Authors: Sara Farizan

If You Could Be Mine (22 page)

BOOK: If You Could Be Mine

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To be loved unconditionally.

and her cousin, Ali . . .

Sometime university student and all-the-time party boy, Ali shows his younger cousin Sahar the underground gay social scene in Tehran. His dealings are vague, illegal, and dangerous, but Ali continues living on the edge with a wolfish grin on his well- groomed face. Ali uses humor as an escape from the restrictions and oppression of the country he grows tired of calling home.

To be free. And party whenever he sees fit.

and her mentor, Parveen . . .

Compassionate, beautiful, and a lady in every way, Parveen teaches Sahar what it means to live as a transsexual in Tehran. She takes her identity as a woman very seriously. Parveen is a law-abiding citizen who always wears a head scarf and is a role model in the trans community. She has suffered, she has triumphed, and she is comfortable in her own skin, a trait that Sahar envies.

To be seen and treated as a lady, forever and always.

and Reza, Nasrin’s betrothed . . .

To Sahar, Reza is like Superman. He is a handsome, kind physician who seems to have no faults when Sahar wishes he did. Reza will make a wonderful husband, but he is under the impression that Nasrin will be a perfect wife. He is well meaning but is painfully unaware of his betrothed’s secret girlfriend.

To be a family man.

Meet Sahar’s father, Baba . . .

A widower who has never gotten over the death of his wife, Baba is more like a child Sahar has to take care of than a father. As despondent as he seems, Baba also makes keen observations and unconditionally cares for Sahar, even if she feels he doesn’t always show it.

To have his family back the way it used to be.

and Nasrin’s mother, Mrs. Mehdi . . .

Nasrin’s mother and the catalyst for Nasrin’s pending marriage, Mrs. Mehdi is all about appearances and has always spoiled her children with material things. Though she seems preoccupied with worrying about what others think and is sometimes calculating, she wants what she believes is best for her daughter.

For her children to be safe and well taken care of.

If You Could Be Mine

By Sara Farizan

ALGONQUIN YOUNG READERS

Questions for Discussion

“Tehran isn’t exactly safe for two girls in love with each other,” says Sahar on
page 2
. In what ways is Iran dangerous for gay people? What are the consequences of discovery?
Seventeen-year-old Sahar says she has been in love with Nasrin since she was six years old. She is very different from Nasrin—for one thing, she wants to be a doctor, while Nasrin dreams of going to India to be a Bollywood actress. What are some other differences between the two young women? Can you see what attracts Sahar to Nasrin? Do you think they would make a good couple if they were allowed to be together? Why or why not?
Was there any point in the novel when you were nervous that Sahar and Nasrin’s romantic relationship would be discovered? Were there any clues that Nasrin’s mother had an idea of what was going on between the girls before she revealed to Sahar that she knew about them?
Photographs of the late leader Ayatollah Khomeini and the current leader Ayatollah Khamenei are posted all over Iran. On
page 12
, Sahar says, “Sometimes when Nasrin and I kiss, Ayatollah Khomeini’s and Ayatollah Khamenei’s faces pop into my head.” She thinks of Khomeini as “Angry Grandpa” and of Khamenei as “Disappointed Grandpa.” What does this say about how Sahar perceives the role of government in her personal life? Do any disapproving faces enter your thoughts at awkward moments?
Sahar’s references often reflect American popular culture—Julia Roberts, Cat Stevens, Madonna, Lady Gaga—despite the fact that many Western CDs and DVDs are censored or banned in Iran. Her cousin Ali seems to have no trouble getting his hands on these banned materials. What other “workarounds” for strict governmental policies do Sahar and her friends witness or take part in?
Sahar is devastated on
page 20
to discover that Nasrin will be marrying a nice doctor named Reza—“the Superman of suitors.” She knew an arranged marriage for Nasrin was inevitable—why does it still come as such a surprise to Sahar? Does it seem out of character for Nasrin to agree to a traditional marriage? Why or why not?
When Sahar’s gay older cousin Ali says to her on
page 30
, “Sahar, it takes one to know one,” she is furious. She responds, “What you do is wrong, and I’m not like you.” What does Sahar see as the differences between Ali’s choices and behavior and her own?
How does Sahar’s angry reaction mirror both Nasrin’s and Katayoun’s responses when Sahar takes them to the gay underground scene at Restaurant Javan? How do Sahar’s judgments of Ali—and others—evolve during the course of the novel?
On
page 102
, Sahar daydreams about what it would be like to be a man in Iran. When she’s thinking about her father, whom she calls Baba, who “can’t even boil water,” she thinks she could leave him in the dust if she were a man. Despite her daydreams of male privilege, she never indicated that she felt like a man trapped in a woman’s body. Were you shocked when Sahar began to seriously contemplate getting a sex change to be with Nasrin? Why or why not?
In this novel, readers see the effects of gender-reassignment surgery on several different people, including Parveen, Maryam, Katayoun, and Jamshid. Sahar’s cousin Ali tells her on
page 156
, “A male version of you would be perverse. It would frighten [Nasrin].” What ultimately persuades Sahar that a sex-change operation is not the right choice for her?
Since Sahar’s mother died, her father has been “sleeping through life.” What finally prompts Sahar to confront Baba about his withdrawal? Do you think Sahar’s decision to stay with her father is the right one, even though he admits he is asking her to stay for selfish purposes?
When the story ends, it’s still illegal and potentially dangerous to be gay in Iran. What do you think the future holds for Nasrin? For Sahar? For their relationship?