Impossible (7 page)

The door opened and Mom walked out looking solemn. She sat down on the front step and patted the spot beside her. Once I was sitting down, she took a deep breath and looked me in the eye. “Do you want to tell me what happened today?”

I buried my head in my hands. “Coach already told you what happened.”

“Yes, but I want to hear it from you.” Her tone was commanding and I knew that I had to be honest with her. Maybe she was hoping I’d tell her something different, and that Coach had been mistaken somehow. Well, if that was the case then she was about to be sorely disappointed.

I exhaled. “I made fun of Elly for gaining weight over the summer and then I spilt Bennett’s coffee on her.”

Mom sighed. “Oh, Ash, what would possess you to do something like that?”

Mom knew how to make me felt bad, and believe me, I felt bad. “Kance told me that Elly liked Oliver and I didn’t want her to…well, make a play for him. It doesn’t matter anyway; it’s not like I have a chance with him anymore.” I looked up, trying not to cry for the second time that day. “And she was talking to Luca. We have to maintain a certain type of image and it’s not good for a cheerleader to associate with someone like him.”

A crease appeared between Mom’s brows. “That is not a reason to torment the poor girl. Just because she likes someone you like, and just because she treats Luca like a human being, does not make it okay for you to make fun of her.”

I stood up quickly, not wanting a lecture from my own mother. “Okay, Mom, I get it. You don’t have to make this into such a big deal.”

Mom stood up too, her hands planted firmly on her hips. “This is a big deal, Ashy. I feel like I don’t know you anymore. What happened to my sweet, little girl? Where has she gone? She would never do something like this to another person.”

“Well, I did, okay? I make one mistake and you bite my head off. Why can’t you just get over it already?” I faced her, absolutely furious. I’d already had a terrible day and I didn’t need this. I wanted Mom to hold me and tell me that everything was going to be okay, not look at me like I was a stranger.

“Ashton Blake Summers, I cannot begin to express how disappointed and upset I am with you. I can understand that you must be devastated about losing your captaincy and your position on the squad. That must be punishment enough, but I never want you to do what you did to that poor girl ever again.” Mom paused and studied me with a sad expression on her face. “You are grounded for a whole week. You cannot use the internet unless it’s for homework, you cannot go out after school, and you definitely cannot go out on the weekend.”

“Mom, are you kidding me? That’s not fair!”

“It’s perfectly fair. Once you lose the attitude you can gain your privileges back.” Having said her bit, Mom turned to go back inside.

Just because she was done, didn’t mean that I was. I was so angry at that point that I didn’t care what came out of my mouth next. “This is all your fault you know!”

Mom stopped and looked at me in confusion. “My fault? How is this my fault, Ashton? I didn’t tell you to go and bully anyone.”

“Because of you, people are always talking about us. About how you got knocked up as a teenager and how you had a failed marriage! I just want to fit in, Mom! I want people to see me for me, not as some loser’s bastard child!”

Mom’s mouth fell open. “Ashton, honey, you don’t need to put other people down to make yourself look better. Let the other people talk. Words aren’t going to hurt you.”

“That’s stupid advice, Mom! Of course words hurt me! They’d hurt you too if you weren’t stuck inside all day glued to your computer! The reason why you stay at home and create your imaginary worlds and characters is because you don’t want to go out there in the real world and face what people are saying about you! You’re giving me a lecture when you can’t even deal with your own issues!”

“That is not true!” Mom said, raising her voice.

“Yes, it is!” I continued, relentless. “You failed in life. You had a failure of a marriage with Bryan, and you failed when you had me at eighteen! I don’t want to be like you.” Even as I said each word, they wounded me, cutting deep.

“That’s enough!” Mom yelled, breathing heavily. “You have no idea what you’re talking about! I did not fail in life. The best thing about my life is you, Ashton. The day you were born, was the day I won.”

Mom’s expression was pained as she turned around and stormed back inside. In seventeen years, she had never once raised her voice at me. I deserved it though. I’d said horrible things to her; things that I had no right to say. I was a petty, pathetic person and now my mom hated me too. And I deserved it.

Falling back down on the step, I sucked in deep breaths but couldn’t hold my tears at bay. My entire body racked with sobs at my failure of a life. I had ruined my chances of being the most popular girl in school. I would never date Oliver Carson. I had lost my best friend.

The thing that cut me the deepest was the way my mom had looked at me before she’d left. The look on her face made my chest ache. My mom had lost all respect for me and I didn’t know if she would ever get it back.

Luca

I was almost home from Riley’s and had just rounded the corner into my street when I saw Ashton and her mom getting out of their car. As much as I liked her mom, I didn’t want to run into Ash after what she’d done today. That girl gave me a migraine. If I’d driven, I could’ve just pulled into my driveway and slipped inside, but Riley’s house was only two blocks away and it seemed pointless driving there when it was just as easy to walk.

I slowed down, playing with the guitar pick in my pocket. It’d been the very first guitar pick I’d ever gotten. My dad had bought it for me and I’d always kept it on me for good luck. It seemed kinda silly, but it made me feel as though a part of him was still with me.

Stopping outside the West’s house—which was two houses down from mine—I tried to scope out whether or not Ash and her mom had gone inside yet. There was no sign of them.

I ducked behind the West’s hydrangea bush when I saw Ash’s mom walk back out again. Ash peeled herself away from the car and disappeared from sight. Since I couldn’t see her mom either, I assumed they were sitting on their front step.

Damn it! I’d almost let them see me! I had to be more careful. Now was probably the best time to go inside. My fence and their car were blocking me from their view.

I stopped on my lawn. Raised voices were coming from next door and I realized that Ash and her mom were fighting. Curious, I approached the fence that divided my house from Ash’s and saw Ash and her mom stand up. Quickly, I bent down before they could see me. Their voices were louder now and I could finally hear what they were saying.

