Indulgence (394 page)

“He wasn’t a burden,” I muttered.

“Of course not, dear,” Mrs. Welsh added.

“How soon do we have to have the funeral?”

“We can do it in two days. He wanted a simple service at the
funeral home.”

“That’s fine,” I agreed. “Thank you for your help, Mr.
Welsh. I’m very grateful.” I took a sip of tea. The enormity of the situation
was starting to sink in. “Where will I live?”

“The house is paid off. It’s yours. All you have to do is
keep up with the property taxes,” Mr. Welsh explained.

“I don’t have to leave?”

“Not if you don’t want to. We can talk about it more after
the funeral.”

“You can stay here tonight, if you would like,” Mrs. Welsh
offered.

I looked at her and smiled, grateful for her kindness. “I
think I want to sleep in my own bed. Thanks for the offer.”

“I can stay with you,” Rick added.

“Yes, I’d like that.”

There was an awkward silence at the table. I think no one
knew what to say. Finally I spoke. “I don’t want everyone being all sad over
me. Can we just do something normal?”

Mrs. Welsh patted my hand. “You’re staying for dinner.”

Mr. Welsh added, “I think there are a few other things we
should discuss right now. Rick and Jenna, will you leave us alone for a bit?”

Jenna looked at her father with determination. She wasn’t
going anywhere. Rick didn’t look too pleased with the request either. I
squeezed Jenna’s hand under the table. “It’s okay. I need to do this.” Then I
turned to Rick. “Does Sam know yet?”

He shook his head, no. “I’ll go give her a call.”

The siblings left the table and Mr. Welsh began to explain
various aspects of the will. I tried to concentrate on what he was saying; at
times I was more successful than others. In a way, I felt like a zombie going
through the motions, devoid of emotion.

The five of us ate dinner in silence. Mrs. Welsh and Jenna
cleared the plates when the meal was finish. Mr. Welsh and I ended up in the
living room, discussing plans for the funeral.

By eight o’clock, I was tired and couldn’t talk about wills
and future plans any further. “I need to get some sleep. I have school in the
morning,” I said to Mrs. Welsh.“You don’t have to go. They would understand,
considering the circumstances.”

“I don’t know what I want to do right now, except sleep.
I’ll let you know in the morning.”

“Okay, dear,” she replied, hugging me yet again.

“I’ll talk to you in the morning.”

Rick and I walked into my house. I wasn’t sure what I would
find. I envisioned furniture overturned or medical paraphernalia. The house
looked completely the same as it always did. That was a relief. I heard the
door open and turned around to find Sam running toward me. I instinctively
reached out my arms and caught her. She hugged me so tightly I could barely
breathe.

“I’m so sorry, Jake,” she whispered in my ear. “I got here
as quickly as I could.”

I closed my eyes and inhaled her scent, felt her warmth, and
I was at peace. “Thank you.” Rick moved in for a group hug. I’m not even sure
how long we stayed like that. All I could think was that everything was going
to be okay because Rick and Sam were there.

My bedroom hadn’t changed since I was twelve–years–old: it
still had two twin beds, one for me and one for Rick. He used to sleep over
when we were younger. He liked staying at my place because his house was so
crowded.

“Can I get you anything a glass of water, some Tylenol PM?”
Sam asked with caring.

“I just want to get a shower and go to sleep. Will you stay
the night?”

“Yes.”

I kissed her on the cheek, then made my way toward the
bathroom.

After I showered, I dressed in a pair of navy sweat pants
and a grey tee shirt. I lay in bed for the longest time, listening to Sam and
Rick’s breathing as they fell off to sleep. They were snuggled together in the
twin bed opposite mine. I turned on the radio and eventually I drifted off to
sleep.

I was riding in the back seat of the car. My dad was
driving on a winding road. One minute I was laughing with my parents, the next
minute, I was waking up in the hospital.

I couldn’t talk because a tube was stuck down my throat.
My eyes grew wide with panic as I turned my head, looking for my parents. A
nurse smiled down at me as she gently touched my arm. “Welcome back. I’ll get
the doctor. Try to relax. I know it’s hard with that tube down your throat.”

The doctor entered the room a few minutes later. “Hi,
Jake.” He handed me a dry erase board to communicate, since I couldn’t talk.
“How are you feeling?”

