I Would Find a Girl Walking (26 page)

Read I Would Find a Girl Walking Online

Authors: Diana Montane,Kathy Kelly

BOOK: I Would Find a Girl Walking
5.36Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
While I was in the hospital for major surgery (I had part of a lung removed), he expressed concern for me.
September 9, 1985
 
Dear Kathy,
 
I received your two letters today. You better take care of yourself, cause we have a lot of work to do. Please take care of yourself for me Kat. While your in the hospital I will give you some time to rest. All you do is run, run, run every day.
See you heard from the prison here. Some mixup, huh? At least, they know that we were both aware of what happened, and I took the necessary measures here, and so did you. We won’t have any problems now, hopefully. But, you get better first okay? That’s more important Kat.
I am writing now to learn when my case goes in front of Gov. Bob Graham. I have to have an attorney from Daytona represent me on these 2 cases for clemency. Hope I get someone I know from there. That would help a lot Kat. But, I have to wait and see who Judge Foxman appoints for me.
Football season opened, so I have been watching football all weekend. I won this past weekend, and have another bet on tonight’s game. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
Wish I had a phone in my cell, cause I would call, and wish you well, and also talk to my cousin in New York.
Kat, you know I have been having dreams about Pennsylvania and my old girlfriend there.
Guess writing about my life has triggered my memory. It’s funny cause I have been asked by many news reporters, etc., to talk to them, and I have refused. But, you’re the only one I want to talk to. Besides, your friends of mine are my friends too. You know who I am talking about.
Well, this Thursday I will be 34. It seems like 54 to me. I would love to go to “Julian’s Rest.” on A1A in Ormond Beach for supper then go to 600 North for some dancing, or to “Troddus Shore Bar Lounge” and listen to the “Better Way.” That would make my night, or go to dinner with a young lady to the Hilton, and then where she wanted to go. But I will have to settle for a cup of coffee and a cigarette and one apple pie.
Guess I’ll close for now. For me—please get well, and take care of yourself. Don’t want anything to happen to you Kat. I will wait for a few days, then write to you again around Thursday morning and mail it Thursday night.
 
Yours truly,
Jerry
 
P.S. Get Well soon okay! I am listening more to WKTZ 96fm. It’s just like WWLV 95.5 in Daytona. Guess my taste is changing in music. But I like it.
September 12, 1985
 
Dear Kathy,
 
Hi Kat! Hope your feeling better. I have said a few prayers for you. Hope they helped. You take it easy at home, and get better. Don’t worry about coming up, till you feel much better. I just hope that it’s nothing serious, Kat.
I am waiting now for oral arguments in Tallahassee for my Clemency. It’s very nerve racking at this time, plus I am worried about you in the hospital. But I know you will come out with flying colors, Kat.
Today is my birthday. Guess I will make a cup of coffee, smoke a cigarette, and listen to the stereo. Got a beautiful card from my mom.
I will write more this weekend, you take it easy, and rest up, I want you to get better real soon. Be back later.
September 15, 1985
 
Sunday—
Well, what a change in the weather. Feels good though, Kat. I am used to this kind of weather.
How are you feeling? Back on your feet yet? Sure hope it was nothing serious.
Guess I will watch t.v. today. All football (NFL & college games). At least we yell at them, and get some steam let off.
It’s funny, but when I start to correspond with someone and that person gets sick, I worry about them. The only people who write me are my mom, my brother, Paul Crow and you Kat.
Have you ever listened to the stereo and a certain song comes on, and it starts you thinking about the past? Well, it happens to me every Saturday night from 7–12 pm when the Oldies come on. I find myself up in Pennsylvania with Yvonne. Never with Angela (retarded one.) I don’t know why, but it always happens with Yvonne, my Impala, and we are going to the store. It’s funny how that works, but it does. Plus, I usually find myself crying sometimes about it. I’ve tried to block it out, but it doesn’t work, Kat. You see, I didn’t have any flashes of Daytona, like I do with Pennsylvania.
Well, I have to do laundry now. Wish I had a washing machine but I have to do them by hand. I will finish this in the morning. Please take care of yourself for me.
Stano took up knitting, and claimed to worry about his health, as well as his mother’s and mine. Aside from the way he described each and every car he had ever owned in painstaking detail, and the condition in which he kept them, here he also described the way he kept his cell: “immaculate,” and “everything has a place.” That began in childhood, when young Gerald would throw fits if anything was “out of place” at home.
Monday, September 16 p.m.
 
