged the Madonna for a good night’s sleep, and thought how lucky Mary was that her baby was born in December. Children, three and four to a bed, squirmed to escape each other’s sweaty skin until their fathers’ curses hissed through the dark and they dozed off only to wake, moments later, stuck together like jelly apples.
Downstairs, the streets belonged to the young men who gathered on the corners, smoking, tapping their feet as if the sidewalk were too hot for them to stand still, and especially to the sort of old people who claimed they never slept anyway. From the doorsteps and fire escapes, they kept watch through the humid night—grandmothers cooing like pigeons and picking their black cotton stockings, grandfathers with their eyes shut, their chairs tipped back, dreaming out loud of that legendary summer in the old country when all the grapes shriveled on the vine, when the trout boiled alive in Lake Maggiore and floated belly up so that the whole lake shone in the moonlight like this: And here the old men would reach in their pockets for a nickel or a shiny dime.
This summer, they said, was a hundred times worse. Compared to Mulberry Street, Lake Maggiore smelled like a rose garden. At this, their wives nodded, even the ones who could usually be counted on to remember another time, in another place, when everything was bigger and better and more extreme.
Each morning, the papers ran photos of pretty girls in bathing suits frying eggs on midtown sidewalks. Each morning, some desperate mother asked her children: If I cooked on the pavement, would you eat? But her grumpy children only shook their heads, and even the best eaters would touch nothing but a slice of melon, a glass of milk, a peach. By noon, the bakeries were like steam baths, the bread like hot towels. Frank Manzone, the vegetable man, took to burying his wilted spinach beneath the last fresh leaves and stuffing it into paper bags, quick, so the housewives wouldn’t see. The women knew that the spinach was wilted and bought it anyhow, because it was so hot that no one could stand to eat meat.
No one knew this better than Joseph Santangelo, the butcher, whose cash register hadn’t rung since early June. Beads of oily sweat collected on the sausage, and the beef began to shine with the delicate fluorescence of butterfly wings. Eventually Santangelo transferred his stock to the refrigerator room at the back of the store, and spent August alone in his shop. Tired of staring at the empty cases, he’d make quick trips to the meat locker, like dips into a cool pond.
Labor Day came, summer’s end, but the only thing that stopped was the air, which simply quit moving and would not budge no matter how the grandmothers fanned it with rolled-up newspaper and prayed to the Virgin for a breeze. Well into September, the temperature rose so steadily that even the young men got worried and repeated the solemn rumor that all this had something to do with the A-bomb. Among the old women, alarmists were predicting the end of the world: Hadn’t God promised the fire next time? What if He’d meant this low steady roasting? So saying, the women fell silent and, from the habits of a lifetime, waited for their husbands to tease them out of their fears.
“Lord, turn me over!” cried the husbands, as the martyr San Lorenzo was supposed to have screamed from his agony on the hot griddle. “Cook me on the other side!”
Nervous joking, because it was the kind of heat wave which made the most sensible people think about doom. Even Joseph Santangelo began to wonder how his life would change if it just got hotter and hotter, and no one ever bought sausage again.
The night that Joseph won his wife at pinochle was the final night of the feast of San Gennaro. But for the first time that anyone could remember, it was too hot to celebrate. All week, the cotton candy had refused to spin. Giant ice blocks melted into lukewarm puddles for the beer kegs. At the start of the feast, crowds gathered near the ferris wheel to see if its turning might stir up a breeze; but the rickety wheel revolved in slow motion, and up in the high cars children could be seen getting sick from swinging in the heat. One by one, the food stands closed for lack of business; among the first to go was the sausage concession run by Joseph Santangelo and his mother.
And so it happened that Joseph was free to play cards.
That night, every light in the sausage shop was blazing, and the smell of blood clung to the damp sawdust. Yet there was no meat, no sausage to be seen, and the cases had been empty for so long that the place had the ghostly air of a ruin—precipitously abandoned, unchanged. Except for the four men drinking and playing cards, it could have been the butcher shop at Pompeii.
Among the relics of this lost time was a growing collection of empty wine bottles. By ten o’clock, six bottles had circled the table and fallen, as if passed out, on the floor. By that time, the four players were approaching the same condition, but some were closer to it than others.
The soberest was Joseph Santangelo. A tight bantam rooster of a man, the youngest and strongest, he was physically best able to hold his liquor. Also he was the host, and like many experienced hosts, believed in staying sober enough to keep an eye on his property. This was no problem, for Joseph was one of those men who can drink twice as much as his friends and never get half as drunk. Consequently he had a reputation for being lucky at cards.
Across the table sat his regular partner, Frank “Midas” Manzone, so nicknamed because everything he touched turned to gold. His wife was the best cook on Mulberry Street, his daughters were as lovely as princesses, his sons had already captured every debating prize and sports trophy at St. Anthony’s. The wine he made in his cellar was not only the tastiest in Little Italy, but abundant enough for a full year of lunch and dinner, holiday feasts and nightly pinochle games. The day that it matured was a neighborhood holiday; shopkeepers were drunk by noon, and women turned out for the bargains. His vegetable stand, next door to the sausage shop, was a gold mine. His brother’s New Jersey farm grew cabbage in the midst of blizzards, and the housewives bought his spinach even in this heat wave. At cards, he was considered even luckier than Santangelo, for Frank Manzone could drink as much as he pleased, and somehow his card game improved with every drink.