Awful. Where are my parents?
I wrote on the board.

The doctor looked me in the eye. I could sense his
hesitation. “Do you remember what happened?” he asked me.

I shook my head, no.

“There was an accident, Jake. The car hit some ice and
you went down an embankment and hit a tree. I’m sorry, Jake.”

He didn’t have to say any more. I turned my head away
from him and silently cried. The monitors I was hooked up to began to beep.
Then I felt a needle pierce my arm.

I gasped for air, bolting upright in my bed. Wiping the
sweat from my brow, I tried to calm down and slow my breathing; I started
taking deep breaths. The nightmares were back. Closing my eyes in defeat, I
sighed. When I opened them, I spied Rick and Sam still sleeping in the tiny
bed. Glad I hadn’t woken them, I decided to get a glass of water, so I quietly
left the bedroom and padded to the kitchen.

Sitting at the kitchen table, I turned the glass in my hand
and nearly knocked it over when I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Are you okay?”
Sam asked, taking a seat next to me.

“Bad dream, that’s all. It’s the same nightmare I had after
my parents died.”

“Oh, Jake,” she said with sympathy as she took my hand.

“It’s not a shock Granddad died. He was eighty-five, after
all. I don’t even know how to explain what I’m feeling.”

“What’s going to happen now?”

“Mr. Welsh said the house is mine. All I have to do is pay
the property taxes each year.”

“That’s good you don’t have to pay a mortgage. You wouldn’t
believe the price of apartments around campus. This should be a relief. You’re
not thinking of selling, are you?”

“I don’t know, Sam. I mean, I stayed here for Granddad. I
could afford a dorm on campus, but I didn’t want to leave him.”

“You don’t have to make that decision tonight. Are you
hungry? I’m hungry. I didn’t eat much for dinner last night.”

Sam couldn’t quite follow my train of thought. I could
hardly blame her. “It’s two in the morning, Jake.”

“Scrambled eggs and toast.” I stood up and reached for the
skillet, grabbed the eggs and butter from the fridge, and a loaf of bread. Soon
I was busy cooking. It helped to calm me down. I wasn’t Rachael Ray, but I was
handy in the kitchen. That was a good thing, because Granddad couldn’t cook at
all.

Sam devoured her breakfast. “This is really good. Where did
you learn to cook like this?”

“My grandmother’s cookbooks. If I hadn’t learned, Granddad
and I would have starved. She took care of him for so many years, he sort of
just seemed lost when she died. I wonder if he would have lived as long as he
did if I hadn’t shown up on his doorstep.”

“My mom always says, ‘Things happen for a reason.’ Her other
favorite saying is, ‘If it’s meant to be, it will happen.’ I’m not so sure I
believe her, but it’s a nice sentiment.”

I cleared the dishes from the table. “Thanks for being here.
It helps.”

“I’d do anything for you, Jake. You know that.”

I gave her a heartfelt smile and nodded my head. Sam was a
friend I would have for the rest of my life. “Do you want to go back to bed?” I
asked, extending my hand to her. Sam took my hand and we walked back to my
bedroom.

There we found Rick sprawled out on the bed, foot hanging
over the side and the pillows pushed to the floor. Sam chuckled. “Looks like I
lost my spot.”

“You can have my bed. I’ll go sleep on the couch,” I
offered.

“No, you won’t. Get in bed,” she ordered.

I did as I was told.

“Now scoot over.”

Soon Sam was snuggled up next to me. Her body was warm and
soft and I was in heaven. Sleep came upon me quickly and the nightmare did not
recur when I was safe in Samantha’s arms.

The six thirty alarm blared in my ear. I reached over and
hit the snooze bar with the palm of my hand. Sam groaned into my chest. “What
time is it?” she muttered.

“Time to get up, if I’m going to make my first class,” I
whispered. As usual, Rick slept through the commotion, snoring away from the
other side of the room.

“Are you up for it?” Sam asked. “I wouldn’t blame you if you
didn’t want to go.”

“I’d rather stay here, in bed with you,” I admitted.

“At least you don’t take up the whole bed like some people.”

She made a joke. It was such a stupid little thing to make
me happy. Sam took her studies very seriously, so asking if I needed to skip
class and not ride my ass about it was a big deal for her.

