If You Dare (20 page)

How could his lips still feel so good?
 

Cordelia felt the mattress sink with his weight, felt the constant wanting make its way through her body as he deepened the kiss.

And then he pulled his head away, dragged a fingertip down her naked shoulder and looked at her with passion filled eyes.
 

She held her breath as she waited on his words. Felt the wanting grow stronger as she waited. Oh man.

"Get dressed."

Now that was unexpected. And not at all sexy. Her confusion must've shown because he laughed and dropped a quick kiss on her down turned mouth. "Wear something casual, but hurry. I have something I want to talk to you about."

She needed to be dressed for them to talk? That was certainly a different approach.

"You're the talkingest man I've met."

With barely concealed exasperation, Cordelia grabbed her nightgown off the top of the dresser. Their last night and he wanted her dressed. Ugh!

She began to slip the silk material over her head, but he stopped her with another laugh and a soft-spoken suggestion.

"You might want to wear your pajamas."

What in the world? "Seriously?"

He shrugged. "It's up to you, but if we happen to be in the living room when Taylor comes home, that nightgown leaves very little to the imagination. Not that I'm complaining, but..."

Ah. So they were going to his apartment.

Interesting. Odd.

She grabbed her pajamas and slipped them on while he waited and watched and left her feeling completely out of synch.
 

One last night and she was putting clothes on while he watched. Had she scared him with her stupid tears?
 

As she followed him out the door she wondered what he could possibly have in mind. Why he'd choose to leave the guaranteed privacy of Irene's for the almost certain interruption at his place.

Stranger and stranger. And not at all what she'd planned when she decided to take every advantage of this last night.

When she followed him into his apartment, she couldn't help but remember what had happened the last time the door had closed behind her. She certainly hoped Taylor had better timing tonight.

Of course things had changed drastically in those few short days. Joe wasn't dragging her against his body ready to start in on some oh so luscious foreplay. And she knew exactly what it felt like to be held in his arms, to be kissed senseless, to feel him move inside her until she couldn't even breathe.

Oh man.

She watched Joe rifle through some papers. Watched him drag his hands through his hair. Heard him say damn a few times before he finally turned to her.

"Go ahead and sit. I'll be back in a sec."

This ranked right up there with craziest moments ever. Cordelia sat down on his black leather sofa and waited for him to return from the kitchen. He certainly had something on his mind.
 

Maybe she was thinking about this all wrong.

It could be kind of fun to watch him get all discombobulated. Fun to think of what he'd say and do if he came back in and she was sitting on his fine leather furniture naked, waiting, expectant.

But then, with her luck Taylor'd come home while she was sitting there.

Maybe she should put a note on the door telling Taylor to go next door.
 

Lord he was taking forever. Wasting the last few hours.

She was thinking about following him into his kitchen when he walked out carrying a bottle of wine and two crystal glasses.

"Sorry that took so long."

She laughed, trying to pretend she didn't care. "Let me guess. You couldn't find the wine."

He shook his head. "No. I couldn't find the courage."

Oh boy.

He put everything down on the coffee table next to an old newspaper and sat across from her.

Oh man, he looked way too serious. Way too intense. She tried to think of something to stop him. Something to delay, but he didn't give her a chance.

Taking her hands in his, he cleared his throat and took a deep breath. "I have an idea."

Joe tried to relax. Tried to rank all his arguments. This would be easy. Everything would work out exactly the way he planned.

He'd subconsciously been planning this moment all day. Ever since he'd seen the classifieds.

"Did you know there's a huge teacher shortage right now?"

Okay. She'd relaxed. This was definitely the way to start.

"I looked in the paper today and there are several openings for high school teachers in the area. You'd be perfect for one of the jobs. And I have some strings I can pull. Imagine teaching in one of the state of the art schools here. You'd never have to worry about what people thought or said. And you're paycheck would probably double, maybe triple."

