Innuendo (40 page)

“I sure as hell hope so.”

In any case, Rawlins was going to do everything he could to make sure that was the case. Absolutely, because from the moment Todd stepped out of his condo and headed over to Tim Chase's tonight, Rawlins was going to be there. Yes, if Todd was determined to go fishing, then Rawlins was going to tail him, shadow him, and spy on him every second of every minute just to make sure, as they say, that Tim Chase didn't bite.

Todd couldn't say that
he wasn't glad to be back in the yellow brick mansion, but he certainly hadn't expected to be back here so soon.

It was just after eight, they sat again on the couch in the huge living room, and the thing that scared Todd about Tim Chase was how attentive he was. It was no wonder everyone fell in love with him, as Todd sensed he himself was now doing. And when Tim poured him a glass of cabernet, Todd felt like the most important person on the planet. But how was that possible? How could someone like Tim Chase give a rat's ass about him, Todd Mills, an investigative television reporter from fly-over land? After all, this guy swooning over him was a superstar.

“This is my favorite cab,” said Tim as he put the bottle on the coffee table and moved closer to Todd.

Todd glanced at the bottle and knew from the label that it had cost over two hundred bucks. Perhaps that was pocket change to Tim, but…

So how, Todd couldn't help but wonder, was this going to go tonight? Would this be a simple continuation of last night's foray? Or?

Tim Chase reached over and squeezed Todd's shoulder. “You're a good guy, Todd Mills.”

Todd was melting right there on the couch, of course, but proving true to his Midwestern roots, he held back, and simply asked, “Why do you say that?”

Chase laughed. “Because you're a nice guy, because—”

“You have people swarming over you all the time, surely some of them are decent.”

“Yeah, but none of them are genuine, none of them are real. Actually, most of them are fools.”

“Can I take that as a compliment?”

“Absolutely.”

Staring straight into Tim Chase's eyes, Todd saw it again, that unbearable sense of loneliness. Todd knew only too well what it was like to be on display day after day, to be judged by your image, and to have any number of people ready at any moment to proclaim your fall. But Tim Chase's life had to be a million times worse. Todd reached over and patted Tim on the knee, a gesture that made the star smile almost sadly.

Tim ventured, “Like I said, I have very few safe harbors.”

This was playing with fire, and it was right then that Todd knew he shouldn't have come. No, the cost was going to be too much, for his soul would be paying for this for months if not years.

Only the sound of voices from the hall roused Tim from a near sense of melancholy, and he said, “Come on.”

Setting down their glasses of wine, they crossed the large living room to the entry hall, where they found the three other members of Tim Chase's small tribe. Gwen Owens and Maggie, holding little Jack by each hand, were just making their way to the front door.

“Daddy!” shouted the boy. “We're getting ice cream!”

“You are?”

“Yeah, and we're walking!”

“Well, you be good!”

Todd watched as Tim gave Gwen a light kiss on the cheek, then gently roughed his son's hair.

Gwen, wearing a light brown suede coat, turned to Todd and said, “I don't think Jack has actually walked anywhere before, certainly not from our house in L.A.”

“Well, have fun.”

“And you too,” she said with a smirk.

Maggie looked at Todd with a kind, welcoming smile, and said, “Nice to see you again.”

“Likewise.”

Todd noticed that even though it was almost dark Gwen had a pair of large sunglasses perched atop her head. He presumed she never went anywhere without them, her makeshift disguise.

Like a doting husband and father, Tim ushered the little trio out the door, bid them well, then turned back to Todd, another huge grin on his face.

“Alone at last.”

Todd's stomach flinched. “Really?”

“Yep. The cook, the trainer, and obviously Vic—they're all gone. Oh, my God, it's unbelievable. It's just us.”

“Tim, what's that mean? What do you want from me?”

“So many questions.”

“But—”

“Shh,” said Tim, coming over and placing his right forefinger on Todd's lips.

The next moment Tim moved even closer, reaching out and pulling Todd into his embrace. Todd held back, determined not to fall, at least not so quickly, so easily.

Todd asked, “Are you going to call this research again?”

“Like I said, so many questions.”

Somewhat reluctantly, Todd let himself be pulled and enfolded into Tim Chase's arms. But was it lust, was it want on Tim's part, or just some big game? Todd reached out, embraced Tim too, hugging him, feeling that powerful back. As if in reply, Tim started trembling, a deep, slow but steady vibration that came from a pained corner deep inside him.

“Hey, are you okay?” asked Todd, holding him tighter.

Tim's head, tucked against Todd's neck, went up and down. “I'm gay-”

So there it was, the fog of deceit had lifted, exposing that very vulnerable truth, and he replied, “Of course.”

Todd rubbed Tim's back, tried to pass from his flesh through Tim's some of the strength, some of the wisdom, and some of the pride that Todd was still discovering day after day. Yes, whatever label he chose to wear, Tim Chase, America's hunk and idol, and one of the top-grossing actors in the world, was by no means straight, his lips having just betrayed the secret that Hollywood moguls and public relations firms had worked so hard to conceal.

His words all but a whisper into Tim's ear, Todd asked, “Does your wife care?”

“Off the record?”

“Yes, you fool, of course.”

Softly, easily, and without pretense, Tim said, “Gwen's gay too. Maggie's her partner, not our nanny. They've been together for nine years, longer than we've been married.”

“No shit?”

“Yeah.”

Stripped of his image, Tim fell completely into Todd's arms, just an ordinary person full of passion, desperate for touch, hungry for love. Todd tilted his head back as the firm lips came up his neck, over his chin, to his mouth. Yes, Todd realized, he very well might leap off a cliff for this guy.

“You know,” whispered Tim in Todd's ear, “I've been looking for someone like you.”

Most definitely, Todd could tumble real hard, real fast.

