Hunting Truth (19 page)

He shrugged before saying, “Well, I obviously
misjudged it. If it makes you so unhappy, I could always get rid I
suppose.”

I almost gasped at his nonchalance. “So
you think you can simply ‘get rid’ as you so callously put it, and
that will make everything alright?”

He frowned, “Well, yes.
If it’s a huge problem for you then yes,
I’ll just get rid. It’s beginning to cause problems in my
professional life anyway. Yes, actually it would be good for
someone to step into my shoes. Perhaps the old adage about mixing
business with pleasure is right. I can think of one or two who
might be interested in taking over from me. I won’t let this come
between us, Issy, and you shouldn’t either.”

I could hardly believe my ears.
Oh my God. Is he
seriously thinking that palming Ava off onto someone else will make
everything alright between us? Am I supposed to just forget about
her and pretend he’s not been cheating on me? Is that what he’d
want to do if we split—find me a replacement boyfriend?
With a heavy heart, I realized
that I didn’t really know him at all, not if he thought that I’d
find his thoughtlessness acceptable. I suddenly felt
cheap—disposable even. I almost laughed at my stupidity. I’d caught
myself several times, picturing myself with him in our mini-Dakota
apartment, all loved up and content. Well that dream had just
evaporated.

I set my glass down and jutted out my
chin.
I decided I’d walk
out of there with my dignity intact but first, I thought I should
set him straight.

“
Lucas, I have news for you.
If you think that I can just
forget about you and Ava then you are very much mistaken. This may
be my first real relationship but I believe in monogamy. I’m
appalled at your attitude towards Ava and even if I could forgive
you, I tell you now, I will not stand for a similar attitude
towards me. I’m not going to stand by, waiting for the day I become
an inconvenience and you decide to get rid of me . . . and the
final insult—finding someone to take me over. You are without doubt
the most arrogant, deluded man I’ve ever had the misfortune to
sleep with. So you may as well hang on to Ava if she’s stupid
enough to put up with your infidelity, but if it’s all the same
with you, I’ll find my own lover.”

I squared my shoulders and headed for the
door with as much dignity as I could muster.
Just as my hand closed over the door
handle, I felt his hand close over mine.
Fuck!
Just when I thought his silence meant I was going
to be able to simply walk away. I took a deep breath and let it out
in a rush, conveying my annoyance at being intercepted. I
considered attempting to force the handle and escape him but I knew
it was pointless to attempt that. He was too strong for me to be
able to force the door open against his wishes and, even if I
managed it, the security in that place was so tight that I knew I
wouldn’t be able to make it out of the building.

We stood there for what seemed an
age.
When I felt my
tense frame begin to sag and relax in acceptance of my inability to
escape him, he finally spoke. “Issy, I may be arrogant and deluded
but I honestly have no idea what you are talking about. There is
nothing going on between myself and Ava—not in the way you’re
thinking, anyway. She’s the manager of this place, that’s
all.”

“
I guess that’s what you would say when
you’re caught red handed. So tell me Lucas, why was she draped
possessively all over you?”

“
She was upset.
She’s having a difficult time here at the moment
and we’re friends.” I could hear the annoyance in his
voice.

I
’d given him the opportunity to tell me about their past
relationship and he’d chosen not to.
What else is he keeping from me?
I decided to show my hand. “You
used to be more than friends didn’t you? And now you’re just
friends . . . friends with benefits?”

“
I
’ve just told you there’s nothing going on between us,” he
snapped. I heard him take a sharp breath in and expected him to
continue speaking but he seemingly changed his mind. After a few
seconds, he continued in a much more relaxed tone. “Yes, Ava and I
have history. We had a D/s relationship.”

“
Ava was your sub?” I said, trying not to
form mental images of them together. I tried to decide whether I
believed him when he said they were now just friends but Lucas
interrupted my thoughts.

“
Yes. In fact she was my last. I let her
down badly.
I was her
Dominant and I couldn’t give her what she needed. It’s a Dominant’s
responsibility to give their submissive what it is they need.
That’s essential for a submissive to submit themselves fully and
for any D/s relationship to succeed. You embark upon a journey
together, initially finding out what each other needs and then,
providing those needs are compatible, it’s the Dominant’s role to
figure out how to advance the relationship successfully and safely.
I failed her. That was the reason I turned my back on the
scene.”

His voice had grown steadily quieter until
it was barely a whisper. He sounded so miserable. I knew that he
didn’t like failure, he was a successful alpha male after all, but
I sensed that it was more than that. He’d let Ava down. He’d failed
her as well as himself and that was what had hurt him most. I
suddenly needed to know why.

“
How did you fail her? Am I permitted to
ask what it was that you couldn
’t give her that she needed?” I whispered. I thought there
was a good chance he wouldn’t tell me—it was likely to be something
very intimately personal, perhaps a sexual act or fetish that he
wouldn’t or couldn’t perform.

I felt tension in the hand that covered mine
and, although that was the only part of his body in contact with
mine, I literally felt his whole body tense.

“
I couldn
’t dominate her in the way she needed,” he said,
eventually. I waited to see whether he was willing to elaborate. My
patience was rewarded when he continued, “She’s a masochist. She
craves pain as part of her submission. She longed to be restrained
and seriously whipped, flogged and caned amongst other things and
that’s something I just couldn’t do. I still can’t. I tried—for her
sake, but I felt like a lowlife afterwards. My style of dominance
is far gentler although the idea in principle appeals to me. But
when it comes down to it, actually inflicting physical pain on a
woman is something that I simply cannot do. So you see, Issy, there
is nothing sexual between us. Ava is one of the few people I can
call a friend. There is nothing more to it than that. She’s a very
tactile person and feels very comfortable around me. It’s not
something that I actively encourage but it happened naturally as
our relationship turned into a purely platonic one. If it’s a
problem for you then I’ll have a word with her.”