Hell, he didn't know her salary, but he figured it might even quadruple. Especially once she added benefits and sign on bonuses. He opened the paper on the table and showed her the faculty job listings.
 

Okay. This was it.
 

He brushed a bead of sweat from his temple and took a deep breath. Taking her hands in his again, he waited for her to look into his eyes. For her to see he was completely sincere. Damn he was nervous. More than when he'd taken the bar exams, more than when he'd interviewed for the junior partnership.

"Look, I don't know what's happening between us, but I know it's special. Incredible. I can't believe what I feel for you. But when you walk in the room, I only hear your voice. When we're not together, I think about you all the time. And I think we might be on to something here."

Damn he was blowing this. He could see it in her eyes. No sense stopping now.
 

"I know this is sudden, and I don't expect you to make up your mind right away. But I think you'd be happy here. You fit in perfectly. Your sister's here. And then there's us." He stopped and willed her to remember every wonderful moment of the week. "I can't think of anything better than waking up every morning next to you."

There. That was it. Everything. He'd laid it all out, explained his reasons, given his arguments.

And she was silent.
 

Damn.

He should wait for her, give her a second. Hell, he knew the power of silence. Knew he needed to give her time but he couldn't. Not about this.
 

He tried to gage her thoughts by the way her hands felt in his. Soft, small, strong. But they didn't clue him in at all. Not a damn bit.

Ah hell. He couldn't wait anymore. "What are you thinking?"

Oh no. How could this possibly be happening? Cordelia shook her head to clear it and then looked into his eyes. "Are you asking me to move in with you?"

"That's what I'd like, but you wouldn't necessarily have to do that."

"You don't even know me, Joe. We've spent a few days together. We can't..."

"I know it's crazy. I can't explain it. But I know you feel it too. You know what I mean."

She shook her head again. "I don't..."

This time the sound of the key card in the door stopped her.

Could it get any worse?

She covered her eyes with her hand and tried to take advantage of the time Taylor's interruption was going to give her.

But then Taylor, bless her heart, did the one thing guaranteed to give her all the time she needed and then some.

Cordelia watched in stunned silence as Joe's sister pushed the door open, grabbed Keith around the shoulders and did a damn good imitation of the kiss she and Joe had shared that night after the pool party.

And judging by the look of horror washing over Joe's face, he wasn't quite ready to see this side of his sister.

Damn, damn, double damn.
 

She wasn't about to settle for clearing her throat. "Uh Taylor." Her voice carried across the room at the same time Keith slammed the door shut and settled in for the long haul.

That's all it took.

"What the hell is going on?"
 

Cordelia jumped right along with Taylor and Keith. If it hadn't been so awful, Cordelia figured it might be funny. But there was nothing funny about the sound of Joe's voice.

And there was nothing funny with the angry way Taylor was looking over a surprised Keith's shoulder.

Still for some reason when Taylor crossed her arms, cocked her eyebrow, leaned against the wall and drawled, "I think that's quite obvious, Joe, but if you can't tell, I'd be more than happy to go into the specifics, later," Cordelia couldn't stop the giggle that escaped her lips.

But then Taylor had to go and turn toward her to add, "And yes, Cordelia, we had a wonderful time. Thanks for the introduction."

Joe's thunderous look-directed toward her this time-spoke volumes, and Cordelia figured it was time, past time, he changed his attitude toward his sister.

Keith's hands were up in the air and he looked for all the world like an innocent bystander caught in the crossfire of some third world war.

In a way, Cordelia figured that's exactly what he was. He just didn't know it.

Whatever Taylor decided to do now, Cordelia decided it wouldn't be because her brother goaded her into a rash decision.

She didn't bother to ask Joe what he wanted. Instead, she grabbed his hand and hauled him off the couch. Bending close so he'd hear her whisper, she almost hissed her warning. "You love your sister, but now is not the time!"