So there it was, Tim and Gwen, America's leading husband and wife actors, were nothing less than a queen and dyke. They obviously loved each other very much, just as they were devoted to their little boy. Tim was also obviously quite fond of Maggie, and this whole situation seemed to work quite well for all of them. It was, quite simply, a logical solution to a horribly complicated situation.

Unable to rein in his eternal curiosity, Todd asked, “What about your son? Are you his biological father?”

“Absolutely.”

“So you've been to bed with her?’

“Gwen?” he laughed. “Oh, God no. She wouldn't have me, and I couldn't get it up for her. We love each other, but we just don't work like that. That's a turkey baster baby.”

“Are you serious?”

“Of course. We had a doctor do it and everything, but…” He then took Todd's right hand and placed it on his own swollen crotch. “Enough of that stuff. Now, come on, let's go finish our wine on the patio and then… then see what happens.”

Todd knew where this was going to lead, just as he knew there was no turning back, not now, not tonight, and so he waited while the actor fetched their glasses, then silently followed Tim through the grand hall and down the staircase. A few long and divinely tense moments later they entered the tiled pool room. Tonight Tim didn't turn on the brass sconces surrounding the pool, but instead lit three fat candles next to the whirlpool. And tonight he didn't pull shut the blinds covering the French doors that led outside, but rather threw open the doors. He next picked up his glass of wine, then turned to Todd and in the faint light smiled simply and easily. Taking three steps, he was next to Todd, kissing him on the neck and taking him by the hand.

“Come on, let's go outside.”

“But aren't you worried, aren't you…”

“Shh. It's okay,” said Tim kissing him one more time. “I mean, it's not okay, but I can only take it so much.”

“On your scale it must be awful.”

He shrugged. “It's a decision I made, and now I'm pretty much used to it, but every now and then I just got to get out and be myself. Come on.”

When Todd felt Tim's lips nibbling his ear he realized that he could easily follow him anywhere. And do anything.

It was cool outside. And dark. The dry fall leaves rustled overhead in a gentle wind, and Todd peered up at the sky and saw a sprinkling of stars emerging as the evening faded into night. Standing on the slate patio that was surrounded by a low stone wall, Todd sipped his wine and looked out over the backyard, which fell away, cascading down a hill that was covered with a jungle of bushes.

“I spend so much of my time inside and behind closed windows just so people won't see me,” said Tim in a giddy, almost nervous voice, “that sometimes it…it makes me go absolutely nuts!”

Todd turned around to see him frantically going after the buttons of his shirt and ripping them open. Seconds later he yanked off his shirt and threw it high overhead. The next instant he grabbed at his belt buckle and pulled it away, unfastened his pants and ripped down the zipper. He hopped around as he pulled off his pants and his socks, then stood there in white boxer shorts. Todd glanced across the yard, wondered if anyone was lurking out there.

“Tim, aren't you a little worried that—”

“Anyone out there?” he shouted with a whoop. “This is your chance to see Tim Chase buck naked!”

“But—”

“Don't worry,” he said out of the corner of his mouth, “anybody snaps a picture of me and I'll sue ’em!”

With that he grabbed at his underwear, yanked it down, and kicked it away. Standing straight up, he clenched his fists and stretched them to the sky, then, as if he were running in place, did a little dance and whooped yet again. Stripped and exposed, the superstar then ran over to the low stone wall, jumped up, and ran along the top of it, laughing and yelping.

“Here I am, anyone wanna see? Come and get it, fresh Chase, fresh Tim Chase!”

Todd, holding his wineglass, stood there as Tim came charging along the stone wall and all but threw himself against Todd. With little choice, Todd tossed his nearly full glass over the wall and into the grass and grabbed Tim, who atop the wall stood a good foot and a half above him. Unable to stop himself, Todd wrapped his arms around the top of Tim's thighs and buried his face into the smooth, hard chest. How was he supposed to resist? Better yet, wouldn't he be a fool if he did?

“I'm glad we met,” said Tim, bending forward and kissing Todd on the crown of his head. “You seem very real to me.”

Rubbing his face deep into Tim's chest and running a hand up his ass, Todd mumbled, “Yeah, well, you don't.” Seemingly out of nowhere, Todd asked, “Let me ask you this, what do you do for sex? I mean, how does someone so famous, so recognizable get… get…”

“Laid?”

“Well, yeah.”

“That's Victor's department. He always finds me the best.”

“Like Andrew?”

“Well, aren't you the nosy one?” He laughed, then lunged forward, smashing his crotch against Todd's clothed chest. “Enough of your questions, alright?”

“Sure.”

Todd kissed him on the stomach, then stood back up and kissed him on one nipple, next the other.

“Come on,” said Tim, pulling slightly away. “Let's go inside and finish what we started last night.”

Thinking he heard something off in the bushes, Todd glanced around, then replied, “Sure.”

Todd didn't put up the least bit of resistance as Tim, naked and taunting, took Todd by the hand and led him across the patio and through the open French doors. As they entered the candlelit pool room, Todd's heart began to beat in nervous anticipation. He reached out for Tim and pulled him right against him, and they kissed, long and hard and deep. Firmly and slowly, Todd ran his hand up and down Tim's muscular back, and Tim grabbed Todd's shirt, pulled at it, popping away three buttons, and then reaching inside and desperately waving his hand over the hair on Todd's chest.

“I want you,” whispered Tim. “And I hope you want me too.”

“Absolutely.” Trying to express his last bit of hesitation, Todd said, “It's just…”

“Shh. You're with me now, so relax, just relax, and forget about that other guy, okay?”

The next instant Tim spun away, trotting across the tile decking and to a stack of towels. In the dim light, Todd watched as he reached into the subtle folds of terry cloth and pulled out something black.