“I don’t want to go today.”

“Okay, we’ll stay here.”

“You’ll stay with me? Really?” I asked in disbelief.

“Why is that so hard to believe?”

“Gee, because if Hermione Granger really existed, she’d be
you,” I joked back.

“That’s so sweet, thank you.”

“I’m not sure if I meant that to be a compliment or a dig at
your anal retentive ambitious attitude.”

“Ha,” she scoffed. “You love everything about me Jacob
Lewis. Don’t deny it.”

“I do, I really do,” I smiled. “I should get up and call
Mrs. Welsh to let her know I’m staying home today.”

“Okay,” Sam said, sitting up and stretching her arms above
her head so her top rode up and exposed her bare belly. I quickly looked away,
hoping to avoid detection. “I don’t suppose you know how to make waffles. I’m
in the mood for waffles.”

“I can have the waffle iron going in fifteen minutes.”

“Great. Make your phone call. I’m going brush my teeth.”

“What about Rick?”

“He’ll wake up when he smells breakfast cooking.”

Just as Sam suspected, Rick made his entrance as I put the
last of the waffles onto a serving plate. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he
took a seat next to Sam. “Good morning,” he muttered, taking a sip of his
coffee.

“Good morning,” I replied, setting the plate in the middle
of the table.

We dug into breakfast, not saying much, the only sounds
coming from our forks touching the plates.

Finally, Rick spoke. “So what are we doing today? Do you
need help with any arrangements?”

“I have to go talk with your Dad. I think everything is
arranged for tomorrow. Honestly, he gave me so much information last night, it
kinda left my head spinning.”

“What makes you think we aren’t going to class today?” Sam
asked, placing her elbows on the table and glaring at Rick.

“Because Jake is more important than a stupid lecture. We
can easily get the notes after class and read the text without sitting in a
lecture hall.”

“Finals are just a couple weeks away,” I reminded Rick.

He shrugged, not really upset. I know he had his heart set
on the NBA draft. Rick assumed he’d be picked and that was that. The confidence
he exuded astounded me at times. Rick was so charismatic, he made me believe
he’d get drafted in June. Sam didn’t talk about it. For someone who was so down
to earth and a realist, she chose to keep her head in the sand on this one
topic. I wasn’t going to say anything about the draft if it was going to upset
Sam.

“I’ll help you study for finals,” Sam said to me, all but
ignoring Rick.

“I can’t believe all this is happening at once.” The
pressure of exams, my granddad’s death and the impending funeral suddenly made
me queasy. I wasn’t even sure I could stomach being in his house my house right
now. “I want to get away after finals.”

“What did you have in mind?” Rick asked.

“My granddad’s cabin in the Poconos.”

“I haven’t been there in years. It’s a great idea.”

Sam glanced back and forth at us. “I’ve never been to the
cabin. I think it’s a great idea, too. We can stock up on supplies and go for
as long as you want.”

“Maybe Jenna can join us, too.”

“Yeah,” Rick agreed. “I think she might like that.”

I stood next to the burial plot as they lowered my granddad
into the ground. Sam stood on my left side and Jenna on my right. Mrs. Welsh
was behind me, her steady hand on my shoulder. I was grateful for the short
service. Granddad never was one for pomp and circumstance. He was happy now, I
thought to myself. He was with Grandmother, my mom and dad. I wondered how long
it would be before I could see them again. I hoped they were happy reunited in
heaven. I, however, felt sad and depressed.

We left the cemetery and had a luncheon at Denato’s. It was
a small party: the Welshes, Sam and her parents, and me. It was good being
around happy memories the Welshes and I shared of my granddad. Mr. Welsh told
some stories I had never heard before. Remembering the good times helped to
lighten my mood, if only for a short time.

When we finished lunch, I said goodbye to Sam. Jenna
followed me back to my house.

I grabbed a beer from my granddad’s stash in the
refrigerator and sat down at the kitchen table.

Jenna stood behind me and placed a gentle kiss on the top of
my head. “You did good today. I know it was difficult for you. Your granddad
would be proud.”

“Sit with me, Jenna.”

She pulled a chair from the end of the table and placed it
next to me.

I took her delicate hand in mine. “Thanks for trying to
cheer me up. I just feel a little lost right now.”