Hi Kat! How are you feeling today?
 
You know, I hate when the guys start talking about my time—5–25 years and 3 Death Sentences. They don’t know when to back off. All I do is put on my headphones & stereo, and block them out. I refrain from talking about it with them cause of my temper, and, I would end up in a fight over it on the yard, and loose [
sic
] my privileges from 30–60 days. I don’t need that type of headace. Follow what I am saying?
They don’t seem to realize I am nothing to play with. I have other things to worry about than them and their mouths, like my mother’s health, my health, and you being in the hospital.
I am enjoying this cool weather we are having. I made an afghan for my bed and it looks nice. Have also made some hats and scarves for my family. I made them all by knitting. I have a pair of plastic size 8 needles. If you were to take a tour of where I stay here, you would see how I keep my cell. It’s immaculate every day. Everything has a place. That’s the way I was outside, and nobody can change it.
Well, I want to get this in the mail tonight. Sure hope your home, and taking it easy. Get well soon. Write, when you get a chance.
Yours truly,
Jerry
 
P.S. Get well soon Kat!
He sent me a “Get Well” card, trying to reinforce what he believed was a friendship—or, in his mind, even more—with me.
September 21, 1985
 
Dear Kathy,
 
Bet it feels good to get home. Sure wish I could be home for just 24 hrs, and have some good Italian cooking. Plus, go swimming in the pool and play my Hammond organ again.
They have fixed HBO for us, so we can watch the Holmes vs. Spinks fight tonight. Should be real good to. Everyone is placing bets but I haven’t placed anything on it. Don’t think I will either.
My uncle just got out of the hospital in Penn. He lives by himself, and has never told anybody he is a diabetic. So, I was upset about that, when I heard it. If I knew he was like that, I would have stayed up there. Besides, he can’t drive now, and he has a new Caddy, and I think the world of him. He reminds me of my grandfather who died.
I am waiting for that clipping from you that your sister has. My parents saw it Wednesday on the “Today Show,” and nearly went through the ceiling. It was the name “Eugene Stano” that did it, cause that is my father’s first name. He is really furious, and wants it changed immediately. I have to agree with him cause of the names.
They are coming up tomorrow and I just can’t see my father now. Mad at the world, and me. He will never change, Kathy. His attitude is why my mother is sick. Mom told me if she could get her hands on a gun, she would kill my father, then herself. It’s all due to the way my father is. I would like to know what makes him like that. Plus, he always likes to be on the run, away from the house. Paul can verify what I mean about him. But I guess you can’t change him now.
I would like to see my brother, but he won’t come up. I asked a friend if he would talk to my brother and explain the situation to him. How I am waiting for clemency and then comes a warrant. I am praying that it comes after the first of the year. I have made a list of everything I have (inventory), cause they also inventory my stuff. I like to be double sure of everything Kathy.
Before I forget, the card I am sending you is a Get Well card. It’s nothing fancy, just something I thought would cheer you up.
Guess I will close for now, please write when you get a chance, and I am waiting for our interview.
 
