Indulgence (314 page)

“Why are you so upset?”

“Because I don’t like being used, Joel, and I feel like you
did nothing more than use me.”

“Didn’t you use me a little, too? I mean, we had a good time
last night. Obviously, you needed me and I needed you. We both got what we
wanted.”

“We both got…you seriously think that?”

“Yeah.”

Anger rushed through her so fast her head began to feel
funny. Like she’d been swimming and stayed under too long. Her ears burned as
she glanced down at the plate in front of her. Not wanting to ruin her own
dinner, she grabbed the edge of his plate and unceremoniously dumped the contents
of his dinner into his lap.

She grabbed her own plate and walked over to a table where a
couple sat alone talking quietly.
Let him stew.

Watching from the corner of her eye, she saw him slowly
scrap the roast beef, gravy and mashed potatoes from his lap back on to the
plate. Once his lap was sufficiently cleaned off, he dumped it into the
washbasin where the dirty plates go, and stomped out of the lodge, slamming the
door behind him.

That should teach him not to mess with me.

Mesa slowly put the spoon in her mouth, avoiding eye contact
with any of his family. The whole dining room finally resumed talking after the
blow up, but they seemed quiet and subdued. Well, it didn’t matter whether
their whole affair made the rounds of the entire ranch. She wasn’t staying
there much longer anyway. Soon she would be home, in her own bed, curled with
up her cat and her half-gallon of chocolate chip ice cream eating her cares
away. The situation would be a distant memory just like them making love. Would
she forget? She hoped, in time.

Several minutes later, Joel returned in clean clothes but he
didn’t get another plate of food. He walked straight up behind her, grabbed her
hand, and forced her to her feet.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“We’re having this out, right now.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“Yes, you are.”

He tugged her along, practically dragging her up the stairs
to her room. “Key.” She stubbornly narrowed her eyes. “Give me the key, Mesa,
or I’ll strip you bare until I find it, right here in the hall.”

“Fine,” she growled, pulling it from her front jean pocket
and handing it to him. “I don’t want you in my room.”

“Too fuckin’ bad, baby doll, because I intend to make you
listen to me.”

He opened the door and literally pushed her inside before he
slammed it closed. “Strip.”

“Excuse me?”

“I said strip. Do it now.”

“I’m not taking my clothes—”

He grabbed her T-shirt and pulled it over her head. “I’ll do
it for you then.”

“What the hell, Joel!”

“Take it off.”

“No.”

“Fine.” He grabbed her pants, popped the button and shoved
them down around her ankles so fast, she didn’t know what hit her.

Within seconds, she stood in nothing but her bra and
panties. Desire pooled in her belly.
How fucking sick is that!
“All
right. You have me in nothing but my bra and underwear. I’m not stripping down
to nothing. Take it or leave it.”

“All right. You can keep them unless you start arguing with
me again. If you do, I’m taking those too.”

“Fuck you.”

“Only if you ask nicely.”

“You son of a bitch. Why can’t you just leave me alone? I
don’t want anything more to do with you. You’re a user, Joel, and I don’t want
to be part of your game anymore.”

“Stop. Just stop, Mesa. Listen to yourself? Do you hear what
you’re saying?”

Tears rolled down her cheeks unchecked. She didn’t want to cry
but she didn’t have a choice. His cavalier attitude hurt her heart. When did
she start caring about this rotten asshole? “I hate you.”

“No you don’t,” he whispered, stopping in front of her to
wipe the tears from her cheeks. “That’s our problem. Neither of us hates the
other, but we don’t know what else to call it.” He kissed her cheeks before he
brushed his lips against hers. “God, you taste like Heaven and Hell wrapped up
in a single package. What am I gonna do with you, darlin’?”

He kissed her again, pushing his tongue into her mouth
tentatively like he was waiting for her to give into her feelings and return
the kiss.
Why am I giving into this, him? God, I hate myself for wanting
him.

