Inevitable (5 page)

“Jayne?”

I’d know that voice in my sleep. I could picture Stephen’s Adam’s apple bobbing up with the word, his deep voice pushing the sounds out as if it required effort. But I turned around anyway, willing myself to breathe easy. “Stephen. Hey. How are you?”

His light green eyes flickered over my lunch, then up to my face. I knew he must be busy with team workouts; his lean torso and chiseled arms said as much. “You haven’t eaten yet. Come outside?” He inclined his head to the picnic tables just outside the door.

Dana and I usually ate outside, but not there. We chose the grass in front of the school, where we could watch most of the student population and feel the warm sunshine beating down on us.

I ran a hand through my wavy hair, letting my fingers free fall. “I’m waiting for Dana, Stephen. Have you seen her?”

“Oh, yeah.” Both eyebrows went up. “I saw her at her locker. She told me where to find you.”

And then decided not to show up.
There would be time to kill her later. “Well.” I looked down at my sleeveless lavender dress, suddenly self-conscious. What did my face look like? Was I blushing? “Sure. That would be fine.”

Stephen escorted me outside. A slow breeze blew, and a tree above us dappled the picnic table with the shadow of its leaves. He sat on one side and patted the spot next to him.

“I met your dad.” I felt like an idiot right after I blurted out the words. Certainly there was more for Stephen and me to talk about than his parents.

“Really?” Stephen pulled a bottle of soda and three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches from his lacrosse bag. I eyed them, feeling a lump in my throat. His mom probably made those. “Where?”

Oh, great. The only answer to that would be to explain my failed interview. “Just saw him, really. We didn’t talk.”
But I know how he’s going to die.
In my head, I saw Mr. Harris step off the edge of the balcony.

Maybe getting to Mr. Harris wasn’t the answer. Maybe I should tell Stephen that his mom was sick.

And Stephen. What happened to him in all this? My head shot up, my eyes studying him, memorizing the scattering of freckles across his nose.

He squirmed a bit, looking uncomfortable under my scrutiny. “I tried to call you the other day.”

“Uh-huh.” I turned back to my food, suddenly not hungry. “The day Jessica broke up with you, you mean.”

“Hopefully you didn’t find out about it before I did.”

I recognized his attempt to lighten the conversation. I gave him a crooked grin. “I doubt it.”

“I totally know what you’re thinking. That I’m a jerk for dumping you. An idiot for liking her. You and I were totally friends before all that, and now we don’t even talk.”

I stayed silent, twiddling with the stem on my apple. What was I supposed to say? He was right, of course. That’s what I thought.

“Jayne, you’re such a nice girl.”

I winced. Nice. Not really what I wanted. “But Jessica was fun,” I said. “And outgoing. And popular.”

“No, Jessica was a ditz. It could never last. She wasn’t the type to be serious with.”

I glanced at him through narrowed eyes, wondering which had attracted him more, her boobs or the freedom. “Yeah, I bet she wasn’t. You could’ve waited to break up with me before you made out with her.”

“Jayne, quit it. I made some mistakes, okay? I’m sorry.” He took a bite of his sandwich, but his eyes never left mine. “I want to be friends again. I want to try again.”

My heart gave a little pitter-patter, grasping at strands of hope in spite of myself. “You want to try being friends again?”

“Are you trying to be dumb?” Stephen put his sandwich down and grabbed my shoulders, pressing his mouth to mine. He tasted like grape jelly. But it only took a moment before his lips pushed mine open and I stopped noticing the essence of pb and j.

I leaned into him, hungering for the warmth of his mouth. I’d missed kissing him. I wanted this back. I closed my eyes, getting lost in the memories for a moment. Hanging out in Stephen’s car, singing to 80s music while Stephen howled. Homecoming—leaning into his embrace, feeling like we would be together forever. We were meant to be together.

Except I knew better now.

“There.” Stephen pulled back and stroked my face. “Give me a second chance.” His thumb rubbed my lip. “Go to prom with me.”

I held the moment close to my heart, feeling the tears behind my eyes. What would happen if I said yes? How far would the preparations and charade go before Miss Blond showed up, offering Stephen something better than what he could get with me? I would be a fool to pretend like it would work. “I can’t.” I blinked and the tears overflowed. I pushed away from the table and grabbed my apple and chips, holding back a sob.

“Sure you can.” Stephen stood, taking my elbow. “I know I hurt you. I know it. I’m not just asking you ‘cause I got dumped. I want to be with you.”

He brought up a good point, though. I looked at him through blurry eyes. “Now you want to be with me. What about a month ago? Two months ago? How about in a month? Will you still want to be with me?” I shook my head. “No. I can’t.” I pushed past him, cursing Dana for making me go through that.

CHAPTER FIVE

I
clocked in to my second day of work already tense from school. I'd avoided Dana for the rest of the day, turning the other direction when I saw her by my locker and barely talking to her in calculus. I wanted to make it very clear that I was angry with her.

I knew she got the message. She hadn’t bothered trying to call me, though she’d sent me several texts. I ignored them. We both knew I’d check them later, when I wasn’t so mad.

“Hey, what’s up?” Friendly coworker Matt came over and held up a hand. His blond hair curled up a bit around the edges of his baseball cap, courtesy of the humidity. I stared at his hand, wondering what he wanted me to do.

“Don’t leave me hanging.” Matt grinned at me around a toothpick. “If giving five’s not your thing, we can do a knuckle bump.” He made a fist with his hand.

“Oh.” Feeling like an idiot, I made a fist also and bumped his knuckles. “Sorry. Been a rough day.”