Joseph and Frank poured their wine into glasses. Their opponents, Lino Falconetti and his son Nicky from Falconetti’s Radio Repair across the street, drank directly from the bottle. If for no other reason, it was an uneven match—but of course there were other reasons.
For Lino and Nicky came from an ill-starred line, a family history of Falconettis wiped out by locusts which alighted nowhere else, Falconettis decimated by plagues which spread no further than their own front yards. Except for a few “good” years, when the wartime hunger for overseas news had made people need their radios like food, Lino’s business had never done more than survive. Now, Lino saw the rising spectre of television (for which he had no talent) as yet another example of Falconetti luck—the same malevolent destiny which had wrecked his family life. His wife had died young, of diphtheria, a baby disease from which the two babies recovered. As the father of an infant daughter, Lino had prepared himself to defend her honor; seventeen years later, his Catherine was such a runt, such a smart aleck that her honor had never been challenged. And Nicky, his pinochle partner, his only son and heir? Nearsighted, overweight, pale, Nicky was not exactly slow, but his mind seemed to wander off like a toddler stumbling away from its mama in the park, and the simplest details slipped through his grasp like goldfish through the child’s cupped hands.
At cards, the Falconettis lost so consistently that they had learned to bring no more than the few dollars they could ill afford to lose. When this was gone, the game ended, despite Lino’s attempts to prolong it by swearing on his sainted wife’s soul and scribbling huge IOUs which neither Santangelo nor Manzone would accept—except perhaps as a sign that it was time to quit and go home.
But on that September night, it was too hot to quit. No one had the strength to stand up. The game went on as seven, then eight empty bottles fell beneath the table. Even Santangelo was having trouble telling jacks from kings, and everyone bid out of turn. The scorekeeping broke down, which was just as well, because the Falconettis had long since lost their money, and the betting had gone wild.
Frank Manzone put up four pounds of wilted spinach and won a newly reconditioned Stromberg-Carlson from Nicky. When at last Lino produced a coral rosary and swore, with tears in his eyes, that it had come from his sainted wife on her deathbed, Frank Manzone took a deep breath and somehow found the strength to say, “Okay, gentlemen, once more around from me and we call it a night.”
It was during the final round that Joseph Santangelo took one look at his cards and bet the North Pole.
“The North Pole?” said Lino Falconetti. “Since when can you bet the North Pole?”
“Since right here behind me,” said Joseph.
Rocking back in his chair, Joseph reached over, shot the bolt on the refrigerator room door and flung it open wide.
“Jesus,” said Frank Manzone.
A cold blast hit the players like a punch in the face. They gasped, gulping the chilly air, and threw back their heads to let the sweat dry off their faces. Outside, the ferris wheel played music-box tarantellas, a vendor sang “zeppoli zeppoli” in a melancholy voice. But for the men in Santangelo’s shop, the world fell silent. For, like a punch in the face, the icy blast had taken them out of themselves and made them forget their daily cares. Though not as intense as a vision of Our Lady, or an evening in bed with Rita Hayworth, it was the closest they would come to ecstasy on that hot night.
Santangelo shut the door. Immediately the cool wind stopped blowing, and the humid air flowed in like water. Sweating again, the men stared toward the meat locker, their faces slack with longing and regret.
“Christ,” said Lino Falconetti. “Do that again.”
“Win it off me,” said Joseph.
“You’re on.”
“Not so fast, Falconetti. What’ll you put up to see it?”
“My life savings,” said Lino.
“Terrific,” said Santangelo.
“All right, listen. I’ll kick in the shop.” At this, Lino glanced at his son, but Nicky was still contemplating the meat locker with a lovesick gaze.
“Do me a favor,” said Joseph. “Keep the shop.”
Lino pulled a handkerchief from his hatband, mopped his face, then sighed and bowed his head as if in prayer.
“God help me,” he said. “Here’s what I’ll do. I’ll put up my daughter—my only daughter. I win this hand—you open that door and keep it open till I say quit. I lose—you can have my daughter, my beautiful daughter, Catherine Agnes Falconetti.”
“In that case, I’ll take the shop,” said Joseph, then caught himself. You could joke about a man’s business—but not about his daughter.
“Ha ha,” he said. “Just kidding. Sure I’ll take your daughter, Falconetti. What have I got to lose?”
Then very slowly, pleased and smug as a magician completing a trick, Joseph fanned his cards and smacked them onto the table.
Nicky Falconetti whistled.
“Mama,” said Frank Manzone.
“Am I seeing things?” said Lino. “Or is that the kings, queens, jacks, tens
and
nines of hearts?”
Joseph Santangelo smiled.
“Hearts is trump,” he said.
The next day was so humid that the copper wires stuck to Lino Falconetti’s fingers and came out in his hands like clumps of red hair. Lino cursed the wires, the radio, the weather and his many misfortunes, among them the fact that, after a lifetime of hard drinking, he still suffered the exquisite hangovers of a novice drunk. His eyes felt cottony, pressure clamped the bridge of his nose. All he knew was that he needed something and didn’t know what it was.