She grabbed fistfuls of the front of his shirt and pulled
the edges apart, buttons pinged off each surface they touched in their flight
across the room. He lifted his head, staring down into her eyes, his crystal
clear blue eyes bright with lust.

“That’s it, Mesa. Take what you want.” He pulled at his belt
buckle, unhooking it from the loops as she worked his shirt from the waistband
of his jeans.

His jeans and boxers hit the floor while he toed out of his
boots. She worked frantically at the clasp of her bra until it came free. The
next second her panties hit the floor at their feet and he grabbed her around
the waist to fling her onto the bed.

“I’m gonna fuck you hard.”

“Too much talking.” She pressed her mouth against his as she
ground her pelvis against his hard flesh. “Tell me you brought a condom.”

“In my wallet. Let me get it.”

He left her side for a moment, taking his heat with him
while he searched his wallet for the protection they both needed.

“How long has that one been in there?”

“Quite a while actually,” he said sliding the latex over his
engorged cock.

“I wanted to taste you.”

“Later. I need to be inside you.”

She closed her eyes and sighed a happy sigh when he
positioned his cock at her opening and slowly slid deep into her pussy.

“Fuck, you feel fantastic.”

“Deeper, Joel. Please.”

She pulled her legs up to her chest, opening herself for his
deep thrust. He didn’t disappoint as he slammed his pelvis against hers,
pushing everything he had inside her much deeper than he’d been before. Each
thrust pushed her across the bed until he grabbed her hips and held her still.

“Come for me, Mesa. Squeeze me until I explode. I wanna feel
your heat.”

With a small thought in her brain, she grabbed the pillow
from the bed and put it over her face as she screamed his name at the top of
her lungs.

Within seconds, he growled her name while he shot every bit
of his cum into the end of the condom.

He laid his head on her chest as the air sawed in and out of
his lungs in a deep pant.

“Was that makeup sex?” she asked with a giggle.

He chuckled a dry laugh before he peeked up at her through
his gorgeous lashes. “I guess you could call it makeup sex. After all, we were
having a pretty big fight.” He kissed her quickly. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too.”

He slipped out of her and disposed of the condom in the
small trashcan near the bathroom door. “I hope everyone in the dining room
didn’t hear us.”

“I tried to be quiet but it’s kind of hard with you.”

He grinned a silly grin. “I’m glad I make you lose all
control.”

“Yes, you do cowboy.” She frowned.

“What’s the frown for?”

“What are we gonna do, Joel? This can’t possibly work into
anything beyond a few fun-filled days before I go back to California.”

“Let’s take it slow. Okay? I don’t know what’s goin’ on here
either, but I like you a lot, Mesa, and I don’t like fighting with you. We have
a good time together.”

“All right. Slow. Got it.”

“Would you show me what you’ve written today?”

“No!”

“Why not?”

She chewed her lip. There wasn’t any way she could show Joel
her new book since it paralleled what had happened to her on the ranch. “I
never let anyone but my editor read my stuff until it’s been published.”

“But I want to read it.”

“Not until it’s done. I don’t know what the ending is going
to be yet and I don’t want to spoil it until I get there. I only wrote about
five thousand words today so the whole plot has a long way to go
development-wise before it’s done. I never know how they are going to turn out
until I’m finished. And even then there’s times when I change my mind about
parts.”

“All right, all right. I won’t look then.”

She crawled up on the bed to lay her head on the pillow. He
took the spot next to her and gathered her into his arms. He kissed her hair
while his hand did a slow crawl from her shoulder to her wrist.

“I love holding you like this.”

“You just want me naked next to you.”

His cock stirred, taking on a life of its own. “Well, yes. I
love you naked any way I can get you.”

“Typical man.”

A knock sounded on the door. “Are you two okay in there?”

“Yeah, Ma. There’s no blood. We’re fine.”

“Good. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Night, Ma.”

“Night, Nina.” She snuggled down closer to his chest. “Kind
of awkward, don’t you think?”

“Nah. I think my mom was trying to get us together like
this.”

“Why? She knows I don’t live here. It’s not like this could
possibly develop into a relationship.”