“…face what people are saying about you! You’re giving me a lecture when you can’t even deal with your own issues!” Whoa. Ash was being pretty rude to her mom. I’d never dare speak to Momma like that.

“That’s enough!” Ms. Summers yelled. “You have no idea what you’re talking about! I did not fail in life. The best thing about my life is you, Ashton. The day you were born, was the day I won.”

Wow. That was some powerful stuff. I wonder what Ash had said to get that reaction out of her mom.

A second later their front door slammed shut. I wasn’t sure who’d gone inside until I heard loud crying that pierced my insides. It was Ashton.

I hadn’t heard her cry like that since my dad had passed away. Hearing those heart-wrenching sobs reminded me of the little girl I’d been best friends with. The time when her Gramps had died, and she’d cried like that, I’d wrapped my arm around her and she’d let all those tears out. I hadn’t let her go until she’d let every last drop out.

Once I was sure Ash’s mom wasn’t going to come back, I stood up, intending to go inside. I mean, what could be more embarrassing than being caught listening in on someone’s fight? But for some reason, I couldn’t bring myself to move towards the front door. I stood motionless, listening to Ash’s sobs, and made a split second decision.

Taking a deep breath, I jumped the fence and landed on the Summers’ side.

Shit. What was I doing? I didn’t know what to say to her. I didn’t even know why I was doing this after the way Ash had treated Elly today. I was all kinds of messed up.

I’d been determined to hate Ashton and forget about her, but I kept letting myself get sucked back into her life.

As I stepped on a few dry leaves, the sound alerted Ash to my presence and I saw her hastily wipe away her tears. When she caught sight of me, her face fell and she stared down at the ground.

“Oh, it’s you.” Her voice was hoarse from crying and I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. “What do you want?”

“I heard you and your mom fighting. I just wanted to make sure everything was alright.” I dug my foot into the concrete of their driveway, feeling totally out of place.

Ashton sniffed and looked up at me with her baby blues. “Why do you care? I’m always a bitch to you.”

“You’re not wrong there,” I grinned, leaning against their car as I tried not to stare at her. Even when she had mascara running down her face, she was still gorgeous. “I guess I just rejoice in your misery.”

Ash stood up and shot me a glare. “And now you know why I’m such a bitch to you. You love making fun of me.”

Her standing up only made me stare at her harder. I didn’t want to come across as a creep, but it was hard to ignore how freaking hot she was.

Taking a step closer to her, I took in her entire figure. That cheerleading uniform did wonders for her body. It was a shame she wouldn’t be wearing it anymore. And those legs seemed to go on forever, and then some. Her top cut off around the middle to show off her flat, toned stomach. She was every guy’s fantasy.

I did my best to respond to what she’d said, even though I was finding it close to impossible. “I only make fun of you because it’s so easy.”

Ash scowled and raised her hand to slap me on the arm, but I snatched it up instead. I pulled her towards me, amused by her hot temper. She always tried to act all prim and proper, but deep down she was still feisty and hot-headed. Just the way I liked her. Just the way I remembered her.

She looked at me from under the blanket of her thick lashes, her cheeks growing pink. “Are you going to kiss me again?”

I dipped my head lower so that our noses were almost touching. “If you want me to.”

She bit her lip and glanced at my mouth. God damn, she was making this hard for me. So much for trying to hate her, I had to stop thinking about wanting to kiss her first. Kiss her and do a hell of a lot more.

“You only kissed me because you wanted to humiliate me.”

“That’s not why I kissed you.”

“You said—”

“I lied,” I admitted with a frown. “I kissed you because you reminded me of the way you used to be before you turned into mega bitch.”

“Wow, thanks,” Ash said, flipping her hair over her shoulder. Then she cocked her head to the side as my words really sunk in. “What do you mean? How did I remind you of the way I used to be?”

A smile crept onto my face. “Breaking and entering, is that something Princess Ash would do or something the old Ash would do? You reminded me of when we used to be kids. Not caring, breaking rules, being stupid. That’s why I kissed you.”

“I didn’t think I was that different from when we were younger.”

“If you really believe that then you’re delusional,” I declared.

Ash gave me a dirty look and took a step back. “If this is your way of making me feel better then you suck at it.”

“You’re not crying anymore, are you?”

She folded her arms across her chest, not looking pleased. “That’s not the point. You don’t have a clue how to talk to a girl.”

I shrugged and stuck my hands into my pockets. “I’m a rocker, baby. I do as I please.”

“No, you’re a public nuisance and you have noise control issues.”

I grinned at the fire in her eyes. She was so damn cute when she got all heated up like that. “You say tuh-mah-toe, I say tuh-may-toe.”

“Ugh!” she cried, and actually stamped her foot. “You are so frustrating!”

Ash grabbed her bag from the ground and shot me another glare before opening up her front door and storming inside. I chuckled as I headed back to my house, recounting our encounter. Even though she’d said she found me frustrating, I knew that a part of her was fascinated with me, just like I was fascinated with her.

She may hate to admit it, but a part of her liked me. Really liked me. The way she’d stared at my lips had made it so obvious that she was still thinking about our kiss.

At least my teasing had made her forget her problems, even for a moment.

Ashton

Damn that Luca Byron! Who did he think he was making me feel that way? I mean, sure he had gotten my mind off the horrible day that I’d had, but he was seriously smoking something if he thought that I would kiss him again. Sure, I’d thought about it, but I was never going to kiss the freak of the school for the second time. I still had my dignity left.

Just because I wasn’t the cheerleading captain anymore didn’t mean I couldn’t date Oliver. It was clear that he was into me, so all I had to do was work my magic on him. I could still be the most popular girl in school if I played my cards right.