“Nothing like working in the kitchen to make you forget your troubles. Come on, let’s show you the food prep.”

I groaned inwardly. Somehow I had managed to forget that this would also be part of my duties. I much preferred ringing people up.

Of course, I had to admit to myself, making bagel appetizers and bagel sandwiches wasn’t nearly as bad as flipping burgers or folding tortillas. At least, the reputation was better. The afternoon went by quickly in the back. A fan whirred, blowing the air around but not really cooling it. Before I knew it, Matt stood beside me.

“You’re doing great, new kid. Break time.”

“Really?” I wiped my brow with a paper towel. The hair around my head was frizzing under the hairnet, more from sweat than anything else. “Great, thanks.”

I used my employee discount to purchase a large chocolate chip muffin. I needed it. I sat at a corner table facing the window and unwrapped the calorie-laden indulgence. The fresh chocolaty smell wafted up to me and a smile caressed my lips.

I lifted the muffin to my mouth and took a bite, feeling the chocolate bits melt against my tongue. My eyes closed and I relished the taste. I was all set to take a second bite when my nostrils picked up a hint of citrus.

My eyes flew open. We baked the muffins fresh every morning, and I knew there was no orange or lemon in the chocolate ones. I spun my chair around and inhaled sharply.

There he was, standing at the register. I knew just from the back of his head. Aaron. What was he doing here? He’d been here yesterday! Surely he didn’t come from England with an addiction to JT’s.

I watched him place an order, then I swiveled back around, staring at my muffin. He didn’t know I was here. He’d get his food, eat, and leave. Tomorrow I’d figure out what to do about English class.

Several sets of footsteps danced in different rhythms around me as customers went to their tables with trays of food. Quick, hesitant, light, heavy. My ears perked up as one set drew steadily closer. With them came that oppressive lemon smell.

“Jayne?”

My heartbeat hammered in my neck. I didn’t turn, certainly didn’t stand up. “Yes?” I hoped he wasn’t expecting an invitation to sit, because I was fresh out.

Apparently he didn’t care. The table wobbled as he stepped around the corner. I stared at my muffin while wrapping a strand of hair around and around my finger.

“I hope you don’t mind,” he said, his accented voice lyrical, “but I asked the girl at the register if you were working today. She sent me back here.”

Gabby. Another person to add to my hit list.

“I’m Aaron, by the way. I met you yesterday, but I don’t think you met me.” He sounded amused and held his hand out to me.

Mine trembled as I took his. “Nice to meet you.” I wrapped up the uneaten pieces of my muffin. “Well, I think my break is about over. I better get back.”

“Oh.” I got a good look at his brown leather tennis shoes as he pushed off the linoleum floor and leaned back in his seat. “That’s too bad. I hoped to talk to you. We have English together, you know.”

“Right.” I nodded.

“Are you feeling okay?” Concern tinged his voice. “You left before class started.”

“I feel a little better. Thanks for asking.” I stood up and walked away, clutching my muffin. It was rude, but I didn’t know how else to get out of the conversation.

“Jayne.”

I hadn’t counted on him following me. His hand closed on my forearm, practically begging me to turn around. I stopped walking and squeezed my eyes shut.

“I’m new here, Jayne, and I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind showing me around town. Maybe Friday night we could go out for a bit.”

He was asking me out. Superman was asking me out. “Sorry, Aaron. I can’t. There’s a game Friday night.” Did I seriously just turn him down? “I have to get the stats right for the school paper. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, that’s no problem.” His hand dropped from my arm. “I’ll come to the game. I’m not a writer, but I know a lot about basketball.”

Why, oh why, had I told him what I was doing? Yet I couldn’t deny the twinge of excitement I felt. “Right,” I said. “See ya.”

“See you,” he echoed.

I waited until I heard the footsteps walking away, then turned around and watched Aaron shoulder his way out of JT’s. I couldn’t figure out why he was interested in me, hairnet and all. I wouldn’t even look at him, for goodness sake. That couldn’t be a turn on.

I went back behind the counter, finishing my muffin quickly before entering the kitchen.  He was super hot, after all. Maybe I could pull this off? As long as I didn’t see his death, we could have a normal, carefree experience, like most teenagers. I hummed to myself, elevated by the thought of spending Friday evening with Aaron.

Gabby and I helped Matt close up the restaurant. Not fun. It was my first time to do that. By the time I clocked out and changed into my regular clothes, it was ten-thirty. I threw my stinky uniform in my backpack, grateful I had a second set I could use tomorrow. I wouldn’t have a chance to wash this one before then.

Thinking about tomorrow made me remember Friday. Aaron. I got butterflies in my stomach at the mere memory. Tom, my manager, had agreed to let me off early on Friday if I worked all day Saturday. Open to close. Good thing basketball season was almost over.

In the back of my mind, I knew I should also be concerned with catching the lacrosse games. But that just made me think of Stephen and his kiss. Was that really just earlier today? I felt so confused now. Stephen and Aaron.

On one hand, Stephen was entirely out of the question. I didn’t want to be at his side when he met Beautiful Mysterious Blondie, not to mention that he’d totally cheated on me and dumped me. On the other hand, how could I even consider Aaron? It’s not like I could make him wear sunglasses  to prevent me seeing his eyes whenever we spent time together.

The very thought made me giggle.

Gabby stepped out of the bathroom, sporting a black tank top and fishnet stockings under her shorts.

“Aren’t you two out of here yet?” Matt poked his head into the back. “You and Gabby take off. I’ll lock up.”