Respectfully,
Jerry
September 26, 1985
 
Kathy,
 
I am happy to hear that you have gone back to work. You must have a lot of paperwork to catch up on. Hope you got your card alright.
In my letter of Aug. 29, I thought I was pretty well-versed, when I told you all of the things that led up to the killings. But, it seems I must have been pretty lax on some stuff. So, I will have to recall again the evening, even though it is really painful to do so.
Kat, I am working with a very painful right ear. I have an inner and outer ear infection. They have me on ampicillin, Sudafed and ear drops. I can barely hear out of it. It has kept me up for the past 3 nights. Sure hope this medication works, cause it is driving me crazy.
Well, I was never in the habit of picking up hitchhikers. The girls looked pretty good (not Miss America material). It was just one of those on-the-spur-of-the-moment things. I couldn’t stand to see the two of them walking. So, I gave them a ride.
After they got in, we were talking awhile. They asked where I was from, and I told them. Besides, I had been in the car and offered them each one. Well, to the best recall, they didn’t want to get out, cause of the music and free beer.
The subject did turn to sex after a while. You see, the one girl next to me was rubbing my right leg with her hand, and I was doing the same to her, with my right hand. She looked like she wanted to have sex, but the other one was the nervous one. I think the two girls were lovers. By that, they kissed a few times, and that is when the one girl started to rub my leg. That is when I made the suggestion of having sex. Then, the other one by the door said, “not with a big hog like you.” That is when I went over the edge. As for them being prostitutes, they were two “lovers.” You see, I have always had a weight problem Kat. But, my ex-girlfriend, YVONNE, never mentioned that once, when [we] were together, or did her family. But, my ex-wife’s family would always say something about it.
Kathy, it really hurts to recall these events, but I will do my best for you. I told you I would help you with things for your book, and I will. But bear with me okay? You see, I am also bearing the weight of Clemency in Tallahassee coming up.
I also want to talk to Paul in person before it’s too late. Before I forget, Paul has a box of things that belong to me. Please ask him to give them to you, as I can’t have them up here. You might also enjoy listening to them, (the box of tapes.) Then you could see what type of music I used to listen to.
When you come up next time, we can clarify some things in person better. You know they scan the mail going out of here. But, I don’t care if they read mine, cause, what could they do to me? Nothing.
By the way, you know I can receive stamps in my letters from you. They don’t object to that up here.
Kat, I am going to stop for a while, cause my ear is really hurting a lot. I will write later on.
Well, I’m back Kathy. My ear is feeling much better now. Guess the medication works. I still have to take it for 10 days, then see the doctor again.
I received a letter from my attorney who is handling my clemency. We have been granted a motion for a new psychologist to examine me. You might want to contact him and come up when the doctor examines me Kathy.
Please contact him if you want to do this, cause it might help you write your book. I have no objections if you do this. But you have to have the approval of the Dr. and Mr. Bardwell. Explain to Sam what you are doing and tell him you have spoke with Christopher Quarles too.
Kathy, please ask Paul if he got my letter, cause there are some important questions I asked him I need answered. I would appreciate it very much.
This is all I can remember about that evening I question Kathy. I have tried to remember everything and come up with the same answers. I have made notes from the beginning to end three times, and come up with what I have told you. There is just nothing more I can remember about it. I’m sorry.
Don’t think I’m
not
trying Kathy. I really am doing my best for you. I know you want to portray what I was like before, during and after the killings. I realize you have previous notes from different sources, and now you want to get my side of what happened
.
Kathy, you will have
a
to get my side of what happened. Kathy, you will have a book to be proud of, and I will have a clear mind knowing I helped. I have never told anyone about myself (except for Paul) and now you in detail. Everyone was getting their facts on reports from the Police and F.D.L.E. Nobody took the time to ask my anything, the way you are. That is why, I am giving you my full cooperation and courtesy.
Guess I will close for now, write when you get a chance. I am waiting for our interview also.
 
Respectfully,
Jerry
 
P.S. Kathy, I was wondering about your typing the envelopes. I took typing in High School, and the envelopes look to be Double Spaced. Are they? Wish I had a typewriter in here. It would be a lot easier than writing. But that is not permitted here.

Other books

Amity & Sorrow by Peggy Riley
Signs of Struggle by John Carenen
Terms of Surrender by Leslie Kelly
Here Comes the Vampire by Kimberly Raye
Death Dues by Evans, Geraldine
Sake Bomb by Sable Jordan