“It can’t?”

“No. I have my life in Los Angeles. You have your life here.
We are two very different people, Joel.”

“She’s playing matchmaker again. She told me to stay away
from you earlier.”

Mesa laughed. “She told me the same thing this morning. I
should avoid you today.”

“Sneaky woman, my mother.”

“Yep. She knew by telling us to stay away from each other,
it would force a blowup and eventually we would have to talk. Thus, leading to
this.”

“Well, she might not have thought it through to this end,
but she definitely had it right about staying away from each other. I can’t.”

She rubbed her face against his chest, loving the feel of
the springy hair beneath her cheek. “Me either. You’re like a drug. I can’t get
enough.”

“I say we let it go where it may. If this is supposed to be
something besides a short term thing, it will work itself out.”

She pressed her lips together, thinking about the situation.
Could she walk away after her week here was over without regrets? Probably not,
but she had to. Her life in Los Angeles came first. She was a writer after all.
A semi-famous author who had a full, rewarding life in the big city. She liked
having stores around the corner. She enjoyed having the nightlife and clubs to
visit if she so chose to, not that she was much of a nightlife person, but the
option was there.

Here you would have the abundance of ranch life to
jumpstart your muse. You would have the quiet, the horses, the cowboys, and the
little bar in Bandera where you could dance the night away in the arms of one
hot cowboy.

But what if things with Joel didn’t work out? What if she
gave up her life in Los Angeles, moved here to be with him, and they broke up
after a time?

I could always move back to Los Angeles at any time.

“You aren’t helping.”

“Huh?” he asked sleepily when she glanced up at his face.
His eyes were closed and his breathing had slowed into slumber. “Did you say
something?”

“No. Go to sleep, big guy.”

Soft snores reached her ears moments later as she snuggled
back against his chest. There wouldn’t be any use trying to make a decision
like this on a whim. Like he said, let’s take it slow and see where things go.
If it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be. She should be able to make a decision by
the time her week at the ranch went by.

Now, if she could just keep her heart from being the
deciding factor in the whole thing, she might be able to make an intelligent
decision.

Sunlight streamed through the window, dragging her from her
dreams. Dreams of Joel danced behind her eyelids, keeping her from fully
awakening to the birds chirping outside and the low bawl of cattle in the
distance. She could get used to these sounds. The quiet country sounds instead
of the blare of car horns, the chatter of people below her window, the bark of
neighborhood dogs and the hustle of everyone in the city. No one slowed down to
appreciate the things in life.

She reached to the side of the bed expecting to find Joel’s
warm body next to her only to find cold sheets. She sat up, pushing the hair
from her eyes and looked around the room. His clothes were gone.

“Well duh, Mesa. He works on a cattle ranch. He has to be up
with the chickens.”

The clock on the table read seven-thirty. She jumped out of
the bed, grabbed some clean clothes, and headed for the shower. Breakfast would
be served in thirty minutes and she still had to be presentable. She wasn’t
sure why she cared so much since it was a cattle ranch. They lived with dirt
and mud every day, so what difference did it make?

She lifted her arm and sniffed. “Okay. I do need a shower.”

Several moments later, she stood beneath the warm spray of
the water and drifted into a little daydream. Joel’s lips on hers, firmly
taking what he wanted. His hands, slick with soap, drifting down over her
breasts and pinching her nipples between his fingers. The feel of his lips on
the tight nubs, pulling and sucking them between his lips, drove her desire
higher. Her hand drifted down between her thighs to touch her clit. A soft moan
escaped on a sigh.

“Are you touching what’s mine?”

Now her fantasy had a voice.

“I want you.”

“Open your eyes.”

She opened her eyes to find him standing at the bathroom
door, leaning against the frame with a wicked grin on his lips.

The screech she released made him laugh. “What the hell? How
did you get in here?”

“Master key.”

“I thought you were working. I was trying to get cleaned up
for breakfast.”

“You looked like you were enjoying yourself a bit. Mind if I
join you? I could use a shower, too.”