And then she waved at the pair as she headed dragged a silent Joe out the door. "Nice to see you again, Keith. We'll talk to you two later."

Joe followed even though he was torn. His sister was totally screwing up her life, and Keith might be a great friend, but hell, he didn't want his sister sleeping with him.

"You introduced them?"

"Well you certainly didn't."

The way she was stomping around Irene's house, you'd think he'd done something wrong. "Hell no, I didn't. Do you have any idea how many women Keith's dated in the last year?"

"Do I have any idea how many women you've dated in the last year? Hel-lo, Joe. It doesn't matter."

What did the women he'd dated have to do with anything? "The hell it doesn't matter. Taylor's a freaking kid."

Cordelia rolled her eyes and for just a second looked a whole lot like his sister. "She's twenty-three, Joe. That's not a kid. She's on birth control. She ran a successful business for god's sake. Let her have a damn life."

How in the heck did she know his sister was on birth control? "She has a life. She has a fiancé. She has a business to run."

"Ex. She has an ex fiancé. In Oklahoma. Who wants to run radiator shops. She had a business to run. But she sold it to a partner. And she came out here to find a life, and you're trying to stop her. God that's so hypocritical of you."

Hadn't they had this discussion already? "It's not the same at all."

"You just asked me to move out here. Not twenty minutes ago you were telling me all the advantages of life in the big city."

"It's not the same. I already told you. Taylor's nothing like you."

"Ha!" Her laugh didn't sound like laughter at all. In fact it sounded pretty damn close to a curse.
 

"What's she going to do out here? Run a dance studio for little girls? Sleep with the first guy who takes her out? Spend all her time shopping or changing her hair color and getting her nails done?"

"God, you are such an ass."

Okay. He had to admit it. He was an ass where Taylor was concerned. He couldn't help it. Dammit, how had this night disintegrated to this?

He sat on Irene's couch and let his head fall in his hands. "You're right."

That shocked her. He could tell by her momentary silence.

"What?"

He looked up and shrugged. "You're right. I'm being a complete and total ass. I love my sister. I don't want her to be hurt. And I'm being a complete and total ass about this whole situation."

She was looking at him with a combination of disbelief and distrust and he couldn't blame her.

"You can't understand..."

She held up her hand and interrupted him. "I think it's the other way around."

Of course she would. But she was wrong. "You might live in a small town, Cordelia, but look at you. You're this incredible woman who knows what she wants and goes after it full force."

This time her laugh was filled with a warning, but he didn't know what the warning meant.

"I look at you and I think, my God, how did I ever get so lucky? And I don't want my sister looking at Keith that way. I don't want her getting hurt."

"I didn't see Taylor looking at Keith that way at all, Joe."

He shrugged. "She was looking at him the same way you looked at me a few days ago."

"That's just lust. Taylor's not going to get hurt from that."

Her words slashed through his heart with their brutal honesty.

"Yeah, I think she could."

Cordelia heard his answer, saw the way he was sitting there, so open, so intense, so keyed into her every word. Oh God, how had this happened?

"This isn't about Taylor any more, is it?"

She watched him swallow, felt her own heart ball up in her throat like swallowed ice.

He didn't speak, just shook his head. And she wanted to tell him to stop it. To let it go. This wasn't supposed to be real, dammit.

"We just met, Joe."

His eyes didn't move from hers and she felt like he could see to her soul when he spoke. "I feel like I've known you forever. I could lie to you and tell you you're right. I could say this is about lust. Sex. Fantasy. But it's about a hell of a lot more than that, and I think you know it."

She did and that knowledge should be a good thing. It shouldn't be tearing her up. She had to do this. She had to.

"You don't know me at all, Joe."

He shook his head, and oh Lord, she just wanted to let him pull her to his side. To just pretend the last few minutes hadn't happened at all.

But she couldn't.

"I'm not the person you think I am."

"Let me guess, you're an ex convict, an ax murderer, an inside trader."