Something in his voice told me it was
painful for him to recount his issues with inflicting pain on
women. I thought it was an admirable quality in a man but I knew
that the world of D/s was a complex one and one I had little
knowledge of. Unexpectedly, I felt a rush of sympathy for him. I
turned my head in an effort to see his face. Immediately, his hand
loosed mine and he turned away. I didn’t even consider bolting
through the door. Instead, I turned and slipped my arms around him
from behind. I rested my cheek against his back and just held him,
not saying a word.

I replayed the conversation with Lucas in
my head. I couldn
’t
believe that I’d got it wrong again. Damn Scott for putting the
wrong idea in my mind, although I could see how he’d get the wrong
impression, what with Ava being so touchy feely. No wonder Lucas
had looked so confused.
Wait a second. If Lucas wasn’t talking about him
and Ava, what did he think I was going on about? What hasn’t he
told me? What do I need to be open-minded about?

I opened my mouth to ask him but I
didn
’t get chance
because a loud, insistent knock on the door startled us both. Lucas
turned and pulled away from me. He grasped the door handle and
pulled the door open. I noticed he was stony faced before my eyes
flicked to the man on the other side of the door. It was Carter. I
wondered what he was doing there but then reasoned he was either
staying close to Lucas or was following Scott. Lucas promptly
stepped outside and closed the door firmly behind him.

I heard Lucas tell Carter to follow him
and then it went quiet.
I debated whether to wait for him to return so that I could
ask him what he was hiding from me that required me to be
open-minded or whether to go back to Angel and Chad. I knew Angel
would probably be frantic by now, wondering what was going on.
Since I had no idea how long Lucas would be, I decided to return to
the reception area and put Angel’s mind at rest that I was
okay.

I opened the door and made my way back to
the exit. My heart sank when I saw that
the Not-So-Incredible Hulk was blocking it with
his massive frame. Intuition told me that I wasn’t going to be
allowed to leave—presumably on Lucas’ instructions. Indignation
flared inside me at the mere thought of it. I marched up to him and
demanded that he move out of my way and allow me to leave before I
called the cops. He didn’t even appear to register my request. He
just stood motionless and impassive. I looked around for the door
release button, fully intending to give it my best shot when I
heard a girlish giggle coming from somewhere behind me. Unless my
mind was playing tricks, it sounded like Angel.

I spun around and sure enough, there she
was.
I think my jaw hit
the floor when I saw her swinging to and fro, wearing just her
underwear, seemingly without a care in the world, on a swing that
I’d seen being put to a very different use by a couple when I’d
visited previously. Then I noticed poor Chad, looking distinctly
uncomfortable as he tried to coax her down, and saw Scott sitting
nearby in uncontrollable laugher. A small crowd had gathered and
was cheering and applauding her. I shook my head, wondering whether
I’d transgressed into some parallel universe. I mean, Angel! Meek,
introverted Angel . . . up there in her underwear, with spotlights
trained on her! I closed my eyes and shook my head again but when I
opened them, she was still there as large as life.

I found myself walking toward her,
absentmindedly wondering whether I should pinch
myself
—just to be sure I
wasn’t dreaming. As I neared, Chad saw me and relief flooded his
face. “Oh thank God! Issy, please help me get her out of here
before she decides to take any more clothes off!” he
begged.

“
What
’s gotten into her? Has she been drinking?” I asked,
failing to hide my smile as I watched her swinging away.

“
Scott told us what goes on in this place
over a drink or two
, but
she’s not had enough to make her behave like that. I don’t know
what’s gotten into her, Issy. She was so embarrassed when the big
guy told us to make ourselves at home when you and Lucas
disappeared and she saw what was going on all around her. Then, as
Scott explained the different relationships and that they were all
consensual and immensely pleasurable, she seemed to relax and
lighten up. That was fine, until this drag queen came up and asked
her if she wanted to dance.

“
The next minute, she was dancing with this
burlesque dancer and began removing her clothes. I don’t know what
came over her. Then Christie, the drag queen, lifted her up on the
swing and I can’t get her down. You’ve got to help me,
Issy.”

I smiled and put my arm around him.
“But look at her, Chad. Look
how happy she is. She’s not hurting herself or anyone else. Just
relax. If she starts removing her panties, I’ll help you—although I
can assure you that nobody in here will bat an eyelid. You’ve seen
what goes on. In here, you can be yourself and lose your
inhibitions. That’s all she’s doing. Let her be. She won’t come to
any harm.”

He turned to me, his face conveying his
disbelief.
“Come on,” I
said, tugging his arm. “You look like you need a drink.”

I took him over the bar and got us both a
beer. When I tried to pay, the barman waved my hand away saying
that Mr. Hunter would take care of it. We took our drinks over to
Scott, who looked very uncomfortable when I sat down next to him. I
didn
’t really want to
discuss Lucas and Ava and how Scott had gotten it wrong in front of
Chad so I did my usual trick of talking about the imminent tour. I
knew it was a safe topic of conversation and guaranteed to get the
guys’ attention. They were so keen to get on the road, and with
just one rehearsal at Lucas’ bar later that night, it was within
touching distance.

We were talking animatedly about the band
they were supporting and the venues they would visit when I saw
Lucas and the Hulk
advancing towards us. Lucas’ expression was murderous and
for some reason my mouth dried up instantly. But then Scott noticed
him and, even in the dim light, I could see the color drain out of
his face. I wondered fleetingly whether Lucas had worked out it was
Scott who’d put the idea in my head about him cheating on me with
Ava. I silently prayed that there wouldn’t be any trouble and we
could all go somewhere private to discuss it.